252 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

me, I prefer funny weeks to angry weeks, but one has no choice but to play the hand one is dealt

nkrempa's avatar

When you live in Donnie's "land of confusion," you're right. No choice but to roll with it.

Julie's avatar

I’m fucking pissed every day. And more and more frightened that this fucking idiot is ruining the world economy and doesn’t care and is going to get us all killed. Today the WH is blocking and suppressing warnings of possible terror attacks HERE on citizens. And last night this fucking idiot and Kegbreath launched strikes in Ecuador. I appreciate anger and passion. And Jeff, your takes are the ONLY thing that cut through the bullshit and afford us any laughter. And my heart aches for you every day for the loss of Ms. Spouse and her creative energy, fun sense of humor, and your life together. I remain grateful for you and so sorry for your loss.

Megan Ross's avatar

I'm right there with you, Julie. I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore! I've had bad dreams of doing great bodily harm to you-know-who, and every member of his Clown Car Cabinet.

Steph Frye's avatar

You and me both, Megan! Every.single.day.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

You really need to make those dreams come true Megan, you deserve this!

CAM from 🇨🇦's avatar

Julie, thank you for your post. I hope that it brings Jeff a small reprieve from the sorrow that has befallen him since his wife’s untimely passing.

Julie's avatar

My heart hurts for him every day. It’s a gut-wrenching loss. And we all just love him. I hope we can give back with our comments and our appreciation and support.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Well said Julie. I think we all feel that way

Denise Hall's avatar

Me too Mr tiedrich 💖

Skepticat's avatar

I'm more concerned about his out-of-control dementia.

Paula Dean's avatar

Seriously! Whatever the many causes may be, it's the current condition that his "stable genius brain" is in that concerns us ALL - as in: the ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET! He can't express a coherent thought...his mind has left the building! And what cocktail of drugs is his "team" flooding his failing body with? I'd like to see the list so I know what to 'just say no" to.

Sometimes, just for shits and giggles, I watch videos of him stumbling over his own tongue, feet, words, etc.,but I pretend it's Biden, or Obama, or even JFK... any politician who I loved and respected. I ask myself: "Hey, Self - could I ignore such glaring insanity and incompetence in my favorite leaders?"

The answer is no. The first sentence Joe Biden spoke during the infamous debate with tRump filled me with horror and despair. So, I really do not understand how anyone - no matter how loyal - can possibly ignore tRump's descent into dementia.

rlritt's avatar

It isn't a glitch. Its part of the plan. He distracts. And Bondi, Voight and Miller dismantle Democracy.

Skepticat's avatar

It isn't a glitch; it's a freaking disaster, but not planned—he's just stripped down to the bare bones of what he actually always has been.

Cathy Wray's avatar

Oh, so true!! Very scary!! Domestic terrorists!!!

Bob Bowden's avatar

You believe in something that’s completely foreign to them: Basic Minimum STANDARDS

Malcolm Maremont's avatar

I'm less concerned about his dementia than the fact that REPUBLICANS WILL DO NOTHING ABOUT IT!

Megan Ross's avatar

I'm equally concerned about both!

Megan Ross's avatar

Me too. Plus, I think TRump suffers from syphilis, which has obviously attacked his brain. 😳

Cathy Wray's avatar

Rotting his brain, or what's left of it.

Ellen McKenzie's avatar

Isn’t it the late stage syphilis causing his dementia? I mean; he could also have other “conditions” as they aren’t mutually exclusive!

HI2thDoc's avatar

Damn, I hope not. He coulda given poor Stormy an STI.

Morgan's avatar
3hEdited

Not likely. Trump's father had Alzheimer's, and there's a known genetic risk. Also, his lifestyle includes everything we are told NOT to do for brain health - he's an obese rage-a-holic, on a junk food diet, who never exercises his body or mind and rage-tweets at night.

They wouldn't be giving him MRIs at 6 month intervals if they thought it was syphilis. Only an autopsy can diagnose Alzheimer's with certainty, but I have no doubt that will prove to be what it is in the end.

Joyce's avatar

I suspect that he's a reported germaphobe because he's already a walking Petri dish and doesn't want to add to his internal collection.

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

He is pretty bad even without all the outlying shit. What an ick.

Julie's avatar

He’s in good company. Henry VIII, Columbus, and George Custer all died of syphilis. And they lost their damn minds from it, too.

Ellen McKenzie's avatar

George Custer died of bullet wounds at the Battle of Little Bighorn.

Tess's avatar

makes me sick of their treatment of trans PEOPLE….plus Kegstand himself makes me sick….ARGH

DJ Headthrob's avatar

It's NOT Herpes. It's clearly either leprosy or an infected Stephen Miller hickey.

Bob's avatar

Aces and 8s for America.

Paula Dean's avatar

I had to look this up. "Dead man's hand", definitely appropriate. ☠️

Frank Nuts's avatar

You’re right Bob. It’s not looking good (I guess that’s an understatement)

myhoopbabies's avatar

Jeff, you make every week a funny week and we love you for it. It would be even funnier if it wasn't real life, but here we all are.

Renee's avatar

I read a substack today that pointed out that the U.S. is now a gangster state. We are bringing death and destruction to the world & home.

Walt Svirsky's avatar

Hi Jeff, the blurbs you post from FAUX News are simply unwatchable. I know there is humor behind your decision to use those clips, but, I can’t go 10 seconds without reaching for the mute button. It reminds me of how absolutely fucking stoopid someone has to be to watch that shit all day long…and, of course, they pump it straight onto our military bases.

Facts, how do they work?

Jean Jacoby's avatar

Remember, Elon is working on that neuroimplant, which will allow this stuff to be pumped directly into those stooooopid brains without TVs or smartphones.

Gail (Chicago)'s avatar

Make America Brainwashed Again!

Mark Slattery's avatar

When decent people fuck up, they try to do what they can to unfuck it. Trump's strategy is to distract from a fuck up by committing another fuck up, followed be another fuck up to distract from the new fuck up, etc, etc.

That's pretty fucked up.

Lucius's avatar

Fractal fuckups.

Bob Bowden's avatar

The Scandalbrot Set

Lucius's avatar

Multiplanar mistakes

Leu2500's avatar

Russian nesting dolls of distraction.

Michael Johnson's avatar

Matrioshki. Or "Matrёshki"

K Pop's avatar

In future history books, I hope this will be the introductory paragraph to the section on the Trump era!

Martha Howell's avatar

"future history books" You're making a big leap there, assuming there are survivors of this time line.

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Martha, Assuming we have a future, better reread the article. I admit to not memorizing the Bible but did it say Armageddon would signal a second coming? That just doesn’t equate to the good news. Just an observation but dopey don already speaks in tongues so why hire the washed up hag to do it? I think she is saying ‘What the fuck is wrong with you dopey?’ How would we know for sure?

Cyndi's avatar

The thing about Armageddon thinking is that the "Rapture" would rid the world of all these nutcases if and only if they are recognized as "Christians" by their god.

Can you imagine what they would be like after they were left behind?

Bob Bowden's avatar

The aliens will get here, dig through the rubble and learn what happened, look at each other and say, “We arrived too late.”

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

When speaking in tongues is an accepted form then you know we're close to turning this planet over to the roaches Martha

Jan Moon's avatar

Sad thing is there is no one . . . NO ONE . . . who has the gumption to call him on even ONE of these fuck ups. The whole world is laughing its ass off and the press corps, congress, the entire cabinet, and all Dumbfuck's followers are watching him with their thumbs firmly implanted where the sun don't shine. I just don't get it.

Mingo's avatar

Instead of calling this war that's not a war Epic Fury, it should be called Epic Fuck Up. We all now have targets on our backs thanks to the spineless sycophants that call themselves republicans.

Mark Slattery's avatar

Good name. Operation Epic Fuck Up to distract from the Trump-Epstein Pedo Files

Frank Nuts's avatar

True Mark but it does seem to work for him. He never really gets busted for anything. It must be exhausting constantly trying to think up new fires to start while the last ones are still blazing. I guess that’s why he sleeps through all his meetings.

There’s got to be a good dominatrix out there with an acceptable ball gag that could slow him down long enough to bust him for all the crap he’s already done.

Here’s what I’m worried about — the day is coming soon when he will be nonverbal and drooling on his red tie and Big Mac and the red republicans will be demanding sympathy for his highness in his distressed state. And I will beg to disagree. Dog piling is in order. Scratch that — how bout some lion piling. Let’s plop him in the middle of a bunch of lions at the Bronx Zoo. We don’t even have to throw him in there— we’ll just put down cheeseburgers every 5 feet or so leading right through the open door of the lion exhibit and we’ll close the door behind him. We’ll sell in person tickets and we’ll sell world wide closed circuit viewing of the event. We could probably pay off the national debt that he’s been actively adding to.

At the very least, we’ll get rid of our acid indigestion.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️

Tess's avatar

Absolutely EVERYTHING this week was stupid! You did a great job getting through all that and adding your famous vocabulary words to make us chuckle! I am still wondering why the hell he hasn’t been arrested!!!! Hope everyone stays safe!

Ole Anderson's avatar

Who is going to arrest him?

Not Bimbo Bondi and she controls most Federal law enforcement , FBI, US Marshalls, DEA. etc

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

Who will arrest him? No one. The people who have the authority to arrest him have already in plain sight slunk into hiding the fucking cowards they are.

Mary Greenwald's avatar

Supreme Court who will negate any indictment of Trump. The Gang of Six is ready with their Pardon Rubber stamps.

Tess's avatar

Right…all a bunch of delusional maggots. But wouldn’t you think SOMEONE/SOME LEGAL source would hold him accountable?! I only pray it is coming soon for all of them!

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

Tess yes. Who would stand up and follow our laws and arrest him? Jack Smith tried.

Tess's avatar

Yes…it is so frustrating isn’t it?!!!

Megan Ross's avatar

I wonder everyday why "he" hasn't been "offed" by somebody with access to him! They would win a Nobel Peace Prize! 🏆

Susie's avatar

This. Definitely this. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

Tess, we are on the right side of right. How do we make our Constitution work?

Susan Niemann's avatar

Wow. Religion is killing America-those people need serious mental help.

How is it not clear to everyone that the felon is insane? Same with Valentina. The term wingnut comes to mind. 🤪

Bob's avatar

She makes Anna Luntic seem half sane.

Susan Niemann's avatar

That’s the truth!! 🤦‍♀️

Paula Dean's avatar

Ann Appalling Lunatic. Her name is spot on.

🌷IntheHalloftheMtnKing's avatar

She is truly crazy and very angry

Megan Ross's avatar

She definitely shouldn't have access to firearms! She's clearly unhinged. 😳

Bob's avatar

A sure case in need of a 5150, aka, California Penal Code for a 72-hour psych hold.

James Starr's avatar

I know for a fact there are so many more Texans in my former home-state that are just like Valentina....just so far into the right-wing magasphere with no chance in hell of ever seeing logic or light...they are demented sociopaths and very nasty people , inside and out.

Cathy Wray's avatar

James, Texas republicans are very nasty and cruel. Did you know that little immigrant girls who have been impregnated by rape are being sent from concentration camps to one in Texas because Texas bans abortions, with no exceptions? Little girls that grow fetuses have their own bodies harmed. Goddamn I hate texas.

s.Michael Morgan's avatar

The theme today is that these MAGAs know nothing about their own religion or other religions. Who wants to break the news to Valentina Gomez that the God of the Moslems is the SAME God of Israel?

Lisa Bieber's avatar

To paraphrase comedian Dave Fulton: "Trust Jesus they say. I have no problem with that, he seems like a decent guy. It's all these crazy people who claim to work for him that I don't trust!"

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

I don't understand. How is Valentina Gomez not in Trump's Cabinet?

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

But Trump is the least racist person ever. He's told us so.

Judy Gibson's avatar

Well, there is that… men can be brown, but not women. And not too many men…

Bob Bowden's avatar

It’s spelled “liddle” in the dictatortionary

HI2thDoc's avatar

Not for lack of effort, apparently.

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

Fascism don't end very well

So they'll find a nice warm spot in hell

But before they get to it

They'll put us all through it

"Divide them and conquer, oh well!"

But the end's coming sooner than later

Our country's not meant for these haters

These people are idjits

Their power's like widgets

They shoulda just been cater waiters!

Please subscribe to my Substack!

You'll laugh!

You'll cry!

It's better than CATS!

And Jeff doesn't seem to mind.... I love him and all that he represents...

HI2thDoc's avatar

Sold out by sycophant Don

The conman who fell for a con

He kowtowed to Pooty

And slobbered his booty

Now Pooty is helping Iran

T L Mills's avatar

And Putin is laughing his head off to think how he played and played Donnie for a fool--which he is--and then Putin, still laughing, sticks a shiv in Donnie's back.

Reader/Writer's avatar

Well, conquering the USA is, and always has been, his goal.

Charles Austin's avatar

👏👏👏👏👏👏

Charles Austin's avatar

👏👏👏👏👏👏

George A. Polisner's avatar

Jeff -first and foremost, thank you!

While considering Noem's replacement -your articles provide clear evidence that the MAGA bench is deep with incompetents, sociopaths, and alcoholics. It's like replacing James Comer-Pyle with a bag of hammers.

While you continue to chronicle the deep well of swamp stupidity surrounding the war mongering criminal elect pedophile, we are at work trying to provide the antidote to our freefall into dystopia.

We have three (count them ... three!) -important projects in the public interest we are diligently focused on:

alonovo/linked trust: The system we are building connects everyday purchases to evidence-based data about companies regarding their labor practices, executive pay ratios, environmental impact, diversity policies, animal welfare, and supply chain standards. Our team recently added a mechanism to flag a company if they are actively collaborating with ICE. We've got a working prototype up at https://demos.linkedtrust.us/alonovo/ and aside from rapidly expanding the streams of trusted data, we have a significant innovation: a receipt to ESG report for consumers (the flow is defined at: https://civicworks.github.io/gapworks/alonovo/pipeline/) and the idea is to take something as simple as a photo of a shopping receipt, and provide very easy to understand ESG feedback of the overall shopping experience and each line item purchase. There have been many recent (and important) anecdotal boycott recommendations from large organizations like Indivisble, 50501, and calls for subscription cancellations from Scott Galloway. We're working as fast as possible to support such campaigns with objective evidence-based data from trusted sources.

The other two projects are:

Action Engine: a replacement for Mobilize.us/EveryAction after their acquisition by private equity -which you'll quickly recognize is a glaring privacy concern for any participant in No Kings, ICE, and other widespread opposition to cruel, abusive, and lawless attacks by the present Administration.

CivicSky Media: a decentralized hate-free platform intended to connect independent journalists and readers across networks such as Bluesky and Mastodon. Think of CivicSky as a replacement for Facebook, Substack, and Twitter. The long-term vision is a secure digital civic space where thoughtful and provocative articles and conversation can lead to civic action: economic actions, civic actions, and educational actions. This has been a long running project, initially envisioned as a “Facebook” alternative in the public interest. It is being completely redesigned to use the concept of decentralization which provides greater protection for authors, journalists, independent media, and subscribers.

Our explainer site is up at https://civ.works and more detail about the three core projects are at https://civ.works/projects.

Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

It’s a mouthful, but thank you for your focus and diligence.

George A. Polisner's avatar

Thank you -and yes -a mouthful and more fun than a barrel of Cabinet members.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Good info - thanks George

Neal Stiffelman's avatar

Outta words here, homies. Thank goodness for y’all.

Paula Dean's avatar

Me too. My brain has been shorting out over my reactions to the news. I'm going to sound as untethered as tRump if I type my current thoughts. 🤪🥴😵‍💫

Robin Barfoot's avatar

When Trump is gone, I don't care if it costs a zillion dollars, I want everything restored to the way it was at the White House. I want the cement torn out of the Rose garden. If he has started or finished his shitty dance hall, I want it torn down. I want the East Wing rebuilt to as close to what it was as is possible. All the little stuff, too. All the cheesy faux gold bullshit out of the Oval Office. Any pictures of trump burned. You get the drift. And I want them to take all the money to do that from the Trump family. Fuckers.

Susie's avatar

This is a stellar plan. I’m in.

Cathy Wray's avatar

Robin, I totally agree with you!!!

Malcolm Maremont's avatar

Not only are people walking around without legs, they're walking around without brains and spines!

Maggie&Lefty's avatar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Lamorindalinda's avatar

From what i’ve heard, the GREAT & ACCEPTABLE leader they have “chosen” is the son of the ayatollah whom they just killed. Supposedly he is more vicious than his father. And you can imagine how angry and vindictive he will be at the country that killed his father. Buckle up people, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.

HI2thDoc's avatar

American conservatives, and of course the dumbfuck lunatics of MAGA, fail to grasp that you can remove a dictator but it's always possible to get someone worse. How the hell can't they understand this?

Paula Dean's avatar

Especially since we have ample examples from recent history.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Iran has made a strategic move. It's being reported that they won't bomb countries that aren't being used as staging areas by the US.

Outdoorluvr's avatar

Dang. I thought I read yesterday that the Evil Junior is NOT the one our own regime wants in power. It's getting increasingly difficult to weed out the dedicated independent journalists from the click bait bullshitters here. 🫤

Mike Hammer's avatar

So how is it that he lies through his teeth constantly yet he always tells us what he’s going to do.

Joyce's avatar

Because every time he's concentrating on delivering the latest line of bullshit, his cheese curd brain loses track of the narrative and he includes an accidental confession.

Christine Howard's avatar

Jeff, I simply love your humor, it gets me out of the funk when I see and read the news. Thank you so much for your take on this awful administration. It lightens the load we all carry.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Buh-bye Kristi, I wish you left sooner

And I hope your next posting is lunar

But where ever you are

Corey won't be far

And you two can still have a nooner

Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂😂👏👏👏👏👏

Jane's avatar

😂😂😂