Donny Dumbfuck’s gonna learn about tariffs the hard way

everyone with a brain can see what’s coming

deranged dictators sure love to inflict their fucked-up ideas about economics on the rest of us.

Uncle Joe Stalin’s forced collectivization of farms led to massive famine — millions starved to death in Ukraine alone. (why the hell is it always Ukraine?)

then there was Mao’s economic clusterfuck known as the Great Leap Forward. historians aren’t exactly sure how many people died from it, but it’s generally thought to be somewhere between 15 to 55 million.

Donny Convict will probably never put up numbers like that — but that isn’t going to stop him from trying like hell.

yesterday, Donny announced his Great Leap Feet-First Into The Fucking Shitter.

President Donald Trump said tariffs on goods from Mexico and Canada would go into effect Tuesday, ending a month-long delay that saw both U.S. neighbors scramble unsuccessfully to head off the punishing trade action and sending stock prices into a swift decline.

and yes, indeed — the markets freaked right out after the announcement. the Dow dropped off a cliff.

the Dow was down over 600 points yesterday, and as I’m writing this, it’s down another 600+ points this morning.

feast your ears on some prime gibberish from Dear Leader.

“I’m a huge fan of Ronald Reagan but he was bad on trade. very bad on trade. he allowed a lot of people — a lot of business to be taken. so I say that with due respect because I — he was so great on other things, but he was bad on trade. we are setting records right now. records like nobody has ever seen before. when you have companies like this coming in and almost forty percent of their company in one signature is going to be devoted to what he does which is one of the most important businesses in the world. that’s an unbelievable thing.”

who the fuck can even decipher this cornucopia of batshittery? it’s the raving of a madman in steep cognitive decline — but none of that gibberish matters. the fun part is watching the Dow drop in real-time as Donny drones on.

keep talking, Donny. maybe you can drop the Dow all the way down to nobody’s ever seen before.

and — oh, look! we’re in a trade war now.

HONG KONG — China and Canada moved swiftly on Tuesday to retaliate against newly imposed U.S. tariffs, announcing their own levies on U.S. goods that could further disrupt the United States’ trade with its top three trading partners.

everyone with a brain saw this coming. unfortunately, ‘everyone with a brain’ is a demographic that does not include our current president — or his party. the dumbfuck still doesn’t understand that tariffs are a tax paid by the importer and passed onto you and me, the consumers — and there’s no way to explain it to him. he simply doesn’t want to know. here’s a jaw-dropping exchange from February 27th.

reporter: “tariffs are paid eventually by American importers and consumers.”

Donny: “no, I think they are paid for by the country.”

fuck off with your facts, mister big-shot reporter. Donny — the lifelong business failure who never does the reading, and went broke running casinos — doesn’t think so.

then we get this:

reporter: “tariffs don’t hurt other countries — they’re paid by American businesses and consumers.”

reporter: “no, no. China pays. other countries pay. it’s a beautiful thing.”

reporter: “then why did farmers need billions in bailout money when tariffs crushed exports?”

Donny: “we took care of farmers! they love me. the best farmers.”

“farmers love me.” it’s like talking to a fucking child.

that reporter is correct. farmers needed massive bailouts to the tune of 28 billion dollars after Donny’s first dance with tariffs.

The Trump administration gave more taxpayer dollars to farmers harmed by the administration’s trade policies than the federal government spends each year building ships for the Navy or maintaining America’s nuclear arsenal, according to a new report. A National Foundation for American Policy analysis concluded the spending on farmers was also higher than the annual budgets of several government agencies. “The amount of money raises questions about the strategy of imposing tariffs and permitting the use of taxpayer money to shield policymakers from the consequences of their actions,” according to the analysis.

well, get ready to do this dance all over again — because here’s where Donny’s Great Leap Feet-First Into The Fucking Shitter really kicks into overdrive.

“To the Great Farmers of the United States: Get ready to start making a lot of agricultural product to be sold INSIDE of the United States. Tariffs will go on external product on April 2nd. Have fun!”

hello Great Farmers! you have one month in which to completely change your business model. figure it the fuck out, and have fun!

what a psychopath.

here are some facts: in 2022, US farmers exported $179 billion worth of food to other countries — and there’s no figuring it the fuck out on turning around and selling those goods right here in America, because farms are already producing more food than Americans can consume.

The U.S. agricultural system is able to feed 136% of the country’s population.

there’s no market for that surplus food except overseas. have fun figuring out what do with all that produce you can’t sell, farmers!

Donny’s going to have to do multi-billion-dollars bailouts all over again — bailouts that we, the taxpayers, will have to eat.

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when Mao did his Great Leap Forward, the Chinese Communist Party had to create their own propaganda to hype it.

but Donny doesn’t have to bother with any of that for his Great Leap Feet-First Into The Fucking Shitter — he’s got his brainwashed cultists doing it for him.

this is from a comment under Donny’s “have fun, famers!” Truth Social post.

pro tip: hoovering rails of Adderall, watching yourself on TV and illiterate rage-posting does not qualify as “work.”

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now let’s talk about another shit-for-brains — Tommy Tuberville, Amercan’s dumbest Senator. Terminally-Concussed Tommy will forever be a cautionary tale for why you should never play football without a helmet.

someone stuck a microphone in front of Tommy’s face yesterday — and if they were expecting to get an earful of stupidity, Tommy did not disappoint.

“Zelensky’s gonna play hardball, but you know what? he’s not even in the game. it’s gonna be Putin and President Trump and the people on our side that will end up making this decision for the future of Ukraine.”

excuse me, what? Donny and Vladdy are going to divvy up Ukraine all on their lonesomes, and Zelensky and the people of Ukraine can just go fuck themselves? is that how we’re doing diplomacy now?

hey — let’s change some of the names and see how it sounds.

“Mościcki’s gonna play hardball, but you know what? he’s not even in the game. it’s gonna be Hitler and President Roosevelt and the people on our side that will end up making this decision for the future of Poland.”

yeah, that checks out.

in this next clip, get ready for the most it never happened thing ever.

“we’re getting to a point now where women and girls sports are getting ready to be extinct. because already in states across this country, we have high school teams that are made up of totally boys participating against girls.”

Tommy, shut — and I cannot put too fine a point on this — the fuck up. this isn’t happening anywhere, where an entire high school team is trans. and there isn’t one reporter in the country willing to demand proof of this vile hallucination. how hard would that be? “Senator Tuberville, can you identify one school with an all-trans team?” nope, they just let him prattle on, and never challenge the lie.

I hate to keep interjecting with facts, but —

Gillian Branstetter, a spokesperson for the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), who told Newsweek that Save Women’s Sports, a leading voice in the bid to ban transgender athletes from competing in girls’ sports, identified only five transgender athletes competing on girls’ teams in school sports for grades K through 12.

five. wrap your mind around that. five — in all of America’s schools. that’s what these hateful bastards are up in arms over. five trans althetes.

go away, Tommy. don’t you have any military promotions to hold up?

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here’s your headline of the day.

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here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

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this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.