369 Comments

That lede is double-A+.

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author

it's funny because it's TRUE

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“My savior lied for me so that I may lie for my savior.” Disciples of trump.

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One zillion per cent.

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He also injects bleach! 🤣

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Oh, how I wish he would... just a small 100cc of pure chlorine bleach. Please dipshitdon... Please 😁 🙏🏼

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I second this motion!

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I wish he’d inject bleach because he’s a super stable Orange genius and he should do it as soon as possible

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Have you seen this Brent Terhune bit?

https://fb.watch/r5vOPJ3zcr/?mibextid=w8EBqM

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Did all the sins, broke all the commandments, more crimes than Manson but also probably Jesus. Sure, why not?

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S&P just upgraded it to AAA

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No!

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I couldn't breathe for a while...

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I thought I'd choke with Jeff's calling him "God's own earthly avatar"!🤣

I want to know for sure that Donnie Shitstain hasn't replaced any of the pictures in his God-forsaken missive with pictures of himself. I can't believe he hasn't!

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I am sure there is one with him walking on water but they may need to update the one with the loaves & fishes...he appears to be grabbing all the loaves from the poor.

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How ‘bout one of him nailed to the cross with his flab hanging over his diaper? Ya know, he does like to play the martyr.

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OMG, SO appropriate! And, really no cgi or mock photos but the real deal. Want to play the victim, play the martyr? Please, step right op, A-hole!!

Such a good idea!

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Good one! You know this is all because he just hasn't thought of it yet! He's probably shaking his little fists even as we speak!!!

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I really wouldn't put it past him.🤢

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You think there’s a pic of Lord Donald printed across from the title page? Or maybe on the back jacket flap, “About the author…” Or on the front cover, so true followers of the MAGA Path will know right away it’s an original collector’s-item and not an also cheap copy?

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🤣🤣🤣

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It would make sense now that I think about it! Maybe in the next edition....

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Hopefully there won't be a Christmas Holiday edition because he'll be in jail!🤞

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He'll be selling something even weirder by Xmas.....

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A Gonzo nativity scene, with Stormy breasts-out preparing to nurse Orange Baby Jesus bearing tRump’s face, with the wise men Steven Miller, Steve Bannon and Rudy Giuliani bleeding black shoe polish with the backdrop Four Seasons Landscaping, and a Mitch McConnell turtle in sheep’s clothing staring with puzzled expression at the newborn child in golden swaddling clothes monogrammed DJT, with classified document boxes partially hidden by hay bales in the back corner of the manger bearing a gaudy neon sign blinking TRUMP

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Hopefully he’ll be selling his shit dribbling cornhole to jumbo Jon at Leavenworth! Every Vote counts! 😎

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“We are all atheists about most of the gods that humanity has ever believed in. Some of us just go one god further.”

― Richard Dawkins, The God Delusion

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I love that, and it's how I explain to believers how my atheism works.

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"I contend we are both atheists, I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."

Stephen F Roberts 1995

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The God Delusion, 2006

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Keep an eye out for churches buying these things in bulk. That way, they can skirt campaign finance laws that forbid churches from donating to campaigns.

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Yes,it’s called holy money laundering via church.

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The Prosperity Gospel was the John the Baptist that prepared the way for Donald the Savior.

Now, a con of biblical proportions.

Maybe one day Fat Fharaoh and his chariots will drown in the Red Sea of his stolen cash.

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And do you know how they make holy water? Take some water and boil the hell out of it!

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I’m comforted by the thought that no church wants to part with their own money. They’re too busy running their own tax-free scam, to contribute to his!

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We can hope but the big box church millionaire have that one hand washes the other philosophy.

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F..k that’s nasty. So as well as peddling racist Christo nationalism these so called churches are bending the law of the land for political profiteering. What is the next level of treason beyond UnAmerican ?

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WILL HISTORY STOP in 2024? In 1945, Germany’s nazi party and its destructive forces were defeated. Today the nazi party which encompasses a large segment of organizations and news outlets in the U.S. are playing footsie with the American people as they strategically feed fascist propaganda to us daily, on a multitude of platforms. Maga sees history and its lessons as bothersome as they attempt to rewrite history’s narrative according to trumps bidding. Rewriting history is the process of altering the perception of past events by misrepresenting or manipulating the narrative of the past.

“The concept of rewriting history has been greatly explored throughout the book 1984, by George Orwell. Orwell's dystopian novel is a work of fiction, but much that is depicted in it reflects the political realities of many nations, past and present. In 1984, the Ministry of Truth constantly rewrites history to conform to The Party's version of history. Every record has been destroyed or falsified, every book has been rewritten, every picture has been repainted, every statue and street and building has been renamed, every date has been altered. And that process is continuing day by day and minute by minute. History has stopped.”

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Americans have over our history periodically flirted with fascism. This is another of those times. And if we stop and think about our history--genocidal impulses toward native Americans, slavery, ongoing cruelty and efforts to prevent black Americans from developing economically, etc.-- it's no wonder MAGA wants to whitewash history. It's high time we consigned the American myth to the dustbin

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You are correct. But never have the fascists had the full backing of one of our 2 major political parties. It is a very dangerous time in the good old USA.

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And SCOTUS

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Yes! Thank you. God help us.

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There is no god, grow up.

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Sadly, I already did.

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But we're all dangerous anti fascists.💪💪💥

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ANTIFA!

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And the strength of China, Russia and the Middle East using social media against the feeble minded.

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Bill, this is sad but true. Whitewash history and brain wash the populace.

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Never thought I’d see 1984 become anything than a motion picture.

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Which is precisely why Orwell wrote it. Great artists appreciate the impact current, albeit quiet, changes will have in the future.

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I remember back when 1984 arrived, I said to myself, “No problem.”

But Orwell's title was 40 years off. If he had named the book "2024," we would be more blown away, as impossible as that seems.

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1984, The Handmaid’s Tale, Lord of the Flies, Escape from LA. Reality is stranger than fiction and more horrifying than horror! Soylent Green is people!

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Fahrenheit 451 and Idiocracy can be added to the list

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Idiot American by Green Day was certainly prescient…

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🤣 I never heard of Idiocracy so I just watched it and I laughed gleefully thru

it! Hilarialy hilarious! So damn funny. It’s funny cause it’s truly happening so then it’s not funny. But, put this movie in one of them time capsy pods so future genrations can see our garbage and how we reckin think-wise bout gallons and buckets and objectifying. Trump judge should be like “gavel/fist pound - guilty. Peace out” no Not Sure cawz dat orange blob has no tattoo to pay his bonds and shit.

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I know right? so glad you enjoyed it as prophesy.

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Shit for Brains kept 1984 right next to his Hitler bedtime story book 📕 on his nightstand!

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Politically induced cultural amnesia. Guaranteed to create a miasma of social rage akin to that so often experienced by individuals suffering memory loss and dementia. What a way NOT to govern anyone ever.

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Just like Stalin.

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“Gee it’s good to be back home again.back in the US , back in the US ,back in the USSR !😵‍💫🤮

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Q: "what kind of dipshit buys a bible from a racist adulterer?"

A: First class.

Thanks for the laugh Jeff, enjoying my subscription immensely.

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author

I never actually answered the question raised by the headline, did I. I guess it's a rhetorical question

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I'm not too proud to confess that the headline of today's post was intended to be a placeholder to be re-written later, and I kinda forgot to get to it

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yet we didn't know that, but see it as perfect...cause we're all asking the same fucking question!!!....I am actually tired of typing, "you can't make this shit up!"...in response to the shitshow coming from them and him...

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Save it for stupid Saturday!😊

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You create perfection, then second-guess it. Your only flaw!

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Yes, but who doesn't second guess themselves? What I like is Jeff is so fucking funny but so relatable

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Surely you’ve heard of Fuckface Von Clownstick who doesn’t ever, EVER second guess himself.

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Surely we will not compare our friend Jeff, with THAT AssClown...but I get your point.

And of course many of us will second guess ourselves, if you are a narcissist sociopath that would be highly unlikely. When you have no sense of empathy or responsibility to others, why worry?

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It was indeed the perfect lede. I didn’t intend to make that rhyme, I guess it was ordained.

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founding

you're forgiven lol

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I think it’s the question that needs to be asked, and it gets to the heart of that matter: His fools lap up what he is and sells, the purchase of this Bible marks them for what they are: Christofascists.

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Mar 28·edited Mar 28

Funny how this fucking atheist clown who's net worth was increased by Forbes to over $6 billion is now selling Bibles in an attempt to cover his broke, sorry, phony, crooked ass. And as Jeff indicated, his latest scam will sell out as the mindless MAGAs will never learn. We can only guess what's next on his pathetic, never- ending grift list. Perhaps pieces of fake fur from that thing on his head, minus the DNA.

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Hey, it was pretty much only Jesus who was badmouthing racism. (the parable of the Samaritan.) Most of the Bible is from the point of view of the Chosen People, not an anti-racist position.

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Ditto

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His cult will never learn. How sad. But today's description is going to need its own page pretty soon. 😂😂 Damned brilliant. I'm anxiously waiting for April 15. Let's go to court and get it done.

Or a coronary...whatever. ✌️

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Let’s put the big dream out there…a coronary or a stroke on April 15th after the opening statements. Gotta watch him squirm a bit first…or better yet, while they are dragging his fat ass out of the court room in cuffs because he couldn’t keep his ketchup eating hole shut.

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His slogan for his bible is Let’s Make America Pray Again. Oh Donny, if you only knew - you’ve had millions praying for your demise for years!!

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Proof that PRAYER is bullshit.

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I thought it was make America PAY again ?By the way,seeing that it’s a religious item is it tax exempt ?😜🙏😇

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Well, he’s got those big legal bills, and the RNC is going to run out of money, so he’s got to raise the cash somehow. And he has all that experience hocking worthless junk, so his latest scam fits right in.

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TRUTH🙌🏽

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TRUTH! 👍

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If I close my eyes and wish hard enough, I might be able to make it happen. 😂

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Let’s all try that. We have the power to make it happen.

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I have a voodoo doll. And I have friends who hex.

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Bring it on Cassandra.. and maybe a wooden stake too.. just in case 🙌🏽

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founding

I'm with you

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MAGAts aren't capable of learning.

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Or, we get to play Trump, the Game: go to court ( pop the popcorn and wheel in the carnarvel wagon) get convicted, go to jail. Rinse and repeat?

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Or a coronary… rude! 🤣

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I'm surprised that he didn't add a Book of Trump to that bible.

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Book of Trump. Do unto others before they do unto you. And grab them by the pussy

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Why are the pages STICKY. ? 🤢

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😂😂🤮

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🤮😂🤮😂🤮

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Is that, ketchup? Cause, you know he reads it SO OFTEN!

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I’ve been wondering myself. But then considering who would actually buy this crap, not really😂.

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Listen to his ad...he mentions the "movie stars" Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John...then babbles something about a book of Donald...so you're not far off. His vileness knows no limit.

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I think he has written 'The Book of Donald'...it's 4 pages long and written in crayon!

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And in ALL CAPS. Probably the page numbering will be off.

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Wrote it out in phonetic’s. Faw his phuken moreon phans!🤪😜😵‍💫

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Or thick scrufty black magic marker. Whatever.

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Someday I'm sure they will put his tweets in a book and vile people will read it & laugh at all the bullying and cruelty in his words.

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Seriously??!! Oh my dog...

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Susan Jane: brilliant idea. This could be the next edition. Really plausible that he could start selling the enhanced edition with Book of Trump included. I hope it happens. This entire grift is genuinely hilarious.

It is way better than the gold sneakers. This one rolls together cultist zealotry, christofascist symbols , white supremacy, all of the MAGA markers. And it’s topped off by a fabulous sales pitch that was to move the emotional needle and get the credit cards snapping. So blatant and vulgar !! It hits all the right notes.

Where is John Waters today? This level of tawdry vulgarity is his sweet spot.

The comic relief has been refreshing. I can’t stop giggling appreciatively.

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" See more fucked up movies ".

* John Waters

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Ha ha! My daughter was seated across the aisle from John Waters on a flight a few weeks ago.

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I have to reiterate: I find this Bible thing to be pure comedy. No cruelty or violence or anything..not even the creepy racism that went with the gold foil gym shoe grift.

The beauty of this… the purity … is his unabashedly pimping and grifting his most gullible followers. It really is pure humor

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I am totally envious. He is a genius. And actually a lovely person (despite his personna of being trashy etc) LUCKY DAUGHTER

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I've also met him, but it was years ago at the Baltimore premiere of Pink Flamingos. I was a student. What an occasion that was! My daughter didn't mention that to him. She didn't want to intrude, but she did say hello and tell him how much she enjoyed his work. She said he was nice.

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Hey, when, he said “legions of people”, my mind went right to “my name is legion” because there were so many demons in the possessed man in the real Bible. 😳

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"We are many. We are legion."

"The Exorcist"

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Mark 5: 5-9 King James 🙏🏾 And yes, indeed, the mother of fear films the original Exorcist.😱

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He’d have to learn how to read and write….!!

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Surely, some insane, GQP hack is furiously scribbling those passages, probably on the sides of his 1982 Chevy rape van.

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Oh I’m sure it’s on its way! 😂😂😂🤮

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Coming soon! 😆

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Thank you for including the Christianity Today article. Actual Christians need to stand against this hateful and cruel man. He’s so fucking ridiculous on top of it all. It’s embarrassing.

I have a proposal. Every time he begs for cash, send some to Democrats or Pres Biden’s campaign. I know I’m motivated to do that every time I hear his lies.

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I agree and think highly of Christianity Today, but I am skeptical about the number of "true Christians" are going to push back on Trump's vulgar blasphemy.

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The Christians I know well wouldn’t buy this nonsense but, I admit the Christians I’m close to have my same political leanings

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Yikes! You trying to bankrupt us?

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😂😂. Explains why he’s raising so much money!

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Holy shit on Holy Week….your run on descriptive sentence is spot on as usual! How can people be so dumb?( don’t answer… I have a brother…)

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Holy Week - is it not ironic that trump began selling these the day after “Holy Monday” which was when Jesus asserted his authority by driving out all of the people using the temple for self-gain? 🙄

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"Little Donny Fuckface is what would happen if the seven Deadly Sins became a real boy. let’s run through the list: pride — yup. greed — you betcha. lust — just ask Ivanka. envy — no shit. gluttony — have you seen his waistline? wrath — ducked any ketchup bottles lately? sloth — the lazy fuck drives his golf cart right up onto the green".

You are the best, Jeff! I love this!

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Haha - your description of tfg leads me to think that you must have been the one who wrote this for Clark Griswold in “Christmas Vacation”: “I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is.” Good job - I love it!

But seriously (🤪🙄), I heard that he originally was going to sell the Bibles for $69.99 but they removed the 10 commandments and reduced the price to $59.99. 😁

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Oh groan! Good one.

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I would expect those 7 deadly sins (so incriminating!) to be disappeared also.

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Haha! That’s hilarious 🤣

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Brilliant Barbara!! I choked on my hot tea laughing!!🤣

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😂😂😂

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Who else didn’t have Paper Moon — a cautionary tale about a grifty, shifty Bible salesman and his sketchy daughter — becoming an allegory for the presidential race on their 2024 bingo card?

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He is such a fuckin asshole he really is. He needs to fuck right the hell off

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Straight to Fuckoffistan!

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🤣🤣🤣🤣

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I’m with you Janine and Juli!! He can fuck the fuck off straight to fuckoffistan which is next door to Hopeyouchokeonagerbil and across from Ratsareshittingonyourtoupee..

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Joe Lieberman is dead………………..anybody?...................crickets……………. https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2024/3/27/2231952/-Joe-Leiberman-is-dead?utm_campaign=trending Be sure to check out the Kos comments.

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Decades too late but better than never?

Yey?

Aloha, shalom, AMF?

All of the above.

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HA! The comments were wonderful! 😄 I too, was not fond of Lieberman. He was a corporate Democrat and I did not know his wife lobbied for the health and pharm industries. I did know that his 1st wife was a reform Jew while he was Orthodox. Talk about fire and ice!!

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I used to think highly of Lieberman until he got involved with No Labels--a harmful exercise in wishcasting.

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My Goodness...it's interesting to read what people are having for dinner. 😂😂😂

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😂😂

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I hope the Pearly Gates are locked.

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Crickets about Haiti, as well. Seemed this little country ran out its quota of media attention.

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Well of course. It’s only brown/black people dying, and in a country with no petroleum or precious metals. Why would we be interested in them? Some people are having trouble remembering where Ukraine is on the map right now.

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Unfortunately for its suffering citizens, as long as Haiti has its sugar plantations it will remain on the corporate radar. Google The Fanjul Family for further info 🍭

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Bought and paid for! Typical!

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Always speak good of the dead. Joe is dead. Good.

RIP Jackie “Moms” Mabley.

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A wonderful tribute to a wonderful lady and Joe is dead - good.

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I'm trying to figure out how one reaches the precise level of brainlessness that permits bodily functions and excludes thoughts entirely because I have no idea how eighty million fuckers managed it in perfect four part harmony.

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They drank the Bleach!

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Zombie!!

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“It’s my favorite book” says the idiot who has never read a book in his life. 🤣🤣🤣

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Word is.. that Jesus is calling in sick for Sunday , the resurrection is off ,he’s going to sleep late ,can’t face the old man with this shit going on ! Thinks the crucified and dying for our sins thing ,just didn’t catch on !😇👎 On top of that he caught word that the Anti Christ was gonna fire him !🤯

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