he’s trash. she’s trash. it’s a Sunday trash-fest!

all these shitweasels are made for each other

folks, pour one out for MAGA. it’s been a tough week for them.

mommy and daddy are fighting.

Donny Convict and Marjorie Sporkfoot Greene are in the middle of a very messy public divorce right now. what’s caused the rift between these former star-crossed lovers is, of course, the Dead Pedo Bestie Files.

Madge Three-Toes won’t stop calling for the release of the full, unedited files — and her non-stop braying is pissing Donny off, because let’s get real: his name is all over that shit.

seriously — remember those 20,000 Epstein documents that Comer Fudd released last week? the website Courier created a searchable database of all that fuckery, and it turns out that Donny’s name appears 1,628 times — more than anyone else.

that’s a lot of times for a completely innocent bystander to be mentioned by his dead pedo bestie. Joe Biden’s autopen must have been working overtime to gin up that many bogus documents.

look, everyone! Donny made a funny!

“Lightweight Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Brown (Green grass turns Brown when it begins to ROT!), betrayed the entire Republican Party when she turned Left, performed poorly on the pathetic View, and became the RINO that we all know she always was. Just another Fake politician, no different than Rand Paul Jr. (Thomas Massie), who got caught being a full fledged Republican In Name Only (RINO)! MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!!!”

it’s hysterical because green grass turns brown when it rots, get it? get it? what a knee-slapper, am I right?

I love that Donny felt the need to explain the joke. he knows that his own cultists are brain-dead fuckwits who can’t be relied on to understand how grass works.

look, when Donny talks about grass turning brown when it rots, MAGA has to believe him — because as the owner of a string of golf motels, Donny knows more about grass than all the dead ex-wife buriers.

MAGA is hella conflicted right now. who to back? their infallible Dear Leader, or the three-toed freak of nature who wants to expose pedophiles, wherever they may be?

even Donny’s favorite drag queen can’t decide which side to be on.

“I’m at a loss. Something is going on in the air and everyone I like and admire are at odds with one another.”

oh noes!

by the way, here’s my favorite reply under Santos’ not-tweet.

“Charlie Kirk was apparently the only person holding it all together.”

yeah, that’s who it was — the misshapen garden gnome. without him, MAGA is rudderless, apparently.

you’ll be heartened to learn that not all of MAGA is conflicted. some immediately responded in the most MAGA way possible: by issuing death threats.

Marjorie Taylor Greene: “I am now being contacted by private security firms with warnings for my safety as a hot bed of threats against me are being fueled and egged on by the most powerful man in the world… the President of the United States.”

look, death threats suck, and no one should have to endure them — but at the some time, it’s not like Sporky’s own hands aren’t dirty.

After Anthony Fauci appeared at a contentious US House hearing on Monday, the former top public health official who led the nation’s response to Covid-19 singled out the far-right congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene and Fox News as drivers of the “credible death threats” that he described to lawmakers.

here’s a free clue for the MAGAs who can’t decide who to back: the answer is neither. both these shitweasels fucking suck.

Donny, of course, is the demented old narcoleptic fart factory who cares only about having all the money, all the power, and all the attention. he doesn’t give a shit about MAGA, or anyone else.

Marge doesn’t give a shit about MAGA, either. she’s currently on some rehabilitation tour, trying to pretend that she hasn’t spent her entire political career being a complete piece of shit. don’t fall for it.

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Donny’s been lashing out at everyone who’s been calling for the release of the Dead Pedo Bestie files, so it’s only natural he’d go after Thomas Massie.

Massie is, of course, the author of the House bill that would force the release of the files — and because Donny’s such a class act, he went after Massie by taunting him for remarrying after his first wife passed away.

“Did Thomas Massie, sometimes referred to as Rand Paul Jr., because of the fact that he always votes against the Republican Party, get married already??? Boy, that was quick! No wonder the Polls have him at less than an 8% chance of winning the Election. Anyway, have a great life Thomas and (?). His wife will soon find out that she’s stuck with a LOSER!”

because if there’s one thing the guy who cheated on his first wife with his second wife, and cheated on his second wife with with his third wife — and cheated on her with a porn star who he paid off to shut the fuck up about it — has, it’s a deep and abiding reverence for the institution of marriage.

oh, and speaking of Donny’s respect for the sanctity of marriage —

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meanwhile, the worst people in the world are still trying to finesse the idea that it’s not really pedophilia unless it happens in the Pedophile Region of France. otherwise, it’s Sparkling Child Rape.

look who’s added his voice to this Pinhead Chorus. it’s Alan Dershowitz, the tiresome pantload who insists that there’s nothing untoward about getting a massage from a teenage Motel-a-Lago ‘spa girl’ if you keep your underwear on.

is there any issue that Dersh can’t find a way to be on the wrong side of? spoiler alert: no.

“the predecessor on your show described Epstein as a convicted pedophile. he pleaded guilty to one count of having sex for money with a 17-year-and-10-month-old person. that’s not a pedophile.”

you’ll be shocked to learn that Dersh is being completely disingenuous when he spins his bullshit fairy tale about ‘oh, it was just one girl and anyway she was almost 18, no harm no foul.’

let’s listen to Miami Herald investigative reporter Julie K. Brown. it was Brown’s reporting that led to the arrests of Jeffery Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. here she is, to fill in the blanks in Dersh’s fever-swamp narrative.

“Dershowitz, who helped Jeffrey Epstein get this sweetheart deal, knows full well that there were almost three dozen dozen girls, ages 13 to 17, who were named in a list that accompanied this plea deal. The final plea PAPERWORK was manipulated to pick just one victim — and his lawyers made sure they chose the oldest one so that it didn’t look so bad. But the girl who came forward first to police was 14 — and the list of other victims attached to that deal included many young girls.”

huh. someone rich, powerful and well-connected, gaming the legal system to eke out an advantage. whooda thunk it?

look, Epstein is dead. why is Dersh still covering for this degenerate creep? why can’t Dersh just come out and say ‘yeah, this guy was a scumbag, all right.’

oh right, I forgot — it’s because Dersh fucking sucks.

look who else fucking sucks: those god-mad busybodies at The Catholic League.

here’s their unique contribution to the Sparkling Child Rape discourse.

For too long, the media and the chattering class have said that the Catholic Church clergy abuse scandal was due to “pedophile priests.” Wrong. The data clearly show that the vast majority of priestly victims were male (81 percent) and that 78 percent were postpubescent. Why is this important? Because it means the molesters were homosexuals. When males have sex with males who are postpubsecent, that’s called homosexuality, not pedophilia.

ugh.

how nice would it be to one day cover a story where everyone involved doesn’t totally fucking suck? shittiest. timeline. ever.

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you know what? maybe we’ve been looking at this Dead Pedo Bestie business all wrong. maybe it’s not about who hung out with who at some seedy golf motel, or the exact definition of Sparkling Child Rape.

maybe at the heart of all this is just a story about a lost New York.

Jesus Fucking Christ, New York Times. what the fuck are you doing?

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here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

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this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.

we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.

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