elderly fascist demands to know why ‘his’ generals can’t be Nazis

pro tip: Hitler did not, in fact, have any good ideas

Little Donny Fuckface is a putrefying trash bag of pathologies and personality defects. any single one of them should be enough to disqualify him from holding any office in the land, much less the presidency.

his blatant racism. his toxic misogyny. his megalomania. his childishness. his greed. his fascist tendencies.

his history of sexual assault, and his criminal convictions. his theft of our nation’s most closely-guarded state secrets.

his ignorance. his blithering stupidity. his advanced dementia, and the fact that he can no longer string three coherent words together.

but above all, Donny Convict’s most-disqualifying aspect should be his jaw-dropping insistence that “Hitler did a lot of good things.”

John Kelly: “he would uh, he commented more than once that, you know, ‘that Hitler did some good things, too.’ and of course, if you know history, again I think he’s lacking in that, but if you know history, you know what Hitler was all about, you’d be pretty hard to make an argument that he did anything good.”

reporter: “so what would you say, what would you say when he said to you that Hitler did a lot of good things?”

Kelly: “well I would tell him that, you know sir, if you — first of all, you should never say that. but if you knew what Hitler was all about from the beginning to the end, everything he did was in support of his racist, fascist life, you know, philosophy, so that nothing he did, you could argue, was good. it was certainly not done for the right reasons. but he would say occasionally that.”

imagine having to be told — more than once — not to praise Hitler.

I have a question. John Kelly was Chief of Staff. it was his job to manage Donny’s time, set his schedule, coordinate with other departments, that sort of thing. so, given that context, how the fuck does Hitler did some good things come up in conversation?

“sir, you have a meeting with the Secretary of Agriculture at 2pm today. let’s go over this briefing paper.”
”that reminds me, John, that Hitler did some good things.”

and then there’s this.

pro tip: nobody needs the kind of generals that Hitler had — unless you’re interested in being on the losing side of a fucking world war.

Donny, of course, is more concerned with loyalty than with military expertise. he wants generals who won’t tell him no. when Donny says let’s kill the terrorists’ families, he doesn’t want any namby-pamby woke general whining to him about the Geneva Conventions. he wants it fucking done.

megalomaniac Donny can’t get it through his thick skull that the US armed forces swear an oath to their country, not to him.

oh, and by the way — Hitler’s generals tried to murder the shit out him — more than once.

One of the earliest came in 1938, before World War II even began. A handful of generals led by Hans Oster conspired with government ministers and diplomats to overthrow Hitler, and kill him if necessary, believing he was about to thrust Germany into a massive war it could not win.

spoiler alert: Hitler did, in fact, thrust Germany into a massive war it could not win.

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while Donny is doing his Shitty Hitler act, the press is ramping up its useless clownfuckery. here’s an actual headline from Politico.

“Column: The clock is ticking on Kamala Harris. The VP still needs to reassure voters she’s not too liberal, writes our politics bureau chief Jonathan Martin.”

are you fucking drunk, Politico? how liberal is “not too liberal”? is there some ungodly big liberalometer somewhere where we can scientifically measure this out?

please step on the scales, Kamala. uh oh, you’re just a little over the line. looks like you’re going to have to cut back on all the woke.

why aren’t any of the worthless scribblers of the corporate-controlled media asking Agolf Shitler to prove he’s not “too much” of a fascist?

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it turns out that Donny knows more about funerals than all the funeral directors. oh, and he’s also racist as fuck.

here’s another horror story from Donny’s presidency.

in April 2020, Vanessa Guillén, a 20-year-old Army private, was bludgeoned to death by a fellow soldier at Fort Hood, in Texas. The killer, aided by his girlfriend, burned Guillén’s body. Guillén’s remains were discovered two months later, buried in a riverbank near the base, after a massive search.

the story got a lot of attention in the press — so naturally, Donny figured he’d horn in on it, and make it all about himself. he invited Guillén’s grieving family to the White House, and offered to pay for their funeral expenses.

nice of Donny to do the right thing for a change, right? wrong. fast forward to a couple month later, when Donny asked if the family had ever sent a bill.

According to attendees, and to contemporaneous notes of the meeting taken by a participant, an aide answered: Yes, we received a bill; the funeral cost $60,000.

Donny threw a shit-fit.

Trump became angry. “It doesn’t cost 60,000 bucks to bury a fucking Mexican!” He turned to his chief of staff, Mark Meadows, and issued an order: “Don’t pay it!” Later that day, he was still agitated. “Can you believe it?” he said, according to a witness. “Fucking people, trying to rip me off.”

charming.

is there some mortician’s handbook somewhere that explains how much the funerals of various nationalities should be? racist asshole Donny probably figures that oh, it’s a Mexican, just slip the gravediggers a bottle of tequila.

oh, and fun fact: Vanessa Guillén was born in Houston. she’s as American as the coward who, when called upon to serve his country, begged his daddy to pay a quack doctor to gin up a bullshit note about imaginary bone spurs.

nobody should be looking to Donny for advice on what a funeral should cost. how fucking much do you think he paid to have Ivana buried at his New Jersey golf motel?

if it was more then ten bucks, he got ripped off.

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Deteriorating Donny fell asleep at another campaign event yesterday.

and then later in the day, the narcoleptic fart factory canceled yet another public appearance.

Adding to the growing list of scheduled appearances he has canceled at the last minute, Donald Trump flaked Tuesday on an “interactive town hall” titled “Make America Healthy Again.”

The event, which had been rescheduled once already, was billed as an “expert-driven discussion” featuring Trump, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Tulsi Gabbard, among others.

for fuck’s sake, it wasn’t even an in-person event. it was to be “interactive.” how exhausted is poor widdle Donny that he can’t sit front of a laptop and open the Zoom app?

hey, Politico, have I got story idea for you. maybe assign some reporter to ask if Donny can reassure voters that he isn’t too decrepit — that is, if you can get Donny to stay awake while you question him.

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wait, here’s one more story to get your blood boiling.

A proposed personnel roster circulating within Donald Trump's campaign and transition operation lists Aileen Cannon, the federal judge who threw out Trump's classified documents case, as a possible candidate for attorney general, multiple sources familiar with the matter have told ABC News.

wait, what? let’s go over the timeline here. Judge Fangirl down in Florida rules that Donny’s Big Stolen Classified Document Fuckery Trial — crimes which Donny’s confessed to, numerous times — should go bye-bye, because reasons, and then out of the clear blue, her name shows up on the shortlist for Attorney General?

does that sound like a reward to you? maybe even a little quid-pro-quo?

if a Democrat did this, Congressional Republicans would already be falling all the fuck over each other in a mad dash to be the first to hold hearings. Comer Fudd and Shirt Sleeve Jimmy would be having a slap-fight other over which of them got the best camera angles.

has anyone even seen Merrick Garland lately? do we need to be putting his picture on the side of milk cartons?

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finally, let’s give the last word to Uncle Tim, because he’s so fucking good at this.

“but look, I’m not gonna waste time. I’m gonna talk about his running mate. his running mate, Elon Musk. seriously, where is Senator Vance? after he got asked the simplest question in the world at the debate, ‘did Donald Trump lose the 2020 election?’ and after two weeks he finally said ‘no, he didn’t.’ that’s where he’s been spending his time. look, Elon’s on that stage, jumpin’ around, skippin’ like a dipshit.”

“skippin’ like a dipshit.”

the simplicity, the internal rhyme — it’s fucking poetry, that’s what it is.

13 days. if we vote, we win.