438 Comments
User's avatar
Susan Niemann's avatar

Whatta way to start the week!

"Jesus H. Christ on a catamaran "

"oh yeah, the boss is fuckin’ nuts. he’s out there where the buses don’t run."

"Commander Crazypants"

Ahhhhh... this is the content I live for. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

“Out there where the buses don’t run” and “Jesus Christ on a catamaran” are my two new favorite phrases.

Expand full comment
Carrie Duncan's avatar

I do not know how anyone writing DAILY consistently comes up with spit-takes as original as these (the two above, plus "industrial-strength fucknuttery" were my favorites), but there oughtta be a medal. Or a parade.

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

Jeff is just really good at spitting. Maybe, he has sialorrhea. If so, he's not wasting a drop. And right on target!

Expand full comment
Harlemscorp's avatar

So many tidbits to embroider on a wallhanging....

Expand full comment
Harlemscorp's avatar

What is" sialorrhea"...new 1 one me...WOW

My stomach actually hurts from ROTFLMAO😄😄😄😄😄😄😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Rebecca Elliott's avatar

Sialorrhea, excessive, uncontrollable production of saliva, sort of like the spit version of "diarrhea." NOT to be confused with "verborrhea," which is the shit that comes out every time he speaks.

Expand full comment
Harlemscorp's avatar

Ohhh, did you see that thick white thing that flew outta his mouth during his presser at Margo Logitech?YOUTUBE has it & toucan see itclearly😏😬🤢🤮

Expand full comment
Harlemscorp's avatar

Gotcha...🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

Expand full comment
Linda McCaughey's avatar

Actually, "Out where the buses don't run" is an oldie--but still a goodie. It was an oldie even when George Carlin used it in one of his routines.

Expand full comment
Liz and Max the No. 1 Cat's avatar

There is an episode of "Miami Vice" titled "Out Where the Buses Don't Run" in which the character who is out where the buses don't run looks at Crockett's pet alligator and deadpans: "Nice dog". Don't ask me why I still remember that. Can't remember what I had for lunch yesterday, but I can quote random lines from 80s television series.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

If I were you I would only worry if you start referencing Hannibal Lecter over and over for no discernible reason

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

I'm walking to the kitchen..to forget what I went in there for...😂😂

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

Oh christ- I do that all the time, then I have to leave the room & go back to where I started to remember why I was going there. 🤣

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

I read an explanation of this, relating it to video compression: a video file does not contain each frame, but just the changes from one frame to the next, until every so often there is a scene change that requires a reset, loading a whole new frame. Well, your brain does this too, and every time you step through a doorway there is a reset and you lose the continuity.

Expand full comment
Patricia Gomes's avatar

You just gave me hope ! When I forget a fact, my excuse is that there are so many cubbies in my brain ( age related) that it takes a while to find them. Usually do. Takes its own time ! 🤣

Expand full comment
Lynn Van Haren's avatar

That’s hysterical! There are 2 guys at my pool who can also randomly quote from 80’s movies & TV series

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

I lived with my brother and his wife briefly,me,at breakfast one day; 'Are y'all singing 70s love ballads til the wee hours??'

Yep..we do that.

Expand full comment
Linda Fairchild's avatar

You are awesome!!!

Expand full comment
meryl selig's avatar

Timeless series. The pet alligator was key

Expand full comment
Bob Bowden's avatar

Don’t forget the middle initial H. (for Horatio)

Expand full comment
Dean Sigler's avatar

If you read Lamb, by Cristopher Moore, you learn the "H" is for "Hallowed," as in "Hallowed be Thy name."

Expand full comment
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

Lamb, what a great book

Expand full comment
Dean Sigler's avatar

Your daily dispersion of common sense and anti-BS helps me and a friend I share it with get through each day. Thank you, and I'm gratified that you like Lamb. I put it in my church's library.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Lamb is the funniest book I've ever read

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

Perfect. I always wondered what the H stood for. 😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

Technically it is from the initials JHS for "Jesus Hominem Soter" which is Latin for "Jesus Savior of Mankind" sometimes written IHC because there is a Greek version (but I don't know the Greek words) with the sigma written like a C (as in Cyrillic) because that was a Byzantine habit, and somebody misinterpreted it as "Jesus H. Christ" and it became a saying.

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

WOW! I had no idea! 👍👍👍

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

I thought it was Harold, you know, like in "Hark, Harold Angel sings..."

Expand full comment
Marla's avatar

I always thought it stood for Hershey Bar.

Expand full comment
SPW's avatar

Jesus H Christ on a Hershey Bar?

Expand full comment
Bob Bowden's avatar

Jesus H. Christ eating a Hershey Bar!

Expand full comment
Bob Bowden's avatar

Or Jesus H. Christ on the Hershey Park Rollercoaster! https://www.pinterest.com/pin/611082243167611285/

Expand full comment
David (Dave) Jaspers's avatar

I thought it was Harold.

Expand full comment
Mary Hall's avatar

I thought it was Hussein.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Jesus Hussein Christ does have a certain ring to it, no?

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

Hussein is Arabic, not Aramaic or Hebrew.

Expand full comment
Nevertheless, She Persisted's avatar

That's why it's a funny suggestion.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Silence from the entire GOP.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

All they did was hit Joe Biden about age and now that there's only one old guy in the race, crickets from the right about Don-old's age

Expand full comment
Veronica Speedwell's avatar

Crickets from the mass media. :(

Expand full comment
Lynn Van Haren's avatar

Right? It’s infuriating that the scribblers of the press give him no pushback at all

Expand full comment
Sam's avatar

Maybe so they don’t push him out and then they will lose? Wishful thinking? 🤔

Expand full comment
Lynn Horsky's avatar

the lambs at slaughter for only their livers by Hannibal Lecter

Expand full comment
Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

I like them better that way, Bruce. SILENT. Because when they are quiet they are not lying.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Huzzah!! 🙌

Expand full comment
Eileen's avatar

The buses line just killed me. Trump's whacked - which is exactly what the mafia would do at this point if he were their responsibility: "Let's go ice fishing. You'll love it." Or "Boss, the Everglades are teeming with the best locations for Trump casinos. They'll be EVEN BIGGER than before! Just a short cruise from the coast."

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

Dick Cheney is inviting him on a hunting trip

Expand full comment
Dianne Moore's avatar

Or to the train station.

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

Rut Roh!!😈😈☠️☠️

Expand full comment
Janine Johnston's avatar

😂😂😂

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment
David (Dave) Jaspers's avatar

Almost sprayed coffee on my monitor - several times.

Expand full comment
Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I accidently stuck a spoon in my nose eating oatmeal.

Expand full comment
William Burke's avatar

No worries Chris. The CDC has noted an uptick in medical reports and this is now referred to in the medical community as the Tiedrich Effect. The AMA is recommending that no food or beverage be consumed while reading Tiedrich.

Expand full comment
David (Dave) Jaspers's avatar

Kinda like a Surgeon General's warning.

Expand full comment
Diana Hembree's avatar

Hahaaaa!

Expand full comment
David (Dave) Jaspers's avatar

That would leave a mark. 😂 😂 😂 😂

Expand full comment
Teri's avatar

Shoot this right into my veins every daytill KamalaWalz are inaugurated! Brilliant, Jeff! 🏆

Expand full comment
Barbara Morgan's avatar

😂 me too

Expand full comment
David Skoglund's avatar

Also; crazier than a shithouse rat”!

Expand full comment
Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Everyone on this thread shares that sentiment Susan! Jeff’s genius should be read by everyone!

Expand full comment
Harlemscorp's avatar

" a fried brain resides in both of their skulls"; those apples never rolled.....👋🙄😏😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

LOL

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

Crazier than a rat in a cesspool!🐀💩

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Or a rat in a tin golf motel

Expand full comment
Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

“Law and order: Donald Trump is always the victim unit” got me! I had to restack that one!

Expand full comment
Deb Martina's avatar

Me too 🤣

Expand full comment
SPW's avatar

Everything you’ve said 👍👍.

Expand full comment
Anne E Sweeney's avatar

ALL of the above.....ALL of them

Expand full comment
Alison Parker's avatar

Honestly getting afraid of just how badly he's going to further deteriorate by the election. Not for his own sake, but for the sake of the people he's aiming his ire at.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

His election deniers are in place... hopefully Marc Elias will dispatch them with extreme prejudice.

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

I'm contributing to Marc Elias too.

His Democracy Docket is doing more than any other organization to prepare legal resources to protect the 2024 election. Thanks to all of Jeff subscribers who have become contributors!!!

https://www.democracydocket.com/support/

Expand full comment
Eileen's avatar

Done. Monthly donation created and money well spent. Marc Elias is the real deal.

Expand full comment
Schnauzermom's avatar

Thanks for telling us about this website. Truly scary shit going on in obedience to Shitler’s decree that somebody needs to find him some damn votes.

Expand full comment
Steve in SoCal's avatar

A Democracy Docket membership is only $10/mo, and you get access to exclusive content.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

'Democracy Docket' is free,'Democracy Watch' is the premium content.

Expand full comment
Steve in SoCal's avatar

"Become a Democracy Docket Member"

https://www.democracydocket.com/member/

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

I signed up for the annual membership. Definitely want to support this work, it’s critical.

Expand full comment
Patricia Gomes's avatar

Just looked. $10 / month for Docket.

Expand full comment
Maui Wahine's avatar

Marc Elias needs to win a Congressional Medal of Honor at some point for all that he has done to save our democracy. Iʻm a monthly supporter.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Same here!! Him and his team are warriors!!

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

And Brian Tyler Cohen and Marc have reached 100 million views on YouTube, they're turning on the lights,to make the roaches flee.

Expand full comment
Mps's avatar

Done

Expand full comment
Marty's avatar

Marc Elias, our acting AG.

Expand full comment
Steve in SoCal's avatar

Merrick Garland is too busy rearranging his sock drawer to do much else.

Expand full comment
Walt Svirsky's avatar

Let him aim his ire at the other convicts in his cell block.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Don't drop the soap Donnie,Steve Bannon might be behind you.

Expand full comment
Marcie's avatar

Maybe they will get Jim Jordan by then. 😎

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂

Expand full comment
Steve in SoCal's avatar

That'd make one disgusting daisy chain

Expand full comment
Richard Spiering's avatar

Bannon wouldn't be within 100 feet of a shower...

Expand full comment
Rick Calegari's avatar

Or a bar of soap.

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

"sloppy steve"🤣

Expand full comment
Rick Calegari's avatar

Rotting more daily and pretty soon, there won't be anything left to rot. Amazing how Delirious Diaperload the I talks about this election interference bullshit while his MAGA cronies plot daily to destroy this November's results. And the first time around in Georgia still hasn't gone to trial. Sometimes you have to pinch yourself to see, like his assholiness, if this is one big fucking nightmare that just won't go away.

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

And now the whack-a-doodle has decided he’s gonna sue the Federal Government for millions because of their search of Marg-A-Lardo.

Good grief, it just never ends.

Expand full comment
Rick Calegari's avatar

And interesting enough, it's a branch of the Federal Government that he wants to get rid of.

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

that will get laughed out of court

Expand full comment
John McGrath's avatar

Maybe even the Supreme Court!

Expand full comment
Maui Wahine's avatar

I wonder who those "low self esteem leakers" are. Theyʻd better watch their backs.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Dum Dum and McSniffles.

Expand full comment
Marty's avatar

You mean us?

Expand full comment
Doc Blase''s avatar

Everyone within range. Apparently Emperor Carrotus' rage has unlimited scope; from cabinet members to staff to Secret Service to everyone else.

That does include us out there where the busses don't run.

Expand full comment
Lynn O’Neal's avatar

How can anyone read TFG and not conclude it was written by a 3rd grader? Or perhaps that’s the problem? As an educator I am appalled at this because it appears this is the level of appropriate communication for MAGA masses.

Expand full comment
Anita Smibert's avatar

I saw a disgusting meme on Facebook yesterday and I asked when Trump and his cult were going to stop resorting to middle school attacks and told him that their immature bullying wasn't working. He called me a bitch. I reported him for both posts. 🤣

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Yeah. And he went to Wharton.

Expand full comment
Mary Hall's avatar

"Donald J. Trump was the dumbest goddamn student I ever had." -- Former Prof. Wm T. Kelly, University of PA, Wharton

Expand full comment
Patricia Gomes's avatar

Damn. I pray that someone smuggles out his fucking class standing. 1.02 is my guess.

Expand full comment
Diana Hembree's avatar

I've heard that another student took his final tests for him, but that person died a few years ago so he can't be contacted.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Apparently all the Trumps supposedly went to Wharton,the whole 'we don't read the financial documents,we just sign them' crew...hehe,😂😂😂

Expand full comment
Morgan's avatar

You’d expect someone from Wharton would have a damn brain but obviously he cheated his way thru school cause he’s dumb as a box of rocks

Expand full comment
Nancy Potter's avatar

Wharton Biz school (the grad school that awards MBA's) is highly selective and has a great reputation. Trump did not go to the Biz school, he was an undergrad in the business department (also called Wharton) which likely isn't as selective. Trump has been pretending for decades that he should get the prestige of the MBA school, when he at best got a bachelor's degree after being pulled through with daddy's money and his sister's help.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Nailed it.

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

He makes the box of rocks look like fucking Einstein!!😂😂

Expand full comment
Marla's avatar

Well, his uncle was a professor at MIT, so that makes him (the Yam) very smart by association.

Or something.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Says he

Expand full comment
JOSEPH PEDALINO, JR.'s avatar

Just like Vance ‘graduated’ from Yale Law School ! Thanks uncle Peter Thiel for making me look like a silicon valley techbro…I’m almost done with your shoes and washing all those cars you own

Expand full comment
Stephen Brady's avatar

I'll bet that is not all he has polished for Peter Thiel.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Oh snap!!

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂😂

Expand full comment
meryl selig's avatar

Truth

Expand full comment
shee-rah's avatar

Did Vance pass the Bar in his state?

Expand full comment
JOSEPH PEDALINO, JR.'s avatar

Its Ohio, no doubt the ‘bar’ is low, maybe underground.

Expand full comment
DonP's avatar

And apparently couldn't be bothered to actually learn anything because he went out and promptly bankrupted 3 casinos.

Expand full comment
Mary Hall's avatar

They were probably Russian money laundering operations.

Expand full comment
DonP's avatar

Naw. They were just his complete inability to actually build something. He bought them out, then decided to make them "classy", which meant gilded everything, he approved cost overruns, and basically spent more on remodeling than the casino was taking in because the remodel had to close parts of the gambling floor. So, he ran out of money.

Expand full comment
Liz and Max the No. 1 Cat's avatar

Yeah, on his own Donald Trump couldn't successfully run a lemonade stand. His only somewhat successful business is the one his father left him and he's working real hard on destroying that one too.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

His businesses only continued because of folks like Allen Weisselberg, who did all the thinking. Dumb Don-old was only a figurehead. In fact, the employees who actually knew WTF they were doing had to present options to him that would steer him, without him realizing it, to make the right choice.

Expand full comment
arne link's avatar

Undoubtedly.

Expand full comment
Morgan's avatar

How many times has that Orange Fuck declared BK??

Expand full comment
DonP's avatar

At least 7.

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

pause there for a sec... the games are statistically loaded in favor of the house. How in the world can you fuck up a casino? It's a license to print money... at least until it gets too old and decrepit to continue. Kinda like trumpet in that respect I guess.

Expand full comment
DonP's avatar

Chris Titus has a great bit about this:

"Do you know how casinos works?

People come with their money.

They hand you ALL their money.

They leave the casino.

Somehow, Donald Trump found the GLITCH in that process!"

Expand full comment
Nancy Potter's avatar

He had qualified people who could have made a go of the casinos, but they died in the helicopter crash shortly before the opening. At that point either he already had such a bad reputation he couldn't get new managers, or he thought he was so smart, he could do it himself.

Expand full comment
Janan Broadbent's avatar

Via $$$$$$

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

And some kid who took the SAT for him

Expand full comment
Morgan's avatar

They’re dumb as stumps and I feel sorry for.. stumps

Expand full comment
Darrell Smith's avatar

It is Joy that broke Trump's brain. He lives in Trump World, which is a dark and gloomy place. Joy is breaking out in the real world and he can't take it. His "press conference" was a good example, with more than two lies or fabrications per minute.

Will Donald go peacefully with the nice doctors when they come for him?

Who cares, as long as he and his family go away.

Expand full comment
Karla's avatar

Sadly I don’t think the joy ticket will grab republicans voters. They are an angry lot and determined to stay that way.

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

The Rethugs are indeed an angry lot...I dont understand why....they feel threatened by anything that isnt them?

Expand full comment
DonP's avatar

It's simple Susan. They are absolutely terrified of change. Any change that makes old, White men no longer the influential, "we're in charge" weirdos they seem to be.

Expand full comment
MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

For years and years, they’ve simmered in their resentment of anyone — women, POC, gays — who helped shift the power paradigm from Only Entitled White Men to Yeah, Let’s Include The Others. They see Donnie as their hero, wrenching back all that lost control.

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

They're enraged 24x7 at whoever Fox tells them to be mad at. It doesn't have to make a lick of sense. They're just marinating in the endorphin high of hating someone else. Every day.

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

oh, and all the other whack-a-doodle right wing angertainment outlets

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

That's it!

Expand full comment
Susan Burgess's avatar

It’s an illness, Susan.

Expand full comment
Susan Burgess's avatar

When you are a liar, a cheater, and a person who invents reality, you project that everyone you meet is the same. That’s a pretty good reason to feel threatened.

Expand full comment
Lynn O’Neal's avatar

Yes

Expand full comment
MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

fuck ‘em.

Expand full comment
Catherine's avatar

Lol

Expand full comment
Ruth Coleman's avatar

But they don’t have enough people to come close to winning. Just need to get a majority of the independents. Amazing how infectious joy actually can be .

Expand full comment
shee-rah's avatar

They will make sure that counties do not certify the votes.

Expand full comment
Nancy Potter's avatar

Trump took them that way. Recall their former saint, Reagan, gave them optimism -- all that shining city on a hill talk. Trump just decided that he could win by appealing to their fears and resentments. But now that they're all mad, it's too late to talk about joy.

Expand full comment
Diana Hembree's avatar

I think the racism of white Christian nationalism has a lot to do with it: https://theintercept.com/2024/08/10/republicans-trump-vance-racism-white-nationalism/

Expand full comment
Wendy's avatar

Yep. I’m sensing he’s trying to emulate that joy but doesn’t have a clue how it’s done. More words? More caps? More arm waving? I’ll be glad to watch the rats abandoning ship.

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

Nick Fuentes did.

Expand full comment
Doc Blase''s avatar

I look forward to visiting his urine-soaked grave.

Expand full comment
Margaret's avatar

Doc, I plan to contribute.

Expand full comment
Deb Martina's avatar

Me too

Expand full comment
the real pambo's avatar

The local dogs and cats will also be happy to contribute, I’m sure! 🐕 🐈 🐩 🐈‍⬛

Expand full comment
Dave Drell's avatar

Does his borrowing a purple heart allow him into Arlington Cemetary?

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

Army joke: the drill sergeant in boot camp says to one of the recruits, "I bet you hate my guts so much, when I die you'll come and piss on my grave!"

"No, Sergeant! When I get out of here I'm never going to stand in a line again!"

Expand full comment
shee-rah's avatar

Just urine?

Expand full comment
Vickie Berry's avatar

https://youtu.be/4rRAfLOhJfU?si=L_mZUBwfzXPv4uUj

It might look like this scene from the movie Harvey with the fabulous Josephine Hull being carried away!

Expand full comment
Dave Drell's avatar

Thats the Maytag repair man - Jesse White carrying her away! lol

Expand full comment
Lynn Van Haren's avatar

Donny Diaperload depends on fear, anger & insecurity. Joy doesn’t compute for him

Expand full comment
Fastball Fredo's avatar

Come on Jeff, Captain Krazy said yesterday if he’s not elected there will not be a Christmas holiday… well, that should be news to all, especially the retail industry. Me? Not my tribe… sad… 🥵🥵🥵🥵

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

Dump said if he wasn't elected there would be no Christmas holiday? OMG! 🤣

Expand full comment
Karla's avatar

Every day of my life will be Christmas.

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

And why did this not happened in 2021, 2022, 2023?

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

He’s on a rant now that Kamala will take away Christmas, in addition to us not having a country anymore. 🤪

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ He’s out of his mind.

Expand full comment
Chris Craddock's avatar

🤡

Expand full comment
meryl selig's avatar

He controls Christmas ? Is anyone trying to get this one “out” and heard? Meme? GIF?

Expand full comment
Richard Von Busack's avatar

Santa doesn’t visit orange douchebags

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Except to leave 'em a lump of coal

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

A truckload would be more appropriate.😂😂

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Whenever the subject is him, and the word load is bandied about, my mind goes to "pantload."

Expand full comment
shee-rah's avatar

Santa will unload a pantload under his tree.

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

LOL

Expand full comment
Nancy Potter's avatar

If his idea of Christmas is scary leafless black trees, or red handmaid trees, maybe I'll stick with Festivus.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

I actually thought Melania was deliberately trying to make the most awful Christmas display possible

Expand full comment
Sharon Hone's avatar

Well she totally accomplished her goal. The Red Christmas Trees! Ghastly!

Expand full comment
meryl selig's avatar

Vicious ugly nightmare Christmas … Melania’s cry for help. (She is not a balanced human either, folks). Committed the original sin of marrying him

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

He married for looks, she married for money. Whether the other "qualities" of each other were evaluated seems questionable, especially on her part. Didn't his fooling around with her while still legally married to Marla tell her something? His swaggering braggadocio? His enormous ego? You made your bed, Mel.

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

Old saying: "Marry for money, and earn every penny"

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Maybe make Xmas a day off for voting.

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

Good idea! 😂

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

That actually might drive down turnout because folks are . . . kinda busy on Christmas.

Expand full comment
Dave Drell's avatar

Doesn’t Vance look like the Grinch?

Expand full comment
Kathleen Weber's avatar

This sign in Hialeah FL is priceless.

“Trust our nation again to the Orange Doodle is like trusting Kristi Noem to walk your poodle."

To view the sign: https://kathleenweber.substack.com/notes

Expand full comment
arne link's avatar

I shared that to my Facebook page. I'm no longer afraid to let my Democrat flag fly.

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

Me either. I’ve been sharing Jessica Valenti’s pro-abortion TikToks to Facebook, Threads, & Substack. I know my Christian Republican family & friends will see them on FB. I also just last week let my family know very clearly that I am an atheist & have zero respect for the fake Christian who vote for any Republican. Fuck it, We are gonna win this election.

Expand full comment
Sharon Hone's avatar

Damn right we are!

Expand full comment
Deb Martina's avatar

Lololol

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Haha, such a great line, "the raccoons in his head chewed through the wires." As for tRump famliy values, they only consist of greed and weird sexual creepiness. See the picture of Barron straddling Melania while holding a camera pointed at her face? WTF!?

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

He's taking future mugshots.

Expand full comment
Nevertheless, She Persisted's avatar

I found the photo, but to be fair, Barron was a kid, like 10. So no, I'm not going to see it as weird.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

Saw it yesterday. Obviously it was before he grew freakishly tall but still it looked a little off. Not in that family, tho’

Expand full comment
Nevertheless, She Persisted's avatar

What? That's it--it's off to the Google for me...

Expand full comment
Neal Stiffelman's avatar

Remember that mafia boss who walked around in his bathrobe and slippers to try to avoid ending his life in prison.

Expand full comment
Fastball Fredo's avatar

Why that was Carlos Gambino… a dear member of the Family.

Expand full comment
Neal Stiffelman's avatar

‘Twas Vincent Gigante.

Expand full comment
HI2thDoc's avatar

He was crazy like a fox to pretend he was crazy

Expand full comment
Robert Eckert's avatar

Whereas Trump is just crazy like fuck

Expand full comment
Anita Smibert's avatar

The Oddfather?

Expand full comment
Susan Niemann's avatar

LOL!!

Expand full comment
Deb Martina's avatar

😂🤣😂🤣

Expand full comment
Charles Austin's avatar

Jimmy "The Chin" Gigante.

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment
spoonbridgecherry's avatar

“ … he’s out there where the buses don’t run” 😂🤣😂

Expand full comment
Alexandra Pitcher's avatar

I love this from the guy whose campaign published a picture of him praying… with six fingers on each hand. Or the barbecue shot of Trump standing around the grill with a group of deliriously happy black voters… some of whom had three arms.

Expand full comment
Susan Kemp's avatar

Was that the barbecue picture in New York with palm trees in the background?

Expand full comment
William Burke's avatar

😂

Expand full comment
Betsy L's avatar

Actually, Jeff, what you need to do in response to Dumpy's fraud claims is show those three video clips of Dumpy doing his royal lightbulb-changing wave at the crowds *who really weren't there* that you showed a couple weeks ago. (Wasn't that your substack? Maybe I've mixed it up with somebody else's.)

Expand full comment
FTrump And FPutin Too's avatar

Exactly, waving at nobody 🤣🤣🤣 outside of his rallies that he hasn’t even been doing lately. No fans for you, President Shitzvonbrains!

Expand full comment
bruce somers's avatar

Ron Filipkowski has them all.

Expand full comment
Karla's avatar

It was his.

Expand full comment
Lynn Van Haren's avatar

No, that was Jeff’s. The media should be doing that

Expand full comment
Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Jeff, you’re right about everything in this post except for one thing: If Trump were my family member, I would NOT be looking for a memory care facility “nearby”. I would be shipping him off to the farthest reaches of the earth (perhaps Siberia), without his phone, where he could never find his way back.

Expand full comment
William Burke's avatar

Excellent point. Scientists have confirmed a direct correlation between stupidity and proximity.

Expand full comment
arne link's avatar

JC on a catamaran? That made me spit out my coffee. Jeff never fails to entertain us.

Expand full comment
Megan Ross's avatar

I spit out my tea!!🤣🤣🤣

Expand full comment
Linda Koepcke's avatar

I love that the Harris/Walz campaign has a Truth Social account. 😂 And they are using it to push his buttons.

Expand full comment
Reese Lakota's avatar

Time magazine has put Kamala on the cover. Something that has yet to happen for Trump.

That oughtta do it. 🤯

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

Omg, he’ll hate that so much. 🤣🤣

Expand full comment
Eva Porter's avatar

I hope she stomps him into the dirt so we can end this shit show of his. Not that it’ll stop Trump but it might make the enabling more difficult.

He’s in “A Face in the Crowd” mode

Expand full comment
Megan Ross's avatar

I have a feeling that Kamala Harris and Tim Walz are going to win in a landslide so "BIGLY" that it will be really difficult for TRump's Cult 45 members to challenge the election results. I'm looking forward to it!!

Expand full comment
Vickie Berry's avatar

Yes, hate and fear has run its course and love and joy are being embraced. 🫶🏼

Expand full comment
MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

I keep thinking about Lucinda Williams’s song “Joy” and how it’s perfect for this exact moment:

I don’t want you anymore, you took my joy

I don’t want you anymore, you took my joy

You took my joy, I want it back

You took my joy, I want it back

Expand full comment
Megan Ross's avatar

I LOVE THAT SONG!! Car Wheels on a Gravel Road is one of my very favorite albums!

Expand full comment
MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

I’ve watched the Austin City Limits concert about 10 times. So Good! ❤️

Expand full comment
Lynn Van Haren's avatar

All they have to do is refuse to certify the results. Has never before happened in the US, but Donny has his people in place

Expand full comment
P. J. Schuster's avatar

And WE have our people in place!! Marc Elias & the Democracy Docket, plus Joe Biden & the DOJ are preparing.

Expand full comment
Robert R's avatar

Joes got it covered three ways from Sunday ! Remember he can’t be in dickted for official acts !

Expand full comment
Megan Ross's avatar

It's a prosecutable offense to not certify the votes of the people. Washington State fined a guy in 2020 for not giving Biden the win and trying to force TRump through. It didn't work. He was threatened with jail time orr a fine. He chose the fine...

Expand full comment
William Burke's avatar

From what I’ve seen, Trump‘s Troops better start stockpiling Ozempic. Someone should study up on Ozempic sales in the red states so we can see what’s going on.

Expand full comment