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Ole Anderson's avatar

You lead with a non sequitur something something about LGBTQ youth. You are part of the problem of Why we lost all three branches of government this election.

People are exhausted by this being the top issue for Democrats and here you come out of the blue complaining yet again and totally out of context.

Can’t you just drop it for a minute? Are things really that bad for these folks? I don’t think they are.

All I know is that most people are more concerned with issues affecting their own continued existence. And I imagine a majority of LGBTQ people have the same concerns these days.

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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

"Are things really that bad for these folks?"

yes it is, and this isn't really the venue for this kind of squabbling

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Wendy🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

Thank you Jeff, as a trans woman who consistently deals with the kind of abuse and harm that makes is "That bad for these folks?", I think Ole's comment is mean to inflame, but that is maybe just my sensitivity talk.

Regardless jeff, thank you for defending.

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Marlene Lerner-Bigley (CA)'s avatar

We have your back, Wendy. Jeff’s answer proves that. My best to you. 💕

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Wendy🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

Oh, Marlene, Im 52 years old, and Im a Mama bear with huge claws and the hide of an old boar thick enough to stand such things. They have to try hard to get under my skin. But When they touch younglings, and I see it. My voice goes 5 octaves lower, my claws come out, and I get VERY mad.

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Marlene Lerner-Bigley (CA)'s avatar

Yes, I can’t stand it either and I am not quiet about it. I have a trans great- nephew and a gay great-nephew. Happy that their parents and grandparents support them.

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Heather BSN's avatar

We have your back, Wendy! I have two trans kids and shit is scary and bad. that dude needs to drop off the earth right now. ((hugs))

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Ole Anderson's avatar

Wendy,

It was not.

Am I not allowed to voice an opinion here?

Perhaps I am in the wrong place.

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Wendy🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

Its hard to not take your statement as dismissive about my experience, and the experience of those who are younger than me. You dismiss the very experience that we go through daily from a judgemental society that hates us, lead by a president who wants to erase us. And you have the audacity to say "Are things really that bad for these folks? I don’t think they are."

You are vastly mistaken. I've been queer and trans a very long time. Until you've walked a mile in my 4 inch stilettos, I don't think you get to ask that question.

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Babe Paley's avatar

People who think that others should "just drop it" when they are under attack, and should just "wait for the right time" to assert their right to just BE have never been in that situation and lack the imagination or empathy to think they ever will be.

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Wendy🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

I cant argue with that statement.

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Barbara Morgan's avatar

💙✌🏻

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Wendy🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

You want to walk a mile in my shoes, Ole, there is a good amount of my autobiography out there for you to read. I dare you to try reading it, and understanding it.

https://thistleandmoss.com/p/my-house-of-pain-published-chapters

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Ole Anderson's avatar

You are really getting all up in my face here, woman. Or whatever your pronoun is.

Don’t be ‘daring’ me to do anything.

And get over yourself. You made your choices. Now have the guts to accept the consequences.

My mothers bridge partners included many gay men and perhaps one trans person, I was never really sure. But I have always been very supportive of gay rights from an early age- you don’t know me.

But I grow weary of the increasingly strident voices of your movement.

You see everything as a slight, when it is not nor was it intended to be.

But you keep alienating every ally who doesn’t exactly conform to your own personal views.

And while I have your attention, how about you quit hawking your own products here.

It is wearisome

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Diane Findley's avatar

NOT a choice! Did you "choose" to be straight? In other words, you could have easily gone either way but "decided" to be straight.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Yeah, everybody block this idiot troll.

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PTW's avatar

You were correct in an earlier post, Ole. You DON'T belong here with this attitude.

There is no need to attack people for their life experience that **you** don't understand. If you didn't like Wendy's comment, you are capable of just scrolling on by instead of starting an online fight with her.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

It's okay Ole, I'm on your side. I live in Berkeley, and it is not a major issue here. I was supportive of the trans woman who worked at my husband's Starbucks of choice, as was everyone else, and I'm supportive of my husband's gay nephew and his husband. From the time my husband was a teenager, one of his best friends was gay (this was 1966) and we've had his ashes here for 15 years, since his family would have nothing to do with him. There aren't a lot of these, and for some reason, republicans think the country is packed with them. I remember my sister-in-law's brother, who volunteered to pick up our wedding cake. I remember how when he was in the hospital in 1984 dying of AIDS my mother-in-law and brother-in-law spent days at the end sitting by his bedside. Oh, and did I mention our next door neighbors, who have been a lesbian couple for 15 years, with two little girls? Be more worried about people trying to walk in four inch stilettos. And I love the Harry Potter books and movies.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

"Be more worried about people trying to walk in four inch stilettos." Elaborate on this, please.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Sorry, I guess you haven't tried. I didn't want to shorten my wedding dress, so bought a pair of 4 inch heels. Then I spent three weeks wearing them around the house to get used to them. I don't think that's possible, because they are so uncomfortable and awkward, and all I can say is that I'm glad I got married in my parents' living room. Of course the reception was in the back yard, which I spent punching holes into a fairly damp yard, due to a recent rain. They are very difficult and uncomfortable to walk in, and I would only do it once. I know a lot of women don't seem to care about uncomfortable shoes, but I don't want to wear them. Someone in four inch stilettos is at high risk of twisting an ankle or falling over. I'd worry about anyone wearing them, and don't even think about running from a fire without taking them off.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Oh I have a long, fabulous history with stilettos, hon', at a variety of heights. I just found your post a tad...unclear? Like, what's your point? You're siding with somebody arguing against the rights of a marginalized community yet compelled to then describe your record of supporting/not treating queer people with hostility throughout your life?

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Sorry, I can't help. Don't walk next to an unmarked police and be unable to run in stiletto heels. I'm not going to argue with you about my life. If you don't like the way I live it, stay away. I don't care how you live your life, and I thought I made that clear.

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Heather BSN's avatar

why are you on his side? because you know gay people. that is like when someone says they have "fill in the blank minority group" friend. that doesn't absolve your bigotry and hate and dismissiveness of others lived experience.

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Heather BSN's avatar

your behavior and words here prove that you do not actually support gay rights. you make me sick. and you know what her pronouns are because she told you. you are being ugly and you know it.

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DR Darke's avatar

Ole, Ole Anderson—you can just fuck right off now.

That your CisHet Privilege and...go away.

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Robert Eckert's avatar

Of course you are allowed to voice your opinions. Your posts are still up, aren't they?

But the thing is: we are allowed to voice our opinions also. If you want a place where you can rant and never hear any criticism, then indeed you are in the wrong place.

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Heather BSN's avatar

is your hate an opinion? is your dismissiveness an opinion?? yes, you are in the wrong freaking space. >:(

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DR Darke's avatar

If you're going to be a bigot, Ole?

Then, yes—yes, you are.

The Nazi Bar is over 🖕 That Way—I'm sure you'll be much happier among your own hypocritical kind.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Thank you, Jeff. It frequently feels like nobody cares about our community. Nice to know some still do.

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

Of course I do. Not a question.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

I have personally known 4 trans individuals, three patients and one family member. I cannot imagine the difficulty of trying to find their identity and their place in the world, a world in which many not only do not accept them but actively persecute them, for something so deeply personal and let's face it, of little to no consequence to anyone else. They deserve privacy and the same human dignity owed to all. They exhibit tremendous courage and fortitude to pursue their own happiness and self acceptance. Hateful bigots should work on themselves, not worry about others.

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Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Truer words Doc!!

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Ole Anderson's avatar

Jeff

Evidently when you say the name Rowling it becomes such. And I believe it would be ‘they are’, and I don’t believe it however it’s phrased.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Cool, continue to not believe it, despite all evidence to the contrary. You even have TWO people from the community speaking out, yet you refuse to listen.

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Ole Anderson's avatar

I see gay and trans people daily where I live and have never witnessed a single case of harassment

No matter how provocatively and inappropriately dressed some attention seekers are.

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Joyce's avatar

I am so getting the "And I have a Black friend" vibe from this. Also, a very heavy dose of "If you didn't complain about your being oppressed, the oppressors would probably support you." Might as well throw in the time-honored admonition to "You should smile more."

And let's not overlook the undertone to that 'provocative dress' comment....

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arne link's avatar

Provocative dress, like ol Krusty Kristy?

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

Yeah, let's all share our bona fides about how relevant we are. Maybe people can just STFU about their two trans friends and get how insulting that is.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Ew, you sound like such a creep.

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Robert Eckert's avatar

Obviously you are not the kind of person they would feel comfortable sharing their experiences with, for reasons that you continue to underline with every post you make.

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John Glocke's avatar

Assuming you're not just trolling: citation needed for it being the "top issue for democrats." Their most recent presidential candidate was pretty mealy mouthed about it, at most.

You know who does make it a top issue, all the time? Republicans. You may support distancing or throwing LGBTQ+ people under the bus because the media and opposition won't stop bringing it up, but others don't. And it seems very naive to think there aren't objectively harmful policies being supported or implemented to harm LGBTQ+ people, right now. I'm glad you're in a position to not be troubled by that, but try to empathize with those who are not.

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Ole Anderson's avatar

I don’t support making it the headline of a post which is not remotely about that.

But I already knew the haters would call me anti the issue, which I am not. I am just opining that maybe we should tone it down a little.

Is that so foolish an ask?

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

Considering the very real threats facing our community, yeah it is.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

“Haters.” You’re showing your cards. Take a walk.

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PTW's avatar

I propose we all block Ole so he can only talk to himself. Who is the only person he listens to anyway.

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Charles Austin's avatar

No, don't block him. We should be big enough to have honest disagreements. We don't need circular firing squads.

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Hannah Olufs's avatar

Yup.

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Alethia St. Joan's avatar

“Why we lost all three branches of government this election.” You mean due to the outrageous and vile anti-trans campaign dished out by the right to the tune of a few hundred million dollars while Democrats barely acknowledged the trans community at all, even when pressed on the subject.

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Tess's avatar

My son volunteers for the Trevor Project…taking calls from suicidal youth. I don’t think that is a good thing, but hey-if you do…. No one said it was a top issue for Dems….and obviously-the same concerns are what affects LGBTQ folks.

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Charles Austin's avatar

Hell yes they're bad! Your rights depend on their rights.

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Ethereal fairy Natalie's avatar

Yes. Human rights are all our rights, if we aren't all free, no one is free.

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Ole Anderson's avatar

What I have seen was the Democratic Congress bending over backwards to criminalize any discrimination against this group in a manner not seen since the Civil Rights campaign of the 60’s.

Yet it is Never enough!

What atrocities are being committed against this group which I may be unaware of?

Anybody?

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Robert Eckert's avatar

Attacking us has been the top issue for REPUBLICANS. And yes, we are very concerned about issues affecting our continued existence.

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Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Ole, mon Amie, I think you might have just stepped in it, the vitriol on Jeff’s site is usually directed at the fuckery of a corrupt system of governance, and it’s abuse of we the serfs!!

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Kate's avatar

You sound like a real peach, Anderson. Maybe read the room next time.

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Heather BSN's avatar

FYYFF! what the hell are you even talking about?? is it bad for the LGBTQIA+ people?? YES IT IS!! jesus are you freaking oblivious?? do you know no gay people?? I have two trans kids and goddamn shit is bad and scary! just because this doesn't affect you doesn't make it unimportant. let's hope no one comes after you because who will be there for you! jesus!

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DR Darke's avatar

::Are things really that bad for these folks?::

You mean transpersons? Yes—yes, they are, and they always HAVE been.

For every step forward, "Liberals" like you push them four steps back into the closet, saying "Now isn't the time!"

Okay, when WILL be the right time? When you're dead and buried and no longer have to face any challenge whatsoever to your sense of CisHet Privilege head-on?

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