this was a super-stupid week. they way I do these, is every Sunday I start a new draft, and as the week progresses, I paste one or two or three links to stupid shit into each day, and then on Saturday morning decide which to write about. this week, many of the days had up to six stories to choose from
I realize that, given all the idiotic things people with actual POWER have done, Charlie Kirk ranting about birth control at "an event" (no matter what I type into Google, I can't find exactly where that event is, but there's video evidence and it doesn't look like AI!) is pretty small potatoes. OTOH, it's assholes like Kirk who make Nazis like Trump, Bobert, Greene, *ad nauseum* possible.
Guys like him make the generation after mine feel genuinely more ignorant and STUPID, but I know more than enough smart kids (well, former kids now) to know that's not the case.
Super-dee-doo-stupid indeed! I shouldn't be, but I am continually amazed at what these fucknozzles come up with...do they just sit around all day and think this shit up? Are their lives that boring? Are there really that many super stupid morons in our country??? It's kind of a rhetorical question, but nevertheless, thank you Jeff for keeping it laughable. Otherwise my forehead would be permanently dented.
Lynn.... all the rest of us poor workin' folks don't have time to sit around thinking up this high level of absolute bullshit. We have day jobs and household chores.
If only media would stop calling it “a mistake”, or an error in filing, or any of those words that make it sound like an oopsie. Have we learned nothing? This shit is mastercraft level tactical deceive, delay, and divert. Is there a way we can put media on trial for sabotage or giving comfort to the enemy?
He’s so stupid he insults one of his rape victims and pays $5 million in damages. Then does it again and it costs him $83 million! And this dim bulb is chosen by a major political party to be their leader? Can’t make this up. History will wonder WTF?
And this idiot claims to be a "genius" in domestic and foreign policy. OBJECTIVELY self-disqualified and untrustworthy for ANY public office. The Press has to start asking him and his enablers the WHY questions. Dig for the reasons for this behavior. WHY questions are legit hard news reporting.
Oh, I'm sure he won that championship fair and square. And I'm only being half sarcastic - I'm sure whatever golfing partners he has around him soon learn that it's a question not of "will I win?" but "how can I lose most gracefully to this idiot and not make it look obvious?"
The Roy Cohn School of Life. Do your crimes in the open and force authorities to stop you. If they do you demand fair treatment you wouldn’t give them. If they don’t stop you, you win.
I am going with SnortyMcFailson today. Perfect. And was it Jeff who described Eric and eating wallpaper paste? Or did I imagine that? His wildlife-ish teeth (perfect for gnawing) and complexion sure give the impression that he munches on wallpaper paste, or drywall
Yep he did, and now he’s been given an additional 10 days to find a substitute who’s dumb enough to earmark $175M to help your most famous goon-president to prevent the courts from selling his properties to the lowest bidder. 😂🙃
Given Hankey's obviously another enabler/lackey, the real question should be whether this was another premeditated delay effort (almost certainly so, it's Trump's way). If so, Engoron should toss Trump's blowout-threatening diapered ass in the clink for contempt, perjury and obstruction of proceedings.
Enough granting those involved with Trump's defense/schemes the "benefit of the doubt" when EVERY SINGLE TIME their actions turn out to be willful, bad-faith deception and fraud.
one of those "ya can't make this shit up" kind of moments!....it's truly impossible to fathom the level of ignorance and stupidity of Caitlyn Jenner at this point
I was going to make a comment, but you beat me to it. I thought I had seen and read enough stupid shit to last a lifetime but boy, people just keep entertaining us with more. And it’s only Saturday?
Caitlin was also one of the Republicans who tried to unseat Gavin Newson in CA back a few years ago. When she announced that she was running for Governor it was like she s thought she'd have a chance in hell, and I think she ended up with less than 1% of the vote! But...who knows, maybe she's gearing up to try again!😵💫🤣
Bruce Jenner won lots of Olympic gold medals and fame as a swimmer. Caitlyn didn’t want to be Bruce anymore. Couldn’t deal with all the publicity and attention, maybe? Irony intended.
It's kind of nuts, given Trans Day of Visibility stays on the same day—it's EASTER that moves around the calendar! I knew that as a seven-year old Protestant, so it I find shocking how many "Christians"...don't.
I know that a percentage of the human population has always been either bug-fuck crazy, willfully stupid, or both. It only seems like a recent occurrence because we didn't have the stupid crazy blasted into our faces 24/7 before the advent of cable news, wingnut radio, and the inter-tubes. But damn, if it doesn't just seem like too much all day, every day, forever.
The deranged horseshit king of stupid gave that segment of the twisted gene pool the green light to be even more stupid and demented. We didn't have to put up with this crap back in the Walter Cronkite days when the media didn't make insanity mainstream.
Back in the day, we all got our news from pretty much the same sources -- local TV news, local newspapers, news magazines, and respected journalists on national TV. Now we can't even agree on what is real.
Hey MTG, did you realize that the last eclipse happened in 2017 when D-F-F was president? Was that an omen that the Democrats would steal the 2020 election?
There's a wonderful joke on Facebook saying the Rapturists will be thiinking the eclipse is going to be the Rapture and to make sure and leave a lot of your clothes just lying around out in the yard or wherever so it looks like they took you.
My dad liked to tell would-be Rapturists about the group c.1000AD who sold everything and went and sat on a hill waiting to be taken (which of course didn't happen.) If he were still around, he'd be getting a real kick out of the current batch.
although, you know... the house next door is empty at the moment (between families) -- it's SO tempting to lay clothes out in the yard and on the porch to make it look like they had been raptured, then to take pics & post online... Facebook would have a field day with it!
This isn't so much about humanity as it is about owning some dumbass MAGAts. Not likely to do it (too many ways it could go horribly wrong) but for me, life in Texas requires having an active fantasy life.
to be clear, the Christians who were convinced that the Rapture was going to happen at the end of the first millenium AD DID sell everything and go sit out on a hill waiting to be taken. It was the being-taken-to-heaven part that didn't actually happen.
I wish that manufactured horseshit theory that someone pulled straight from his posterior was real , just so I could laugh at them for not being chosen.
Marj was right. The earthquake WAS a sign from God but only to ONE person. The epicenter was Bedminster Golf course. The message was being directed at her false idol. The rest of us were just along for the ride.
That was a whole lot of fun to read later in the day. I was streaming a live trial from New York yesterday when everybody's alarms for bad weather were going off on their phones. And then to find out where the epicenter was was rich.
And Individual 1 Junior. What I’d really like to know is the source for Snorty aka Cokie aka Individual 1 Jr having a heart to explode from snorting “half the gross national product of Bolivia” (love it!).
Donald Adolf Trump’s “Truth” (hahahahah) Social – yet another LIAR, FRAUD, CON Trump CLOWN SHOW. “Truth” (hahahahah) Social generated $4.1 million in revenues ……and a loss of $58.2 million! (One lesson learned: Do NOT hire IDIOT Devin Nunes to run a company! He doesn’t have any idea how to run/manage a business!)
I love that some of Fraud Trump’s MAGAdimwits bought the stock above $60.00 per share. With the stock now down to $40.00 per share, they’ve already suffered a loss of no less than 33% on their “investment” in Fraud Trump’s newest Clown Show. How dumb does one have to be to buy into a company that is going absolutely nowhere, a company we all know is majority-owned by a guy who’s been proven to be a FRAUD!
Prior to now, I wasn’t into religion. But, with Fraud Trump on the scene - ranting, raving, slobbering, lying, conning, and committing fraud again and again and again, I’ve turned religious. Nowadays, my day begins with a daily prayer……
“Dear Jesus, please take it upon yourself to ensure that Scumbag Trump suffers a massive fatal stroke, or a massive fatal heart attack, or a car accident that leaves him, for the rest of his sad/sorry life, like a bowl of Jello.” (No offense to Jello.)
I’m TOTALLY CONVINCED THAT DONALD “THE FRAUD” TRUMP IS THE MOST DISGUSTING, DETESTABLE SCUMBAG ON PLANET EARTH.
Stupid f***ing idiots-“snorty mcfailson,” pos “jenner,’ “brain-fried nutball,” kool-aid dumbasses, nazi lover and no history lessons in her brain Libby, “Handy Oakley”-who still thinks parties are like when she was 16 in the backwoods, and sporky-who must have attended same school as libby…..’CHRIST ON A STALE SALTINE”….Jeff-you had SO much to write about this week…..(unfortunately ….or fortunately for our humor!)
His cultists think he miraculously knows what is written in the Bible… no evidence of his having read two sentences required. I would love to see his answers to a multiple choice quiz about names Books in the Bible and also decide which Books are in Old and New testaments. Orange McFailDad
An embarrassment of riches. There oughta be a special word that encompasses this collection of human -like organisms, something on the order of a murder of crows or gaggle of geese.
Thanks for including Bruce Jenner. I am trans, and Bruce does not represent the trans community IMO. Bruce acts more like the guy who drew the short straw at some Heritage Foundation Fuckery gathering and was “chosen” to be this trans-GOP puppet. Wait for a de-transition from him eventually and Bruce will spread more misinformation about trans lives…
Caitlin has always been a Repub, even when he was Bruce. She is a terrible rep for the trans community and glad to know that she doesn’t speak for you or anyone else.
this was a super-stupid week. they way I do these, is every Sunday I start a new draft, and as the week progresses, I paste one or two or three links to stupid shit into each day, and then on Saturday morning decide which to write about. this week, many of the days had up to six stories to choose from
sorry, Charlie Kirk, there was no room for your "birth control destroys women's brains" remark
When Charlie was a teenager, even with birth contro,that couldn't stop him from getting calluses on this hands.
And he is not blind either........
Just saying.....
Hahahahaha!💀
Thank you, Jeff. The less I see Charlie Kirk, the happier I am.
I went back to read the list again because I thought I had scrolled past Charlie's thinly veiled admission that he's on birth control.
Charlie Kirk IS birth control. Just look at him! And yes, he got someone to marry him, but so what? Even Pol Pot got married
Maybe you can put it in sometime this week?
Well considering he doesn't understand sex, should involve female lubrication, I'm not surprised.
I realize that, given all the idiotic things people with actual POWER have done, Charlie Kirk ranting about birth control at "an event" (no matter what I type into Google, I can't find exactly where that event is, but there's video evidence and it doesn't look like AI!) is pretty small potatoes. OTOH, it's assholes like Kirk who make Nazis like Trump, Bobert, Greene, *ad nauseum* possible.
Guys like him make the generation after mine feel genuinely more ignorant and STUPID, but I know more than enough smart kids (well, former kids now) to know that's not the case.
Super-dee-doo-stupid indeed! I shouldn't be, but I am continually amazed at what these fucknozzles come up with...do they just sit around all day and think this shit up? Are their lives that boring? Are there really that many super stupid morons in our country??? It's kind of a rhetorical question, but nevertheless, thank you Jeff for keeping it laughable. Otherwise my forehead would be permanently dented.
Lynn.... all the rest of us poor workin' folks don't have time to sit around thinking up this high level of absolute bullshit. We have day jobs and household chores.
Jeff, just be glad you don't have any reason to suffer from writer's block.
Stupid shit, my tail.
Your commentary is NOT stupid . What our country spews out, oftentimes is!
And you chose wisely! A fabulous collection!
So, Trump got a bond from a used car salesman and two days later the wheels fell off. Who saw that coming?
I didn't see it coming but I certainly wished for it to happen
If only media would stop calling it “a mistake”, or an error in filing, or any of those words that make it sound like an oopsie. Have we learned nothing? This shit is mastercraft level tactical deceive, delay, and divert. Is there a way we can put media on trial for sabotage or giving comfort to the enemy?
I would like to talk to the genie you said your wish to please. 🥹
But he did get another delay so there's that. That's probably all he wanted. Plus, Hankey gets to tell everyone how rich he is.
Idiocracy come to life. “You don’t know anyone as stupid as Donald Trump. You just don’t.” Fran Libowitz.
He’s so stupid he insults one of his rape victims and pays $5 million in damages. Then does it again and it costs him $83 million! And this dim bulb is chosen by a major political party to be their leader? Can’t make this up. History will wonder WTF?
...and then he does it a THIRD time in a press conference complaining about that $83M judgment!
And this idiot claims to be a "genius" in domestic and foreign policy. OBJECTIVELY self-disqualified and untrustworthy for ANY public office. The Press has to start asking him and his enablers the WHY questions. Dig for the reasons for this behavior. WHY questions are legit hard news reporting.
How stupid is he? He’s so stupid he cheats at golf (a game based on honor) without hiding it and then claims to win the championship.
Oh, I'm sure he won that championship fair and square. And I'm only being half sarcastic - I'm sure whatever golfing partners he has around him soon learn that it's a question not of "will I win?" but "how can I lose most gracefully to this idiot and not make it look obvious?"
https://www.palmbeachpost.com/story/sports/2023/02/03/trump-and-golf-fancy-resorts-a-list-partners-cheating-at-highest-level/69857594007/
Aha, so I was wrong, he doesn't even TRY not to make it look obvious.
The Roy Cohn School of Life. Do your crimes in the open and force authorities to stop you. If they do you demand fair treatment you wouldn’t give them. If they don’t stop you, you win.
Thanks ! Of course we all know that he cheats but that was a fun read ! 😂
Idiocracy indeed. Thank you
I am going with SnortyMcFailson today. Perfect. And was it Jeff who described Eric and eating wallpaper paste? Or did I imagine that? His wildlife-ish teeth (perfect for gnawing) and complexion sure give the impression that he munches on wallpaper paste, or drywall
And he misses the good old days when he could enjoy the strangely satisfying crunch of lead paint chips.
Yep he did, and now he’s been given an additional 10 days to find a substitute who’s dumb enough to earmark $175M to help your most famous goon-president to prevent the courts from selling his properties to the lowest bidder. 😂🙃
Given Hankey's obviously another enabler/lackey, the real question should be whether this was another premeditated delay effort (almost certainly so, it's Trump's way). If so, Engoron should toss Trump's blowout-threatening diapered ass in the clink for contempt, perjury and obstruction of proceedings.
Enough granting those involved with Trump's defense/schemes the "benefit of the doubt" when EVERY SINGLE TIME their actions turn out to be willful, bad-faith deception and fraud.
Best anecdote/analogy winner 😂🤣
Wait, I’m confused. Wasn’t Caitlyn once a guy? And she is complaining about Trans visibility day? And she is a Trump supporter?
Special kinda stupid.
one of those "ya can't make this shit up" kind of moments!....it's truly impossible to fathom the level of ignorance and stupidity of Caitlyn Jenner at this point
Truly. Just....yeah, truly.
Caitlyn brain impaired from meds and inherent stupidity that also manifests in his spawn
Stop making sense. It ruins the whole vibe :)
Hahahaha....I love this.
😆😆😆😆
I was going to make a comment, but you beat me to it. I thought I had seen and read enough stupid shit to last a lifetime but boy, people just keep entertaining us with more. And it’s only Saturday?
Yep, Caitlyn used to be a Bruce. Somehow, he lost one of his 3 brain cells on that memory. Some days I just can’t even. 🤦🏼
Caitlin was also one of the Republicans who tried to unseat Gavin Newson in CA back a few years ago. When she announced that she was running for Governor it was like she s thought she'd have a chance in hell, and I think she ended up with less than 1% of the vote! But...who knows, maybe she's gearing up to try again!😵💫🤣
Could it be her $120 Million dollars? I'm thinking yes. Tax breaks and all.
Bruce Jenner won lots of Olympic gold medals and fame as a swimmer. Caitlyn didn’t want to be Bruce anymore. Couldn’t deal with all the publicity and attention, maybe? Irony intended.
Bruce was a Track and Field guy.
Thank you, I must have confused him with Mark Spitz.
I won't tell Mark.....
It's kind of nuts, given Trans Day of Visibility stays on the same day—it's EASTER that moves around the calendar! I knew that as a seven-year old Protestant, so it I find shocking how many "Christians"...don't.
Once in a Million?
I know that a percentage of the human population has always been either bug-fuck crazy, willfully stupid, or both. It only seems like a recent occurrence because we didn't have the stupid crazy blasted into our faces 24/7 before the advent of cable news, wingnut radio, and the inter-tubes. But damn, if it doesn't just seem like too much all day, every day, forever.
The deranged horseshit king of stupid gave that segment of the twisted gene pool the green light to be even more stupid and demented. We didn't have to put up with this crap back in the Walter Cronkite days when the media didn't make insanity mainstream.
Back in the day, we all got our news from pretty much the same sources -- local TV news, local newspapers, news magazines, and respected journalists on national TV. Now we can't even agree on what is real.
Not even mainstream…. It is full steam and expected. The new “standard “ for “normal.”
Don't forget having so many elected
Hey MTG, did you realize that the last eclipse happened in 2017 when D-F-F was president? Was that an omen that the Democrats would steal the 2020 election?
The rapture has almost occurred so many times in my life I lost count 🥱
There's a wonderful joke on Facebook saying the Rapturists will be thiinking the eclipse is going to be the Rapture and to make sure and leave a lot of your clothes just lying around out in the yard or wherever so it looks like they took you.
My dad liked to tell would-be Rapturists about the group c.1000AD who sold everything and went and sat on a hill waiting to be taken (which of course didn't happen.) If he were still around, he'd be getting a real kick out of the current batch.
although, you know... the house next door is empty at the moment (between families) -- it's SO tempting to lay clothes out in the yard and on the porch to make it look like they had been raptured, then to take pics & post online... Facebook would have a field day with it!
Yes I would, but I'm far more interested in humanity than aliens & conspiracy theories
This isn't so much about humanity as it is about owning some dumbass MAGAts. Not likely to do it (too many ways it could go horribly wrong) but for me, life in Texas requires having an active fantasy life.
to be clear, the Christians who were convinced that the Rapture was going to happen at the end of the first millenium AD DID sell everything and go sit out on a hill waiting to be taken. It was the being-taken-to-heaven part that didn't actually happen.
I wish that manufactured horseshit theory that someone pulled straight from his posterior was real , just so I could laugh at them for not being chosen.
If I run into one of them, I'm going to tell them it did happen and they got left behind.
😁🤣😂❤️Oh, I like you!
I have a feeling a number of us could have a whole of giggles in the same room. Twould be so much fun.
😉😁
And one of the two presidential candidates stared directly into it. I forget which one.
That would be his orangeness.
That puts her down to a measly one brain cell.
OMG! History REPEATS itself! 🤯
Marj was right. The earthquake WAS a sign from God but only to ONE person. The epicenter was Bedminster Golf course. The message was being directed at her false idol. The rest of us were just along for the ride.
That was a whole lot of fun to read later in the day. I was streaming a live trial from New York yesterday when everybody's alarms for bad weather were going off on their phones. And then to find out where the epicenter was was rich.
Snorty McFailson is such a perfect name. Thanks, I needed that!
There’s always Cokie McSniffles
And Individual 1 Junior. What I’d really like to know is the source for Snorty aka Cokie aka Individual 1 Jr having a heart to explode from snorting “half the gross national product of Bolivia” (love it!).
Donald Adolf Trump’s “Truth” (hahahahah) Social – yet another LIAR, FRAUD, CON Trump CLOWN SHOW. “Truth” (hahahahah) Social generated $4.1 million in revenues ……and a loss of $58.2 million! (One lesson learned: Do NOT hire IDIOT Devin Nunes to run a company! He doesn’t have any idea how to run/manage a business!)
I love that some of Fraud Trump’s MAGAdimwits bought the stock above $60.00 per share. With the stock now down to $40.00 per share, they’ve already suffered a loss of no less than 33% on their “investment” in Fraud Trump’s newest Clown Show. How dumb does one have to be to buy into a company that is going absolutely nowhere, a company we all know is majority-owned by a guy who’s been proven to be a FRAUD!
Prior to now, I wasn’t into religion. But, with Fraud Trump on the scene - ranting, raving, slobbering, lying, conning, and committing fraud again and again and again, I’ve turned religious. Nowadays, my day begins with a daily prayer……
“Dear Jesus, please take it upon yourself to ensure that Scumbag Trump suffers a massive fatal stroke, or a massive fatal heart attack, or a car accident that leaves him, for the rest of his sad/sorry life, like a bowl of Jello.” (No offense to Jello.)
I’m TOTALLY CONVINCED THAT DONALD “THE FRAUD” TRUMP IS THE MOST DISGUSTING, DETESTABLE SCUMBAG ON PLANET EARTH.
May I please borrow this prayer? It’s more detailed than my daily “please let him be dead, please let him be dead, please let him be dead!”
Why isn’t he dead? Why isn’t he dead? Why isn’t he dead? We don’t get it.
He has rivals, unfortunately.
Junior always sounds like he swallowed a kazoo.
Isnt that the truth? He talks so fast you can see the spit fly outta his mouth. Coke is a BAAAADDDD drug.
Like he supplies 50% of the cartels gross profit!
Stupid f***ing idiots-“snorty mcfailson,” pos “jenner,’ “brain-fried nutball,” kool-aid dumbasses, nazi lover and no history lessons in her brain Libby, “Handy Oakley”-who still thinks parties are like when she was 16 in the backwoods, and sporky-who must have attended same school as libby…..’CHRIST ON A STALE SALTINE”….Jeff-you had SO much to write about this week…..(unfortunately ….or fortunately for our humor!)
Handy Oakley is for the ages. Snorty McFailson has topped even Jeff’s previous nomenclature.
By the way: where has Ivanka gone?
Ivanka and her conman husband are trying to stay away from the family shitshow……
The only time I've seen the Trump crime family leaving a church is when they were off to the golf course for some corpse and evidence disposal.
Damn! Woo wee! That was some take down. Nice.
When asked what is his favorite passage from the Bible, Dumpster couldn’t respond. We all know that he’s never opened a Bible.
His cultists think he miraculously knows what is written in the Bible… no evidence of his having read two sentences required. I would love to see his answers to a multiple choice quiz about names Books in the Bible and also decide which Books are in Old and New testaments. Orange McFailDad
wait, wait, wait...Agolf Shitler and the turd reich!!!!!!...AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...
OMG! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 😜
Cruel & the Gang
Fab, Mountain Boy!
An embarrassment of riches. There oughta be a special word that encompasses this collection of human -like organisms, something on the order of a murder of crows or gaggle of geese.
Nothing will beat Jeff’s “fucktangle of shitweasles” ❤️
True
A Singularity of Stupid is my favorite.
A Confederacy of Dunces
( good book BTW , by John Kennedy
O' Toole )
Cabal of kooks?
At the risk of completely alienating all James Joyce fans, I think of them as “the agenbite of dimwit.”
Bonus pts
Pools of fools !
John Cleese, said stupid people are too stupid to know how stupid they are.
I don’t know how you can make me laugh so hardily at such depressing news.
Thanks for including Bruce Jenner. I am trans, and Bruce does not represent the trans community IMO. Bruce acts more like the guy who drew the short straw at some Heritage Foundation Fuckery gathering and was “chosen” to be this trans-GOP puppet. Wait for a de-transition from him eventually and Bruce will spread more misinformation about trans lives…
The Tim Scott of the Trans community.
The same way Clarence Thomas is the Clayton Bixby of the Judicial branch 🤦🏻♀️
Caitlin has always been a Repub, even when he was Bruce. She is a terrible rep for the trans community and glad to know that she doesn’t speak for you or anyone else.
Of course, Trump didn't steal my money! I gave it to him!
fair point