how about we call it the Strait of Shut the Fuck Up, You Lying Sack of Shit

yeah, I like the sound of that

it’s 11:23 in the morning on Wednesday. President Doughy J. Pantload is in the Oval Bordello, playing patty-cake with his diaper nurse.

suddenly, he perks up. inspiration has struck. ‘Natalie, I have a brilliant idea. it’s a brilliant idea like few thought possible. it just may be the most brilliant idea of all time.’

cackling, he picks up his phone and starts typing.

Now that we have it under U.S.A. control, should we change the name Hormuz Strait to TRUMP STRAIT??? Like America itself, it would be “hotter” than ever before! Thank you for your attention to this matter. President DONALD J. TRUMP

and Diaper Nurse Natty, big, strong, with tears of undying affection welling up in her eyes, goes, ‘sir! sir! how do you do it? how do you come up with the idea to once again rename water? sir!’

holy shit. there it is, folks. the president’s brain has left the station. dumbfuck doesn’t get any more dumbfuckier than this. that’s right, Donny has officially arrived at Peak Dumbfuck.

Donny’s post is the perfect convergence of monumental stupidity, pathological narcissism, supreme delusion, and over-ripe diaper.

‘the Strait is mine now, I’m going to put my name on it.’

fuck off, Donny. fuck straight off into the sea.

make no mistake, the United States does not control the Strait of Hormuz, no matter how many times Donny claims it does, and then thanks us for our attention.

am I right, six-fingered plagiarism robot?

No, the Strait of Hormuz is not under official U.S. control, though U.S. leadership claims operational dominance amid an active military conflict with Iran. [1, 2]

damn straight I’m right.

but me and the robot being right doesn’t stop Preznit Fuckwit or his piss-drunk Secretary of Death from claiming on a daily basis that the war with Iran has been won, Iran’s military has been destroyed, the Strait is now officially Donny’s own little fiefdom, yadda yadda yadda.

that’s the beauty of having entire ‘news’ channels acting as state-run media. Donny and his flunkies get to say anything they want, never receiving the even the slightest bit of gentle pushback.

hell, you don’t even have to be consistent. you can contradict yourself all day long. it doesn’t matter. here’s Exhibit A: Donny’s granny-starving Commerce Secretary, Howard Nutlick — oops, I mean Lutnick. weird how people keep making that mistake.

did you know that Howie was against data centers before he was for them? it’s true — check out these two side-by-side clips.

Lutnick yesterday: “data centers don’t use water. this is propaganda by our adversaries to try to slow us down.”

Lutnick a year ago: “these AI things suck water. they need water.”

Donny and his minions are going to shove data centers down our throats, despite the fact that no voter — Republican or Democrat — wants any part of them.

yeah, well, all you voters can go fuck yourselves. Donny wants as many of these resource-devouring noise-and-pollution factories built as possible, because he and his felonious sons are enriching themselves off them — so he’s sent out his flunkies to go on all the compliant news channels and lie their faces of about how wonderful data centers are, and how only a traitor would object to living next door to one.

Nutlick knows he’s lying. he knows that data centers require an environment-destroying shitload of water — because he went on TV a year ago and said that very thing. but it doesn’t matter what Nutlick or anyone else said a year ago. the yammering bobbleheads on Fox and Newsmax never push back, and never ask followup questions.

they just memory hole that shit — voila, now data centers are goooooood.

reality is whatever Dear Leader says it is on any given day — and George Orwell, wherever he is right now, is screaming, ‘you fuckers. 1984 was supposed to be a cautionary tale, not an instruction manual.’

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now let’s circle back to Donny, because he also took a moment yesterday to gloat about how five corrupt members of the Supreme Court ruled that he is a Very Special Boy Who Can Destroy Any Hallowed Institution He Wants.

We have hundreds of happy construction workers in D.C. busily doing their job building the finest Ballroom/Military complex anywhere in the World. There is nothing like it, and never will be! It was a long, hard, fight in the Court System, but the winner is, as always under “TRUMP,” the U.S.A. Also, it is important to remember, the Ballroom is a 400 Million Dollar gift to America! President DJT

heh-heh-heh, he said long and hard.

oh wait, Donny isn’t finished fucking up shit that doesn’t be belong to him.

get ready for your Outrage of the Day.

The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts removed a major outdoor sculpture from the center’s grounds on Wednesday. The work, installed in 2019, was targeted for elimination after President Trump’s takeover of the center, according to internal documents obtained by The New York Times.

just like when Donny bulldozed the historic East Wing in order to build his fugly Epstein Dance Hall™, there was no advance warning that fuckery was afoot. the first anyone heard about the shitcanning of Blue was when a work crew showed up unannounced, early yesterday morning, and started dismantling it.

why would Donny cart away a precious work of art that was a gift from the artist?

easy answer: he’s a tasteless vulgarian halfwit who doesn’t understand modern art — and he’s offended by that which he doesn’t understand. he sees it, and thinks it’s mocking him. ‘what are those supposed to be, sticks? I hate it.’

I can’t wait to find out what shittastic gold-plated abomination Donny puts up in Blue’s place — because you know that’s exactly what he’s going to do. hey, maybe he’ll erect (heh-heh-heh) a duplicate of the golden statue of himself that now stands at one of his Florida golf motels.

that’s more Donny’s speed.

ugh. who does this? can you imagine being in such constant need of self-affirmation that you put up a gold statue of your own corpulent self? how fucking broken inside to you have to be not to be embarrassed by your own bottomless fragility?

I have a better idea. remember the Donny animatronic that Disney put up in their Hall of Presidents? you remember that one, right? Disney was so sure that the Email Lady was going to win in 2016 that they didn’t even wait for the election, and went ahead and constructed a Hillary animatronic — and then when Donny won, they had to hastily rejigger it, and it ended up looking like some weird, fucked-up nightmare mishmash of both of them. they couldn’t even get Donny’s neckgina right.

let’s put that up on display in our nation’s Capitol. it’s a more fitting tribute to our Usurper-in-Chief, our Grand Defiler of Everything He Touches.

remember, none of this shit is Donny’s personal property. all of this belongs to We the People.

I really, truly hope the Kennedy Center hasn’t destroyed Blue, and instead put it into safe storage somewhere, so that our next president’s Secretary of Un-Fucking All That Shit can put it back where it belongs.

I volunteer to help. who’s with me?

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I think it’s high time for some Daily Claudia, don’t you?

holy shit, look at these two freaks. this is from around 1981 or 1982. I believe we were at the Mohonk Mountain House in New Paltz, NY.

and here we are, decades later, hanging out at Scott and Kathy’s dock on June 14, 2020.

have a great Thursday, everyone.

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here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

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this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.

we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.