King Fuckface the First finally gets his crown
and, as always, We the People get jack shit
South Korea was yesterday’s stop on Donny Convict’s Nice Country You Got Here, Where’s My Swag tour — and oh boy, did they ever know what to give the gold-obsessed old shitwit: a fucking crown.
interpreter: “this a key artifact that represents the Silla dynasty, the first Korean kingdom to unite the Korean Peninsula. this gold crown is the largest and most extravagant of the six existing crowns from the Silla period. we present this gold crown to you on this joyous occasion of your state visit.”
Donny: “thank you very much.”
a crown — and not just any crown, but the ‘largest and most extravagant’ one. boy, South Korea really did their How To Manipulate A Dumbfuck President homework, didn’t they?
do you think Donny even realizes that what they gave him was a replica?
here’s a fun fact: the Silla dynasty ultimately fell because they fucking sucked.
The Silla Dynasty and the United Silla came to an end in 935 in part as a result of increasing corruption and the oppression of its people.
corruption and oppression — tell me, does that sound like anyone we know? so yeah, awesome job with the symbolism there, South Korea, whether intentional or not.
Donny, naturally, was over the moon about his new bauble. of course he was. he’s an easily-manipulated child. every world leader and every corporate CEO knows this. give this simpleton some vulgar toy and he’s putty in your hands.
as I sit here typing, Donny’s on Fuckface Force One, flying back to the US. I’ll bet he’s wearing that ludicrous crown right now.
‘hey Melania, look at me. I’m the king.”
‘shod de fog up, Donal.’
here’s what South Korea got in return for their fake golden headpiece — because, as always, one hand washes the other.
South Korea will be building its Nuclear Powered Submarine in the Philadelphia Shipyards, right here in the good ol’ U.S.A. Shipbuilding in our Country will soon be making a BIG COMEBACK. Stay tuned!!! President DJT
this announcement had actual experts scratching their heads and going ‘I’m sorry, nuke subs are being built where the fuck now?’
David Burbach is an Associate Professor of National Security Affairs at the US Naval War College, so I’m going to presume he knows his shit. here’s what he had to say.
“what? There’s no naval shipyard in Philadelphia at all, let alone one that can handle the specialized needs of submarines, or of building nuclear propulsion systems.”
is that bad, when a president, lost and wandering in an ever-thickening fog of dementia, is announcing impossible agreements?
now, it’s true that Philadelphia once had a naval shipyard — in fact, it was our nation’s first — but it was decommissioned twenty-five years ago. it’s now a corporate park and tourist attraction.
it’s also true that the South Korean corporation Hanwha bought a shipyard that’s next to the old Philly Navy Yard, but — well, over to you, Politico.
In a social media post, Trump said the submarine will be built at Hanwha Philly Shipyard, a commercial yard purchased by a South Korean company in 2024. The shipyard is not currently equipped to handle nuclear material or build military ships, given that it’s a strictly commercial facility.
okay, but can’t the South Koreans modify their Philly shipyard to handle nuke tech and build military ships? sure, maybe someday, years from now — if ever.
The deal, and the surprising construction location, call into question how long it will take to get the facility ready for this kind of highly specialized and sensitive work that requires a trained and skilled workforce — and how much it will cost to completely overhaul the facility.
on top of that, there are training, staffing, security and supply chain concerns.
so what the fuck just happened, then? did Donny get played by South Korea? did he have any idea what he was agreeing to?
what happened is that Donny got himself a ginormous golden crown, and then said ‘yes’ to whatever cockamamie scheme was proposed to him.
remember: Preznit Fuckwit lives in a state of Permanent Right Now. he doesn’t give a shit what happens tomorrow, as long as he’s hogging all the attention today. Donny got exactly what he wanted: an impressive-sounding deal that he could fart out on his crappy app, and generate a thousand favorable headlines.
above all, Donny got to strut around and declare, I’m the Deal King.
never mind that so much of what Donny announced makes no sense, once you get into the nuts and bolts of it.
does Donny give one shit if the Hanwha shipyard ever produces one single thing? oh please, the dilapidated dumbfuck has already forgotten about it.
look, we’ve been down this road before, with Donny making promises based on fever-swamp fairy tale nonsense.
In 2018, President Donald Trump came to southeast Wisconsin to proclaim the coming of “the eighth wonder of the world.”
That “eighth wonder” was a sprawling new manufacturing plant, to be built in Mount Pleasant by a giant Taiwanese tech company called Foxconn, which promised to hire more than 13,000 local people to build high-definition TV screens.
Local and state officials said it would be the beginning of a technological renaissance in the area, which they planned to call “Wis-con Valley.”
now, spoiler alert:
It never happened.
of course it never happened. President Permanent Today never followed through, and Foxconn was never serious about actually building anything in Wisconsin. and you’ll never guess why they ‘promised’ to build in America in the first place.
Tabak pointed something out from President Trump’s first term that could ring true today.
“Keep in mind that [foreign companies] were being threatened with a lot of tariffs. And [Foxconn wasn’t] the only Asian company that came into the White House and said, ‘We want to spend lots of money in the United States.’ And that was a very welcome message for the Trump Administration,” he said.
Donny got played by a country that wanted a favorable tariff deal. does any of that sound familiar to you? because here’s the other thing that South Korea got out of Donny yesterday.
“South Korea has agreed to pay the USA 350 Billion Dollars for a lowering of the Tariff’s charged against them by the United States.”
oh, for fuck’s sake. here we go again — and mind you, this ‘deal’ is not a signed agreement. it’s just one more sketch of a concept of a framework for discussions. all this could change tomorrow.
but for today, Donny got what he wanted: favorable headlines. oh yeah, and that other thing.
what did We the People get out of this deal? jack shit, as always.
here are your heroes of the day: the Heretic Coffee Shop in Portland, Oregon.
PORTLAND, Ore. (KATU) — As hundreds of thousands of Oregonians face food uncertainty with the SNAP benefits cut for at least the month of November, a Portland coffee shop is helping people out by providing food to people in need.
In just about 48 hours, Heretic Coffee has raised over $72,000. Owner Josh White said the donations aren’t just coming in from Oregon either.
“Almost every single person who has come in has ordered coffee and then donated money for someone else’s food. This morning, the very first person who came in bought 10 snap breakfasts,” White said.
what kind of shithole country forces small business to step up and provide services to the needy, because an uncaring government won’t? ours, lucky us.
if you wish to donate to help Heretic feed folks who are about to lose their SNAP benefits, you can go here.
in a world of Donny Convicts and Holy Mike Johnsons, be a Heretic Coffee Shop.
here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
885 / 974
typo in the headline. awesome job, jeffrey. take a victory lap
Gotta hand it to South Korea. With the fake Silla Dynasty crown they both convincingly flattered that shallow dipshit and simultaneously trolled him