true story: while I was writing this post, I could hear Ms. Spouse's laughter from across the house.
"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" I asked.
"ALL THE PRESIDENT'S BUTT-SNORKELERS," she replied, because that was the title of the Bulwark's round-up of the cabinet meeting, and it had just landed in her email —
and I am so fucking insanely jealous of how good that headline is
Just think all the cretins at that table were getting paid with our tax dollars. Our tax dollars bought the giant banner. This 4 year cluster clown fuck is courtesy of our tax dollars … Don’t get me started on Congress.
Another Californian here to link arms with you in that line! (edit: not a play on "arne link", who has a post below. Just a fluke of me not paying attention!)
The brilliance of Gavin Newsom is that he realized what Dwumpy Stumpido's secret power is. Just say shit. Crazy, ridiculous throw dog feces at the wall until something sticks shit. Gavin said, fuck you Washington, DC, no more blue state tax bucks to bail out your ridiculously crap management of the country for you cowardly losers. Go ahead, Make Me Send the Dollars. Come here, say it to my face, and fucking make me. Guess what, the little piss-ant yappie dogs and Dwumpy himself whined and complained, and no one actually tried. Which paves the way for Gavin to wait for the day when some serious shit hits the fan from DC, and the money faucet shuts off.
Yes indeed, I will petition our Prime Minister to turn off that gold plated faucet and turn on our snow making machine, before the end of August, no less. 😆
The way I see it, the invasion of one state by another is a call to state Governors to mobilize their National Guards to resist UNLAWFUL assault. Also, the gerrymander fight is on. There is a new playbook. The old rules have been struck down by the Supreme Court. We need to change the gears here as fast as possible for deadly PREEMPTIVE strikes. Newsom has moved out on this already. Who is next? Hochul. Where are you? NO EXCUSE! Change your state Constitution. Pritzker. What are you doing?
Watching the National Guard in DC, garbage bags in hand Stephen, is equally infuriating…as sycophantic clowns gathered around the head of the cretinous connard clown show as his malodorous codpiece and gaseous pollution fills the air!
While they were congratulating Trump Blue State governors who are actual adults are planning what is being called the "Soft Secession." I ran that idea by my book club last summer in case Trump were to win again, as we were busy reading Project 2025, and I was very clear eyed about what was going to happen and I am one who is big on knowing what is going on that is bad, and then figuring out how to solve the problem. It upset people in Red States a lot because they were like united we stand, only we are not united, and I see no reason for all states to go down with Trump as he sinks the ship. Let the Christian Nationalists go down with the ship they believe in that. I don't.
Here are two discussions today of the "Soft Secession."
Now my idea goes further, and would save Red States too. Have a bipartisan bill ending federal taxes. My idea is to give Terrorist Trump none of our money to play with since he only has 3 priorities:
1)billionaires with himself first
2) the military-- which he wants to use as his own private army to keep the rest of us in line
3) ICE--which is already out of control
I do not want to have my tax dollars go to put myself in prison, or be killed by my government.
Let the states pay the military salaries and then they know who they work for. Each state can have their own militia which would be lent to the federal government if our country were attacked, but not necessarily if our president wants to go be aggressive against a country that has not attacked us. Can we say Greenland, Canada, Mexico, Venezuela, Panama. I am sure the list will get longer as I speak. It would deflate Putin too, because whatever Trump said or did would have no teeth unless the Red States funded it.
Let us see how long those elected officials would stay in office, even if they use the Autocrats playbook as laid out by Anne Applebaum in her book, "Autocracy, Inc." chapter 5.
--The author of "From Dictatorship to Democracy" Gene Sharp says that nonviolent protest is more effective because the dictators are always better armed, and one has to find their Achilles heal of weakness instead. One takes power, but peacefully through opposition to the leader.
--Modern autocrats prefer to smear than kill to avoid the martyrdom of a person
They prepare their smear and legal campaigns ahead of time. (this is Trump to a T)
--Still they do spot murdering to keep people in line, they don’t have to do mass killings to do that. A few journalists or activists. (Starting with immigrants in ICE facilities and ending up with us for refusing to partake in a CN theocracy)
--Dictators make laws that outlaw anything that is activism, but they don’t say it directly.
--Corruption accusations against activists often makes even friends wonder and turns people against them.
--Public despair comes after the crushing of a movement, especially if violence has been used.
We understand the tactics and Blue States need to lead the way away from Authoritarianism.
I miss Old Boss Ross.....He had quite the voice!! I'm not well today because I upchucked about a dozen times yesterday because of that CREEP SHOW special.
when I watched liddle marco, it looked like he stuck his thumb in his pocket, which is possibly lined with Vicks or some other foul scent cancelling substance and then straight to his nose.
I still giggle out loud with the phrase "ass music."
I suppose one of Little Marco's "jobs" is to be the ablative armor to soak up the pricktator's rear-end salvos. He's taking one (or fifty) for the malevolent team.
The way I see it, the invasion of one state by another is a call to state Governors to mobilize their National Guards to resist UNLAWFUL assault. Selective persecution by Trump of Blue states divides this nation. Also, the gerrymander fight is on. There is a new playbook. The old rules have been struck down by the Supreme Court. We need to change the gears here as fast as possible for deadly PREEMPTIVE strikes. Newsom has moved out on this already. Who is next? Hochul. Where are you? REVISE your Constitution. Pritzker. What are you doing?
For gerrymandering corrections, Arizona seems ripe for the picking. Only 2 out of 8 House reps are Democrat in a 50-50 state (there is a vacant seat for number 9). Problem there (and in Wisconsin) is they have a huge majority Repub state legislature, itself created by gerrymandering Repub cheating, that would probably prevent this.
We lucked out here in Portland when Chavez De Remer was voted out as our representative. She served one term only. Thankfully. But then she failed up to Secretary of Labor. Good riddance to that butt snorkeler 🤮
Debbie, you couldn’t be more correct. We voted that bee-otch out of office because she was a liar, failed to deliver on promises she made and was a fucking MAGAT. That is, however, a prerequisite to being named to Shitler’s cabinet.
THAT’s what Marco needs, a snorkeling mask outfitted with an extra long 4’ tube that allows him to breathe air from a safe distance above the narcoleptic geezer’s low-hanging cloud of deadly ass-gas
I recall VP Mike Pence ass-snorkeling in term 1 and it didn’t turn out well for him. Guillotine on J6? The news media ought to replay both of these every day back-to-back.
All I know, is that it works for clean up of 3-day old roadkill in the hot Texas sun. How that might compare to the orange odoroferocity in an enclosed White House office, I can't guess.
Jeff - and this sure the fuck is not criticism - we didn't notice that little Marco stuck his hand in his pocket momentarily before sticking a finger in his nose. My other half noticed and immediately made the connection to the autopsy scene in Silence of the Lambs where the coroner, Clarice and the other FBI agent put some kind of salve-like material on to block the stench. A search failed to identify the material but lots of posts suggest it's Vicks.
Were I a meme or video person I'd make one of a WH dinner party at which every plate at the head table -except of course his - was adorned with a little jar of VIcks. Or maybe of ATurd Junior snorting some. Fertile minds, awake!!
After dealing (really not dealing well) with a family death, I turned here to see if I could possibly laugh for a few minutes. Bingo. I will read these again after feeling numb since it works. Sorry, but thanks Jeff. It hit the spot. 🙏🏻
My condolences, J.R. I'm doing the same here, except it's my dog (a worse loss than many of my family members, sad to say). Some of these substacks (Jeff, Andy Borowitz, etc.) can really help during these difficult times. Peace to you.
Can’t you just see how since each outburst of heartfelt, sincere praise must top the precious one, cabinet members are just itching to go next… the last one has to rip out their heart and present it to the fatfuck on a GOLDEN platter, then collapse with a rictus grin.
What’s most astonishing is how psychologically and intellectually stunted every one of Trump’s enablers are. Most likely, they know enough history to have learned what happens when you get too close to sociopathic leaders. Have they forgotten Hitler’s betrayals of his own henchmen, Putin’s purges? Yet, these elevated MAGAts inflate their own importance while clinging to a vicious, cut-throat liar. Trump discards people without a glance and destroys them if he can. For now he lacks the power to murder his rivals outright, but he is openly maneuvering toward jailing, deporting, and interning people in camps at his whim. And still, his simple-minded enablers, sorely lacking a healthy sense of self-preservation, convince themselves they will prosper by serving his evil designs. They echo every lie, defend every abuse, and march forward like lemmings believing he will lead them somewhere beautiful. History tells us what really awaits if only you could ask the disciples of Hitler and Putin who once thought the same.
And surrounding him are the ones who made his rise possible; the Heritage Foundation operatives, the corrupt men on the Supreme Court, and his Republican and MAGA enablers in Congress and beyond. Together they have staged the largest, most grotesque carnival of lies, convincing their followers that anything is justified if it keeps them in power. There is no crime too blatant, no hatred too vile, no indecency too shameless, no destruction too sweeping for them to embrace in pursuit of their goal. Just as Hitler and Putin cloaked their ambitions in empty promises and non-stop, ruthless propaganda, these architects of Trumpism will stop at nothing to achieve and cling to dominance, dragging a nation toward ruin while pretending it is salvation. His mouthpieces happily repeat every absurd, pathological claim he makes while the truth is staring us in the face.
His minions have sacrificed their humanity for personal gain, power and the permission to abuse people of color. They are a scourge on our country and the entire world.
The biological scourge, the next pandemic, is coming with the assistance of "the shitty Kennedy" (thank you, Marc Maron!). The second-most orange creep is a carrion eater who takes his grandkids swimming in a sewage contaminated creek. He prides himself on destroying the capacity of the US to develop and administer vaccinations, but thinks autism is our Number 1 health issue.
I can't figure out if these sycophantic bootlickers are just trying to get their 15 minutes of fame or if the members of this daycare center of an administration only can only see 5 minutes ahead of them and can't realize they are committing political suicide. As I have stated before, history has shown us that this type of power grab always ends in disaster. The resistance is growing. IMHO the implosion is nigh.
Trump’s enablers don’t care what history will say. They’re too hooked on power, money, and the thrill of being close to him. They silence their creeping doubts, repeat his bizarre and blatant lies, and tell themselves they’ll be safe, even as history shows people like them always end up discarded or disgraced. They think they’re clever, but they’re just pawns, sleepwalking through the same delusion Hitler’s and Putin’s enablers one once had: that loyalty to a sociopath will somehow protect them. It never does.
I think the snorkelers are looking for their 15.minutes. They're betting they can get what they want and then bail before the boom is lowered. I devoutly wish that boom comes down early!
Been thinking all along that both tRump and his cabinet are strictly just for show, while the heritage goons and s. miller are pulling the levers, so to speak. Apparently both noem and bondi take their marching orders from miller. Virtually all the cabinet heads were put in place to destroy or greatly diminish the very institutions and services they head. Feels coldly calculated. It's a "shitshow" by design.
Which begs the question: Why don’t DEMs have a war room & an army of lawyers combing 250 yr old documents for gray areas and loopholes… very strange indeed :/
Billionaire class warfare will provide them vast riches… the stable coin market , the death, and theft of the Federal Reserve appears imminent Michael!
I believe those Heritage Foundation operatives, along with others farther back in the shadows, are his handlers. It's a given that Pumpkin-Head isn't calling the shots, and even Miller has someone pulling his strings, IMO.
Definitely, Robin, except I think JD is only one step above Rump in the pecking order. He's a useful tool, as well. And yes, I agree that Elon is still a presence, public feud to the contrary.
And IMO, those you list, powerful as they are, are only the front line. I think there are those still more removed from common knowledge who have been playing this chess board for decades, descendants of those who played in the '50s, and on back two centuries or further. Just my theory.
Totally agree Denise. I'm 69 and was really never political most of my life so I didn't realize what was going on, but I think it started 40-50 years with Reagan, Newt Gingrich, Leonard Leo, Heritage Foundation, Koch Brothers, Mitch McConnell etc. (All white Christian nationalist billionares) and the Silicon Valley tech bros are their evil spawn. And so we don't ever forget Epstein, I was reading some articles written about him years ago and on top of being a pedophile and pervert he courted scientists and even Stephen Hawkings. Brilliant minds. He was an early believer like the tech bros in transhumanism (living forever through tech), AI, creating a superior race with his "genius" sperm (like Elon). It's so troubling to think how intellectually brilliant and gifted so many of them are (elite schools. Science, math, law) but like anyrhing, you can have those goods and use them for good or evil. They chose evil...and then throw religion into the mix. They all had abusive childhoods (except for Zuck and Bezos) , all were scifi addicts and gamers, but they never made it to "empathy". They all think they are going to live forever with their tech, get rid of the rest of the riff raff (us) wait it out in their underground bunkers and private islands, then take over the world like the James Bond villaons they are.
I hadn’t known that history about Epstein. It figures.
I'm 67, and I've been political since high school, when we studied how Nixon won in '68, among other things. It's easy to see how the Rs have schemed all these years to get where they are.
But the chess board has existed for centuries, according to some of my reading. One example from fairly recent history: at the end of WWII, a naval officer was on a Pacific beach, looking over piles of materiel and equipment. He asked a nearby quartermaster where all the stuff was being shipped. His answer was: Korea. We regular people think things just happen or escalate over a matter of months or so, but the chess moves are planned years in advance.
Seeing these mushroom polishers trying to out-sycophant each other is truly nauseating and unfathomable. These people have not one iota of integrity or self respect. Just the sort to run the nation. Nice job, voters.
And it takes 💯 percent of them to buy into this abomination for it to happen. Every stinking traitorous Republicon MUST GO. The whole fucking party should be incarcerated.
These professional fellators will thankfully never serve in any public office ever again as the Internet will continue to remind the entire planet of their self flagellation and groveling before a farting, shitting, stinking urine-leaking monster. And their children will be tormented by the forever documentation of their parents cowardice and cynicism. Fuck all of these scumbags very much.
The seating arrangement explained: Because the Secretary of State is the most prestigious member of the cabinet, he gets to sit at the right hand of God Awful. Because the Secretary of Defense/War is the second most prestigious member, he gets to sit at the left hand of His Satanic Majesty. Bring your gas mask!
Those imperial hands are beginning to look like they have a flesh-eating virus. The stench comes from all Trump's orifices and now his hands. Susie Wiles, Chief of Staff and Inner Sphincter to the Oval Orifice, probably arranges seating at these meetings.
“Without doing a boom boom in his pants”! 🤣🤣🤣. That disgusting display yesterday was vomit inducing for sure. None of those people have any dignity.
And did you guys hear that the CDC is ceasing to actively monitor food pathogens because of budget cuts? Listeria with your chicken. I’m in my phone or would post the link.
Bobby Brainworm continues to be the most dangerous man in the “Health industry.” Every week he destroys things that would save American lives. He is a criminal in EVERY sense of the word. His family should hire a hit man.
These gold-plated hacks aren't building mansions or railroads or cultural centers. They're building crypto-scams, like Nutlick's Cantor-Fitzgerald is involved in. They're pushing government and oligarchic investment in defense corporations while pumping arms sales and military occupation of our cities. Fascism 2025.
Lutnik would love nothing more than to shift our entire economy to his stable coin Tether, criminal’s favorite flavor. It’s in the works. Talk about the implosion of the world banking system. 110% inflation anyone?
Soo, after killing off folks by taking away vaccines, safety protocols for products, food safety, weather warnings, healthcare, and detention camps for the masses in every state. There's no workers/taxpayers left. How are they going to support their agendas? Really, I do not understand the endgame whatsover. They gonna just loot everything and live alone?
AI will need to run on trillion dollar nuclear power plants because the energy consumption of those mega data centers is already exceeding the capacity of fossil fuel utilities and renewables. Republicans still can't see beyond horse and buggy policies, but focus on quarterly earnings.
You guys are late to the party. The billionaires are building their bunkers, staffing them with AI, filling them with phony food, because they all understand what the climate crisis means. No food, mass starvation, but they think they'll survive. The niece of my locker partner in high school works for some company on the peninsula that is creating fake meat, etc. She says don't eat it.
They all puckered up to stand in line to kiss the enormous fat ass of the worst POtuS in American history!!! The Orange Monster stated yesterday at the massive ass kissing event that as the biggest POtuS in American history that he can do anything he wants! TOTAL BULLSHIT!!!
Seeing the Republicons and various MAGATS submit to the stench of Shitler is somehow, comforting. Liddle Marco and Shitler absolutely, positively, MUST be cell mates!
I didn't want to go into detail, because...yuck. But although, to me, diabetes seems a more probable cause, I've read that they were late-stage-syphilis lesions.
Oh, yes, he certainly was. In fact, several months ago, I was watching "A Man for All Seasons" (Robert Shaw version), and it struck me even more powerfully than it had before, how much Rump is like Henry. Thoroughly despicable characters, both of them. Except Henry was much more learned and accomplished.
Nice summary of yesterday's insanity The young lady throwing up in her mouth photo is just like me, but I'm an old lady throwing up in her mouth. Every damn day. I can't believe I'm saying this again, but every day is worse than the one before. How much can we take?
Probably the only meeting Donnie stays awake for lest he miss one of his toadies praising his miserable, orange, fart infested self. It's fucking embarrassing.
If Obama or Biden or Harris were to do anything remotely close to what the pricktator is doing Faux news would be 24/7 calling for impeachment, treason and a firing squad. Waters would be mumbling incoherently with his shit eating grin, Ingraham would have her panties tied in a knot with her slappable face, Pirro would have her box wine right on her desk and Hannity would be dead because his head would have completely blown off his shoulders.
Not only that, but Pam Bondi And Congress would be re-investigating it and relitigating it like they’re doing now by going after people from the 2016 election
The Mango Mussolini can always depend on his Depends, but what about the rest of his Cabinet members when it’s getting close to hour four in the meeting? Can’t imagine the agony.
I had a comment, but then I saw this line from Mrs. Spouse across your room "ALL THE PRESIDENT'S BUTT-SNORKELERS" and I laughed so hard I TOTALLY forgot what I was going to say!
Hes the bestest fuckwit because he has orgs like Rockbridge and fucking American Moment behind him. Weve done a full pull through on all their shit, EINs, org IDs, etc. And its some scary shit. And the worse part about it? They all know Trump is at Death's Door, and we Trumper Fuckwit AssMunch dies and leave the seat....then the REALLY Dark shit happens.
true story: while I was writing this post, I could hear Ms. Spouse's laughter from across the house.
"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" I asked.
"ALL THE PRESIDENT'S BUTT-SNORKELERS," she replied, because that was the title of the Bulwark's round-up of the cabinet meeting, and it had just landed in her email —
and I am so fucking insanely jealous of how good that headline is
Just think all the cretins at that table were getting paid with our tax dollars. Our tax dollars bought the giant banner. This 4 year cluster clown fuck is courtesy of our tax dollars … Don’t get me started on Congress.
We need to turn off the money tap! Just like those Canadians did with California’s water.
And it took all day to turn it off!
Well, ya know. It's a really, really big handle. Only big strong men with tears in their eyes are able to turn it and it takes a long time.
The tears are a result of knowing we live right next to 73 million crazy people…armed to the teeth.
I’m in. How do we do that?
Could blue states, you know, the ones that finance failing red states, withhold taxes from the federal government? I am not knowing.
Believe me, from here in California, I WOULD BE AT THE HEAD OF THAT FUCKING LINE
Right there with you!
Another Californian here to link arms with you in that line! (edit: not a play on "arne link", who has a post below. Just a fluke of me not paying attention!)
The brilliance of Gavin Newsom is that he realized what Dwumpy Stumpido's secret power is. Just say shit. Crazy, ridiculous throw dog feces at the wall until something sticks shit. Gavin said, fuck you Washington, DC, no more blue state tax bucks to bail out your ridiculously crap management of the country for you cowardly losers. Go ahead, Make Me Send the Dollars. Come here, say it to my face, and fucking make me. Guess what, the little piss-ant yappie dogs and Dwumpy himself whined and complained, and no one actually tried. Which paves the way for Gavin to wait for the day when some serious shit hits the fan from DC, and the money faucet shuts off.
Steve Bannon always told Trump throwing as much shit at the wall was more effective than anything else!
I think we should, and I hope blue states, including here in MD, are making a contingency plan in case.
But individual taxpayers send their federal taxes in to the Treasury Department- not to their states…
Yes indeed, I will petition our Prime Minister to turn off that gold plated faucet and turn on our snow making machine, before the end of August, no less. 😆
The way I see it, the invasion of one state by another is a call to state Governors to mobilize their National Guards to resist UNLAWFUL assault. Also, the gerrymander fight is on. There is a new playbook. The old rules have been struck down by the Supreme Court. We need to change the gears here as fast as possible for deadly PREEMPTIVE strikes. Newsom has moved out on this already. Who is next? Hochul. Where are you? NO EXCUSE! Change your state Constitution. Pritzker. What are you doing?
https://hotbuttons.substack.com/p/gerrymander-fight?r=3m1bs
😂
Krusty Gnome is running campaign ads for der leader with taxpayer money.
Loved how he got her and Gretchen mixed up. I hope she cried a little about her daddy forgetting her name and ran her mascara.
*Only* ran her mascara?? Hell, her face probably fell off, South Park style.
Most favorite scene in that episode for me, especially when it ran away.
THE BEST!!🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣
please, stop
Hard to believe someone more vile than Trump, but there she is.
The boater people are sure to be investigated! Wait- not going to happen!! Besides being T fans, they are drunk idiots.
Haven’t heard that Bruce, I’ll check into that!
None of these cretins will last 4 years.
Hopefully Leu!
Seems like an easy enough drum for DEMs to beat… yet 🦗🦗🦗❓
Maybe Gavin Newsom can hang a building sized picture of Trump and Epstein somewhere really visible, or one of Obama receiving the Nobel Peace Prize
Maybe both!
Watching the National Guard in DC, garbage bags in hand Stephen, is equally infuriating…as sycophantic clowns gathered around the head of the cretinous connard clown show as his malodorous codpiece and gaseous pollution fills the air!
I agree. It is a huge waste of resources and tRump is just doing it to thumb his nose at his detractors and say ‘see what I can do?’
While they were congratulating Trump Blue State governors who are actual adults are planning what is being called the "Soft Secession." I ran that idea by my book club last summer in case Trump were to win again, as we were busy reading Project 2025, and I was very clear eyed about what was going to happen and I am one who is big on knowing what is going on that is bad, and then figuring out how to solve the problem. It upset people in Red States a lot because they were like united we stand, only we are not united, and I see no reason for all states to go down with Trump as he sinks the ship. Let the Christian Nationalists go down with the ship they believe in that. I don't.
Here are two discussions today of the "Soft Secession."
Chris Armitage
https://open.substack.com/pub/cmarmitage/p/its-time-for-americans-to-start-talking?r=f0qfn&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false
Dean Blundell in Canada
https://open.substack.com/pub/deanblundell/p/the-quiet-breakaway-how-us-governors?r=f0qfn&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false
Now my idea goes further, and would save Red States too. Have a bipartisan bill ending federal taxes. My idea is to give Terrorist Trump none of our money to play with since he only has 3 priorities:
1)billionaires with himself first
2) the military-- which he wants to use as his own private army to keep the rest of us in line
3) ICE--which is already out of control
I do not want to have my tax dollars go to put myself in prison, or be killed by my government.
Let the states pay the military salaries and then they know who they work for. Each state can have their own militia which would be lent to the federal government if our country were attacked, but not necessarily if our president wants to go be aggressive against a country that has not attacked us. Can we say Greenland, Canada, Mexico, Venezuela, Panama. I am sure the list will get longer as I speak. It would deflate Putin too, because whatever Trump said or did would have no teeth unless the Red States funded it.
Let us see how long those elected officials would stay in office, even if they use the Autocrats playbook as laid out by Anne Applebaum in her book, "Autocracy, Inc." chapter 5.
--The author of "From Dictatorship to Democracy" Gene Sharp says that nonviolent protest is more effective because the dictators are always better armed, and one has to find their Achilles heal of weakness instead. One takes power, but peacefully through opposition to the leader.
--Modern autocrats prefer to smear than kill to avoid the martyrdom of a person
They prepare their smear and legal campaigns ahead of time. (this is Trump to a T)
--Still they do spot murdering to keep people in line, they don’t have to do mass killings to do that. A few journalists or activists. (Starting with immigrants in ICE facilities and ending up with us for refusing to partake in a CN theocracy)
--Dictators make laws that outlaw anything that is activism, but they don’t say it directly.
--Corruption accusations against activists often makes even friends wonder and turns people against them.
--Public despair comes after the crushing of a movement, especially if violence has been used.
We understand the tactics and Blue States need to lead the way away from Authoritarianism.
The Bulwark admitted they cribbed it from General Ben Hodges:
In the Army we called this “Butt-snorkeling”….
https://x.com/general_ben/status/1960459142726082689
yeah, it's not new, I'm just jealous that I didn't think to steal it first
someone on bluesky called them 'suckophants' and that's really good, too
https://bsky.app/profile/garibaldib.bsky.social/post/3lxfeyfevtk22
Hey, Ross Perot warned us about that “giant sucking sound!"
I miss Old Boss Ross.....He had quite the voice!! I'm not well today because I upchucked about a dozen times yesterday because of that CREEP SHOW special.
Pretty sure we have a cabinet of mouth breathers there the nose can only suck up so much before running out of the room.
I was sure Marquito was gonna have to bail!
But he knew he’d be headed south as the new ambassador to Uruguay if he did.
And ‘suckophants’ is the best yet for these buffoonishly fawning taint sniffers
"...buffoonishly fawning taint sniffers."
Masterful, Ole!
He should line his nostrils with Vick's Vaporub. That's what the cops do.
I was thinking the same! LOL!
That's why they're popping mints. Next, they'll be doing the medical examiner anti-gag trick - mentholated ointment slathered under the nose. 🤣
Right. I was looking for Rubio to produce a scented hankie and delicately bring it to his nose.
when I watched liddle marco, it looked like he stuck his thumb in his pocket, which is possibly lined with Vicks or some other foul scent cancelling substance and then straight to his nose.
I wouldn't be a bit surprised if some of them already use this tried and true remedy for foul smelling jobs
Haha BRUTALLY HONEST 👏👏👏
I still giggle out loud with the phrase "ass music."
I suppose one of Little Marco's "jobs" is to be the ablative armor to soak up the pricktator's rear-end salvos. He's taking one (or fifty) for the malevolent team.
The bruising,the farting,the swelling,sounds like diabetes, release the damn medical records along with the List.
Just keep shoving Big Macs and fries into his anus mouth. He dies and we don’t have to listen to his terminal blurtitis.
It won't be long.
Dear Lord, hear our prayer.
I’m going with tertiary syphilis.
Won’t happen., he’ll simply not be here one day Bruce!
I’m sure he and Hogsbreath have to go straight home and shower and dress again after 4 hours in the tRump miasma.
"Sheyna, they bought their tickets. They knew what they were getting into. I say, let 'em crash!"
Surely, "Airplane" quotes never get old.
"Yes, they do...and don't call me Shirley."
That ass music gas solubilizes in the grease on little Marco’s exterior. Like dissolves like.
good one!! outrageously funny!!
'Rear end salvos'..😆😅🤣😂
Do not be jealous Jeff! You are the master of smart-ass comments and we love it!! 😊
The way I see it, the invasion of one state by another is a call to state Governors to mobilize their National Guards to resist UNLAWFUL assault. Selective persecution by Trump of Blue states divides this nation. Also, the gerrymander fight is on. There is a new playbook. The old rules have been struck down by the Supreme Court. We need to change the gears here as fast as possible for deadly PREEMPTIVE strikes. Newsom has moved out on this already. Who is next? Hochul. Where are you? REVISE your Constitution. Pritzker. What are you doing?
https://hotbuttons.substack.com/p/gerrymander-fight?r=3m1bs
For gerrymandering corrections, Arizona seems ripe for the picking. Only 2 out of 8 House reps are Democrat in a 50-50 state (there is a vacant seat for number 9). Problem there (and in Wisconsin) is they have a huge majority Repub state legislature, itself created by gerrymandering Repub cheating, that would probably prevent this.
We lucked out here in Portland when Chavez De Remer was voted out as our representative. She served one term only. Thankfully. But then she failed up to Secretary of Labor. Good riddance to that butt snorkeler 🤮
Debbie, you couldn’t be more correct. We voted that bee-otch out of office because she was a liar, failed to deliver on promises she made and was a fucking MAGAT. That is, however, a prerequisite to being named to Shitler’s cabinet.
OMG. "Butt-Snorkelers". That's just too good. Too fucking good.
THAT’s what Marco needs, a snorkeling mask outfitted with an extra long 4’ tube that allows him to breathe air from a safe distance above the narcoleptic geezer’s low-hanging cloud of deadly ass-gas
I have no sympathy. He wanted it and wanted it badly. The Fart Fairy granted his wish.
I have no sympathy for Marco. He slithered on his belly to get the job!
I recall VP Mike Pence ass-snorkeling in term 1 and it didn’t turn out well for him. Guillotine on J6? The news media ought to replay both of these every day back-to-back.
That really is a good one. I'd be jealous too. Lololol!!!
All I know, is that it works for clean up of 3-day old roadkill in the hot Texas sun. How that might compare to the orange odoroferocity in an enclosed White House office, I can't guess.
Read that earlier. I knew immediately you'd be jealous.
Jeff - and this sure the fuck is not criticism - we didn't notice that little Marco stuck his hand in his pocket momentarily before sticking a finger in his nose. My other half noticed and immediately made the connection to the autopsy scene in Silence of the Lambs where the coroner, Clarice and the other FBI agent put some kind of salve-like material on to block the stench. A search failed to identify the material but lots of posts suggest it's Vicks.
Were I a meme or video person I'd make one of a WH dinner party at which every plate at the head table -except of course his - was adorned with a little jar of VIcks. Or maybe of ATurd Junior snorting some. Fertile minds, awake!!
After dealing (really not dealing well) with a family death, I turned here to see if I could possibly laugh for a few minutes. Bingo. I will read these again after feeling numb since it works. Sorry, but thanks Jeff. It hit the spot. 🙏🏻
My condolences, J.R. I'm doing the same here, except it's my dog (a worse loss than many of my family members, sad to say). Some of these substacks (Jeff, Andy Borowitz, etc.) can really help during these difficult times. Peace to you.
Can’t you just see how since each outburst of heartfelt, sincere praise must top the precious one, cabinet members are just itching to go next… the last one has to rip out their heart and present it to the fatfuck on a GOLDEN platter, then collapse with a rictus grin.
Such ass-kissing one has never seen before in this government.
Yes, it was seen in the first term. I remember being aghast at it.
I remember that well, the contestants(and, that is what they are) were required to tell T how great he was! Just sickening.
True dat Arne!
In All of Time in The History of The World😝
I wish he'd start rating their praises, and the one with the least drools gets "fired". Since he's living in his game show right now.
I LOVE this! I hope somebody shows this to him!
Like modern times gladiator! Fun for the libs! I'm all in. I need a good reality show with wine.
🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿
via a CRAP-TON of enabling…🔥
“Rictus grin,” use it twice and it’s yours for life.
Thank you, kind sir. I’ll sheath it in the scabbard until the time is ripe.
Dr. Sardonicus- 1958
That movie scared the shit outta me!
Neil that's some extreme shit, but it's God's own truth.
I mean, how do you top Wittkoff? Self-immolation?
Worth a try. “Rubio, are you listening?”
Ew.
What’s most astonishing is how psychologically and intellectually stunted every one of Trump’s enablers are. Most likely, they know enough history to have learned what happens when you get too close to sociopathic leaders. Have they forgotten Hitler’s betrayals of his own henchmen, Putin’s purges? Yet, these elevated MAGAts inflate their own importance while clinging to a vicious, cut-throat liar. Trump discards people without a glance and destroys them if he can. For now he lacks the power to murder his rivals outright, but he is openly maneuvering toward jailing, deporting, and interning people in camps at his whim. And still, his simple-minded enablers, sorely lacking a healthy sense of self-preservation, convince themselves they will prosper by serving his evil designs. They echo every lie, defend every abuse, and march forward like lemmings believing he will lead them somewhere beautiful. History tells us what really awaits if only you could ask the disciples of Hitler and Putin who once thought the same.
And surrounding him are the ones who made his rise possible; the Heritage Foundation operatives, the corrupt men on the Supreme Court, and his Republican and MAGA enablers in Congress and beyond. Together they have staged the largest, most grotesque carnival of lies, convincing their followers that anything is justified if it keeps them in power. There is no crime too blatant, no hatred too vile, no indecency too shameless, no destruction too sweeping for them to embrace in pursuit of their goal. Just as Hitler and Putin cloaked their ambitions in empty promises and non-stop, ruthless propaganda, these architects of Trumpism will stop at nothing to achieve and cling to dominance, dragging a nation toward ruin while pretending it is salvation. His mouthpieces happily repeat every absurd, pathological claim he makes while the truth is staring us in the face.
His minions have sacrificed their humanity for personal gain, power and the permission to abuse people of color. They are a scourge on our country and the entire world.
The biological scourge, the next pandemic, is coming with the assistance of "the shitty Kennedy" (thank you, Marc Maron!). The second-most orange creep is a carrion eater who takes his grandkids swimming in a sewage contaminated creek. He prides himself on destroying the capacity of the US to develop and administer vaccinations, but thinks autism is our Number 1 health issue.
Well said, Sarah! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I can't figure out if these sycophantic bootlickers are just trying to get their 15 minutes of fame or if the members of this daycare center of an administration only can only see 5 minutes ahead of them and can't realize they are committing political suicide. As I have stated before, history has shown us that this type of power grab always ends in disaster. The resistance is growing. IMHO the implosion is nigh.
Trump’s enablers don’t care what history will say. They’re too hooked on power, money, and the thrill of being close to him. They silence their creeping doubts, repeat his bizarre and blatant lies, and tell themselves they’ll be safe, even as history shows people like them always end up discarded or disgraced. They think they’re clever, but they’re just pawns, sleepwalking through the same delusion Hitler’s and Putin’s enablers one once had: that loyalty to a sociopath will somehow protect them. It never does.
They have no doubts. They are true believers. Just because you have a brain does not mean they do! Don't give them the benefit of doubt.
From your keyboard to Their ears, David.
I think the snorkelers are looking for their 15.minutes. They're betting they can get what they want and then bail before the boom is lowered. I devoutly wish that boom comes down early!
No one cares to be exiled as the world shrinks, is my take :/
Been thinking all along that both tRump and his cabinet are strictly just for show, while the heritage goons and s. miller are pulling the levers, so to speak. Apparently both noem and bondi take their marching orders from miller. Virtually all the cabinet heads were put in place to destroy or greatly diminish the very institutions and services they head. Feels coldly calculated. It's a "shitshow" by design.
Which begs the question: Why don’t DEMs have a war room & an army of lawyers combing 250 yr old documents for gray areas and loopholes… very strange indeed :/
You beat me to it, Michael!
Billionaire class warfare will provide them vast riches… the stable coin market , the death, and theft of the Federal Reserve appears imminent Michael!
I believe those Heritage Foundation operatives, along with others farther back in the shadows, are his handlers. It's a given that Pumpkin-Head isn't calling the shots, and even Miller has someone pulling his strings, IMO.
Yep
Vladimir Putin (Trump is TERRIFIED OF HIM)
Elon Musk (yes, still there)
Peter Thiel
JD Vance
Curtis Yarvin
Dark Enlightenment
Definitely, Robin, except I think JD is only one step above Rump in the pecking order. He's a useful tool, as well. And yes, I agree that Elon is still a presence, public feud to the contrary.
And IMO, those you list, powerful as they are, are only the front line. I think there are those still more removed from common knowledge who have been playing this chess board for decades, descendants of those who played in the '50s, and on back two centuries or further. Just my theory.
Totally agree Denise. I'm 69 and was really never political most of my life so I didn't realize what was going on, but I think it started 40-50 years with Reagan, Newt Gingrich, Leonard Leo, Heritage Foundation, Koch Brothers, Mitch McConnell etc. (All white Christian nationalist billionares) and the Silicon Valley tech bros are their evil spawn. And so we don't ever forget Epstein, I was reading some articles written about him years ago and on top of being a pedophile and pervert he courted scientists and even Stephen Hawkings. Brilliant minds. He was an early believer like the tech bros in transhumanism (living forever through tech), AI, creating a superior race with his "genius" sperm (like Elon). It's so troubling to think how intellectually brilliant and gifted so many of them are (elite schools. Science, math, law) but like anyrhing, you can have those goods and use them for good or evil. They chose evil...and then throw religion into the mix. They all had abusive childhoods (except for Zuck and Bezos) , all were scifi addicts and gamers, but they never made it to "empathy". They all think they are going to live forever with their tech, get rid of the rest of the riff raff (us) wait it out in their underground bunkers and private islands, then take over the world like the James Bond villaons they are.
I hadn’t known that history about Epstein. It figures.
I'm 67, and I've been political since high school, when we studied how Nixon won in '68, among other things. It's easy to see how the Rs have schemed all these years to get where they are.
But the chess board has existed for centuries, according to some of my reading. One example from fairly recent history: at the end of WWII, a naval officer was on a Pacific beach, looking over piles of materiel and equipment. He asked a nearby quartermaster where all the stuff was being shipped. His answer was: Korea. We regular people think things just happen or escalate over a matter of months or so, but the chess moves are planned years in advance.
It never ends well for those who suckle on the Fascist teets. I hope that part of history repeats itself.
Seeing these mushroom polishers trying to out-sycophant each other is truly nauseating and unfathomable. These people have not one iota of integrity or self respect. Just the sort to run the nation. Nice job, voters.
And it takes 💯 percent of them to buy into this abomination for it to happen. Every stinking traitorous Republicon MUST GO. The whole fucking party should be incarcerated.
Incinerated, not incarcerated
Well played, Joe!
👍👍👍
Every state officeholder, county, city - aah! it's a nice dream at least.
Caged in prisons like El Salvador, holding them all together in ONE cage. Or, we could petition to keep Alligator Alcatraz open to house them there
Total lack of self-respect. Don't they know the internet is forever? Trump is not.
These professional fellators will thankfully never serve in any public office ever again as the Internet will continue to remind the entire planet of their self flagellation and groveling before a farting, shitting, stinking urine-leaking monster. And their children will be tormented by the forever documentation of their parents cowardice and cynicism. Fuck all of these scumbags very much.
And they lack the vision or any trace of intellect that would allow them to realize it.
Speaking of professional fellators...where's Melania?
😂😂😂
😂👍
That, and the fact that most of them are mediocrities who never dreamed they'd rise so high.
“Mushroom polishers” is a great description!
Are the R podcast bros cool with this? I mean… seems unmanly?
The seating arrangement explained: Because the Secretary of State is the most prestigious member of the cabinet, he gets to sit at the right hand of God Awful. Because the Secretary of Defense/War is the second most prestigious member, he gets to sit at the left hand of His Satanic Majesty. Bring your gas mask!
Those imperial hands are beginning to look like they have a flesh-eating virus. The stench comes from all Trump's orifices and now his hands. Susie Wiles, Chief of Staff and Inner Sphincter to the Oval Orifice, probably arranges seating at these meetings.
Apologies to the great Tiedrich, but "Inner Sphincter to the Oval Orifice" wins the internet phrase of the day.
“Without doing a boom boom in his pants”! 🤣🤣🤣. That disgusting display yesterday was vomit inducing for sure. None of those people have any dignity.
And did you guys hear that the CDC is ceasing to actively monitor food pathogens because of budget cuts? Listeria with your chicken. I’m in my phone or would post the link.
I hate it here.
I have already sent Senator Kelly an email message stating that the CDC not monitoring foodborne bacteria outbreaks is CRIMINAL!!!
Bobby Brainworm continues to be the most dangerous man in the “Health industry.” Every week he destroys things that would save American lives. He is a criminal in EVERY sense of the word. His family should hire a hit man.
Maybe a GoFundMe for the hit man?
I'll do it pro Bono.
T. O. T. ——code for:
“take out t_ _ _ _”
Billboards, social media posts, banners on overpasses, etc. etc.
We need a patriot for real.
Perhaps a multi-purpose version, D.
Sirhan Sirhan could do it even though I wish that piece of ratfuck was now calcified and pushing up tulips.
Let’s not go there - suggesting hit men, I mean.
Mocking, instead of crying.
Gilded Age 2.0 is a terrible, terrible time.
These gold-plated hacks aren't building mansions or railroads or cultural centers. They're building crypto-scams, like Nutlick's Cantor-Fitzgerald is involved in. They're pushing government and oligarchic investment in defense corporations while pumping arms sales and military occupation of our cities. Fascism 2025.
Lutnik would love nothing more than to shift our entire economy to his stable coin Tether, criminal’s favorite flavor. It’s in the works. Talk about the implosion of the world banking system. 110% inflation anyone?
So scary, Melinda!
I think it's more "spray painted age 1.0"
Soo, after killing off folks by taking away vaccines, safety protocols for products, food safety, weather warnings, healthcare, and detention camps for the masses in every state. There's no workers/taxpayers left. How are they going to support their agendas? Really, I do not understand the endgame whatsover. They gonna just loot everything and live alone?
Agree, Lisa…Ive wondered the same thing. What’s left? AI isnt going to pick the strawberries.
AI will need to run on trillion dollar nuclear power plants because the energy consumption of those mega data centers is already exceeding the capacity of fossil fuel utilities and renewables. Republicans still can't see beyond horse and buggy policies, but focus on quarterly earnings.
You're right....and I just read this tragic story. What a nightmare. 😭
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2025/aug/27/chatgpt-scrutiny-family-teen-killed-himself-sue-open-ai
And yet...Melania has just posted an AI design challenge for children. As if generalized use of AI isn't problematic/hazardous enough!
I am so tired of that old Ho. Why can't she just shut up?
I hadn’t heard that. Sooooo misguided. 🤦♀️
Nor clean their toilets, nor cut their fucking grass. I hate it here.
You guys are late to the party. The billionaires are building their bunkers, staffing them with AI, filling them with phony food, because they all understand what the climate crisis means. No food, mass starvation, but they think they'll survive. The niece of my locker partner in high school works for some company on the peninsula that is creating fake meat, etc. She says don't eat it.
Emergency cleanup outside the cabinet meeting door, multiple vomitus, get there and stay there it gets worse.
It’s a scene out of Caligula in that methane and ass-smelling aggrandizement death cell.
🤣🤣
This country sucks ass like every sycophant sitting around Orange Caligula’s big conference table.
Yup. I cant even think of a word strong enough...
https://substack.com/@patricemersault/note/c-149327702
Wow. At least it will turn us all vegan. I suppose that's a good thing for the environment.
Just be sure to wash those vegetables well! Pathogens don't just come along for the ride with animal products.
THIS IS THE LINK. Thanks Derek. I googled more. NBC had this. https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/cdc-quietly-scaled-back-surveillance-program-foodborne-illnesses-rcna227089
Back to the 14th century.
They all puckered up to stand in line to kiss the enormous fat ass of the worst POtuS in American history!!! The Orange Monster stated yesterday at the massive ass kissing event that as the biggest POtuS in American history that he can do anything he wants! TOTAL BULLSHIT!!!
Seeing the Republicons and various MAGATS submit to the stench of Shitler is somehow, comforting. Liddle Marco and Shitler absolutely, positively, MUST be cell mates!
Those sycophants will never be able to scrub the shit stain off their noses for this embarrassing charade. Give them each a brown ribbon.
Kay, it’s going to stick to all there clothes and in the hair, that room had to stink like hell after four hours of permeation.
I hope they have to carry the stench for the rest of their lives.
Ribbons of shame 🤣
Absolutely. Stapled to their foreheads
Howie Nutlick shure likes licking the sweat off of Dear Leader's nut sack:-) As do the rest of the Circle Jerk.
Trump’s balls aren’t going to lick themselves.
😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
Best line ever 😂😂😂😂😂
OMG! 🤢🤮🤮☠️
During the reign of Henry VIII, street ballads called him King Littleprick. An apt name for the Feral Fart Factory, don't you think?
And....Henry VIII also eventually stank mightily, due to, um, deterioration from syphilis, according to my reading.
He had leg ulcers, very probably as a result of diabetes. Those ulcers stank.
I didn't want to go into detail, because...yuck. But although, to me, diabetes seems a more probable cause, I've read that they were late-stage-syphilis lesions.
It is likely that both theories are true. He was a pig, much like Trump.
Oh, yes, he certainly was. In fact, several months ago, I was watching "A Man for All Seasons" (Robert Shaw version), and it struck me even more powerfully than it had before, how much Rump is like Henry. Thoroughly despicable characters, both of them. Except Henry was much more learned and accomplished.
Sadistic madmen, both of them. Trump wants be be an absolute monarch like Henry.
He had syphilis, leg ulcers, and gout.
Nice summary of yesterday's insanity The young lady throwing up in her mouth photo is just like me, but I'm an old lady throwing up in her mouth. Every damn day. I can't believe I'm saying this again, but every day is worse than the one before. How much can we take?
So I’m sure MSM is crickets, good on Jeff to get on it.
Probably the only meeting Donnie stays awake for lest he miss one of his toadies praising his miserable, orange, fart infested self. It's fucking embarrassing.
More than embarrassing. It's a condemnation of this nation to tolerate this garbage.
Could you imagine what would happen to them if Joe Biden or Kamala Harris held a Cabinet meeting like this?
Maladministration 2.0, brought to you by Taney Court 2.0 and the support of Americans like these toadstools!
If Obama or Biden or Harris were to do anything remotely close to what the pricktator is doing Faux news would be 24/7 calling for impeachment, treason and a firing squad. Waters would be mumbling incoherently with his shit eating grin, Ingraham would have her panties tied in a knot with her slappable face, Pirro would have her box wine right on her desk and Hannity would be dead because his head would have completely blown off his shoulders.
Not only that, but Pam Bondi And Congress would be re-investigating it and relitigating it like they’re doing now by going after people from the 2016 election
The Mango Mussolini can always depend on his Depends, but what about the rest of his Cabinet members when it’s getting close to hour four in the meeting? Can’t imagine the agony.
I had a comment, but then I saw this line from Mrs. Spouse across your room "ALL THE PRESIDENT'S BUTT-SNORKELERS" and I laughed so hard I TOTALLY forgot what I was going to say!
Hes the bestest fuckwit because he has orgs like Rockbridge and fucking American Moment behind him. Weve done a full pull through on all their shit, EINs, org IDs, etc. And its some scary shit. And the worse part about it? They all know Trump is at Death's Door, and we Trumper Fuckwit AssMunch dies and leave the seat....then the REALLY Dark shit happens.
https://thistleandmoss.com/p/why-are-we-not-talking-about-this
True.