this week in stupid: May 26 edition

Marge gets large, Ron gets gone, and so much more ...

as another stupid week comes to a close here in America, let’s look back at some of the highlights.

sunday: can’t you feel the DESANTISMENTUM

oh my god, Ron DeChickenfucker is so goddamn awful at campaigning. he lacks any basic ability to form a connection with actual human beings.

here’s Ron stopping at a diner to rub elbows with potential voters — the kind of bread-and-butter thing that even folks running for dogcatcher instinctively know how to navigate.

“what’s your name?”
“I’m Tim.”
“ok.”

brilliant. just brilliant.

keep fucking that chicken, Ron. it’s what you’re good at.

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monday: what in the actual fuck is this

holy shit. what in the actual fucking fuck is going on inside this guy’s head?

one thing’s for certain: when the Mannequin Apocalypse comes, our man here is going to be ready.

except not really. I love that he can’t properly holster or draw his weapons. he keeps fumbling around.

when the shit hits the fan, this guy is going to end up mannequin food.

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tuesday: Nazi Mom gets poem banned, gets exposed as Nazi Mom

here’s Nazi Mom with former Proud Boy and current federal inmate Enrique Tarrio. the company you keep, am I right?

what a lovely self-own. Daily Salinas could have kept her bigoted mouth shut, and right now she’d just be some unknown dipshit mom. but she had to whine about the poem ‘The Hills We Climb’ (which was recited by Amanda Gorman at Joe Biden’s inauguration) and get it banned from her local library. and that’s when the fun started.

folks started looking into who Daily Salinas is, and it turns out she’s a fucking Nazi. and now the whole world knows it. good job outing yourself, moron.

here’s a link to Amanda Gorman’s “The Hills We Climb.” please buy a copy for every schoolkid you know and make a Nazi cry.

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wednesday: all hail Congresswoman Marjorie Laughingstock Sporkfoot

Marge! so good to see you here on ‘this week in stupid’ yet again. tell us, what lighthearted hijinks have you gotten into now? what’s that? Kevin let you play with his gavel again? and you tried to call the House to order? tell us, how did that go?

what’s that you say? just play the video and see for ourselves? roger that, Marge.

oh dear. oh dear.

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thursday: Stewart Rhodes plays stupid games, wins stupid prizes

Stewart Rhodes, the Oath Keeper who shot himself in the eye, is now also the Oath Keeper who shot himself in the foot.

arrested for his part in planning in January 6 insurrection, Rhodes did everything he could to make things worse for himself. during the trial, he showed no remorse and loudly declared himself to be a political prisoner who would do it all again if he were given the chance.

the judge rewarded him with an 18-year prison sentence.

and when all is said and done, what’s stupider than going to jail for Donald Trump?

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friday: ?

hey, it’s still morning as I sit here writing this. but give it time, I guarantee you that some dipshit wingnut is going to do something stupid before the day is over. you can set your watch to it.

have a non-stupid weekend, everyone.

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