MAGA now hates Jim Jordan, and it’s fucking hilarious

Shirt Sleeve Jimmy has a very bad weekend

MAGA is a 24/7 perpetual grudge factory. MAGA is about settling scores. it’s what nourishes MAGA. it sustains them — and right at the top of MAGA’s list of scores to settle is revenge for what the Deep State did to God-Emperor for Life Donald Trump.

oh, the Democrats impeached Dear Leader twice? well, we’re going to impeach the shit out of Sleepy Brandon — three times. just you wait and see.

of course, that’s not going to happen now. there was never a case for impeaching Joe Biden. there was no crime, and there was no evidence — it was all just a bunch of Russian disinformation that Jim Jordan and Comer Fudd swallowed hook, line and sinker.

after fifteen months of one public humiliation after another, the Jimmys finally folded up their circus tent, piled into the clown car, and slunk out of town, as it were, under the cover of darkness.

so let’s check in on MAGA and see how they’re coping with the utter fucking collapse of their dream.

Steve Bannon, former President Trump’s 2016 campaign executive, railed against House Republicans on Monday, claiming they “want MAGA to go away” and wish to see the former president lose his 2024 White House bid.

“Why does [Ohio GOP Rep. Jim Jordan] not have a criminal conspiracy investigation — from Fani Willis in Georgia to ‘Big Tish James’ in New York City?” Bannon asked on his “War Room” podcast. 

holy shit, putrefying meat-bag Steve Bannon is fucking pissed at the shouty half-dressed degenerate wrestling coach.

given this context, the clip that’s going around of Bannon yammering about “Polly Pockets Jordan” now makes sense.

“you are worthless, Jim Jordan. you are worthless, Polly Pockets Johnson. worthless.”

Shitbag Steve has had it up to here with Shirt Sleeve Jimmy. he failed at impeaching Joe Biden. he failed at stopping the prosecutions of Dear Leader — and in the minds of MAGA, this can only mean one thing: House Republicans are fucking up on purpose. they want to lose.

logic is not MAGA’s strong suit.

it’s not like Jimmy Jords didn’t try to interfere with all of the Trump trials. he’s sent out a billionty angry letters to Alvin Bragg, Fani Willis and Letitia James, demanding ANSWERS! NOW!

the problem is that as a member of the House, Jimmy has no jurisdiction over state criminal trials. he can’t do shit. he can threaten all he wants, but all he’s going to get in return is a very public spanking.

useless pantload Jim Jordan is learning the hard way that you absolutely do not fuck with Fani “Yours In Service” Willis.

Jordan, you’ll recall, is trying his best to interfere with Willis’s Big Georgia Election Fuckery Trial, demanding that Fani produce documents no later than yesterday.

what Fani did instead was to yours-in-service the shit out of Shouty Jim.

Prosecutor to Jim Jordan: ‘You lack a basic understanding of the law’

Fani Willis could’ve simply ignored Jim Jordan. Instead, the prosecutor told the Judiciary Committee chairman that he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

to be fair, Jim Jordan lacks a basic understanding of how to dress himself, so can we really expect him to have a basic understanding of the law?

but MAGA doesn’t give a fuck about any of that. MAGA wants results, and they don’t want to hear any bullshit about jurisdictions, or what’s legal. just get the fucking job done, Jimbo.

Jim went on Fox News yesterday to try to do a little damage control. it did not go well.

Maria Bartiromo: “look, I mean at this point, American citizens are asking ‘what can you do about it?’ I mean, look, with all due respect people are sick and tired of congressional investigations that go nowhere. people are sick and tired of letters being written and sent to the people who we know are bad in the first place. they want you to do something about it. you’re an elected official.”

Jimmy retreated to the comfort of not-twitter, to try to get back into MAGA’s good graces by doing a little rage-farming about the indictment of fake electors in Arizona.

“Indicting former chiefs of staff and lawyers for President Trump is banana republic craziness. What happened to our country?”

but MAGA was not going to let Jim off the hook.

“Imagine if you were in a position of power to do anything about it….. Keep posting on X. That seems to be working.”

here’s Gunther Eagleman™, which is definitely not a made-up name.

“Our @HouseGOP has no fcking balls whatsoever is what happened.”

Tom Renz had an earful for Shouty Jim.

“Our elected officials sold out instead of standing for us. Instead of standing for good legislation they compromised with the dems and refused to hold the sellouts accountable. Instead of taking actions they held hearings. Instead of telling truth they lie for lobbyists. And worst, instead of listening to t the people they are supposed to represent they stand for big money that puts its own interests ahead of those of the American people. Any other questions?”

hey, here’s a fun fact about Tom Renz: he believes that Hunter Biden created covid.

I expect we will be seeing a lot on this in coming days/weeks but wanted to provide some context. At this point it appears that Hunter Biden was at least indirectly involved in the creation of SARS-COV2. Think about the gravity of that statement and then consider if that explains the continued cover-up. Let me explain.

these are the people Jim Jordan is trying to please: crackpots and lunatics — and there’s no pleasing them. nitwits who honestly believe that Hunter Biden and his freakishly oversized trouser hog are responsible for a worldwide pandemic are not going to be mollified by a “well, we tried. we sent out letters and everything. whatcha gonna do?”

no, Jim. fuck you. you did this on purpose. you want to lose. Steve Bannon told me so.

that MAGA has turned on Jim Jordan is super fucking hilarious because Jim Jordan is MAGA. he’s totally down with the Trump agenda. he refused to certify the 2020 election. he’s an insurrectionist. he helped plan January 6th. he blew off subpoeanas. he begged for a pardon.

but none of that matters now. MAGA hates your guts, Jim. you have failed MAGA, and you have failed Dear Leader.

MAGA is the monster that Jim Jordan helped create, and it has a hunger for crazy that can never be satisfied.

you’re a fucking failure, Jim Jordan, and you’re now just another score to settle.