283 Comments

I wanna see an ad with trump's gibberish going on uninterrupted for a minute, and at the end Joe Biden's voice saying,

“I approved this ad.” With just a hint of a smile in his voice.

Expand full comment

"...whatever it said."

Expand full comment

Kathleen, please send your suggestion to the Biden campaign. It would make me sleep better tonight. Send it to Lincoln Project as well! 👍🏼

Expand full comment

This will work better if it comes out in September or October 2024. It has to be with the kicker: “I'm Joe Biden and I approve this ad.” so it can't be the Lincoln Project. I swear to you on my mother's grave, that I will get in touch with the Biden campaign over the summer. Perhaps by then there will be even juicier idiotic bits to create the ad with.

Expand full comment

I think it might be best to saturate the dolts with non-stop ads. The frustrating thing is that trump is not eligible to run. And it is crystal clear without a shadow of a doubt. Zero doubt. Yet, orange vomit is not being arrested for inciting a deadly seditionist act!…or called out for contempt of court. I fear that when we wait, the Fascists are the ones who throw a surprise at us instead. We can’t let them come up for air when we seem powerless to put these criminals in prison, where anyone else who committed these crimes would be or already been given the death sentence.

Expand full comment

IMO, the best use of money would be to figure out by polling what the true swing states are in the last 6 weeks, And blanket those states with this ad.

Expand full comment

It can be a whole campaign with different incidents, different ads, all approved by Joe Biden. there's plenty of material and it will only keep building. It's perfect!

Expand full comment

I hereby award you suggestion of the month award! Brilliant! Really and truly- this is the PERFECT Biden campaign ad.

Expand full comment

You got me there. Setting all modesty aside, I have to agree with you 100%.

Expand full comment

I want to see Trump up on the altar with the Pentecostal evangelist speaking in tongues - in unison with the pastor. Harmony can come later.

Expand full comment

That was SO bizarre! I have relatives who are Pentecostals, so the whole speaking in tongues thing isn't completely new to me, but I've never seen anything like that before... so yeah, Trump's own brand of word salad would be a great addition to the show!

Expand full comment

Calling Don Winslow!

Expand full comment

Perfect😎😎

Expand full comment

THAT is an awesome idea!

Expand full comment

That's Really Good Kathleen

Expand full comment

stay tuned. surely we will get to see such a marvelous thing.

Expand full comment

Yes for sure!

Expand full comment

He hasn’t gone quite that far yet, but he did do an ad with some of Shitler’s gaffes and posted it on Shitlers crappy app 😂

Expand full comment

He’s circling, and in November it will be time to flush.

Expand full comment

Do we really have to wait that long?

Expand full comment

We may not. His deterioration rate will increase with the pressure he gets from trials. Now is the time for that class action law suit from all his former creditors, many of which are lawyers. The stress has led to a rash on his hands, do you remember seeing those pictures, and who knows what else. Perhaps he can relax at Mar-a-lago, but I'm with Jeff, let's give it to E. Jean Carroll and let her invite the Feds to come in and go over it with a fine tooth comb to see if they can find anything else that is incriminating. Let them go through all of his videos too. Anything in the place. Just not being able to golf there should be enough to send him over the edge, the big cheater, and he won't be able to go to his Scottish greens, because he cannot leave the country with criminal charges pressed against him. https://www.trumphotels.com/turnberry

Here is an article on the mystery of where the money came from for that property. I am hoping that the courts are cataloging his assets as the trials continue, and preparing the paperwork to seize them both in the US and abroad.

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2020/08/the-biggest-trump-financial-mystery-where-he-came-up-with-the-cash-for-his-scottish-resorts/

All of that will cause his poorer donors, who may not realize how much money DJTrump has in all his holdings while they give him their gas money to pay for his legal fees, to note that he is not the poor populist guy he makes himself out to be.

Expand full comment

Even if he did flee, there's an extradition treaty between both the UK and Ireland with the US.

They'd just happily ship his ass back home. Might not even allow him to deplane.

Expand full comment

Exactly! I am sure they would love to do that. Even as the fascists rise in Europe, the rest of the country won't want such a fascist icon.

Expand full comment

This reminds me of an old (gross) site circa 2002 - RateMyPoo.com, and yes, it was exactly what it says.

Expand full comment
Jan 28·edited Jan 28

BUT the water pressure is so bad, so greatly bad, you have to flush, two-three-TEN times, and..................

oldie but goodie!

Expand full comment

Might need a Bigly plunger for that Yuge pile o shit!

Expand full comment

He’s been de-banked. He and Rudy Colludy can fight over couch change and hunt the subway for dropped nickels, dimes, and pizza slices. Scott Dworkin says there are signs posted in NYC: Do not take a check from this man [pic of ‘surrender’ trump]

Expand full comment

Alas, I am sure he has already started fundraising on this, and might be able to raise the $80M that way.

Of course, that would be $80M he couldn't spend on the campaign.

Expand full comment

He can’t use campaign contributions to pay legal fines. Which is delicious.

Expand full comment

Alas, that would mean that he would obey the law (rules), and that the FEC would have the cajones to actually take action. Hell DeSantis stomped all over the campaign finance rules with his "Never Back Down" PAC (laughing that he totally backed down and surrendered) and no actions were taken.

Might as well be dead letter law

Expand full comment

Not that he won't try it...

Expand full comment

Oh he'll use them and the idiots will keep sending him money

Expand full comment

It should be against the law, but apparently it’s common knowledge that he is, in fact, spending millions from one of his PACs to pay his legal bills. DOJ needs to get on the issue

Expand full comment

Undoubtedly. I’m on his email list, I keep looking for the plea. He’s in Las Vegas, so maybe he’ll hit it bigly.

Expand full comment

I know of a few people near Vegas that would like to hit him bigly...

Expand full comment

I’m in Reno, and I would join them.

Expand full comment

Oh, hĕll, I'm in Columbus, OH, and I'd like to get in on that!

Expand full comment
founding

Sorry, Pizza Rat has the dropped pizza slice franchise.

Expand full comment

That’s exactly the image I had in my head.

Expand full comment
founding

🤣🤣🤣

Expand full comment

🤣🤣

Expand full comment

That fucking fucker is a fucked fuck? Fuckgratulations, you fucking deserve it, Fuckface Fuckenheimer III.

Expand full comment

Fuckface Fuckenheimer III, President of Dumbfuckistan.

Expand full comment

When the word “fuck” is the perfect descriptive! 😄!

Expand full comment

I find that the word "fuck" is the perfect descriptive in a wide range of situations, but especially as used here.

Expand full comment

Ranked dead last in education and having no natural exports, it is the world's only nation to be declared a completely useless pimple on the arse of the world.

Expand full comment

😅😅🤣🤣😂😂😆😆

Expand full comment

Ahahaha hahaha 🥂

Expand full comment
founding

Isn’t Dumbfuckistan next door to Shitstainstan? I seem to recall they used to be one country?

Expand full comment

🤣🤣🤣

Expand full comment

I’m sticking with JT‘s “King Fuckface the First” for now. It’s just a different form of music to my ears.

Expand full comment

I wouldn't want the idea to go to his head.

Expand full comment

THIS!!!! 🤣🤪🤣

Expand full comment

💀

Expand full comment

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Expand full comment

Man-women-child-rapist-grifter

Expand full comment

Woman-child rapist, grifter, loser

Expand full comment

It's worse than that. If he goes the bond route, then he will have to put up 20% (so $16.6M) and then collateral to cover the other 80%.

But since he has a financial monitor overseeing his family business, he really doesn't have unfettered access to those assets, and that might make it impossible for him to post collateral.

Delish!

Expand full comment
author

is it 20%? I thought that in New York State it was 10%, but I couldn't find a definitive link to a hard number, so I left it vague in my post.

Expand full comment

TBH, that is the rate that all the bondsmen here charge, so that was an assumption. Still, he needs to also post collateral to move forward.

Expand full comment

E Jeans attorneys were on Maddow & they explained that he has to put up the entire amount, plus he has to pay interest from now til the appeal is decided.

Expand full comment

Wonder if he's hit up Jared for some of those billions of Saudi shekels to cover his legal fines.

Expand full comment
founding

He says: "We're very close to World War III" and the MAGGOTS CHEER???? Hoping for an early rapture, are they? I'll stay behind, thanks.

Expand full comment

I highly encourage the rapture!! I hope it takes all the people who believe in it. 😬

Expand full comment
Jan 28·edited Jan 28

The way I understand it, the people "left behind" will be the type of people I count as friends, so bring it on. Though, I wonder if the oft predicted rapture has already happened and there weren't many who qualified so no one noticed, making all the believers in rapture and eternally boring heaven also "left behind". I wonder if that possibility keeps any of the believers awake at night. Probably not.

Edit: Should have read on. Point already made.

Expand full comment
founding

Me too! LOL!

Expand full comment

Oh hon....the Rapture has come and gone. They already have been left behind.

Expand full comment
founding

🤣🤣🤣

Expand full comment

Sharon, didn’t Frumpy say “We’re very close to WWII.” And of course the crowd of his MAGA 🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑 cheered him on with his rambling.

Expand full comment

'zactly! Spending eternity with those sanctimonious fumducks does not have the appeal they think it does.

Expand full comment

I'm with you. Not that the armaments in MAGA hands aren't dangerous and capable of inflicting a lot of damage and killing a lot of people (and clearly, they have no problem with killing a lot of people, even kids) -- but I usually think of WWIII as being nuclear, and Joe's got the football. Even tffg's former advisors wouldn't let him anywhere near it (at least not the real one with the live switch) As usual tffg's just making shit up.

Expand full comment

Between the money and the brain mash, which will consume him first? My thoughts are when the money goes, so goes him. He’s a paper doll being left out in the rain. Let it pour!

Expand full comment

Old Vodka Sweats. 🤣🤣 Good luck Rudy...you'll never get a dime outta LDFF. I seriously wonder if we dont see Diaper Don have a serious health scare under all this pressure. Given he is an evil old fuck, I would delight in that scene. He wont even have enough money left for ketchup. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Expand full comment

It is important that he retains what little there is left of his sanity to get at least one guilty verdict from Jack Smith so that he can be sentenced to prison for the rest of his fucking life!

Expand full comment

I agree. Nothing would please me more than to see him walk into a cell and they toss the key.

Expand full comment

That would be delicious

Expand full comment

ME TOO

Expand full comment

You’re right, otherwise he’ll end up in a luxurious asylum, not in jail

Expand full comment

Like my mom used to say “No self-respecting germ would light on him”. Lol

Expand full comment

Every maga donation goes straight to E Jean at this point. Gonna have to play that violin for McConnell also. Boohoo.

Expand full comment

Anther Biden Campaign ad….Thanks to the Maga crowd, money sent to trump is going to E Carroll. Now that’s justice!

Expand full comment

It's a beautiful song, too. 😂

Expand full comment

Except campaign funds cannot be used for anything else, so he’s going to have to sell assets, like his buildings.

Expand full comment

Apparently 'Leadership PAC' funds can be used for anything. It's still a whole lot of money that won't be going for GOP senate or house races.

Expand full comment

He would never willingly give money to anyone else, so his money wouldn’t go to GOP races anyway.

Expand full comment

Btw love the little violin😂

Expand full comment

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Expand full comment

Gotta love it. Plus this has to change Melania's plans for wanting to take his pathetic crooked ass to the cleaners in divorce court. Hell, by the time it's all said and done, his pot to piss in and the window to throw it out of may be long gone.

Expand full comment
founding

“Be best Sugar Daddy” is now “Be gone Loser!”

Expand full comment

Yes, her timing has not been good!

Expand full comment

Poor Donnie,no money,no friends, no nookie ,no brain function,probably running low on Pampers,Oh well! Theirs always Social Security!Oh shit probably didn’t pay into the fund ! Hey Vlad old pal, how bout you putting me up in the Kremlin for a few days? Nyet! You stink like shit Fuckface ! Go wash 🧼 your dripping KaKa ass! Go to sty sleep 😴 with 🐷 pigs if they’ll have you ! Fucken moron!

Expand full comment

Maybe next Wednesday... it's what I've been waiting for, the E.Jean Carroll result was an unexpected cherry on top. I hope the judge for nxt weds isn't intimidated to put up Bigly Numbers, the best numbers.

Expand full comment

"no one else knows it's 93..." lol omg I am laughing so hard right now...but I have laryngitis, so I sound more like a squeaky rocking chair. It feels so damn good to laugh this hard at him

Expand full comment

Got laryngitis too so, laughing through my nose not a pretty picture 😂😂

Expand full comment
Jan 28Liked by Jeff Tiedrich

Trump: “multiply 4,733, multiply it times 7, divide — without paper and pencil, by the way — divide it by 4, add up another 37 … and a half. point five, I remember that.”

Interviewer: “Wow! How impressive sir. So what’s the answer?”

Trump: “To what?”

Expand full comment
founding

He is what he is and probably can’t help it. What’s got the burr under my saddle is the people standing in front of microphones saying, “I support Donald Trump”.

They do know better. Most of them know more Trumpisity than we do and they STILL stand there and say, “I support all this insupportable, stupid, mind blowing, democracy-destroying, career ending, inexplicably popular killer insanity; so send me some money.”

Them’s the little buggers I really despise - the ones propping him up.

Expand full comment

And those are the democracy destroying politicians we need to vote out of office! Every damn one of them needs to be gone!

VOTE BLUE 💙💙💙💙 in ‘24, ‘26, ‘28, all in between and beyond!!!

Expand full comment

By law, they should have been REMOVED from Congress. We need to clear out every right wing judge and NEVER, EVER, EVER let a rt winger on SCOTUS.

Expand full comment

I agree, those people are the burr in my shoes too, and fox news had a big hand in all this-the outrage brigade on their stupid "programming " 🙄

Expand full comment
founding

There’s a special place in hell for Rupert Murdoch..

Expand full comment

If you read Mary Trump’s book about him, you come to understand that he’s like that because his father, Fred, propped him up both psychologically & financially, almost all his life. In his old age Fred had Alzheimer’s, so maybe LDFF is headed down that path?

Expand full comment
founding

Actually, I did read Mary’s book. Both Fred and the missus were oddballs even for the day. (Everything was different then - worse in my humble opinion). Yes, Fred acknowledged that Donald had the worst judgment of anyone he knew, but Donald was the eldest son so he got everything. German immigrants on dad’s side and Scottish immigrants on mom’s side, Donald got olde worlde (sic) treatment.

Strangely, even though I’m five years older than King Donnie, I never knew who he was until that infamous escalator ride with the escort-turned-nude model-turned-wife #3.

Expand full comment

Leave him out there and let him ramble. A reasonable strategy. I’m still waiting to see him shit himself loudly in stage. Then waddle off to “Macho Man”. Who’s his new “body man” these days?

Expand full comment

Because of the man girdle he wears, he has to have an attendant wipe his ass when he fills his man diaper. On his pretend-I'm-rich Apprentice show the man assigned to that task was nick-named "Wet Wipes'.

Expand full comment

That unfortunate person is comedian Noel Caster who openly talks about having to clean up Shitler's rancid butt. There are interviews with him about that and what a raging druggie Shitler is.

Expand full comment

Casler.

Expand full comment

Thank you for the clarification.

Expand full comment
founding

🤮🤮🤮

Expand full comment

Precisely! I would demand a 6-figure salary for that loathsome job.

Expand full comment

Rudy’s a very experienced wipe ass and he needs the money,,,Oh shit what am I thinking?? He’s already into Rudy’s pocket for who knows how much!?To bad Rudy,and you know the terrain so well,your heads been up it so long you could be his appendix!

Expand full comment

Trumps denouement is so

SCHADENFREUDELICIOUS 😋

It has umami 👅

Expand full comment

Agreed. But will it take him down? Probably not. He's one of those monsters in the movies you think is dead but keeps coming back.

Expand full comment

He is definitely weakened, though.

Expand full comment

😂😂😂😂

Expand full comment

Melania: I leave Donald now. He broke as fuck now.

Expand full comment
founding

If he truly goes broke, I wonder if she can sue him for breach of contract. You know there's a signed piece of paper somewhere that promises her some serious scratch.

Expand full comment

And Trump would tell her, "I made you famous!" :D

Expand full comment

and first fucking lady!

Expand full comment

Not to mention getting her and the family into the States , I wonder if he’s going to the joint ,does the wife and family get deported to good old Slovakia 🇸🇰 what’s that fuck off word again ?

Expand full comment

I slurped up every word of today's column. It was super-yummy - forward-worthy. Gonna read it again with a hot cup of coffee.

Expand full comment

Me too, particularly titillating 😆today

Bravo Jeff!

Expand full comment