indictment season: justice comes for Donald Trump — and Republicans completely lose their shit
predictably, the entire wingnut outrage-industrial complex is melting straight the fuck down
late last week we finally got the news Donald Trump was fucking indicted, and that his arraignment in New York will be tomorrow.
and holy fucking shit, the howling from the Republican screech monkeys, already turned up to eleven from the second that Trump announced his imaginary arrest, went completely off the charts. the entire wingnut outrage-industrial complex melted straight the fuck down into a twenty-megaton shit-fit.
Lindsey Graham totally lost his blubbery shit on Fox News.
and then later tweeted the perfectly not-insane suggestion that Donald Trump act like one of those people — you know exactly who Lindsey is referring to — and do a little rioting on his way to have his pussy grabbed by Lady Justice.
oh Lindsey. those photos locked away in Trump’s safe must really be embarrassing.
meanwhile, Congresswoman Sporkytoes announced that she would be heading to New York to jump in front of the very first camera she could find and stamp her feet and hold her breath until she turned blue because WITCH-HUNT!
and I’m totally looking forward to watching Lady Space Laser — along with the seven or eight bedraggled doofuses dumb enough to tag along with her — being completely ignored by busy New Yorkers who absolutely do not have time for her bullshit.
Gitmo Ron took a little time out of his busy schedule being of a hateful asshole to wedge in a little antisemitism.
spineless cowflop Kevin McCarthy did the same why are they going after Trump when the streets are full of lawless black people running wild dance that Lindsey G. does so well.
and in lockstep, every single one of these performative-nonsense blowhards started screaming PROSECUTING TRUMP WILL GUARANTEE HIS VICTORY IN 2024 in perfect four-part harmony.
but look: these are same dopey dipshits who predicted that impeaching Trump would guarantee his reelection in 2020 and that searching Mar-a-Lago for stolen nuclear secrets would guarantee a giant red wave in 2022, so keep in mind that these people are deeply unserious buffoons and you can safely ignore whatever high-volume caterwauling is being propelled at you now about 2024.
let’s check in on Individual-1 Junior and see how he’s coping.
oh dear.
all the Trump Fan Art Guys were having a perfectly normal one, too.
these guys. these fucking guys. how fucking delusional do you have to be to look at a deteriorating old garbage scow and see Rambo.
finally, let’s see how a real leader acts.
no. fucking. comment. like a fucking boss.
now let’s all go enjoy tomorrow’s arraignment.
folks, a word on a different subject before I let you go: we’re doing some quarterly fundraising at my other venture, The Smirking Chimp. I’m leery of even mentioning it because if you’re one of the people paying to support my own writing here, you’re already doing god’s work and you’re already doing more than enough to help out. but if you’ve got five dollars that you absolutely wouldn’t miss and you do feel like supporting the Chimp, well, that just makes you twice the hero. the donation link is here, or you can go straight to paypal if you need no further convincing. and if you don’t care to donate, that’s totally cool, too, and we will not speak of this again. in fact, we never had this conversation. thanks for listening and that’s it from me for now.
Pretty much a perfect piece here, mate. Well done!
If the MSM spent 99% less time grifting off this despicable monster, and more time debunking his lies and seditious record as POTUS, our country would be healthier and more capable of preventing the harm he and his ilk inflicted upon us. Covering his indictment and subsequent trial is one thing, but covering his continuing, disruptive, circus is craven, complicit, and unmerited.