let’s watch as Democratic senators rip Bobby Brainworms several new ones
scenes from a batshit Senate hearing
Bobby Brainworms — Donny Convict’s Secretary of Dying of a Preventable Disease — is what would happen if ‘I did my own research’ became a real boy.
he’s not a doctor. he’s not a scientist. he has no training in the field of healthcare. he doesn’t even know how germs work, and he doesn’t care. he’s just a total fucking crackpot.
Bobby Brainworms’ batshit beliefs about healthcare and medicine are no more credible that those of the loudmouth drunk at the end of the bar. in fact, they’re less credible — because the loudmouth drunk at the end of the bar might be an actual doctor.
yesterday, the Esteemed Secretary Brainworms testified before the Senate Finance Committee, and Democrats — along with a few Republicans — had some righteous fun using Bobby as a chew toy.
let us count all the ways in which Bobby Brainworms is unqualified for his job. first of all, Bobby is a compulsive liar.
Senator Tina Smith: “last week, in the days after the tragic shooting in my home state of Minnesota, you went on Fox News blaming school shootings on anti-depressants.”
Brainworms: “no.”
Smith: “you have no evidence of that, because you have no evidence of a connection.”
Brainworms: “you’re just making stuff up ... I never said that.”
Smith: “I am not making that up.”
fact check: the senator is in fact not making that up.
“we’re launching studies on the potential contribution of some of the SSRI drugs and some of the other psychiatric drugs that might be contributing to violence.”
that was Bobby on Fox News, just last week. I guess the worms in his brain must have eaten that particular memory. maybe we need to be holding a Worm Brain Telethon to fund research into poor Bobby’s memory issues.
but really, this is nothing new. Bobby lies all the time. he lies as easily as he wheezes like some fucked-up Darth Vader. he even lies under oath.
second of all, Bobby’s abysmally ignorant.
Senator Mark Warner: “do you accept the fact that a million Americans died from covid?”
Brainworms: “I don’t know how many died.”
Warner: “you’re the Secretary of Health and Human Services. you don’t have any idea how many Americans died from covid?”
Brainworms: “I don’t think anybody knows that, because there was so much data chaos coming out of the CDC.”
Warner: ‘how can you be that ignorant?’
spoiler alert: Bobby can be that ignorant because he doesn’t fucking care. like Dear Leader, Bobby knows what he knows, and he’s going going to let stupid things like facts change his pre-existing narrative.
I guarantee you that Bobby spends more time in tanning salons than he does researching data.
fact check: dude looks like he’s made of beef jerky.
thirdly, Bobby’s incoherent.
Senator Bill Cassidy: “do you agree with me that President Trump deserves a Nobel Prize for Operation Warp Speed?”
Brainworms: “yeah, absolutely.”
Cassidy: “but you just told Senator Bennet that the covid vaccine killed more people than covid.”
let’s be clear: Senator Cassidy is a Republican and he is not our friend. fuck him for his ludicrous belief that Dear Leader deserves a Nobel Prize for anything — and fuck him all the way to the moon for voting to confirm Brainworms in the first place. Bill Cassidy is a doctor and he knew better.
but he’s right to point out that Brainworms contradicts himself as easily as he lies.
lastly, and most importantly, Bobby Brainworms is a menace to society.
Senator Raphael Warnock: “it is clear that you are carrying out your extremist beliefs.”
Brainworms: “you are the sickest people on earth. how am I a threat?”
Warnock: “Secretary Kennedy, for the first time, we are seeing deaths of children from measles. we haven’t seen that in two decades. we’re seeing that under your watch. you are a hazard to the health of the American people.”
fact check: fuck yes he is.
awesome job, Bobby.
and now he’s on track to Make Polio Great Again. take a victory lap, pal.
oh wait — here’s another fun fact about Bobby Brainworms: he’s a fucking idiot.
the clip below isn’t from yesterday’s hearings. it’s from a recent episode of roasted ball-sack aficionado Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson’s barely-watched podcast — and it’s a steaming mug of holy shit.
“we need to stop trusting the experts ... trusting the experts is not a feature of science or democracy, it's a feature of religion and totalitarianism.”
oh my god, what kind of up-is-down-black-is-white bullshit is this?
not to put too fine a point on this, but WE TRUST THE EXPERTS BECAUSE THEY’RE FUCKING EXPERTS — and we don’t trust dead-bear-cub-kidnapping weirdos, because they’re crackpots.
why do we even have dictionaries any more, since words now apparently mean whatever the Mad King and his merry band of sewer clowns say they mean?
and oh look, Fox News dragged out the director of the National Institutes of Health — some yutz who was hand-picked for his job by Bobby himself — to ‘corroborate’ Brainworms’ nonsense.
Jay Bhattacharya: “what Secretary Kennedy is doing is aligned with what the scientific evidence says. aligned with common sense. look, we’re not anti-science. what we are instead is devoted to the scientific method.”
what scientific method is Bobby devoted to? ‘let’s chainsaw the head off a dead whale and see what happens?’
is that the scientific method? because we already know the answer: dead whale juice sprays all over your children while you’re driving around with the head strapped to your roof.
“Every time we accelerated on the highway, whale juice would pour into the windows of the car, and it was the rankest thing on the planet,” Kathleen Kennedy recalls. “We all had plastic bags over our heads with mouth holes cut out, and people on the highway were giving us the finger, but that was just normal day-to-day stuff for us.”
Bobby Brainworms Jr, ladies and gentlemen. let’s give a round of applause to the father of the year.
in any sane world, Bobby would now be resigning in embarrassment over the ritual humiliation he received yesterday. of course, in any sane world, Bobby would never have been confirmed by the Senate. let’s back it up further: in any sane world, he would never have been nominated by the president.
but of course, in any sane world, a 34-count convicted narcoleptic fart factory criminal wouldn’t have been elected in the first place — and right now I’d be writing a post about all the awesome shit President Kamala did yesterday. sigh.
but we don’t live in that timeline. we live in the shitty one, where Bobby Brainworms will never resign, because he’s an arrogant prick who thinks he’s entitled to destroy healthcare in America — and Donny will never fire him, because he thinks Mister Make Chainsawed Whale Heads Great Again is doing a totes awesome job.
reporter: “do you have full confidence in what RFK is doing?”
Donny: “well, I didn’t get to watch the hearings today, and— but he’s uh, a very good— person? and he means very well, and he’s got some little different ideas. I guarantee you a lot of the people at this table like RFK Jr, and I do. uh, but he’s uh, he’s got a different take— we want to listen to all of those takes, but I heard he did very well today. but it’s not your standard, uh, it’s not your standard talk, I would say, and that has to do with medical, and vaccines. but if you look at what’s going on in the world, with health, and look at this country also, so with regard to health, I like the fact that he’s different. okay?”
I’m sorry, they can slather all the makeup they want onto this guy, and they can prop him up in a chair, with his rotting hands hidden under the table, but he’s still a mess.
does Sundowning Grandpa Befuddlepants have any idea what he’s blithering about? it’s like listening to a fifth grader try to fake his way through an oral report on a book he didn’t read.
‘… and so if you have courage, they give you a red badge, and that’s why everyone should read The Red Badge of Courage.’
once again, as Jesus wisely counseled us in his Sermon on the Mount, ‘blessed are the meme makers, for they shall win the internet’ — so let me leave you with this thought for today:
here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
830 / 919
true story: when our daughter was a child, in the 1990s, we would regularly rent a house for a couple of weeks every summer in Hyannisport, a short walk down the beach from the Kennedy compound. shut up, I earned a decent living back when I was in advertising. anyway, one day Ms Spouse and daughter were walking on the beach when they ran into a couple of Kennedy children, who had a cormorant with a wounded wing with them. "Uncle Bobby found this," they said. "he has a lot of wounded birds."
so there you have it. wounded birds are a slippery slope that leads to chainsawed whale heads.
Mean while, Over in Washington, Kegseth DrunkBitch is conspiring to put into action, and I quote "By shifting from "defense" to "war," these ass-clowns are reprogramming our collective consciousness to embrace perpetual conflict as our natural state.”
https://thistleandmoss.com/p/when-fascist-fuckwits-fetishize-war
Always Uncle Jeff, Lkd/ReS/Qted/XPosted