this week in stupid: December 14 edition

Nancy Mace whines, Vivek defines, and so much more...

Jeff Tiedrich

Dec 14, 2024

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as another stupid week comes to a close here in America, let’s look back at some of the highlights.

monday: no low is too low

here’s a cautionary tale about why you should never fucking ever be nice to the worst person in the world.

at the reopening of Notre Dame, First Lady Jill Biden found herself seated near Donny Convict — and when he started dementedly yammering in her direction, she smiled politely and tolerated it.

big mistake — because look what the Shithead-Elect did with the photo.

“a fragrance your enemies can’t resist!”

‘enemies.’ so classy.

please tell me, why the fuck is this narcoleptic fart factory selling his own scent? do the cultists really want to smell like overripe diaper?

but it’s what Fox News did when they got hold of this story that really moved it into next-level cringe.

Fox News anchor Harris Faulkner suggests that Jill Biden is having an affair with Donald Trump: “Clearly she gravitates towards power.” After co-host Emily Compagno starts oohing and ahhing, Faulkner doubles down. “I will just say it, because it is the truth.”

ugh. just when you think the giggling idiots at Fox can’t go any lower … they do.

I think I need to take a shower.

tuesday: Nancy maces her credibility

it’s been a busy week for the Senate’s neediest attention-hog.

first, there was the emergence of an old video showing Nancy Mace spitting a shot of liquor into another woman’s mouth.

then there was the episode where Nancy pretended to have been assaulted by a person who witnesses swear did nothing of the sort. she then spent the entire day doing wounded dipshit cosplay.

but the crowning moment of fuckfacery came when she whined on not-twitter that she couldn’t find a printer willing to produce her transphobic wrapping paper.

“My team just informed me that no company would make this wrapping paper for us because it’s too ‘offensive.’ What I find offensive is men in women’s bathrooms. But anyway, who would’ve bought this wrapping paper?”

oh boo fucking hoo, you broken-inside waste of oxygen. here, have a binky.

why the fuck is a member of the United States House of Representative trying to sell her own branded wrapping paper? Jesus H. Christ on a red hot chili pepper, is there not one person in the MAGAsphere who isn’t trying to grift off the cultists?

wednesday: stupidity is contagious

what the fuck happened to Naomi Wolf? she used be a garden-variety ‘wellness’ crank — but lately she’s become a full-bore anti-vax conspiracy loon.

“Do other unvaccinated people feel routinely unwell after flying cross country with the vaccinated or being shut indoors with them for periods of time? It takes both Brian and me a full day to recover at times. Just a bad headachey toxic feeling.”

listen up, you ninny. vaccine particles aren’t leaping off your seatmates and landing on you. that’s not how biology works. but here’s what you are doing: cooping yourself up in close quarters for hours with a hundred or so complete strangers, breathing their air, and you’re not vaccinated against anything.

no wonder you end up feeling like shit.

oh look, Naomi’s followers are just as delusional as she is.

I wish there were a vaccine against stupid.

thursday: sir!

of all the things that never happened to Vivek Ramaswamy, here’s the thing that never happened the most.

“Just got approached by a federal employee who asked for a selfie & shared how much she appreciates DOGE: “it has to happen & if I get fired, I’m ok with it.” Most humans are good people & yes that includes most federal workers too. It’s the size & scope of the *bureaucracy* that’s the problem.”

Viv, is this federal employee who can’t fucking wait to lose her job in the room with us right now?

is she big and strong? is the afternoon sun glinting off her biceps as tears of gratitude roll down her cheeks? most importantly, is she calling you ‘sir’?

bro, if you’re going to work for Dear Leader, at least learn how to tell a bullshit story the way he would.

friday: working class zero

look, I don’t condone what Luigi Mangione did, but I fucking well understand what made him do it.

that said — shut the fuck up, Bret Stephens.

let’s look at Bret’s thesis. here’s why he’s calling a predatory capitalist CEO a ‘working class hero.’

Thompson “grew up in a working-class family in Jewell, Iowa,” a tiny farming community north of Des Moines, Amy Julia Harris and Ernesto Londoño report. “His mother was a beautician, according to family friends, and his father worked at a facility to store grain.” Thompson’s childhood was spent “going row by row through the fields to kill weeds with a knife, or working manual labor at turkey and hog farms.”

oh goody, Brian Thompson did that one thing that conservatives never tire of lecturing the poors to do — he pulled himself up by his own bootstraps and made something of himself. and for wingnut opinionators like Bret Stephens, that’s the beginning and the end of the story. yay! the American dream.

but it’s not the really end of the story, is it? because let’s see what Bootstrapping Brian did with his life: he turned his back on the people like those he grew up around, and became the CEO of an insurance company that made billions of dollars from denying healthcare to folks who need it.

working class hero, my ass.

do you have a nomination for This Week in Stupid? email me at jefftiedrich@gmail.com. thanks!

here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.

we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.