let's check in on unserious rake-stepping dipshit Jim Jordan
America’s least-loved shouty half-dressed degenerate wrestling coach held another of his tiresome hearings last week
let us now savor the sweet THWAP! of dorky doofus Jim Jordan stepping on the latest in a long series of rakes.
America’s least-loved shouty half-dressed degenerate wrestling coach held another of his tiresome hearings last week. you’ll be forgiven if this the first you’re hearing of it, because the media pretty much ignored it. as well they should have.
this time, Gym brought along some whistleblowers — honest-to-god real whistleblowers, not the imaginary James Comer kind — and oh boy, were they going to blow the living fuck out of some whistles. Jordan’s vaunted whistleblowers were there to prove finally and beyond any doubt that the FBI was unfairly targeting conservatives.
there was just one problem.
the whistleblowers were not whistleblowers in any sense of the word.
The first three of these witnesses whose testimony Jordan received were not really “whistleblowers,” but disaffected former FBI employees receiving financial backing from former President Trump’s ally and advisor Kash Patel. None of them have been given whistleblower protection status by the Department of Justice.
THWAP!
no, these were not whistleblowers at all. these former FBI agents were a motley collection of cranks, malcontents and conspiracy loons, all of whom had lost their security clearances and been tossed out on their ears for being, let’s charitably put it, a bit shit at their jobs.
Friend was suspended by the FBI after refusing to participate in cases related to the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol. He was also one of three agents who had their security clearances revoked by the FBI, in his case for having “espoused an alternative narrative about the events at the U.S. Capitol” and downloading documents to “an unauthorized removable flash drive.”
THWAP!
it gets better:
When reporters asked Jordan about the financial ties of his sources, the congressman deflected. “They’ve got a family! How are they supposed to feed their family?”
THWAP!
as usual, Democrats came loaded with embarrassing facts.
During questioning, Rep. Gerry Connolly (D- Va.) displayed tweets from the witnesses espousing conspiracy theories about the Capitol riot, including that undercover federal agents had been responsible for the attack.
THWAP!
but my favorite quote comes from this Republican, who said that
broadcasting the committee’s work “on live television would make us look like morons.”
gee, d’ya think?
THWAP!
oh Jim Jordan, you are so fucking bad at this. maybe it’s time for you to go on Fox News and change the subject.
YESSSSS! ANOTHER HILLARY INVESTIGATION!
what a fucking idiot.
It's like they keep on one upping themselves on The Stupid.
It's what I love, and yet what frustrates me, about these MAGA numbskulls. They're all so desperate to shore up their own beliefs with anything at all, that they'll believe anything at all, and start spouting it out like gospel without even doing the tiniest bit of "Is this real???" research.
And time after time, they wind up looking foolish because their gullibility factor is off the charts.
Still, it's fun to watch though.