249 Comments
author

there's an alternate theory that Trump's lawyers kept him sedated so he wouldn't melt down in the courtroom. I'm not buying it

Expand full comment

Temper Tantrum Trump would never allow his half ass lawyers to give him a sedative.

Trump just came down from an Adderall or cocaine high and couldn’t get his fix.

Expand full comment

This one gets my vote lol

Expand full comment

Trump is asleep again today!

Expand full comment

Being a complete asshole is hard work !

Expand full comment

The photos make me wonder whether D-F-F is painting his eyes bags a different color than his face. Kinda look purple to me.

Expand full comment

That's probably the natural color at this point.

Expand full comment

Crash!🥴🥴

Expand full comment

And burn….🔥 straight into the abyss.

Expand full comment

💯 correct

Expand full comment

For a good laugh: https://youtu.be/AVetNcRKTF0?si=ddB_HQVPYW8z1y7e

Expand full comment

At least this toddler makes sense…sort of. Is he planning on running for president ?

Expand full comment

Little Donnie may be too far gone to know if they did. But I'm not buying it, either!

Expand full comment

No if it was that he’d have been agitated. I believe they slipped something to him

Expand full comment

the dude is so full of drugs, what difference would a snort or two make?

Expand full comment

And full of a Second Amendment in his pants. Still laughing at that line and that hilarious expression on his face that looks like he blew a load. Very funny shit Jeff.

Expand full comment

He tried using anally ,but his sphincter couldn’t hold it in long enough to get a buzz 🐝. He’ll never be able to do the jail house butt smuggle !

Expand full comment

😁🤣😕😒

Expand full comment

Could go either way, really. A point - unlike most defendants, he had zero support with him. No wife, no children, no one. He stood alone. Take a moment to appreciate the damage to his psyche.

Here's a guy who goes at great lengths to only deal with people who agree with him every step of the way because his ego is so glass-thin that it bears no contradictory information whatsoever before shattering.

Alone. In a room where most everyone is justifiably angry at him. Some may hate him. A man who puts a lot of effort into never looking at angry faces and always reassuring himself he has the support of millions.

On paper.

When things are going well.

But when he's in the crosshairs of the consequences of his own actions? Alone.

I understand why he might be tired.

And point.

And laugh.

Expand full comment

That OrangeShitstain has the thinnest skin and he can’t handle the TRUTH .. he wouldn’t know the Truth if it smacked the fuck out of him and laid him out. He’s a lifelong Grifter who needs to go to prison.. but I’m totally ok with him getting the Fuck beat out of him just for shits and giggles. I’m simple that way..

Expand full comment

Just take one look at those fish-belly bags under his eyes. While he is putting makeup on his hands a little under-eye, orange concealer might also be in order.

Expand full comment

That's not makeup, it's cheeto dust. 😆

Expand full comment

Oh fuck that was funny Donna!!!

Expand full comment

😁

Expand full comment

🤣🤣🤣🧀🧀🧀

Expand full comment

While everyone is giving him makeup tips…maybe he should paint wide-awake eyeballs on his eyelids

Expand full comment

That was great!

Expand full comment

😆😆😆

Expand full comment

I think those bags under his eyes need a contrasting color, maybe purple eye shadow there would really make those eyes pop.

Expand full comment

Conspiracy theory: someone switched his Adderall with Z-Quil.

Expand full comment

Dozin' Don looked like he just came off a five day bender. Looked absolutely terrible. Yeah, this is who we want to lead us.

Expand full comment

Joe Biden should start using that moniker in his rallies when talking about his opponent.

Expand full comment

That was my theory because if he was my client, I’d want him sedated. With that said, the Adderall thing makes more sense. Nothing that he or his attorneys do will keep him in line for the entirety of this trial.

Expand full comment

I’m more inclined to believe what you said; that he was up all night snorting adderall and just crashed. I have some experience in matters like that. Just not with Adderall.

Expand full comment

That's what I assumed.

Expand full comment

100% this was my first thought when I heard about the big ol' dummy falling asleep. Someone mashed up a Tylenol PM and threw it in Diet Coke.

Expand full comment
founding

I'd keep him sedated too if I were his lawyers. Simply to get him to the end of the trial so he'll pay them.

Expand full comment

If he was sedated, maybe they hired Stormy Daniels to slip it to him. She's his type!

Expand full comment
founding

feel free to keep any money I've spent on you posts so far. I'm not able to read them giving the amount of email I'm getting. Old friends are getting spammed etc.

Expand full comment
founding

Hi Jeff - please unsubscribe me. I'm unable to do so. You're too popular. thanks for your consideration. - leigh

Expand full comment

Yesterday in a Manhattan courtroom, high drama!!!!! Judge Merchan to Drumph: "If you disrupt the proceedings, you can be excluded from the courtroom and committed to jail based on your conduct and the trial will continue on in your absence…do you understand?" Drumph – “Hey Judge, just let me sleep, will ya?”

Hey, Doofus, what more do you have to do to prove to your minions you are not WOKE? You appear to be sleeping. Your head keeps drooping down and your mouth goes slack. Maybe if you make loud snoring noises in court your loving hoards will finally get the message - Don Snoreleone!

Pretty funny that after months of freakout over Biden's age & mental acuity, Dumbo is now sundowning in front of us, regularly lapsing into literal gibberish. Sleepy Joe? – Pish Posh! How about, SLEEPY DON THE NODFATHER! lol! Best you stay asleep doughboy, at the rate you are losing money in the market, you oughta stay off the Adderall for a while too. You know what? Maybe we should just let R.I.P. Van Winkle sleep forever. Wheel him into a fake Oval Office on the back nine of Dump National, tell him he’s the president, put him on a hamberder/diet coke routine, play a nature video, quietly close the door, and walk away. Just forget about resting in peace Douchebag. Your special place in HELL awaits you!

Expand full comment

Nodfather omfg I love it

Expand full comment

Nodfather Snoreleone

Expand full comment

😂😂😂

Expand full comment

Dying crying LAUGHINGGGGGGG 🤣🤣🤣😅😅🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment

It hit Xtwit last night after Don Snoreleone had gained footing, no doubt there are many others.

Expand full comment

And such an amazing array of memes that I had to resist filling my FB page with them. Folks are quick and clever.

Expand full comment

yep, i flooded the boat with this one, every time I edited i either discovered or thought of another quip, i just couldn't help myself 😁I quit watching late night comics a long time ago, bet they had fun on this history making day! if only the laughs could convert to votes against him.

Expand full comment

RIP would be a fitting end. Just perfect. However, at the rate he is going, he is probably benefitting from some time away from electronic media which seems to prevent him from sleeping from what I hear. So, he probably is having health benefits from being in court and getting a chance to sleep. Also, his heart may be getting a rest from constant drug snorting, so all in all this case is probably good for his health, except of course the stress. I also am wondering why no one is suing him and every one of his lying dog Republican cohort, for slander. I think we should start seeing a lot more Republicans worrying whether the big buck donors that they are catering to by catering to Trump, will supply them with enough to be multi-billion dollar settlements too.

Expand full comment

will he ever really pay for his nonsense in the courtroom

Expand full comment

we have six weeks to find out, all we can do is pray he has a cardiac fart action 😁😕🤣

Expand full comment

Imagine the high drama - wheeling in a crash cart for an infarct! Also love your idea to "wheel him out to a fake oval office on the back nine"..... then "quietly close the door and walk away".

Expand full comment

if only it were that easy Steve.........................

Expand full comment

💨💨💨💨

Expand full comment
founding

PLEASE

Expand full comment

Sir Nodsalot or Sleepy SlackJawed Don Snoreleon 😁

Expand full comment

they flow like honey from a hive

Expand full comment

Happy second day of Hush Hashanah everyone!

Expand full comment

LOL My favorite holiday!

Expand full comment

🤣🤣🤣👏🏼👏🏼

Expand full comment

Is this anything like Festivus? He seems to have a lot of grievances.

Expand full comment

It will be once he’s off to prison!

Expand full comment

Jeff, your collection of images of tfg today is hilarious. The NBC image shows a very broken sick man and what can you say about his poopy pants pic other than it writes its own captions, one after another after another, he is one gross MFSOB..

Expand full comment

Yes, he is one sorry mofo who looks like he has been rode hard and put away wet. lol

Expand full comment

He is the spokesmodel for the rode hard and put up wet set Victoria!

Expand full comment

The poop meme looks like he's having an orgasm. He's enjoying his natural bodily functions bigly.

Expand full comment

😊😁😂🤣💯 equal to five stars if not more!

Expand full comment

The first thing I thought of when reading about Trump repeatedly nodding off at his criminal trial was that he was experiencing depression and was trying to escape the moment the best way available to him. Six weeks with no rallies, limited to his whiney, failing Truth Social and brief appearances at breaks must be highly depressing for him. This criminal trial will undoubtedly make his dementia worse and more visible. As Jeff would say, "Boo fucking Hoo."

Expand full comment

There's always the weekends for cult gatherings and mass grifting. Gotta keep slinging the red meat to the losers or they might not cough up their tithes.

Expand full comment

also Wednesdays, the court is closed to the trump trail.

Expand full comment

TRump will have CuLt 45 rallies on weekends - you can bet on that. He feeds off of their hatred energy. It nourishes his sense of importance. Yuck.🤢

Expand full comment

Right. I had forgotten abut weekends. It will be interesting to hear if the gibberish content increases as he comes under increasing pressure.

Expand full comment

It is difficult to imagine a higher payload of gibberish than his Gettysburg Address

Expand full comment

Check out Randall Stephens,

@Randall_Stps on the Elmo platform, hysterical clip on that exact WOW address.

Expand full comment

This is when you know a Trump supporter is one of the most stupid people on the world….i read an article about some trumper who had bought a bunch of the stock when it came out and now lost a ton of money in it. The reporter asked him if he was upset about it and he replied that if he could he would buy more because as soon as doofus becomes president the stock will skyrocket. I cracked up for about five minutes at what a complete idiot who has enough cash to invest in the stock market thinks is going to happen to stock that is plummeting and will be worth zero by the end of year. I don’t have a bit of sympathy for him. He thinks he is really savvy in the market and he is getting his ass handed to him very soon because he continues to be brain dead and believe in a huckster. It reminds me of when I had used to talk to Amway disciples who were going to get rich selling all that crap but just ended up with a lot of it in their basements. At least they could use it to wash clothes, but the Trump stock will be at zero by EOY. Idiots—every single one of them and they will never live that down.

Expand full comment

Yeah. About 30+ yrs ago I finally talked my West Coast friend into realizing Amway was a scam and to drop it. And today... yup, you guessed it. He is a Trumper.

Expand full comment

"Amway" describes Trump's business interests quite accurately.

Expand full comment

I think I saw that too, he was wanting more tanking junk stock because dear leader "was in charge of it and has a plan" #SAD

Expand full comment
founding

See now I was immediately thinking Adderall 🤷

Too bad he didn't fall down and die mysteriously...

Hope the judge gives him enough room to "hang himself"

Thank you Jeff for keeping it fun and real 💙💙💙

Expand full comment

Perhaps Sudden Death Syndrome?

Expand full comment

Or Sudden Asshole Death Syndrome. Yes, it's very SADS.

Expand full comment

🏆🏆🙂

Expand full comment

SADS!!! 😂😂😂🔥🔥

Expand full comment

Spontaneous combustion ? 🔥

Expand full comment

That’s always my choice.

Expand full comment

I love how you left off the “human” part of the term!

Expand full comment

From Tribe Law:

“As DA Jeff Berman has documented in “Holding the Line,” Trump got his corrupt AG Bill Barr to undercut the usually independent SDNY so it would go after Michael Cohen while sparing Individual #1, ie: Kingpin Trump! That’s why this hugely important case limps into court 8 years late. What Trump did here he’d do with DOJ everywhere if he ever becomes POTUS again.”

When will Bill Barr be prosecuted?

Expand full comment

Agreed they all have broken the law and betrayed the US

PUT THEM ALL IN JAIL

Expand full comment

Or the Congressional reps & Senators who colluded with tRump?

Expand full comment

He looks absolutely terrible. Hopefully he feels just as bad on the inside. He deserves all of it.

Expand full comment

I hope he has a fatal disease but I’ll be really thrilled if he has Alzheimer’s. They’ll throw him in some home and throw away the key. No one will ever come see him and he will just go away.

Expand full comment

Like father like son !

Expand full comment

I like your "throw away the key" part. I hope he's as fully cognitive (as possible) so he gets the full hellishness of prison time. Hoping he lives a long miserable life behind bars. No TV,wifi, phone. Just alone with his own "thoughts", i.e., grievances.

Expand full comment

All of it and so much worse/more.

Expand full comment

DJT down another 3 bucks right now. I hope the trial goes down like the stock, in the shitter.

Expand full comment
Apr 16·edited Apr 16

The thought occurs: the ReichsTwitter account is broadcasting even when he's in the courtroom. Trump may have a "Secret Service doesn't know how to guard him in Riker's" issue, but Dan "Thumb Boy" Scavino does not. And I'm willing to bet there will be whining at contempt time that Trump himself didn't violate the gag order. Fine. Toss Scavino's soft white ass into Riker's. The problem will solve itself.

Expand full comment

Rikers is right across from the Courthouse.

Expand full comment

Convenient!

Expand full comment

They have cots for naps there...

Expand full comment

If you can block out the constant din.

Expand full comment

Susan, We hear over and over that it's impossible to jail Trump because of the Secret Service detail. Really? I keep thinking about Napoleon and parking him on an island (Elba and Saint Helena). Why? Jail = a space to contain Trump whereby all the limitations of a Rikers Island apply. Done. Also, if Trump is found guilty, he needs to be stripped of his presidential privileges. The military provides for this. As the once upon a time Commander in Chief, Donny could be counted as serving in the military (I know, hard to swallow that one!) and with a dishonorable discharge, he would lose EVERYTHING. And may he rot there alone.

"With this characterization of service, all veterans' benefits are lost, regardless of any past

honorable service. This type of discharge is universally regarded as shameful, and the

social stigma attached to it makes it very difficult to obtain gainful post-service

employment. Additionally, US federal law prohibits ownership of firearms by those who

have been dishonorably discharged. [2] In most cases, a person who receives a

dishonorable discharge loses the right to vote and the right to receive governmental

assistance of any kind . "

https://www.vetverify.org/javax.faces.resource/images/VOSB-Military-Discharge-Overview.pdf.xhtml?ln=default&v=1_0#:~:text=Dishonorable%20discharges%20are%20handed%20down,assault%2C%20murder%2C%20etc.)

Expand full comment
Apr 16·edited Apr 16

Gitmo, it is.

Expand full comment

Let’s do that to Mike Flynn also. He’s getting $100,000/yr pension of taxpayer money

Expand full comment

It’s evident that even being drugged up to his eyeballs can’t keep Donny from behaving like a “ginormous asshole.” Because that’s all he knows how to do.

Expand full comment

The Orange Idiot is about as useful as an asshole with taste buds!

Expand full comment
founding

Mothers of tall children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren who are priming to be tall according to their current percentile, ask that you not call Barron “freakishly tall”.

If he goes into business or politics and proves to be a glass bowl, go ahead and call him anything but for now, he’s an 18 year old who’s probably horribly self conscious already.

Expand full comment

What an astute and kind comment. My stepson is 6'7" and my granddaughters will both be 6'. They are all so beautiful and smart.

Expand full comment

My thought exactly. I adore everything else in this post, but I cringed when I read "freakishly tall son." Hands/words off Barron. The poor kid already has to deal with the Dotard as a father.

Expand full comment
founding

We’ll see what he becomes.

Expand full comment

Well, firstly, Trump cannot be that kid’s father

Expand full comment
founding

You’d think so - but the resemblance is and always has been unmistakable. Plus I’m sure there was a DNA test in utero

Expand full comment

Agreed. I'm in a lot of liberal FB pages, and people have left him alone (his 3 eldest siblings, not so much), but they earned it). I've seen people get jumped in these groups for saying anything about him.

I noticed in 2017, between Easter and Thanksgiving, he shot right up, got to be even with his mother in her heels. There must have been a lot of clothes-shopping trips over the past 8 years.

Expand full comment

Truth Social stock prices have further to fall. It's what happens to meme stocks of companies that are financially underwater and propped up by a few loyal fans who don't mind losing money because somehow it's a badge of honor to support Dear Leader. They should know by now that everything Trump touches, dies.

Expand full comment

He needs rk be left with DUST

Expand full comment

If this were anyone else, I would be pitying the state he's in, the stress he's under, but I cannot find it in my heart to forgive him for being a weak, completely selfish fuck who sold us all out, lock, stock, & barrel, to Putin. Not just the US -- Trump and his minions are giving him Europe, too.

If that weren't enough, he's enabled a bunch of petty dictators like Gov Dr Evil Hot Wheels, who isn't even bothering with concentration camps -- migrants go straight to the ovens (or in this case, razor wire.)

I have no pity or forgiveness for the entire bunch of them. Let them languish in prison long enough to lose all hope, then send them to hell. And it pisses me off that I feel justified for wishing this.

Expand full comment

Anyone who DOES have pity for Trump needs their f*cking head examined.

Expand full comment

What certainly won’t happen to Trump is what the historian Livy described as “the old punishment,” dealt out to traitors in the pre Republic days. He will not be stripped. His neck will not be pinned to a wall with an oversized fork. Two burly men with clubs will not show him the error of his ways. And for this, we can all be thankful, especially him. However, I do feel that, to paraphrase Philip Marlowe, the batting staff of the New York Yankees couldn’t give him what he deserves.

Expand full comment

Right on all points. Rapist, traitor, white supremacist, LIAR ... and for me, making fun of a disabled person *smh*. 🥺😢

Expand full comment

I was thinking it’s part and parcel of Alzheimer’s symptoms. And old age. And the result of extreme meltdown posting all night and into the early morning hours, emanating from his paranoia, fears and high anxiety. And his drug regime. And having to endure hours of being compelled to sit in an environment completely out of his control. And….

Expand full comment

He's SUNDOWNING earlier, every day.

Expand full comment

To me, it looks ADD/ADHD + having to sit in one place for hours on end, probably exacerbated by lack of sleep. (One reason stimulants like Adderall or Provigil are prescribed for ADD/ADHD.) It's also a lot harder to manage when dementia's involved.

(My dad had dementia and ADD/ADHD; he was nothing like Trump (and despised him) but did develop a lot of obsessive/compulsive behaviors as the dementia progressed -- for example, he accumulated enough boxes of KN95-type masks in the 2-3 years before he died to fill a 6-ft high cabinet, even though the asthma he had for most of his life had been cured more than a decade earlier. Since 2020, it's been a family maxim that Dad would have been better-prepared than anyone to deal with the pandemic.)

Expand full comment

I am so sorry about your father. It's tragic to watch. I'm just hoping that Twitler hits the down hill slide fast now, so there is no way that he could be on the ballot. That said, if he's propped up like Ronnie, who knows who will be the monster behind the scenes running the show. I have zero faith in Congress and SCOTUS is terrifying.

Expand full comment