everything fucking sucks but at least arrogant dipshit Peter Navarro is going to prison

Lucky Fuck Trump gets another trial delayed

Donald Fucking Trump is the luckiest criminal son of a bitch ever.

he gets caught red-handed with a shitter full of classified war plans and gets his own hand-picked Florida fangirl judge. when Trump files a motion that says the sky is green, she responds that hmm, the sky probably isn’t green but let me take two months to think about it. I’ll get back to you.

he gets caught red-handed trying to overthrow his own government and gets his own hand-picked corrupt Supreme Court willing to seriously explore Trump’s assertion that laws are bullshit and I can crime all I want — and they, too, are in no fucking hurry to rule on it.

he gets caught red-handed doing election fuckery in Georgia and gets a district attorney whose umm, shall we say complicated personal life has already derailed that trial for more than a month.

he gets caught defaming E. Jean Carroll and is hit with an $83.3 million dollar judgement that he can’t afford to pay, and at the last minute some sketchy crony agrees to cover the full amount so that Trump can appeal without having to sell off any shitty golf motels.

somehow, over Donald Trump’s entire pampered life, whenever it looks like this time we’ve got him, after the smoke clears, he’s standing there unscathed — and the rest of us are left to stand around bewildered, going what the fuck just happened?

yesterday, it happened again.

N.Y. district attorney supports a 30-day delay in Donald Trump's hush money trial

Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg said in a court filing Thursday that his office doesn’t oppose Donald Trump’s request to delay his hush money trial — only days before the former president was scheduled to face his first criminal trial while simultaneously running to return to the White House.

what the fuck just happened?

ugh. this is a very long and stupid story but I’m going to try to make it short.

what happened is that over a year ago, Alvin Bragg asked the Southern District of New York for documents — evidence that would support his case against Trump. the SDNY told Bragg to fuck off.

in January, Trump’s lawyers subpoenaed the SDNY, demanding the same documents. the SDNY sat on that subpoena for two months.

then, on Wednesday, twelve days before start of the trial, the SDNY released the documents — all THIRTY ONE THOUSAND PAGES of them.

so now, both Bragg’s team and Trump’s team have to wade through tens of thousands of pages of evidence — it’s going to take weeks, and so the trial has to be put on hold.

Trump has asked for a 90-day delay. Bragg has countered with 30 days. either way, that’s one more Trump trial now in limbo. the trial that was scheduled to start in ten days won’t be happening until April or June — at the earliest. heads, Trump wins. tails, the American people lose.

and there are so many fucking questions. why did the SDNY tell Bragg to fuck off? who’s decision was it? why did the SDNY wait until the last minute to comply with Trump’s subpoena?

and, most infuritatingly, if the Southern District of New York had TENS OF THOUSAND OF PAGES OF EVIDENCE INCRIMINATING TRUMP, why the fuck didn’t they bring their own federal charges against Trump a long time ago, instead of sitting on their asses and forcing Bragg to do it in Manhattan?

for an answer, let’s turn to lawyer Joyce Vance, who posted a long analysis last night:

We don’t really know what’s going on yet.

it’s maddening. even the experts are standing around going what the fuck just happened?

Joyce Vance speaks for all of us when she points out that—

Trump gets all the breaks. It’s frustrating.

fuck it. maybe I’ll turn this substack into a Kate Middleton fan page. it’ll be easier on the blood pressure.

you haters leave Kate alone!

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but at least there’s one bright ray of light: arrogant Trumpist dipshit Peter Navarro is going to prison.

A federal appeals court on Thursday denied ex-Donald Trump adviser Peter Navarro’s bid to avoid reporting to a federal prison next week to begin serving a four-month sentence for his contempt of Congress conviction.

The unanimous decision from the DC Circuit Court of Appeals means Navarro will have to report to a federal prison in Miami by March 19.

good. this couldn’t be happening to a more deserving fuckface.

Peter Navarro is another one of these entitled assholes who tried to get away with his own version of laws are bullshit and I can crime all I want — except, sorry Peter, no. that argument only works for Donald Trump.

Navarro did this to himself. he didn’t have to be facing prison time right now. instead of blowing off a congressional subpoena, he could have shown up, sat down and fifth amendmented his face off, and then gone home and enjoyed the rest of his life.

but no — Navarro is one of these insufferable pricks who imagines that he’s always the smartest guy in the room, and he thought he could finesse his way out of deep shit.

and now, Peter Navarro probably won’t even be the smartest guy in his prison cell.

let’s enjoy this clip from last August, with our friend Anarchy Princess getting the best of Navarro.

“bro, you’re already facing charges, go ahead and commit another crime. I’ve been here the whole time. have some situational awareness.”

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hey leftist: Alex Jones wants to eat your ass.

yes, Alex Jones really did post this to his own twitter feed.

I have no comment, other than to say it’s great that Alex is open to broadening his sexual horizons.

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BREAKING as I’m writing this:

Live Updates: Judge Says Fani Willis Can Stay on Trump Case If Ex-Boyfriend Withdraws

The Atlanta district attorney’s romantic relationship with the lead prosecutor she hired to oversee the case created an “appearance of impropriety,” the judge said, ruling that the prosecution can’t proceed unless he leaves or she steps aside.

so, the trial is back on — but probably with a delay, as the prosecutor who replaces ex-boyfriend Wade will need to be brought up to speed.

justice delayed is justice denied.