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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit —

Donny announces he's going to give a speech about the Iran debacle tonight, and Wall Street predictably gets giddy with glee.

yup, this time Charlie Brown's gonna kick that football a fucking mile.

https://www.reuters.com/business/us-stock-futures-climb-iran-war-de-escalation-optimism-lifts-sentiment-2026-04-01/

arne link's avatar

Yep, more market manipulation means more money for the inside traders. Woo-Hoo.

Linda Weide's avatar

More money for the Trump FnF. Family and Friends.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

The Transnational Criminal Syndicate of billionaires cartel as well Linda.

rlritt's avatar

That's exactly it until the public get used to his idiotic back and forth and its baked into the markets.

Linda Weide's avatar

Malcolm Nance is having a watch party for those who are subscribed to his substack. He has predicted that Trump is either going to exit, or go in with ground forces, which he has been saying, as has everyone else in the know, is not a good idea. I will not be watching because I don't watch Trump talk, I just hear about it afterwards from people like Jeff.

My analysis is that all of the owners of big Tech companies are pressuring Trump to end this war right now, because Iran has threatened to blow up all of their headquarters in the Middle East if Trump attacks their energy infrastructure.

https://foreignpolicy.com/2026/03/31/iran-threat-us-tech-companies-irgc-hegseth-strait-hormuz-esfahan-oil-prices/

Iran has planned strategy for decades and updated to prepare for this war, and Trump has entered it on a greedy, grifting whim. NO KINGS, NO ICE, NOW WAR.

See this video. It is crazy ICE Taliban Christian Nationalist stuff. ICE Taliban. https://www.instagram.com/reels/DWj7hH9EU7R/

George in Atlanta's avatar

Tech companies are feeling some kind of way. That reminds me of a funny story from down here in the Peach State. Once upon a time, in a simpler and more innocent age, we had a governor who was staring at a bill to sign which would effectively un-person all gay people in the state and subject them to (more) harassment. The phone rang. On the line was the CEO from Home Depot or Delta Airlines or Coca Cola. The conversation was the same: "Nathan, boy, do yew have any IDEA how many of those folks drink our sugar water/fly our airplanes to Cancun/shop in our highly convenient stores? Now I'm *sure* you have the interests of our company's shareholders in mind as yew go signin' any of those bills. Have a nice day, now, you heah?"

The Governor in our tale promptly shit-canned the lunatics' bill. And that, Children, is how governance works here in America. The End.

Gently, Jack Jones's avatar

It’s all about the semolians!

George in Atlanta's avatar

You've got your moralities, pieties, and certainties about how the world should be. You've got economics. Economics wins.

Mike Hammer's avatar

A friend of mine in naval intelligence says a ground war has been planned for a long time. I hope he’s wrong, could be a geopolitical disaster.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

Standing down with that armada would be too much for Trump and Pete. They want to make a big bloody impression after Pete gave this his thoughts and prayers speech. I've seen and lived this shit in Vietnam. There is no glory.

Steve Kelly's avatar

This Vietnam Veteran agrees with you.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Who should we believe, Trump's words or our lying eyes? If troops are being sent to the middle east then we are heading for a ground war.

Jon Notabot's avatar

I think this is very accurate.

rlritt's avatar

Im not sure but dont they always plan to invade some unfriendly enemy just in case.

Monnina's avatar

Any ground war is a logistical nightmare and, as you write, will definitely be a geopolitical disaster. But when have the Trump Family, the # Maxwell-Epstein class and Maga loyalists ever delivered anything but financial crookery, global chaos and constitutional collapse ? What I am wondering is whether the war hawks and rapture fanatics at the Pentagon are going to be successful at pushing Trump into greenlighting deploying nukes against Iran.

Mike Hammer's avatar

He’ll say “It worked on Japan”.

Monnina's avatar

Fuck. He will. He will not be able resist.

Martha Howell's avatar

"I'm the first president since Truman! None of them had the courage before me!"

SeekingReason's avatar

There is a solution to this and it’s time it gets used.

SeekingReason's avatar

They did the coup so they should be forcibly removed! It’s disgusting how many crimes this admin commits then ignores subpoenas and the laws without consequence!

rlritt's avatar

Can someone fill me in because Im not a scientist, but wont nuclear bombs spread nuclear radiation? Won't that go into the ground and into the oil? Can they use oil that's radioactive? Or am I being completely stupid here?

rlritt's avatar

Think of the money to be made by the military industrial complex.

Martha Howell's avatar

They have all kinds of plans, for all kinds of contingencies, but leadership reviews the risks and potential rewards and makes an educated decision on...<runs out back to start digging a bomb shelter/>

William Burke's avatar

I think the manpower and seapower being dispatched to the Persian Gulf area is all about making a direct threat to invade Kharg Island - an invasion that would be tactically quite doable. At great human cost, of course, because Iranian drones would be swooping into Kharg Island like a heavy hatch of 17 year cicadas. In the end, I’ve concluded it’s largely just to put more pressure on the Iranians to cave. Given that 80 to 85% of the Iranian GDP accrues from oil exports, I don’t think the Iranian economy can sustain the effects of a closed Straight of Hormuz. Everyone, on all sides, understands this. It’s all performative. More kabuki Theatre.

Denise Donaldson's avatar

From what I read, Iranian oil IS getting through the Strait of Hormuz....?

Robert Eckert's avatar

The Iranians are now making money by extorting everyone else's oil tankers.

Leu2500's avatar

The Pentagon does a lot of planning for various wars, & not just during the felon's regime. Most never happen.

When you look back at the preparation for the 1st Gulf war, you'll see that this cluster is not how they plan/prepare.

MarciaMarciaMarcia's avatar

My guess for tonight’s bullshit will be 1) We won! It’s over! 2) Since we won, no boots on the ground (yes a waste of taxpayer money to get them there but no lives lost) and he’ll want everyone to now bow low to him and he’ll say he saved our economy even tho the stock market is not the economy 3) all other countries are on their own regarding the straight. All just my guess which really means nothing! I refuse to watch!

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

He is wrong. It could happen, but nothing Trump does is EVER "planned," except maybe his next golf weekend.

Linda Weide's avatar

You should watch Malcolm, Jacob and Wajeeh's daily briefs. They leave no doubt on why it would be a disaster. As Malcolm says, the body count would be unacceptably high.

Of course Hegseth would just say they are dying in glory as they fight the holy war he is not fighting in. It has been explained by Dean Blundell which of the New Apostolic Reclamation Seven Mountain Mandates this war meets, but I don't remember, just that it is kooky and horrid to do in the name of a charitable religion.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

That sounds more like the radical dean of women we had in high school. Girls sent home for too short skirts, spaghetti straps, patent leather deemed inappropriate, because boys might look up a girl’s skirt lol

Imagine kids today with those mandates😆

Paula Dean's avatar

In California, hard to believe but - I got sent home for wearing a split-skirt/culottes, even though they looked like a skirt with a pleat. And sent home because I wasn't wearing pantyhose with my open toed sandals. And sent home for dying my hair back to its natural color, after a disastrous adventure with "Summer Blonde". My mother stormed the principal's office after the haircolor brouhaha, and she was very not-sane-or-sober at the time. I wasn't there to see the scene she caused, but I can imagine. I became an object of pity after that, and learned the dress code(I was a new kid) so I would never make a mistake again.

Jeans weren't allowed until I was a senior.

Nancy's avatar

Summer Blonde! I remember it well. We were deluged with those commercials on tv.

I, too, was sent home in 7th grade for a hem too short. It was one of those “shirt dresses” and it had shrunk a bit.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

It turned my hair a garish reddish blonde. I use Colorsilk dark ash blonde now and get a much better result.

Sue's avatar

I was in 4th grade in a Catholic school a few months after the Beatles were on Ed Sullivan. You can imagine what the nuns thought of the Beatles and their hair. One nun, with a comb and a supply of bobby pins, more than once, rounded up the girls and boys in their respective bathrooms and proceeded to wet everyone's hair down and pin it to the top of their head - even bangs that were not longer than the eyebrows. I had an abusive father, but this particular nun caused me more PTSD than my father did with her many cruel antics, not just to me, but what I witnessed to other kids. All in the name of god!

Sue's avatar

Oh, and Go-Go Light was my go to hair color but never used it until high school.

Paula Dean's avatar

I've often wondered about those women who chose to become nuns...did they hate children because they couldn't have any?

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

You must've gone to high school when I did. Our one gym teacher was obsessed with culottes and especially culottes that LOOKED LIKE A SKIRT. She felt like you were deliberately trying to trick her. I never understood that because it looked like a skirt but was actually more modest.

Sandals were another anathema to her; she told my sister she would have fallen arches for wearing them. She also hated my sister's beatnik/hippe-style woven Greek bag and her SPU pin. I still have that SPU pin. (Student Peace Union, an early 60s precursor of the SDS.) Mrs. Feldman would have been alarmed at what my sister became! A campus radical, a law student, a public defender and now a retired advocate for the arts and Frank Lloyd Wright expert.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

I was a tad earlier — 68.

HP's avatar

Great story Paula. I went to a cult (SDA) boarding school. I was sent back to my room by teachers many times for rolling my skirt up so it was 2 inches above my knee. Those were the days…

arne link's avatar

We had one, too. They did force some people into decent behavior and appropriate dress choices. We learned not to go into an interview in flip flops and wife beater tee shirts.

Wendymae's avatar

The Ohio state house has already passed a bill that, per Andra Watkins, "gives any man the right to walk up to a woman in public, tell her she isn’t dressed appropriately, and charge her with the crime of indecent exposure." l'm surprised we haven't seen this on a national level yet.

The craziness is speeding up.

Lisa K. Obrien's avatar

Oh, I WISH an asshole would try that on me.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Ohioan here. Not really what that bill is about. It's a drag performance/ crossdressing ban that clandestinely aims at erasing and persecuting transgender people. It could have other unintended outcomes, including criminalizing a parent for taking their teenager to see Shakespeare's "As You Like It," but it's really an anti-trans measure. Because of course it is.

Sooz Hall's avatar

I have to confess that my reaction might be as I take the small knife out of my purse, “Are you sure that I’m a woman?”

But then at my age, I’m given to flights of fancy…

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

No, it's even more outrageous. It wants to destroy the drag scene across the state and erase transpeople.

Denise Donaldson's avatar

I realize that. But that's a whole different animal from men making citizens' arrests on random women.

Susan Sanders's avatar

I’d forgotten that they thought patent leather acted as a mirror. I was always in trouble for my short skirts, even when I explained that my mother hemmed them. I also got sent home for a granny dress (down to the ankles) because I looked different. That lesson stayed with me!

Paula Dean's avatar

That happened to me, too! It was an India print skirt, and I was pulled aside in the hall by the vice principal who told me that I was "an instigator" by dressing like a hippie.

Stephen Brady's avatar

In my Junior High School it became a fad for the boys to wear the tails of their button-down collar shirts outside their jeans... one day the principal lined us all up and paddled us in the front hallway of the school for this act of defiance.

Paula Dean's avatar

He'd be fired for that, now.

Miselle's avatar

⬆️‼️‼️😣

OMG Linda, that Instagram reel! I had not heard about this!

Miselle's avatar

Linda, in some respects, this is ALREADY in the US.

My daughter left our Catholic faith before she married, and she joined her husband's very legalistic Baptist church. Before they were married, she had to bring her wedding dress into the pastor so he could approve her dress. She got the dress for "free" from a woman who takes bridal dresses and makes them appropriate for "Christian Brides". This meant the strapless dress had a bodice with elbow length sleeves attached.

She wears skirts all the time, mostly ankle length. She never wears anything sleeveless. and the neckline MUST not be more than two fingerbreadths below her clavicle. Even my granddaughter has worn skirts her entire 6 hear life: although she wears leggings or bicycle shorts under them, they purchase clothes way too big for her so the skirt isn't "too long" and they safety pin the clothes to her.

I wonder if I'm the only person whose child rebelled by becoming super-morally-conservative?

I love my daughter but from what I've seen based on the few times I've been in the church and what she's said and her behavior, her church brainwashes their members. It breaks my heart as she was the one of my kids that I thought would attain the most --not financially, but who'd achieve the most success. She had all the elements to do so, in fact, she used to be very goal oriented, methodical an driven. This all got stamped out of her.

She is now employed by the university associated with her church. Their student handbook is online and their dress code reads like something in your links.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

There are ground troops on their way to the Middle East now. Following is an excerpt from Heather Cox Richardson March 31st newsletter:

"[T]he USS George H.W. Bush, left its home port, Naval Station Norfolk in Virginia, today to head in the direction of the Middle East, although it is not clear if it will support Operation Epic Fury. According to Alison Bath of Stars and Stripes, the carrier will pick up other elements of the carrier group, including the destroyers USS Ross, USS Donald Cook, and USS Mason, as it crosses the Atlantic. The George H.W. Bush Carrier Strike Group also includes several aircraft squadrons and detachments that make up the 70 or more aircraft in Carrier Air Wing 7, along with more than 5,000 sailors and military personnel.

Nearly 3,500 sailors and Marines from the Tripoli Amphibious Ready Group arrived in the region on Saturday."

Linda McCaughey's avatar

Wonder if Trump will meet them all when they return in body bags.

arne link's avatar

No, he doesn't even call the grieving families. He is such a pig.

Leu2500's avatar

he went to a couple recent dignified transfer ceremonies to get footage for his fundraising texts

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

Not if it interferes with this golf game.

Leu2500's avatar

so did the rain on 3/29

Nancy's avatar

Thanks for the link to the Instagram reel, Linda. That is some fucked up shit they’re doing at ICE detention centers. Not surprising (but infuriating) that DHS would figure out more ways to humiliate and harass immigrants and their families and deny them basic rights. 😤🤬

Theresa Palmer's avatar

You know trump breaks other peoples' stuff and walks away.

Either way this goes, he's still a fuck-up. All the rest of us are fed-up!

I feel sorry for the parents of the soldiers who have died for this insanity.

barb's avatar

Regarding the Instagram video, kudos to those kick ass volunteers who are outside that god awful detention ctr. concentration camp with bins of clothing for visitors.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Yesterday, Oracle (Trump’s besties the Ellisons) spared 20 to 30 thousand employees from getting blowed up real good by Iran. 🤦‍♂️

Julie's avatar

Iran blew up an Amazon cloud computing hub today.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Or he will claim within minutes that he doing six totally contradictory things.

Lori Painter's avatar

That video is heartbreaking and disgusting at the same time.

Major Kong's avatar

Trump will probably announce a cease fire.

Unity In Defiance's avatar

The 3 Ring Crime Syndicate continues… Insider trading? I’m old enough to remember Martha Stewart serving time over 45k…

Cathy Wray's avatar

I expect that was because she's a woman.

Tina Zep's avatar

I never really liked Martha. But when she was the only person convinced, I was pissed.

Leu2500's avatar

her broker & the company CEO, both male, were also convicted & served time.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Apparently he's also going to screw up the reflecting pool. Sure it's only one of THE most iconic parts of the national mall. Might as well knock over the Lincoln and Washington memorials while he's at it.

Beth's avatar

DON'T GIVE HIM IDEAS

arne link's avatar

Maybe turn it into a patio with umbrellas? You know, like the rose garden? Yeah, that's the ticket!

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Penis umbrellas to honor his sons & his cabinet

DuduLovesBubu's avatar

She-at, Let's add sum mud to that thar pool and bring on the swamp buggy races! Yee-Ha!

Suki Herr's avatar

Donald thinks he will intimidate. It’s not as if 6 justices don’t already agree with him.

Trump looks his age. Chances of his dozing off&snoring are very good.

Incontinence??

I won’t even bring up separation of powers.

Trump isn’t going to live forever. There’s a good chance (one way or the

Other) won’t serve out his term.

His 3 oldest children(felons)won’t have the protection of US citizens.

arne link's avatar

Six justices may agree with him, but I think taking away birthright citizenship will be a bridge too far. We are all immigrants, at some level. FFS, Trump's wife is an illegal immigrant. Why did they even accept this case?

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

ALL of Trump's children, with the exception of Tiffany, are Birthright Citizens. Ivana and Melania were not U.S. citizens when they had their kids.

The Supremely Corrupt Court Six will find a way to punt this back to the states.

Suki Herr's avatar

I hope you’re correct. 4 of Trump’s children should lose their protections granted to US citizens should this argument prevail.??

Suki Herr's avatar

After reading David Lat, I think I’m wrong on at least the 3 oldest Trump children.

I recommend reading David Lat.

Richard's avatar

I agree with you 100%!

Frank Nuts's avatar

I’m with you Arnie

RZolu's avatar

I was really really hoping for April 1st to be the day for the Big Beautiful Obituary...sigh...

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Oh, the agony of a speech

Thankfully, somebody else will watch it for us

Kim Steeves's avatar

Yes, thank God for Jeff, he will watch, listen, digest and then write what is really important, or what completely insane rabbit hole Preznut fell down!!

Thanks Jeff, for taking one for the team!!! We love you!!!

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Apparently Jews needn't tune in as many of us will be at the seder table for the first night of Passover. Stephen Miller or Jared couldn't tell him?

Jon Notabot's avatar

All I've learned over the past stupid decade is this: when Trump speaks, bad things happen - particularly when it's a formal announcement.

Lynn Van Haren's avatar

How many times is Wall Street going to fall for this shit? Iran isn’t even talking to Donny or his representatives! Watch what they DO, not what they SAY

Kim Steeves's avatar

It's not so much "fallen for" it's how many times can they rig the market to buy low, sell high! Over and over again.

Barbara Ferrara's avatar

I heard he’s going to announce we’re leaving NATO but I thought he couldn’t do that. Also, Penn should not even know who on campus is Jewish. Why would they have that info? Is it faculty, staff, AND students? If it has to do with antisemitism I’m sure Philadelphia police can make arrests. I seem to remember their police chief saying “don’t bring that sh*t here.”

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

I see where he demanded 20 minutes from broadcast outlets but I expect at least an hour of contradictory, incoherent babbling. Let me know. I won't be watching it. I have to play with my cats.

Julie's avatar

Somehow I missed his “speech”. 🤢. It took me 25 minutes to read today’s missive because of literally CRYING with laughing and having to wipe the tears of hilarity away that were making it hard to continue. Another total masterpiece.

Maggie&Lefty's avatar

Yeah.. whatever, doofus !!!

George A. Polisner's avatar

Thank you Jeff.

I'm old enough to remember when all the social discussion was around the Epstein-Trump-Maxwell files and Pam "Bribe Me" Bondi's refusal to comply with the Transparency Act signed into law last year.

Does anyone remember all that?

Linda Weide's avatar

Unfortunately it all seems to be tied into this war. According to Zev Shalev there are ties.

Carol C's avatar

Last year was soooo long ago. I love your witty “I’m old enough to remember when,” George.

George A. Polisner's avatar

Thank you Carol -and that phrase is borrowed from others. But I’m old enough to not remember where I saw it first. :)

Sooz Hall's avatar

‼️👏🏻😂❤️‼️👏🏻🤣❤️‼️

Frank Nuts's avatar

You’re right George. There’s an awful lot of wag the dog going on

George A. Polisner's avatar

The good news is with technology and data centers -we can track almost all of the crimes and corruption (that we are aware of, so far) simultaneously.

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

The idea that this administration can get a list of Jewish people at Penn is positively bone-chilling. And it won’t stop with Penn.

Mary Greenwald's avatar

Then the old and infirm. Trump better get a pass on that one!!

SeekingReason's avatar

No problem…He’s 6’3” and 185 lbs…Haven’t you heard? 🙄🤥🤥🤥🤥

arne link's avatar

Sadly, probably true.

Suzeebee's avatar

This is a deeply antisemitic administration using Jews as a means to an end. It Will gleefully discard us when not needed anymore. Very chilling.

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Yes, because if they really cared about Jews, they’d denounce the Proud Boys, Oath Keepers and all of the other Neo-Nazis (aka “very fine people”) who make up the MAGA base.

Stephen Schiff's avatar

They are just following the historical precedent of the Nazis who early on supported the Zionists but changed their minds because most German Jews thought of Deutschland as their Heimat. I suspect this is also the case at present (But wish that American Jews would be willing to give some tough love to Israel.)

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

I’m an American Jew, and I’d love to see Israel get some tough love. Bibi is their version of Trump—a far right wing nut who’s only in office to stay out of prison.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

It's a test balloon to see if he can get away with it. Apparently he can.

Susie's avatar

Bone-chilling is the perfect descriptor. 😡🤬

2Cats2Furious's avatar

Also, how will Penn even know which of its students and faculty are Jewish? I’ve never seen any secular organization keep track of its members’ religion. Even Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) self-identification surveys don’t track religion, although they include information on other protected characteristics like race and ethnicity.

Is Penn supposed to base the list on last names (“sounds Jewish”)? Membership in affinity groups? A survey to all students and faculty asking them to disclose whether they are Jewish?

Horrible on so many levels.

rlritt's avatar

Why are they doing this?

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Apparently to investigate antisemitism. I don’t buy it.

Miselle's avatar

Someone correct me if I'm wrong.....isn't it reported that Elon was technically here illegally? And HOW many kids has he spawned?

Sperrett's avatar

Elon and Melania both were illegal aliens for a while before they were allowed to buy citizenship. It’s still not clear which planet they came from.

Frank Nuts's avatar

I have that answer for you Sperrett: they come from the planet Grifter Centurion 5 in the Blow Me constellation. They are well respected there

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

Hell....#Bumblefuck's MOTHER was an illegal.

When her VISITOR'S VISA expired, she DUCKED OUT of going back to Scotland (her FIRST offense), then started work as a CLEANING WOMAN....*W/OUT A WORK VISA* (her SECOND offense). Of course, then she met Daddy GotBucks, married him, & achieved her ULTIMATE goal....to SNAG A RICH AMERICAN MAN.

Freud would have had a fucking FIELD DAY w/ this douchenozzle:

• Mommy was an immigrant

• I love Mommy, & she loves me

• Mommy sent me away because I'm a juvenile delinquent dickhead who's upsetting her "SOCIAL REPUTATION"

• Should I still love Immigrant Mommy? Does she still love me, or NOT?

• Part of me still wants Mommy to love me....so I'll marry TWO illegal immigrants & MAKE THEM love me

• But, Mommy was an illegal immigrant, & since she REJECTED me....I HATE IMMIGRANTS!

Since there's no actual PHOTO of what's happening inside the remnants of #Bumblefuck's screwed up, pea-sized brain, all I have is this:

🤯👹🍼🍪😭🤬

Frank Nuts's avatar

Ouch Miselle! That stung! Someone gonna be butthurt

Carol C's avatar

Technicalities are getting many people into ICE custody.

Kim Nesvig's avatar

But wait! Trump is upset by birthright citizenship because he prefers to sell citizenship to the highest bidders.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Kim, I see what you did there and I’m down with it!

SethTriggs's avatar

Oh gee, looks like America's Pilonidal Cyst is oozing again!

But we get to be the gauze pack and antiseptic this fall and remove some of the power of his ethnonationalist, racist, transnational criminal syndicate. Make sure your voter registration is active and jump your voter suppression hoops NOW so you're not caught out in the fall.

Mount up and Don't Give Up the Ship!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Good post Seth. You always make me look up words and get smarter but Pilonidal Cyst is a term I won’t mind forgetting; but, I must admit, it’s a very accurate and descriptive term for describing the orange Tasmanian devil

Cathy Wray's avatar

Ok, Frank, now I have to look up that word.😜

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

"America's Pilondial Cyst"....

I'm laughing so hard, I'M IN PAIN HERE!!! 🤣🤣🤣

Leu2500's avatar

re Chinese Billionaires. I have a faint memory from the first term. someone in the Kushner family was pitching how "Chinese Billionaires" could get in the US long-term. Was it buying a visa? Was it coming here to have their baby, who would have birth right citizenship?

And then there's a flourishing trade, including in the felon's FL condos, of Russians buying property & having their children here, so they have birthright citizenship.

Every damn thing he says is a confession.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Right Leu—he’s bypassing doing catholic confessions by just blurting out his crimes in public and the press is like: “ well, he said it in public. He’s not hiding it sooo…I guess that makes it ok?”

WTF press—jump on that clown and ride him like a little pony. That’s your job! Don’t just say “Oh well”. Do your job!

rlritt's avatar

The very Chinese do have birthing centers in CA for this reason.

Liz and Max the No. 1 Cat's avatar

I'm not a lawyer, and I'm definitely not a Constitutional scholar, but if the 14th Amendment was supposed to only apply to the babies of slaves, it would have said so. The people who wrote it weren't stupid, unlike Donnie. It says, ALL people born in the US or subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens. And the Supreme Court already ruled on this in the 1800s. A Chinese man born here of immigrant parents sued and the Supreme Court affirmed that ALL persons means ALL persons. Of course, I assume that the people arguing against Donnie's stupid interpretation are smarter than me and will make that argument.

Leu2500's avatar

there's a major precedent on birthright citizenship & it has to do with an Asian-American. The Chinese Exclusion Act, etc refused American citizenship for Chinese (& maybe other Asian) immigrants. But the CHILD of one sued for being refused reentry into the US, or owning property, or something on the grounds that by birth he was an American citizen. And SCOTUS ruled in his favor.

So no, it doesn't just apply to former slaves.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Ya Liz, I thought the cool conservative judges were “originalists” when it came to the constitution — you know: “it says what it says”. Amazing how they bend the constitution to fit their narrative

Liz and Max the No. 1 Cat's avatar

Oh, I think we all know they're only "originalists" when it suits their agenda.

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

Like this is a SURPRISE??

Al S's avatar

...and the bible.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Thank you! I did forget that. Any bible will do. Blank pages are acceptable. If there are pictures let there be little ones in compromising positions or ones of things blowing up. And then I think we are good to go

BluDotInARedSewer's avatar

Well, we all know that the supremes don’t respect previous rulings. see dobbs vs roe v wade. 🤬

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

And SCOTUS should get ready for Donny’s visit today by providing him with his own special chair, blanket, pillow and can of Lysol.

arne link's avatar

Oh, Lord how I hope his intestines malfunction while he's there. All the stimulants in the world won't keep him awake. Lawfare is slow and boring and there is no musical score.

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

He’ll provide both the musical score and aromatherapy.

arne link's avatar

Oh, God! A one-man band? That is comedy gold right there. Thank you for making me laugh out loud this morning.

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

You make me LOL quite often!

HI2thDoc's avatar

I’m sure SCOTUS will have the ventilation system maxed out for his usual noxious emanations

Dave Drell's avatar

Gas masks provided by Ace Hardware

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Leu2500's avatar

Cspan broadcast the audio of oral arguments live. So you can go back & see if you hear him sharting.

Frank Nuts's avatar

And Arne, no photos of things blowing up

john augustine's avatar

don't forget the binky

Frank Nuts's avatar

You’re readin my mail John. There are a lot of like minds here aren’t there?

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

The big gold toilet throne on the mall should work fine, since droopy faced Roberts made him a King. They deserve each other,.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Come on Steph — don’t forget the binky!

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

The National Mall needs a statue of a giant gold binky!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Make it so Steph! I don’t like it—I LOVE IT!

HI2thDoc's avatar

Them fun, fun Noems

Keep inspiring poems

Turns out Bryon’s fetish

Is acting coquettish

With fake boobs that look like domes

Dave Drell's avatar

fetish- coquettish….💋loving it!

HI2thDoc's avatar

I had no choice. Couldn’t find any other words that rhyme

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Jane's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

Deborah Arapa's avatar

🤞his liarbry is built over a traditional Florida sinkhole.

Cessna Bob's avatar

What's all the fanfare about building the Trump Library in Florida?? it should only take

15 minutes to throw together a bonfire!

Marie Drozdis's avatar

Trump Library and Lap-Dance Casino.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Filled with copies of Art of Deal. And Epstein files.

Frank Nuts's avatar

And the rest of the top secret files he kept

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

I was wondering why #Bumblefuck needed a big rip-off of the World Trade Center to house his "library" - a partially colored-in coloring book, & his annotated, bedside table copy of "Mein Kampf".

Frank Nuts's avatar

Chefs 💋 Lin (I’m not gay). But if you’re gay I’m ok with that. I better stop talking before I dig a hole so deep I can’t get out.

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

I'm an old, married female, so I'm not where "gay" enters into this.

Having said that, I have no problem w/ other people's inclinations. I have family & friends who are gay, trans, or etc, & I accept them all. ❤️

SeekingReason's avatar

👍🏼👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Neal Stiffelman's avatar

I’m changing outta my hip waders and into the full diving bell regalia. This shit is getting DEEP.

Mark Slattery's avatar

I see a marketing campaign for a Mexican or Tex Mex restaurant: EPIC TACO

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣‼️

Fred's avatar

We have a war going on that he started without consulting Congress and our allies and now he’s at the Supreme Court trying to overthrow another part of the Constitution. Just a normal day in his miserable life and our existence with this shit show

Cathy Wray's avatar

OMG, I hope he's dead soon.

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

So Kristi Noem’s husband was caught

Wears enormous fake boobs, and she’s fraught!

“I knew not one whit about it”

Oh right, yeah, I doubt it

She can lie and deceive, but for naught.

It’s actually really quite sad

That the ones who preach hate are so mad

They pretend that they’re pure

And they’re so goddamn sure

“Hey! Everyone else is so bad!”

The hypocrisy’s second to none

While Noem poses with all sorts of guns

Putting innocents down

With a smile, not a frown

Have ya learned anything? It ain’t fun!!

arne link's avatar

Why do all these fake Christians have sexual kink in their background? It's so predictable.

Steph's avatar

one might even say, ironic

rlritt's avatar

Its because they repress sexuality, it manifests in weird ways.......not that there is anything wrong with alternate sexual expression.

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

That's true. Very true.

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

That's a good question. I think it's because they try to bury it because it's so shameful to them and it eventually explodes in their faces.

Dave Drell's avatar

Frosty gave us 3 today - as good as a

a triple-decker BLT!!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Another good one Frosty!