decrepit draft dodger declares war on Chicago
Donny’s gonna make an apocalypse ... in his pants
remember those glorious days when Donny disappeared from public view for a whole week, leaving us to speculate that maybe, at long last, he’d been grimly reaped?
that was fun, wasn’t it? but it wasn’t just fun, it was peaceful. America got to catch its breath and actually relax for a change.
no such luck this weekend, my friends. the Mad King’s firehose of fucknuttery has been turned back on — all the way to eleven — and it’s blasting right in our faces at point-blank range. lucky us.
America’s Internet Troll-in-Chief posted a real beaut on his failing app yesterday.
oh look, it’s some AI slop of Donny tarted up as Colonel Kilgore from Apocalypse Now, declaring war on Chicago. just a perfectly normal president doing perfectly normal stuff, right?
this nightmare fuel is so many things, none of them good.
first of all, it’s an insult to actual veterans.
Illinois Senator Tammy Duckworth was an Army helicopter pilot who left both her legs in Iraq.
now let’s compare that to Donny’s stellar record of service. when asked by his government to defend his country, Donny got his tyrant Klansman father to find a quack doctor to gin up a bullshit note about imaginary bone spurs. ‘I’m sorry, Donny can’t go to war. he has a boo-boo on his foot.’
so yes, take off that fucking Cavalry hat, you cosplaying coward.
but it’s more than disrespectful. it’s unhinged. it’s dangerous. it’s fascistic. what kind of president posts images of attack helicopters and fiery explosions over an American city, and gloats about ‘going to war’ against his own people? it’s insane.
it’s un-American.
governors of states shouldn’t have to educate their people about how to deal with a lawless federal government, but welcome to America in the year 2025.
in any sane world, Governor Pritzker wouldn’t have to be explaining the difference between judicial warrants and administrative warrants. he wouldn’t have to be providing links to forms for children to fill out to find where their parents have been disappeared to.
but we don’t live in a sane world — and none of this shit is normal.
and, as always, Donny acting the fool and tweeting out childish cartoons of himself is just so fucking embarrassing. we’re an international laughingstock. even other autocracies are laughing at us.
if we have to be ruled over by a fascist, couldn’t it at least be one who isn’t a clownish cum-sock?
look at Viktor Orbán’s not-twitter feed. it’s normal. .
oh my god, this shit’s so boring — just like an autocrat’s supposed to be.
no infantile memes. no needy preening. he’s not calling himself ‘your favorite prime minister.’
look at Erdogan over in Turkey. his tweets will absolutely put you to sleep.
fuck you, Donny, for making me jealous of other autocracies.
Donny’s despot bestie Putin hasn’t tweeted in years, but when he did? so ho-hum.
come on, Vladimir. you’re not even trying. couldn’t you at least have said it was a telephone conversation like no one’s ever seen?
thank you for you attention to this matter, Vlad.
in fact, the only autocrats as crazypants as our own Mad King are fictional — like General Garcia from the In-Laws.
how long before Donny paints eyes and a mouth on his rotting fist and asks visitors if they want to kiss Señor Pepe?
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO SEÑOR PEPE.
remember when our government agencies used to shut the fuck up and just do their jobs? for instance, the Department of Labor. no one ever heard a peep from Labor. you just assumed they were out there somewhere, laboring it up for the good of the country.
no more. now even the Department of Labor has to be in your face, pumping out fascistic drek to please Dear Leader.
hey, you know who else used to put out posters like this, encouraging its blond white young men with impossibly-cut cheekbones casting dramatic shadows to build for their country’s future? of course you do.
and it’s not good enough to be as fascistic as Dear Leader. you also have to be just as clownfuckingly ignorant as he is.
America used to lead the world in scientific and technological advances. not any more. now, every government agency has to push the same simple-minded nonsense as President Fuckwit, who imagines he knows more about sciencing than all the sciencers.
why do we have to be the dumbest nation on Earth? I guarantee you that Orbán and Erodgan understand how storage batteries work.
these countries are laughing at us.
speaking of Dear Leader, he’s going to attend the US Open tennis tournament in New York today — and he’s going to get mercilessly booed, because of course he is. welcome to New York, asshole. we loathe you with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns.
if you’re watching it at home on your TV, however, you’re not going to hear any of that shit.
US Open broadcasters have been asked not to show any negative crowd reactions to Donald Trump at Sunday’s men’s final.
An email sent to broadcasters by organizers reveals that the 79-year-old will be shown on screen during the singing of the national anthem ahead of the match.
The message adds: “We ask all broadcasters to refrain from showing any disruptions or reactions in response to the president’s attendance in any capacity.”
oh noes, we can’t hurt Dear Leader’s fee-fees by broadcasting evidence of just how hated he is. he might get a bone spur.
the fact is, heckling Donny and giving him the finger at sporting events is a sacred tradition as old as Donny himself.
look, Donny, if you don’t want to be laughed at, try to be less of a fool — and if you don’t want to be booed, try being less hateful.
it’s that simple.
here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
832 / 921
Or….if you don’t want to be booed……how about moving to Russia to be with your buddy Vlad? That would make us all happy…oh and take your cabinet buddies with you! Thanks….
This country is an embarrassment. Those posters are hideous, so un-American and disrespectful to people like the heroic Tammy Duckworth. We have a bunch of sick bastards running this country now. Trump will be booed mercilessly today the US Open and it will be well deserved. There’s your poll Donny-everyone hates you - in your home city and borough