this week in stupid: August 17 edition
Fox News blushes, Don Junior rushes, and so much more...
as another stupid week comes to a close here in America, let’s look back at some of the highlights.
monday: get a room already, you two
it’s been a minute, so let’s check in on the Space Nazi’s social media cesspool.
oh no! two of the worst people in the world are fighting.
Milo Yiannopoulos is, of course, the extreme-MAGA provocateur who was shunned by the entire wingnutsphere for a bunch of comments that appeared to promote pedophilia — and Nick Fuentes is the Nazi incel who famously dined with Donny Convict at Motel-a-Lago.
both of these charming shitweasels had been previously banned from twitter because of, y’know [gestures all around] — and both were reinstated by the Space Nazi, because of course he did.
tuesday: this is your brain on racism
Trump War Room is an official Trump Campaign not-twitter account. with blatant bigoted fearmongering like this, it’s no wonder that the only Black people who support Donny are the seven-fingered, imaginary kind.
let’s zoom in there —
oh yeah, nice mullet, Donny.
and now, I’d like to offer up this much more accurate representation of what your neighborhood would look like under Trump.
you’re welcome.
wedesday: new Harris scandal drops
oh fuck, you’re fucking kidding me. Kamala Harris fucking swears? oh, fuck, it’s good fucking night for her fucking campaign. how the fuck will she ever fucking recover from this fucking disaster?
here’s what’s got Fox News’ knickers in a twist: in a years-old interview that Laura Ingraham apparently just discovered, Kamala was asked, “what’s your favorite curse word?”
her answer: “it starts with M and ends with A.”
so you can add this to the ever-growing pile of Kamala scandals: she laughs, she hugs, she dances — and, apparently, she curses like a motherfucka.
thursday: a septum is — for the ten thousandth time — a terrible thing to waste
oh fuck, Individual-1 Junior has done all the cocaine again.
“thirtytimeswe’redancingnononowe’renotatallmediathey’reclearlynotthey’reclearlynot”
so Donny Junior has this streaming thing on Rumble, where he gibbers incoherently at a mile a minute for anywhere from twenty minutes to an hour.
I have a question: who is watching this show? who is out there living a life so devoid of interest that they opt to sit at their computer and watch a guy with half the gross national product of Boliva shoved up his nostrils break the land speed record for gibberish?
hey, Junior — Tony Montana says to slow the fuck down, he doesn’t get a new shipment in until next week.
friday: new Walz scandal drops
those pernicious commies, Kamala Harris and Tim Walz, are up to their clever little Marxist tricks again. the duo keeps releasing short videos that play up how likable they are, and it’s breaking every wingnut brain.
Tim: “like, I have white guy tacos.”
Kamala: “what does that mean, like mayonnaise and tuna?”
Tim: “pretty much ground beef and cheese.”
innocuous, right? just two people with genuine affection for each other, bantering.
there are two things you need to know about this clip: one, it’s a joke. Tim Walz actually loves him some spicy food.
two, fragile white male Republicans can’t take a joke.
am I right, Matt Walsh?
“Tim Walz says that he makes white guy tacos, and Kamala says what is that, mayonnaise and tuna? like, that is anti-white racism.”
“This isn’t cute. Walz is being used as a clown to mock white people. If Walz doesn’t like spicy food that’s fine, but it has nothing to do with being a white guy.”
listen up, you joyless fuckwads — can we talk? a white guy who is able to laugh at himself is not racism.
this is racism, ok?
two extremely likable Democrats are running to be president and vice president of the United States. deal with it, dipshits.
it’s not our fault your candidates are an unlikable convict and an unlikable couchfucker who can barely stand to be in the same room with each other. it’s not our fault that Project 2025 is an toxic shitpile of unlikable policies.
better luck next election.
saturday: ?
hey, it’s still morning as I sit here writing this. but give it time, I guarantee you that some dipshit wingnut is going to do something stupid before the day is over. you can set your watch to it.
Nice fucking wrap up for this fucking stupid week Jeff!! VOTE HARRIS/WALZ——for fucks sake! Woo Hoo!!!!!!
Hi Jeff, I’m traveling, a senior gentleman asked to sit with me at breakfast.. we start talking, come to find out he was born and raised in Detroit, university in Washington state including a PHD in communications. Received an offer to teach at university in Japan 30 years ago.. Said he will never come back to live here, hates MAGA Trump… his opinion is the Japanese people are deathly afraid of Donald.. they can see the resemblance to Tojo.. frightening to say the least, Japanese are more afraid of N Korea than China..that tells you something about the distortions of the American press vis a vis China.. Best to you…