Dr. Oz and Linda McMahon join Donny’s Confederacy of Sewer Clowns

Donny’s reached the ‘fuck it, who cares’ stage of the process

Donny Convict has finally gotten bored with this whole ‘let’s pick a cabinet’ thing, and it shows.

think about it: Captain Crazypants famously has the attention span of a coked-up squirrel — so of course it took barely a week for him to reach the ‘let’s just get this fucking shit over with as fast as possible’ stage of the process.

and why not? Donny’s already picked the important honchos: Matt Gaetz to lead the Department of Retribution, Pete Hegseth to head the Department of Abandoning Our Allies, and Tom Homan to lead the Department of Rounding Up Undesirables.

after that came the doling of favors to cronies. Bobby Brainworms to head the Department of Dying of a Preventable Disease, Tulsi Gabbard to lead the Department of Letting Putin Know What We’re Up To, and the Space Nazi to head the Department of Giggling Like a Loon While Breaking Shit You Don’t Understand.

so, now that those tasks are out of the way, who gives a fuck who does everything else, really?

despite being president for four very insane years, Donny still has no idea how government works. all he knows is if I can’t make money off it or use it for revenge, who cares? — and so Donny’s turned the job of filling the rest of his administration over to the barking noises in his head. he’s letting them parcel out jobs to randos from the MAGA Cinematic Universe. who gives a shit if they have experience — or competence?

how the fuck else do you explain appointing a literal snake oil salesman from TV to manage Medicare and Medicaid?

President-elect Donald Trump has picked Dr. Mehmet Oz to serve as the administrator for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, a key federal agency that oversees health insurance coverage for more than 150 million Americans.

Oz rose to fame as a frequent guest of Oprah Winfrey, eventually launching his own syndicated daytime TV talk show in 2009. Through “The Dr. Oz Show,” which won several daytime Emmy awards and reached millions of viewers, Oz became one of the most well-known doctors in the country.

His views on Covid-19, however, sparked controversy. Early on in the pandemic, for instance, Oz talked up the antimalarial drug hydroxychloroquine as a way to treat the coronavirus — despite the lack of firm scientific evidence that it was an effective treatment.

when tasked with choosing someone to oversee a department that apparently has something to do with medical shit, Donny just picked the first doctor that popped into his head. it could have just as easily been Dr. Ronny “Pill Mill” Jackson — or Dr. Pepper.

when last we saw the Ozzinator, he was running for Senator from Pennsylvania — despite living in New Jersey. after he got his electoral ass handed to him, we were all happy to assume he’d never be heard from again.

but nope — grifters gonna grift, and Ozzy’s back to fuck shit up at Medicare and Medicaid.

hey — here’s a fun clip from the covid era. in it, Oz calls for the premature opening of schools, because what’s all the ruckus about a few dead kids?

“first, we need our mojo back. let’s start with things that are really critical to our nation and we think we might be able to open without getting into a lot of trouble. I tell you, schools are a very appetizing opportunity. I just saw a nice piece in The Lancet arguing that the opening of schools may only cost us two to three percent in terms of total mortality.”

two or three percent, that seems like no biggie, right?

ok, let’s do the numbers. at the beginning of the pandemic, there were 49.4 million students enrolled in public schools in the US. so, what’s two to three percent of that number? roughly one- to one-and-a-half million kids.

I guess if you’re the Ozzman, a million and a half kids dying of covid is a small price to pay for freedom. anyway, a lot of those kids would have probably been the targets of school shooters at some point, so it would have all evened out in the end, right?

this is just the kind of guy you want managing healthcare insurance for America’s seniors and needy, right? ‘if we cut corners here or there, it may only cost us two to three percent in terms of total mortality.’

what could go wrong?

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here’s the other MAGA found object who landed a post in the Confederacy of Sewer Clowns yesterday.

President-elect Donald Trump on Tuesday named Linda McMahon, a former World Wrestling Entertainment executive who served in the first Trump administration, as his pick to lead the Education Department.

you might wonder what a person who ran wrestling matches knows about education policy, but you’d be missing the point — that being Linda needed a job, fuck-o.

anyway, her appointment is a double fuckload of ‘who gives a shit?’ for Donny — because if he gets his way, Linda McMahon will soon be out of a job.

If she is confirmed by the Senate, McMahon would oversee a department that Trump said he planned to “get rid” of as it currently exists and allow each state to individually “handle education.”

now, I hear you asking, ‘Uncle Jeff, if Linda is a crony of Donny’s, I’ll bet she’s got a closet packed to the gills with skeletons, am I right?’

oh yes, are you ever right.

just who you want in charge of our nation’s schoolchildren — someone with a knack for hiring kiddy-fiddlers.

Linda McMahon, who is co-leading former President Trump’s transition team, is named in a new lawsuit accusing World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) leaders of allowing years of sexual abuse of young boys by a ringside announcer.

The plaintiffs, five sexual assault survivors who were 12 and 13 years old at the time, allege WWE and its leaders knowingly allowed announcer Mel Phillips, who died in 2012, to groom young boys after hiring them to assist the ring crew with errands, luring them in under the guise they’d meet professional wrestlers.

she seems nice.

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speaking of seems nice, let’s turn our attention back to Donny’s nom for SecDef, Pete Hegseth.

now, you may regard Pete as just a musclebound bro with a taste for white supremacist tats, and for paying hush money to women who he swears were consensual partners — but that’s not all he is.

Pete’s also a christofascist zealot.

“that’s what the crop of these classical Christian schools are gonna do in a generation. policy answers like school choice, while they’re great, that’s phase two stuff later on once the foothold has been taken, once the recruits have graduated boot camp.”

“we call it a tactical retreat. we draw out in the last part of the book what an educational insurgency would look like, because I was a counterinsurgency instructor in Afghanistan and kind of the phases that Mao wrote about. we’re in middle phase one right now, which is effectively a tactical retreat where you regroup, consolidate, and reorganize. and as you do so, you build your army underground with the opportunity later on of taking offensive operations in an overt way.”

so, Pete’s gonna build an underground army of god-bothering zealots, while leading the actual army. great. as I keep saying, what could go wrong?

this isn’t some long-buried closet-skeleton that someone dug up. Pete said this last night.

onward Christian soldiers isn’t just some feel-good hymn for Pete — it’s a literal call to arms.

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here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

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this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.

we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.