389 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

hope you folks aren't all commented out from last night's festival of schadenfreude

Kay-El's avatar

I said my piece on your laugh riot yesterday and in a little note I wrote in celebration. Some MAGA boi told me I was a hate-filled miserable cunt. I can’t figure out how he knows me so well. πŸ€”πŸ˜‚

Carolyn O'Daly's avatar

And who turned us into hate-filled miserable cunts???

Doreen Garza's avatar

Little Donny fuck face of course πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

arne link's avatar

You are like most of my friends. Please come and sit by me. I would enjoy your point of view.

Sooz Hall's avatar

And may I sit on the other side of you, even though today I’m slightly less hateful? I’m sure tffg and the maggats will return me to full ire soon enough.

Kay-El's avatar

I would be honored to

Vickie Berry's avatar

πŸ˜†πŸ’ͺ🏼

Susan Niemann's avatar

HAHA! πŸ‘βœŒοΈ

Eileen's avatar

Nasty women! That's right, shit-weasels!

Patris's avatar

I think we’re already in the club. Our secret sign is the middle finger, yes?

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

πŸ˜πŸŽ―πŸ‘

Deb's avatar

Can I join, too! We could have T-Shirts made!πŸ‘šπŸ˜‚

Kay-El's avatar

Anyone can join, but no MAGAs unless they’ve seen the light (doubtful, nobody’s home)

Doreen Garza's avatar

Omg hilarious!! I’d love it! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Warren Tipton's avatar

🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

DR Darke's avatar

Well, he's just envious because his tiny dick can't possibly satisfy you! 🀣

Kay-El's avatar

I imagine it would shrivel up to Trump’s size or less

DR Darke's avatar

Sorry, I'm getting out the electron microscope to see if you're right or not.... 😁

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

πŸŽ―πŸ˜πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Doreen Garza's avatar

I love it πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Cat Cafe's avatar

Hello my new best friend!!

Kay-El's avatar

And I’m a kitty mom too!

Cat Cafe's avatar

Us hate-filled miserable cunt kitty moms have to stick together!

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

He sounds jealous, probably an Incel, unfamilar with a woman's anatomy.

Diane J's avatar

Be proud, you showed you weren't fu king brainwashed.

Kay-El's avatar

Someone called you a cunt? Fuck that noise.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Unless they are British (they call men cunts, and it is hilarious)

Kay-El's avatar

That’s true and twat as well

Deb Martina's avatar

Hell no, been waiting for the full assessment. Knew you had some fun shit to share with your favorite people πŸ˜‰.

And, as usual, you nailed it.

Drumpf is a convicted criminal. Period.

Bout fuckin time he was held accountable for anything.

Victoria Wilson's avatar

Yes, I agree. Too bad the 2 other trials were "Delay, Delay, Delayed" out of being held before the November election because of some rat-fuckery from crooked judges and other such bull pucky. Now we gotta come out to vote in such ginormous numbers so that Little Donnie Fuckface can not have one "witch hunt" doubt as to who won. Then let the other trials be a'commencen'

Rick Calegari's avatar

Not a chance that many of us will ever run out of comments when it comes to the convicted felonious shit weasel. My wife and I made it through about 2 minutes of his whining and same old bullshit this morning before we changed the channel. Very disturbing how many people continue to open their wallets after the verdict and probably even more after his TV performance of meandering and bitching.

Merc's avatar

Trump dead Enders won’t stop till their bankrupt

Rick Calegari's avatar

Sad but true and a large percentage of his donors are folks he could give two shits about.

Kay-El's avatar

Right? Why the hell do you want to be a member of a club where its β€œpresident” hates all the members?

Patricia Gomes's avatar

He doesn’t give two shits about anyone but himself

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

see: Sundays Doonesbury cartoon.

Laura Boatner's avatar

I don’t think he’s raking in the donations like he says he is.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Yeah, he's such a liar.

Patricia Williamson's avatar

He raised about $35 million last night.

Eric Smith's avatar

And 34.95 million will go to his lawyers.

shee-rah's avatar

They’re all suckers and losers.

Sharon C Storm's avatar

He’s no longer β€œTeflon Don”!

SPW's avatar

He’s more like Dent & Scratch Don now.

Diana-Sedona's avatar

That’s a wonderful thing and long, long, long overdue!

Eva Porter's avatar

I still feel a slice of dread that this orange, bloviating loser could still be the POTUS.

Sheila D's avatar

I think I'm going to have to be sedated to watch the Election Returns in November. My last nerve is shot to hell!

Monnina's avatar

I recommend a companion bottle of 12 year old single malt whiskey, unless you are on the wagon, in which case - a ton of ice creamπŸˆβ€β¬›

Sheila D's avatar

Not on the wagon. I was thinking a bottle of Green Spot or Red

Breast.

DonP's avatar

Go for the Red Breast 15. It's delicious.

Diane J's avatar

This is why we need to get rid of the EC and go to popular vote. Most people think he's a pos.

Carol Jacobson's avatar

Me too. I’m not sure there is enough alcohol to get me thru it.

Barbara Morgan's avatar

Mine too, going to be drinking White Russians all night

Cats πŸˆπŸˆβ€β¬›'s avatar

I feel the same way. I do not drink alcohol or eat ice cream so I don’t know at this moment how I will get through that night.

Linda Silfven's avatar

That will definitely be a gin and tonic night... and whatever else I can get a hold of.

Jodi Richard's avatar

Putting this into the universe as a mantra to say every morning, afternoon and evening. β€œOrange stinky ass will stroke out, will not win an election, will win the biggliest and best stroke of all time!”

Patricia Gomes's avatar

A stroke is in order, with aphasia so we never have to listen to his voice again.

Cathy Carrozza's avatar

Jeff reading your column always makes me laugh and have some hope. However I believe that we are far from out of the woods with mango man!! Billionaires are all in to back him as he sells our country to the highest bidder! It is all about power and money and no decency! On another note if they kick NY out of the Union those red states will be hurting. How much revenue does NY supply to the red states that can’t make anything work? Hoping to find some hope!!

Joanne Filipo's avatar

Nope, do not (I do too) but not today!

Chris's avatar

Nah, give us more! Also- let’s see if the MAGA troglodytes decide they want to ban Britannica, you know, the same company who sold your parents encyclopedias that they obviously never got around to reading.

Deb's avatar

DeSatan is probably already insisting it be taken off shelves in Florida!

Ellen Howe Ballou's avatar

πŸ”₯πŸ”₯πŸ”₯πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜†πŸ‘πŸΌ

MountainBoyMike's avatar

not sure about comments, but my cheeks are certainly sore from all the laughing and smiling since the news came out yesterday!...it is comforting to witness that our justice system is still alive despite what the GQP has done to undermine and manipulate it...of the 4 trials, this one had the least meat, but it served an important notice to American democracy, I just wish we could get to any of the other 3 trials before the election, but that's where the GQP has fucked with judge appointments enough so that we are in a 'delay holding pattern'...but it will be interesting to see what the long range fallout is from this...the koolaid guzzling bobblehead lemming cultists are too far gone, and emperor bloatus could shoot their mothers in the middle of 5th Ave and they'd still worship his blubber, but there are a lot of independents who could see this verdict for what it is...in the mean time, I am going to enjoy the pure schadenfreude we have been given!

Stephen Brady's avatar

Great take, Jeff! I was surprised this morning after I read CBS, NBC, and USA Today sites that he didn't seem to post anything to his failing bloviation site last night. Maybe Ol' Todd Blanche got through to him that he went through a major phase change yesterday and anything he says to honk the Judge off might buy him some time in Riker's? Also, Todd crossed the line a few times with Judge Merchan... could this Judge make a referral for discipline to the NY State Bar?

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

More like they had to sedate his bloated carcass.

DonP's avatar

Jeff, if you aren't aware, there was a meme that came out last night. "All you folks better settle down, or Canada's going to start thumping on the floor." 🀣

Charles Austin's avatar

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Karla's avatar

Never..we’ve waited a long damn time for this.

JCfromNC's avatar

β€œWhen I have nothing to say, my lips are sealed. Say something once, why say it again?”

David Jones's avatar

The schadenfreude is not nearly over yet.

arne link's avatar

IDK, I'm pretty tired...

Doreen Garza's avatar

Jeff the itty bitty violin for itty bitty hands for little Donny fuckface fuck around and find out!!! πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ˜‚ ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

Runfastandwin's avatar

Tiedrich haiku

ha ha ha ha ha

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

ha ha ha ha ha

Bob Bowden's avatar

Guilty on 34 counts = 2 Tiedrich Haikus (2x 17 ha’s)

Bob Bowden's avatar

(my undergrad degree was in Applied Mathematics)

PJ Adk's avatar

Best response ever! πŸ’™

Derek Smith's avatar

JD Vance: "...subpoenaing Judge Merchan and his daughter.”

For what, exactly? Being upright citizens?

The numbnuttery of these TπŸ’©p fellators is off the charts. Worse than 9/11 and Pearl Harbor?

SMFH

Bill Lawrence's avatar

MTG doesn't know any better than her moronic utterances, but J.D. Vance has a working brain and knows full well the absurdity of what he is saying. He's unredeemable, jettisoning his integrity for a shot at VP, the fool. And the irony is, Trump won't pick him: he's too much of a threat to the walking ego.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

We know that at some point JD Vance HAD a working brain. Perhaps no longer true. Maybe he voluntarily had parts destroyed for enhanced career success.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Perhaps he had a lobotomy voluntarily in order to join their party I think they threw in some permanent eyeliner as well. (I, myself, have had permant eyeliner since 2009, so I know the look.)

Kathleen Weber's avatar

Natalie, are you a Good Fairy or a Wicked Fairy? On second thought, don't answer that question!

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Even the good fae are wicked by human standards.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

Well, that make sense. Every time I catch a refreshing dusting of your blue fairy dust, I feel a little bit out of control.

Mary Schweitzer's avatar

Vance never had any integrity. My parents were from deep southern Appalachia (WVA and KY backcountry) and the word β€œhillbilly” was not permitted in my house. He betrayed all his ancestors with that disgusting book.

Susan Niemann's avatar

Exactly right... JD Vance is such a moron. πŸ™„

Ellen Howe Ballou's avatar

and the word moron is just *screaming* for a preceding adjective….I have one in mind.

Lynn Van Haren's avatar

More a soulless opportunist

Charles Austin's avatar

He's a piece of shit!πŸ’©πŸ’© This Ohioan apologizes.

DR Darke's avatar

If only he were a moron, rather than a crooked opportunist.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

I still can't believe he got elected after trashing president Zelinskyy, he has a large Ukrainian contingent.

Merc's avatar

Fake Hillbilly is right - JD VANCE would be happy to exploit the chromosome deficient, MAGA goobers who he duped to elect him

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

The cheese has slipped entirely off their cracker, and has hit the floor.

User's avatar
Comment deleted
May 31, 2024
Comment deleted
Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Maybe to congratulate him on a job well done. Mr Soros knows a Nazi when he sees one, his life depended on it.

JOEL's avatar

Perfect Moments in American History:

-signing of the Declaration of Independence

-Union defeat of the Confederacy

-the end of slavery

-winning WW1

-women getting the right to vote

-winning WW2

-the abrupt end of Criminal Nixon’s presidency

-the conviction of America’s Disgrace, liar, fraud, con Trump on 34 felony counts

-massive heart attack or debilitating stroke suffered by Trump

PollyP's avatar

No heart attacks or strokes yet. The maggots will just scream a conspiracy that he was murdered. He needs to be soundly defeated at the ballot box if we can overcome the gerrymandering, intimidation, and other forms of cheating. I want him to see another huge defeat and then let his broken down body and mind have at it.

Eileen's avatar

I am guilty of watching too many movies, and given my penchant for being entertained by over-the-top endings, I want the full-on two-fer fatality. For example: Trump on the receiving end of the best fossil fuel inspired "donation" for his quid pro quo back room campaign finance criming:

...Thoroughly satisfied, Trump points down at the crowd assembled below as the oil tycoon's helicopter lands on the cement and steel hunk of a Gulf oil rig. Meanwhile, Billy is rushing through his chores so he can join the crowd of fellow roughnecks on the deck. But he fails to sufficiently tighten the seal. Minutes pass. The oil exec, wearing a tie matching Trump's, stands grinning next to the Orange Messiah as he ticks off his top ten lies at the microphone on the makeshift dais when suddenly! Oh God, no! A "super hot zinc bromide completion fluid blows out a hose coupling spraying" both Donnie and his oil billionaire. Later, a witness described the scene as pure mayhem, "You could see Trump's security lunge forward then think twice and retreat. Weren't nothing they could do to stop the direct hit on the president and Mr. Ewing. You could see his skin looked like it was melting off him like a loose latex glove. Closed coffin for sure..."

Yeah, I looked up worst accident on an oil rig so my gory details were accurate.

If we could tie Trump to a Kremlin-bound missile from Ukraine, that would be a nice two-fer ending as well.

Charles Austin's avatar

I don't really give a hot fuck what they scream.

Discreet Music's avatar

Saliva loss of control aphasic stroke

Patricia Gomes's avatar

And Melania will sit by his side to wipe his drool. NOT !

Vickie Berry's avatar

I’m totally in for the last one!

Cheryl Keeping's avatar

Your mouth to Karma's ear......then the whole clown car of deplorables could melt right the fuck down and drain away.

Lisa Leonardi's avatar

I hope this turns into a documentary, devised perhaps by Michael Moore?

Beth Smith's avatar

Ugh, I live in Jim Banks’ district. (Also Mike Braun’s, but I can only take one nightmare at a time). It’s awful here in rural red America but at least I know there are others out there that think like me & I thank you all!!!

Cheryl Keeping's avatar

Oh, honey. Me, too. Living blue in a red state is a drain on my sanity. I'm in Braun's district. Ugh.....

Beth Smith's avatar

Solidarity to my NE IN sister! πŸ‘Š

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

I can relate, I live in Flori-duh.

Mark Slattery's avatar

Gee, if only the stable genius who did nothing wrong had testified on his own behalf (as promised)...

Bill Lawrence's avatar

Yes, then we could have added perjury to the list.

Diana-Sedona's avatar

Surely that would have convinced the jurors of the whole ordeal being a β€œwitch hunt”! 🀣🀣🀣

Flower Child's avatar

It was a great day to see Donnie get f*cked. Surprisingly, there wasn’t anything in the NYT this morning about why this is bad news for Biden. Strange.

SuNew's avatar

No worries. Hugh Hewitt was on NPR this morning blathering about how 34 Guilty Verdicts was SO good for wee donny. Undoubtedly the NYT will catch up.

Kate's avatar

Ugh, where did they dig up that troglodyte from?! Nice Polite Republican radio can get all the way bent, too.

SuNew's avatar

I know. I could only stomach so much before I switched over to my audible book.

Charles Austin's avatar

NPR has gone to shit since they started having corporate underwriting.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

David Koch poisoned that well before he died.

Discreet Music's avatar

Track down Chris Cillizza wherever he is now, I guarantee he'll have an angle about how this is really bad for Democrats.

It won't make sense but so what.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

I can never see his name as anything other than Clitlizard. They must be a strange species.

Crystal M's avatar

πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

don't worry, they'll be back to being assholes to Biden by nightfall.

Sooz Hall's avatar

πŸ˜†πŸ€£πŸ˜œπŸ˜†πŸ€£πŸ˜œ

Cassandra Here's avatar

I’m doing a bit of basking … and meme collecting. The Rule of Law, baby! Finally.

Diana-Sedona's avatar

The meme gods were working overtime! Loved them all.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

"bless the meme-lords for they shall make us laugh".

Susan P Thatcher's avatar

And, of course, Ted Cruz leading the "it's rigged" charge even though his name and (ugh) face were plastered all over exhibits about how a tabloid rag was used to quash his candidacy by the guy wearing the boots he's licking his own shit from. (Jesus Christ, what DOES Trump have on him?) If ANY of these chuckleheads had a spine, we'd see suspended campaigns suddenly coming back to life. "He's a convicted felon! I'm not!"

For my part, I had good champagne and a pizza.

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I had SO MANY CLIPS to choose from, it was hard to pare it down into a post that wouldn't exceed gmail's byte-count limit for emails

Susan P Thatcher's avatar

You could have a theme month with them.

Diana-Sedona's avatar

We popped a bottle too. The outpouring of the elected GOP (Gutless Opportunistic Parasites) on how this was β€œrigged” is mind boggling. A majority of this asshats have law degrees and yet they are shitting all over the justice system. They should all be forced to resign and have their law degrees pulled.

Susan P Thatcher's avatar

Working for Trump seems to be a sure way to lose your license

shee-rah's avatar

I think a lot of them are simply opportunists. They mimic Trump and suck up to him so that they aren’t ostracized from the Party. If they’re not sufficiently Trumpy, they’ll never win a Party nomination and receive campaign funds. And if they’re in a deep red district, they won’t win an election unless they kiss the ass of the Orange Jesus.

Susan Niemann's avatar

Good champagne and a pizza is an awesome combo! πŸ‘

Vickie Berry's avatar

A greater bottle of wine and a charcuterie board here. And, possibly too much wine! πŸ˜†

Darrell Smith's avatar

"Try to make a good impression" is right up there with Babe the Blue Ox as far as Trump is concerned. The social worker better be careful that he doesn't grab them by the...

One could search the world over and never find such a broken and rotting human as Trump. Many Supreme Court Justices and Republicans seem to be in competition with him, but there is really no contest.

How people can't get past "He's a good businessman" is beyond me.

Darrell Smith's avatar

"He has been fighting for the past 8 years". Fighting what? Golf balls? The coked up squirrels in his head? I can't type anymore, sorry. I am laughing too hard.

Bill Lawrence's avatar

He's unique: the only 'good businessman' in the universe who can't make a go of casinos.

Norma Frank's avatar

Yes! Even never-before-in-business Native Americans could make a fortune in casinos. Of course, DJT wasn’t trying to make money. He was trying to rip us all off.

SPW's avatar

He was washing Russian money and I believe close to getting discovered.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

He was laundering Russian, and organized crime money.

Morgan OCailleigh's avatar

You're assuming the social worker would be a woman.... I'd like to hear about CFLDFF grabbing a social worker's dick.πŸ™„πŸ€·β€β™€οΈπŸ™‚

Morgan OCailleigh's avatar

Convicted Felon Little Donny Fuck Face.....

Morgan OCailleigh's avatar

We have to put Convicted Felon before whatever we choose to call it!! 🀣

Susan Kemp's avatar

Maybe we should expand it to ARCFLDFF with the AR standing for adjudicated rapist.

JOEL's avatar

EVERYONE should write letters to Judge Merchan to respectfully urge him to sentence liar fraud con CONVICTED FELON Trump to serve time in prison!

Please do your part to make this happen!

Diana-Sedona's avatar

And it should include the same amount of solitary confinement as Michael Cohen’s confinement…51 days!!!

markwilson67's avatar

Although having him in an orange jumpsuit picking up trash on the side of the road as community service would be worth a few yucks.

Diana-Sedona's avatar

Or perhaps cleaning toilets in the park! πŸš½πŸ’©

Mary's avatar

Maybe hire the folks who took care of Jeffrey Epstein

Charles Austin's avatar

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

SuNew's avatar

Especially if we could hire that Tuba guy who harassed the Nazi march to follow him with an Oom-Pa-Pa soundtrack.

shee-rah's avatar

A kazoo orchestra would suffice if there’s a sufficient number.

Lynn Van Haren's avatar

That’s what I’d love to see

Rick Khamsi's avatar

What is Judge Merchan's mailing address at his workplace?

JOEL's avatar

Honorable Judge Juan Merchan

Supreme Court, New York County, Criminal Term

100 Centre Street

New York, NY 10013

Bill Lawrence's avatar

Yesterday was the first time in a long time I could think about Trump and smile. Broadly. And look at the riff-raff screaming obscenities because their orange idol finally got a comeuppance. But what really made me smile was the huge number of people who gathered outside Trump Tower chanting,

"New York hates Trump" over and over. I'm surprised Melania didn't lean out of her window and shout, "Me, too."

Diana-Sedona's avatar

We need to do that across the country! Thinking the orange πŸ’©β€™s birthday would be a good day!

markwilson67's avatar

A real Murderers' Row - Watters, Gutfield, Pirro, Vance - the list goes on and on and on. And the jokes almost write themselves. On the plus side, lying on various biz docs pales in comparison to keeping nuclear secrets in your bathroom after being told to give them back multiple multiple times.

Bill Lawrence's avatar

Too bad Trump's fangirl judge won't bring that case to trial in time for the election.

markwilson67's avatar

Speaking of slack-jawed yokels. At the risk of insulting yokels:-)

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

She's married to a mob lawyer .

David Olson's avatar

I should join the zeitgeist, Lock Him Up. But somehow having a convicted felon (and perhaps more to come) as a former President isn’t so cool. Watching a major political party shred its honor in its craven β€œloyalty” to such an imperfect man is sad. So yes let’s hear it for accountability and the rule of law, Hooray. The rest…

Cassandra Here's avatar

Yesterday, justice rolled down like waters. We’ve been living for almost a decade where shit has rolled down upon us. We’re traumatized by this bozo and his supporters in Congress.