Trump lawyer Todd Blanche fucks up bigtime during closing statements
Trump lawyer Todd Blanche fucks up bigtime during closing statements
Team Trump continues to be its own worst enemy
yesterday, during the defense’s summation in the Big Trump Campaign Finance Fraud Fuckery trial, Trump lead lawyer Todd Blanche took his Italian-leather-clad foot and shoved it right into his big stupid mouth.
Before the lawyers depart, Judge Merchan strongly tells Todd Blanche that he doesn’t think it was an accident when Blanche told the jury that the jury should think twice before “sending a man to prison.”
Merchan to Blanche: Your statement was “outrageous” and “highly inappropriate.” /
Merchan’s tone was tempered but you could tell he was angry with Blanche. Merchan noted that Blanche’s experience as a federal prosecutor suggests that this was no accident on his part.
holy shit, did Blanche just threaten the jury? did he actually tell the jurors to “think twice” before sending his mobster client to prison?
it sure as fuck sounds like a threat. no wonder Judge Merchan was pissed.
Donny and his lawyers have done everything they could to annoy Merchan during the entire month-long trial. this is going to result in a twenty-megaton disaster for Trump should the jury return a guilty verdict. here’s why: it’s up to Merchan whether he shows leniency towards Trump — or throws the fucking book at him.
as ludicrous as it seems to type these words, Donny is technically a first-time offender for what is essentially a low-level white-collar crime.
Trump’s 34 charges are all class E felonies — the lowest class of felony in the state of New York
had Donny been a contrite defendant who owned up to his crimes and shown genuine remorse for his wrong-doing — or at the very least just behaved like a human being in the courtroom — Merchan would most likely give him a slap on the wrist. pay a fine, maybe a little probation, and probably nothing more.
but Trump, of course, was a disrespectful disaster from the word go. sleeping in court, refusing to stand up when the jury entered the courtroom, moaning and sighing during the trial, multiple violations of the gag order, and on and on — finally culminating in Todd intimidating the jury during closing remarks.
if the jury returns a guilty verdict, don’t expect any mercy from Merchan. Donny could end up on the wrong end of a prison sentence.
once again, Donald Trump will have made things worse for himself — because he’s a toxic narcissist with the impulse control of a coked-up squirrel.
good. this couldn’t happen to a more deserving bag of shit.
it’s always a clownshoes spectacle outside the courthouse, and yesterday was no exception.
oh look — Donny finally got some protestors to show up.
look at these tarted-up weirdos. so, Q-Anon Shaman cosplay is now a thing? bear in mind that these are the same halfwits who throw a shit-fit if a drag performer reads a book to children.
speaking of children, look who showed up at the trial yesterday: Eric, Lara, Don Jr. and even Tiffany. but uh-oh, her demented dipshit father didn’t seem to know who she was and walked right past her.
wait a minute — let’s zoom in on the back of Trump’s big dumb pumpkin head.
holy shit! what in the small-batch artisanal fuck is going on with Trump’s hair? is he tying it together in the back so it doesn’t escape?
I’ve never seen anyone get this much scalp coverage out of eighteen strands of hair.
here’s the library-paste-eating son, committing the Freudian slip of the century.
“I cannot wait for the day that we win. we will. we’re white.”
whaaat? yeah, we know, Eric — you meant to say ‘right.’ but somehow, the truth always manages to rise to the surface.
hey Eric — New York has a message for you.
“fuck you, Eric — and fuck your father.”
Individual-1 Junior also took a turn in front of the mic.
“the President of the United States is not allowed to exercise his First Amendment rights in New York City in this day and age.”
Cokey McSniffles seems a little confused. no one in New York City is infringing the President of the United States’ First Amendment rights. Joe Biden can say anything he wants.
oh hey, Don Jr. got the same New York welcome as his brother.
“fuck you, Don Junior — and fuck your father.”
but you know who wasn’t there to show support? Melania. really weird how she won’t show up at the trial that centers on her husband cheating on her with a porn actress while she was home with baby Barron.
the Biden campaign did a very smart thing yesterday: they sent Robert De Niro down to the courthouse to take his own “guerilla style” turn in front of the microphones.
“and that’s why it’s so weird that Donald Trump is just across the street — because he doesn’t belong in my city. I don’t know where he belongs, but he certainly doesn’t belong here. we New Yorkers used to tolerate him when he was just another grubby real estate hustler masquerading as a big shot. a two-bit playboy lying his way into the tabloids … a clown. this city is pretty accommodating. we make room for clowns.”
De Niro also said Trump should be in prison.
Mr. De Niro — in an off-script moment — declared that Mr. Trump was guilty and should go to jail.
“The fact is whether he’s acquitted, whether it’s hung jury, whatever it is, he is guilty, and we all know it,” the actor said after the news conference, as a rowdy group of Trump supporters confronted him and yelled insults before he left. “I’ve never seen a guy get out of so many things, and we all know this. Everybody in the world knows this.”
Asked if he thought Mr. Trump should be in jail, Mr. De Niro replied: “I sure do. Absolutely.”
this caused the whole wingnutsphere to melt straight down into a puddle of outrage. the dipshits who have spent eight years yelling LOCK HER UP at the email lady fell all the fuck over their fainting couches. how dare De Niro demand prison for Dear Leader?
everybody got into the act — from Jeanine the Drunk Judge, who demanded to know what De Niro has done for New York City —
to weird face-drawn-on-a-thumb Trump toady Jason Miller, who called De Niro a “washed-up actor.”
boo fucking hoo, crybabies. here’s your binky.
as for Donald Trump, he continues to be his own worst enemy.
here he is, rage-posting on his shitty app at 12:20 last night:
“CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT I, AS A DEFENDANT, AM NOT ALLOWED TO REBUT OR CORRECT THE MANY LIES TOLD DURUNG THE 5 HOUR FILIBUSTER JUST PUT ON BY THE SOROS BACKED D.A.’s OFFICE IN THE MANHATTAN COURT. WHAT A DISGRACEFUL PERFORMANCE OF MISREPRESENTATION IT WAS!!! MAGA2024”
yes, dumb-ass, we can imagine a criminal defendant not being allowed to stand up and whine like a dirty diaper baby in the middle of the prosecution’s summation — because we’re not TOTAL FUCKING IDIOTS who refuse to understand how trials work.
you had your chance to testify last week — and you ran and hid like the cowardly weasel you are.
how about you lay off the midnight adderall binges and go the fuck to bed. no wonder you nod off in court every single day, enveloped in a pungent haze of your own fecal stench.
don’t you want to be awake to hear your guilty verdict?
a personal note: the last time I took a day off from doing this thing was one year ago today, on May 29, 2023. today is the 366th consecutive day that I’ve published a post. I know I’ll probably take another break eventually, but for now I’m just going to keep on keeping on. thank you all for being here, and coming along for the ride.
Very grateful for your sanity-preserving, thought-provoking, super-adjective-laced consecutive streak @JeffTiedrich!
The Jury's Up
_______
The Trump trial has reached its fever pitch, a climax of raw, unfiltered testimony that's left the jury reeling. For five weeks, they've been bombarded with the sordid details of Trump's hush-money scheme, a twisted tale of deceit and betrayal that's enough to make even the most hardened cynic blush.
.
Trump's team, with their silver tongues and slick suits, tried to spin a yarn about their client being the hapless victim of a bitter ex-employee, Michael Cohen. They painted a picture of a president too engulfed in the chaos of his own making to notice the details of the scheme. But anyone with half a brain could see through their flimsy defense.
.
The prosecutors, on the other hand, didn't hold back. They spent six relentless hours laying bare the ugly truth of Trump's deceit. They exposed how he falsified business records to cover his tracks, how he repaid Cohen for the $130,000 hush payment to Stormy Daniels, all to smother the scandal before the 2016 election. By the time they rested their case at 8 PM, the jury was left with the weight of history on their shoulders.
.
The defense tried to smear Cohen as a venomous liar, out for blood. They called his testimony a twisted fairy tale, suggesting doctored evidence and deceit. But their arguments were as flimsy as a house of cards in a hurricane.
.
Prosecutor Joshua Steinglass, in a masterclass of legalese and plain talk, zeroed in on the smoking gun – a document detailing the repayment plan to Cohen. He scoffed at the defense's claim that Trump was too busy with the affairs of state to notice the payments. He drove the point home: Trump, the self-proclaimed frugal micromanager, knew exactly where every dollar went.
.
The case wasn't about Cohen's vendetta, Steinglass argued, but Trump's blatant falsification of business records. Cohen was merely a guide, leading the jury through the labyrinth of Trump's deceit.
.
The jury now holds the gavel, the final arbiters of justice in this sordid drama. Trump's guilt is as clear as the cold, hard facts – and now it's time for the hammer to fall. The curtain's up on the final act, and the world is watching with bated breath to see if justice will be served and I'm betting the jury will vote guilty by Monday. They're not a bunch of wide-eyed rubes fresh off the turnip truck, these are smart, savvy New Yorkers who can smell a long con from a mile away
.
Trump may have thought he could pull the wool over their eyes with his slick lawyers and his smoke and mirrors, but these jurors are cut from a different cloth. They're the kind of people who know that if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
.
They've sat through five weeks of this circus, watching as the prosecution peeled back the layers of Trump's deceit like an onion, exposing the rot at the core. They've heard the testimony, seen the evidence, and now they're ready to render their verdict.
.
I've got a feeling that come Monday, the hammer of justice is going to come down hard on Donald Trump. These jurors have had enough of his lies, his scheming, and his blatant disregard for the law. They're going to send a message that no one, not even a former president, is above the law.
.
So .buckle up, buttercups, because the final act of this drama is about to unfold, and it's going to be a doozy. The jury's got the power now, and they're not afraid to use it. Trump may have thought he was untouchable, but he's about to find out that in the city that never sleeps, justice never rests. The reckoning is coming, and it's going to be a sight to behold.
@Gloria Horton-Young