confused old fuckwit imagines he’s won the World Cup

who acts like this?

Little Donny Fuckface is why the world can’t have nice things.

immediately following Spain’s victory over Argentina in the 2026 World Cup final, Donny — in his divine role as President of the United States, Supreme Ruler of the Western Hemisphere, Lord-Emperor of the Sky Above and All the Planets, and God’s Own Avatar on Earth — presented the winning team with their trophy.

and then, the stupid shit wouldn’t get off the stage. he just stood there like the malignant narcissistic lump he is, and tried to make Spain’s joyous moment all about himself.

oh, how wonderful — Donny’s found himself a camera to preen into, as FIFA president Gianni Infantino struggles mightily to get him the fuck out of there.

look at this vainglorious, self-centered toad, basking the unearned glory of a victory that was never his. he’s so serenely pleased with himself.

yo, Donny — I just got off the phone with Mitch McConnell. he said to stop being a childish asshole. don’t make me get Lindsey Graham on the phone next.

how hilarious is it Gianni Infantino, who has tried so hard to ingratiate himself with Donny, eternally flattering him, and forever festooning him with fake prizes, had to be the one to pull him aside and be all ‘hey numb-nuts, what the fuck?’

now let’s watch as the UK Guardian wins every journalism award in existence with this brutal photo caption.

“Gianni Infantino carefully explains to Donald Trump that he is not part of the spanish national team.”

here’s the video of Infantino sprinting across the stage and trying to get Donny the hell out of there.

now keep in your mind the moment where the Spanish team joyously leaps into the air, because check out what Spain did when they posted that image to social media — they cropped Donny out of the photo.

that’s right, Spain wasn’t about to let some dilapidated pantload ruin their moment.

but that’s what you get when you partner with Donny, and Infantino should have seen this coming a mile away. ‘look at me, look at me, look at me’ is how malevolent narcissists roll, and no amount of careful explanation of how ‘you shouldn’t be hogging the spotlight right now’ is every going to penetrate Dear Leader’s fat waterlogged head.

after all, this is the guy who rudely shoved the Prime Minister of Montenegro aside, for committing the heinous crime of blocking Donny’s access to the camera.

invite Donny into your life, and he’ll find some way to fuck you over. we all see this happen again and again and again, and nobody ever learns their lesson. everyone thinks they’re going to be the one who will finally be able to handle this out-of-control toddler.

Gianni Infantino bent over backwards to curry favor with Donny. he shamelessly flattered him every chance he could. he allowed Donny to steal last year’s World Cup trophy. remember that dollop of dumbfuckery? Infantino brought the trophy to the Oval Bordello, just to show it off, and when he tried to leave, Donny was all ‘this is mine now’ — leaving Gianni no choice but to present the winning team with a cheap fake that he had to scramble at the last minute to have made.

that should have been Infantino’s first clue that he was dealing with an immature diaper-baby, but he didn’t learn.

Gianni then ginned up a bogus peace prize and awarded it to his pal, just so Donny would stop his incessant whining about never having won the Nobel Peace Prize that in his mind he so rightfully deserved, for having ended every war ever.

spoiler alert: Donny gleefully hung that worthless trinket right below his neckgina, but that didn’t stop him from continuing to whine about the Nobel.

and just two weeks ago, Infantino stepped in to reverse a ref’s decision to bar a US player from appearing in a critical match, giving the US team an unfair advantage.

and what did Gianni get out of doing any of that shit for Donny? bupkis. an embarrassing moment for him, for Donny, for America and for the entire world.

it’s all so fucking pointless and stupid.

at least Donny didn’t try to pilfer this year’s trophy. I guess we should all be grateful for that.

---

now let’s pour one out for Maria Bartiromo, and keep her in our thoughts and prayers, because she’s experiencing some extreme cognitive dissonance right now.

“CENTCOM says that there will be outsized action in retaliation, but I don’t understand how it’s possible that Iran has the capabilities to fight this way, and continue to try to lash out at Gulf countries and US military bases, because the U.S. has obliterated Iran’s military, and the president continues to reiterate that.”

oh, Maria. you are this close to getting it.

who wants to tell her? ooh! ooh! can I be the one?

Maria, Dear Leader has been lying to you. he hasn’t obliterated shit, and that’s why Iran is continuing to attack US bases across the Gulf region.

but Maria Bartiromo is never going to get it, because her paycheck is dependent on her not getting it.

so she’s going to continue to furrow her brow and peer into the camera in a state of confusion as she wonders aloud why the world is not as Donny says it is.

---

everything fucking sucks right now, so let’s just enjoy twenty-one seconds of Donny and his pet monkey Gianni getting booed by the crowed at MetLife Stadium.

you gotta love it when ‘Donny gets booed’ is one of the top stories of the day.

chef’s kiss. ten out of ten. no notes.

---

and now for some Daily Claudia.

here’s a triptych from the patio on April 15, 2024.

have a great Monday, everyone. don’t go hogging any glory that’s not yours.

---

here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.

---

this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:

practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.

to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.

we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.