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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing Shit Shit—

"Carney's new love-in with European Union has everything to do with Trump"

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/ck0e3rnxev27o

"'Wouldn't it be lovely if Canada was the 28th state of the European Union rather than the 51st state of the United States?' asked Finland's President Alexander Stubb this summer."

how lovely, all of our former allies are getting along just fine without us. heck of a job, Donny

Wendy The Druid 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

Here Jeff, let me make you laugh.

Michael Tomasky says the Mango Mussolini may be literally drooling by November, and honestly? Weekend at Bernie's was more convincing. This is a idiot who claimed credit for personally stopping hurricanes, bragged about crowd sizes that empty seats disproved, and installed gold toilets like Slimer redecorating a Ramada. And every gutless Republicant still calling him a stable genius should be handed a fucking mop, to clean up after him.

https://thistleandmoss.com/p/get-fuckin-ready-for-the-drool-watch-a-white-nationalist-on-florida-s-ballot-maga-money-in-the-queer

HI2thDoc's avatar

Speaking of Weekend at Bernie's:

They wheeled Mitch in

With a frozen half grin

He didn't speak or move

And did nothing to prove

He wasn't a stuffed terrapin

Lady Emsworth's avatar

As somebody said "Suffering from rigor tortoise. . ."

Richard Von Busack's avatar

The Tortoise and the Rainbow (Bridge): "Don't bury me...I'm not dead!"

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Stephen Brady's avatar

But, you have to admit the taxidermist did a pretty good job!

Bob Bowden's avatar

Maybe Mitch can take a cue from Nick Cage’s character in Leaving Las Vegas, and father a turtle on the way out. And between fathering the turtle and completing his escape from this mortal coil, he can join Kash Patel’s beastality-accepting FBI

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

They just put his HUMAN SUIT back on him, so they could wheel him out, to - FINALLY - take him to the CORONER.

Bob Bowden's avatar

Even though they dressed him in a suit, Mitch is but a shell of his former self

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Did you see what they did to Mitch McConnell? That will be Trump. Wheeled around with a pasted on grin but with a whole phalanx of blond women keeping the press from getting anywhere close.

Kay-El's avatar

Eventually Chuck Grassley too.

DrBDH's avatar

“Republicant”! Next you’ll be calling them “skin jobs.”

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

I've taken to calling them "ReTHUGliCUNTS".

Marc Wallace's avatar

I’ve been calling them Repuls-icans for as long as I’ve been calling youknowwho TheMAGAt.

Stephen Brady's avatar

By the way, Donnie Doorknob didn't write that interminable screed against the SCOTUS. It contains full sentences... I'm sure Nattie is the poster in chief now, because when he speaks on camera it is constant word salad and dangling participles and everything else.

DrBDH's avatar

Someone should run these screeds thru an AI detector, asking “Is this Trump, Natalie, Miller or AI?”

rlritt's avatar

I think he has always had someone transcribing his rants to Twitter or Truth Social. He never speaks that coherently.

rlritt's avatar
28mEdited

I would approve of that.

Isolating the USA has been Putin's plan all along. That's why he encouraged his friend Don to get elected President.

Major Kong's avatar

At least the U.S. still has Russia, North Korea, and Argentina in its corner.

PEACE, LOVE, RESIST's avatar

Apparently, the house voted to end the Iran war, although this measure doesn’t legally halt the war on its own. Republicans joined Dems to put this through which is noteworthy.

Mike Sirota's avatar

Epstein Files anyone?

Jo's avatar

Maybe that has something to do with the FBI hiring exceptions being proposed?

HH Mohr's avatar

Before Nov, image and seconds-long video clip showing Dumby & Epstein together, caption, "Dumby & Epstein were BFFs" should pop up everywhere. No explanation needed.

Fastball Fredo's avatar

Jeff, I watched the Sec. Treasury Chucklehead Bissent lie in committee yesterday. Question posed to Bessent after he stated we are taking in billions from Venezuela. Where is the money? Is it going into our Treasury? Answer is No. Is it going to another department like State? I don’t know he says… Well where is that money going? I don’t know.. Jeff it’s going to an off shore account with a cut out to receive the money and transfer to Donald.. IMHO.. And the testimony from Kash yesterday and all those lies, entitlement, arrogance… Fire that guy and….. that poor horse he rode in on🤮Best to All, especially those with animals that are in Kash’s words… victims…

HI2thDoc's avatar

If America could be embodied in corporeal form for just a few minutes, either as Uncle Sam or the Statue of Liberty, I am sure he/she would kick the living shit out of trump and all his evil stooges for what they have done to our union.

Leu2500's avatar

Isn't it going to some bank account in the Middle East?

Fastball Fredo's avatar

I heard a third party recently formed company opened an account in the Bahamas for this revenue. So the 3rd party skims and I’m sure Donald does also… How about the American people… how about the Venezuela people?

Caelesto's avatar

The article titled "Kash Patel defends FBI’s new policy on bestiality at Senate hearing" came up on my computer first thing this morning and I was just like.... wut..... Seriously, what a time to be alive lol.

Clint Opine's avatar

These guys are driving The Onion out of business

Bob Bowden's avatar

Who could have predicted The Onion would someday read like a sanewashed version of reality?

Cheryl from Maryland's avatar

FYI, why is there a specific carve-out for those who have been forced into sex acts with animals? Wouldn't a general carve-out for victims of sexual abuse count? Or does this apply, as Senator Kennedy said, to the animals? My first thought was that it seems very specific, Kash Patel. One wonders what you and your girlfriend do to pass the time in rural Tennessee.

Joyce's avatar

Is the girlfriend just a beard?

Stephen Brady's avatar

Yeah - Kash's real love has a beard and is a Billy Goat.

Joyce's avatar

Ka$h introduces him at parties as his old college buddy, William Capra Hircus.

rlritt's avatar
24mEdited

Who hasn't been so drunk that you have eyed your neighbor's Great Dane with lust. It happens. Doesnt make you weird or anything.

Linda Weide's avatar

Yesterday both Dean Blundell and Zev Shalev were talking about it in their Substacks, but I decided that other things were more interesting. Today, now that I have read what Jeff has to say, I find this absolutely awful. Add to that Donald's usual tantrum-my behavior and we are just saying the bar for men in this administration is so low we cannot limbo under it.

Bonnie Boyce's avatar

I was thinkin' the same thing! One would normally have to visit the brothers from "Deliverance" to meet a man of the caliber serving in the tRump administration.

Victoria Wilson's avatar

Yes this administration’s theme song should be”Dueling Banjos” lol

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Those wildly insane, googly eyes were a dead fucking giveaway, yet Patel has been cut endless slack despite being certifiably nuts. Maybe we should examine his own proclivities regarding bestiality. He threw his tech money at Trump's campaign while he was writing "The Plot Against the King (Trump)," a slobbering fantasy intended for CHILDREN (8 - 11) in which he refers to himself as Cash the Knight and Kash the Distinguished Discoverer. Why was he targeting kids as allies? He's screamingly unqualified to hold any job and yet ... Director of the FBI.

rlritt's avatar

He has all the qualities that Trump demands in an employee.....must be dumber than Trump, questionable character and be really incapable of doing the job you were hired for. Add to that, willingness to act like a fool and lie like a rug when in court under oath. Kash gets straight A's in Trump's mind.

Diana's avatar

It’s quite a head shaking moment ‼️

rlritt's avatar

I think we have been cast into an alternate universe where and ignorant game show host is President of the US and, he appoints criminals and nitwits to important goverment jobs. At least I'm not alone here.

Gretchen's Mom 2025's avatar

I'm trying to invent a scenario where a human being (or what passes for that these days) can be victimized by animal who has sex with them. I get the other way around, but ..... I also want to know how an animal can 'force' a person into the sex act. No, forget that. I don't.

Unfortunately, I can tell that my over analytical brain will stay on this for a while. There is a first time for everything and possibly psychedelic drugs should be on today's agenda. Is the goddess laughing or crying at us? Hard call.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

GOATS! I'll never eat yogurt again!

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

Fun fact - in September of 2024 the Kennedy Center reported $691 million in assets and a yearly profit on $40 million dollars.

I bet every penny is now in a Trump bank account.

Susan Niemann's avatar

There isn’t a writer alive who could make this shit up. It’s all so bizarre and unbelievable. Can you imagine a movie of this era? In real life it’s not plausible… but yet here we are..🤦‍♀️

At least support for the governor and the felon is dropping in Missouri.

Beautiful color on Ms Spouse. Great photos.

Linda Weide's avatar

I am still finding it hard to get over what Kash Patel is saying about bestiality. I assume there is a very specific reason for this change to allow people who engage in bestiality to work in the FBI. I wonder what if he is telling us something about his own behavior. Yikes!

Susan Niemann's avatar

It defies reason, Linda. It’s just unbelievable. I keep saying that, but I dont know another way to put it. 😳

Stephen Brady's avatar

Well, reason is a very scarce commodity in tRumplandia.

Jayme Wolworth's avatar

He said that it was an exception for people "trafficked" into bestiality. If that is the case these people more than likely need therapy and not a job at the FBI. And as Foghorn Leghorn stated the exception doesn't state that it's only for those victims.

Eileen's avatar

Sodom and Gomorrah have nothing on our government leaders. Trump/Epstein was/is a nightmare; a tragedy far worse than we know. Kash and his beast babes are too freaky for the ultimate biblical den of iniquity. Epstein be like, “Damn, brother. Way to own that shit. Respect.”

How do we come back from this?

Linda Weide's avatar

Differently then we left it. We come back as a different country. One that no longer accepts that our Constitution is adequate to protect us from this, and that a constitution cannot do it alone. The people have to understand the value of and work on the democracy. Democracy is work, not just easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy!

Carol C's avatar

The animals can be very seductive, I guess. Cows have beautiful eyes and big teats. So the human, let’s assume it’s a man, is perhaps forced to fornicate. So he’s the victim.

Maybe Patel didn’t know what bestiality means.

Linda Weide's avatar

Carol, I recall someone, when I was growing up telling me that they had taught their dog to lick their genitals and it was very rough. I did not have a dog or know that much about it. This was before middle school I think. It is somewhat hazy. I think I heard other things, and I know Sidney Poitier starts his autobiography off with some sort of chicken sex story. I don't know how uncommon it is.

I don't know if Patel knows what bestiality is, but I am assuming he found out something he did was considered that, and after that part of the hiring contract was explained to him, and that is why he removed it. That real adults are having the kind of conversation he is, boggles the mind. 😵‍💫

Claudia Classon's avatar

Susan, I keep saying “weirder and worse every day” but even I was floored by Patel’s BestialityGate. Not that we need an accurate accounting, but, um, how many FBI applicants are molesting animals? Is this a thing? Should we keep our pets inside now????

HI2thDoc's avatar

Mazie Hirono rocks! She's my senator! Brian Schatz is great too!

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Mazie Hirono is a very strong argument again the indiscriminate call for age limits just because we're angry at a few older people hanging on. She's 78, still doing her job, and one of the most progressive members of the Senate. Age is not the problem.

Irna Gadd's avatar

The exchange between Kennedy and Patel is TOTALLY HYSTERICAL -- Patel needs to have his hearing checked, for starters, and then a breathalyzer test. And Hirono deserves a Pulitzer for saying out loud what many newspapers refuse to print: that Patel has been so drunk that meetings had to be rescheduled until he sobered up. UNEFFING BELIEVABLE and yet all too believable.

Jo's avatar

I have no words. I'm so glad you & Heather do, Jeff.

Candace Bartsch's avatar

Ohh goody! Another temper tantrums. We need to start scoring these. He just doesn't quite have the flair that a 2 year old has when they stomp, scream, and throw things all at once. Guess he has to work on that!

Sarah #1's avatar

It’s obvious that the orange imbecile is no longer writing most of these temper tantrum screeds. The vocabulary, spelling, grammar and sentences aren’t actually his because he’s an illiterate-ungrammatical boob. His diaper nurse or others are writing these and only attempting to make it sound like him - then the moron approve the posts before shitting them out.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Somehow, they’ve hired a Trump Translator

devourerofpancakes's avatar

There are none so blind as those who cannot see that Trump has completely lost his mind. None of us look as amazing as we did six years ago, but why can't MAGA compare and Trump now and Trump towards in his first administration. His brain was already bad but not this bad.

Nahla Ake's avatar

I mostly listen to news programs, so whenever an audio clip of His Lordship is played pre-2021 I can *immediately* tell the difference, especially when he was running in 2016. He used to have a larger vocabulary and would speak in complete sentences. No question his mental acuity has radically changed for the worse over the last several years... but no one will say or do anything. I imagine in part because if they do, The Wrath Of MAGA will be aimed towards them and suddenly they & their family will get death threats and their lives will be ruined😞

HI2thDoc's avatar

Isn't it bad enough that the Guardians of Predators party hides and sanctions pedophilia and sexual assault? Now they sanction bestiality. Senator Kennedy has a barnyard interest since he reminds me of Foghorn Leghorn.

Joyce's avatar

What I am really enjoying about Beastie Boy Patel's testimony is that it was so outrageous that even Kennedy dropped the Colonel Cornpone Moron act in sheer disbelief and actually called Beastie Boy out. A small, but beautiful, moment.

Sharon C Storm's avatar

That’s a dangerous question to ask during this regime.

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Marlys Williams's avatar

Jeff, torn section of pic might be of Claudia herself - an image she did not like. Mystery solved!☺️

Lisa Bieber's avatar

I thought so too. Mystery person is wearing a sensible sun hat. Plus it's a great picture of Jeff. I doubt she could bear to throw it away.

Neal Stiffelman's avatar

It’s a good thing all this is non-fiction, because if you tried to write this as a fictional narrative (even Terry Southern wouldn’t dare) you’d be unceremoniously drummed outta the writer’s brigade.

Tess's avatar

Your photo….let me guess…a woman whom your lovely wife was not a fan of????? Possibly!

Great post-trump truly is a self-obsessed crybaby!!

Diana's avatar

Jeff has style too- like Clapton had in that same time period … but you’re probably right about the mystery woman 🤭‼️

Brad Yazell's avatar

If Foghorn Cornpone doesn't understand the beastiality clause perhaps Markwayne can demonstrate for him. I'm sure he's an expert in that field.