elderly golfer holds another sad rally in a tiny little venue

the crowds may be small — but the hate-mongering is still turned up to 11

Little Donny Convict could very likely be the most broken-inside person ever to waddle the face of the Earth.

he requires constant affirmation that he’s a Very Special Boy, and he reacts to every slight with the emotional maturity of a three-year-old at the beach whose ice cream cone just fell onto the sand.

that’s why he’s so fucking easy to wind up.

things were going swimmingly for Donny at the debate. he hadn’t shat himself. he hadn’t said anything stupid. and then Kamala hit him with this:

“I'm going to invite you to attend one of Donald Trump's rallies because it's a really interesting thing to watch. You will see during the course of his rallies he talks about fictional characters like Hannibal Lecter. He will talk about windmills cause cancer. And what you will also notice is that people start leaving his rallies early out of exhaustion and boredom.”

and from that point on, it was game fucking over for Donny. he completely lost his shit, and, in that thick Queens NY accent of his, out of his rancid anus-mouth rocketed THEY’RE EATING THE DAWGS.

but here’s why Kamala’s taunt really stung Donny: she wasn’t wrong. every word of what she said is true — and Donny knows it.

as Barack Obama pointed out, Donny’s … uh, crowds … are tiny.

Donny held a hate-rally yesterday at the Linda Ronstadt Music Hall in Tucson, Arizona. there are two things you need to know about this.

first, Linda Ronstadt — a Tucson native — was justifiably fucking horrified by the fact that a rapist was sullying the elegant venue that bears her name.

the second thing you need to know is that the Music Hall is a shoebox-sized venue. it seats about 2,300 people.

oh wait, there’s a third thing, too: while Captain Crowdsize was braying at his dwindling flock of MAGA cultists in Arizona, Kamala was holding TWO rallies in North Carolina.

the first one was at the Bojangles Coliseum in Charlotte. the coliseum has 8,600 seats — and she had a capacity crowd.

the second was at the Greensboro Coliseum — capacity 22,000 — and again, she had the place rockin’.

chew on that, Donny. Kamala drew over thirty thousand enthusiastic Democrats while you were doing your worn-out dog-and-pony show to … well, let’s get Obama back here for some visual aids.

Sundowing Grandpa Racistpants is still spreading his message of hatred.

“in addition to Aurora, Colorado, there’s a place called Springfield, Ohio that you’ve been reading about. twenty thousand illegal Haitian immigrants have descended upon the town of fifty-eight thousand people, destroying their entire way of life. this was a beautiful community. now it’s uh horrible what’s happened. enrollment in the state’s Medicaid and food assistance programs has soared, motor vehicle accidents have skyrocketed. recording of 911 calls even show residents are reporting that they’re walking off with the town’s geese. they’re taking the geese. you know where the geese are? in the park. and even walking off with their pets.”

thank you, Nobel Prize-winning ornithologist Donald John Trump, for explaining where geese can be found.

it doesn’t matter to Donny that all of this shit had been debunked. there are no 911 calls. there are no reports of missing pets. it doesn’t matter to Donny that he’s already humiliated himself in front of the entire world by pushing this fever-swamp fairy tale. he’s going to keep on doing it, and — oh look, here’s Donny taking the racism dial and twisting it so far past 11 that the fucking thing breaks off in his hand.

“illegal Haitian migrants taking over a beautiful place, it was so beautiful. Springfield Ohio, I was there, I campaigned there a while ago. Springfield, it was so beautiful. now it’s just— what a place. can you imagine you have this small little community, all of a sudden you have twenty thousand illegals in your community, nobody knows where they come from. I’m angry about young American girls being raped and sodomized and murdered by savage criminal aliens.”

again, none of this is happening in Springfield.

a few days ago, I asked “are these evil fuckwads trying to get someone killed?”

it’s not a question any more. the hate-mongering is so fucking overt, I don’t believe Donny will be satisfied until he has blood spattered all over his freakishly undersized hands.

just look at what Donny — and his partner in fuckery, Couchfuck McGee, and the entire wingnut outrage-industrial complex — hath wrought.

“We’re all victims this morning,” said the woman, who moved to Springfield six years ago. “They’re attacking us in every way.”

Aside from the anxiety caused by Tuesday night’s debate, the woman also said her cars have been vandalized twice in the middle of the night. She woke up one morning to broken windows and another to acid thrown on the vehicle. She has added cameras to her driveway and tried to report the incidents to the police to no avail.

“I’m going to have to move because this area is no longer good for me,” she said. “I can’t even leave my house to go to Walmart. I’m anxious and scared.”

excellent work, MAGA — take a victory lap.

legal, tax-paying, gainfully employed Haitian migrants are now cowering in fear and afraid to leave their houses — all based on a vicious lie that some fuckhead on Facebook spread.

and now the hatred is spreading beyond Springfield’s Haitian community.

Several city, county and school buildings around Springfield were closed Thursday because of a bomb threat “to multiple facilities throughout Springfield,” according to a city statement released Thursday morning. Springfield City Hall was evacuated around 8:30 a.m.

Springfield Police Chief Allison Elliott said at a Thursday afternoon press conference that City Hall, the Bureau of Motor Vehicles, the Springfield Driver’s Exam Station, Ohio License Bureau on the south side, Springfield Academy of Excellence and Fulton Elementary School were all named in the threat and were cleared using explosive-detecting canines.

just great. these MAGA shit-sticks are now going after Springfield’s government, all because Springfield’s mayor had the temerity to debunk all of Donny and Couchfuck’s lies.

excellent work, you deranged cultists. in just twenty-four hours, you’ve done more damage to Springfield than all their Haitian residents have done in the six years they’ve lived there.

---

all of this is right out of the authoritarian’s playbook. keep the rabble riled up over nothing — keep their hatred focused on somewhere else — and they’ll never notice that plutocrats are picking their pockets.

and when they finally realize that Project 2025 has taken away their clean air and water, and their birth control, and their porn, and their safe, regulated pharmaceuticals, and their schools, and on and on — it will be far too late to do anything about it.

and it will be nobody’s fault but their own.

our assignment is clear: defeat MAGA at the polls in November, keep Donny’s tiny hands far from the levers of power — and make sure Project 2025 is consigned to the shitcan of failed fuckery forever.

it’s up to us. we can do it. we have to do it.