570 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

once again, there's way too much going on to write about it all. I didn't even get to Donny's neck, which is now rotting away just like his hand.

https://bsky.app/profile/cnn.com/post/3mg45leueln2k

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

or this lunacy, where Donny brags about being able to go to war "forever."

https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116163464520215003

Susan Niemann's avatar

So, I saw this in Raw Story and Jonathon Larsen's column...tomorrow you should write about how commanders are urging troops to: "not be 'afraid' as to what is happening with our combat operations in Iran right now," that non-commissioned officer said in a complaint filed Monday. "He urged us to tell our troops that this was 'all part of God’s divine plan' and he specifically referenced numerous citations out of the Book of Revelation referring to Armageddon and the imminent return of Jesus Christ."

"He said that 'President Trump has been anointed by Jesus to light the signal fire in Iran to cause Armageddon and mark his return to Earth,'" the complaint continued. "He had a big grin on his face when he said all of this which made his message seem even more crazy."

Lucius's avatar

Sadistic end times bullshit has been a staple of evangelical Christianity since it's inception. Given how badly it's metastasized into the military in particular, it's not surprising to hear about that. If anything, it's surprising we haven't heard more of it and sooner.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Yes, and one of the proponents of this "end times" b.s., Mike Huckabee, is our ambassador to Israel. Only the best!

Mike Hammer's avatar

The human rapture.

arne link's avatar

Do they not read any other part of the bible?

Paula Dean's avatar

I just know they have never read or heard the Gospels. They have the impression that Jesus was all about condemning sinners, hating the homosexuals, screaming at women as they went into Planned Parenthood, and selling investment portfolios. Their Jesus drove over immigrants in his solid gold chariot, scolded women for working outside the home, and complimented them on their tattoos, big breasts and puffed up lips, bleached blonde hair - covered, of course, with a veiled MAGA hat. He told the men to keep their women in line with strict discipline and perpetually pregnant while the men worked as "money changers" on Wall Street.

This is fun! I could keep going....but I won't. *sigh

Susan Niemann's avatar

HA! 👏👏👏👏👏

Robert Eckert's avatar

elseweb: whenever you ask "What Would Jesus Do?" remember that flipping over tables in a place of worship and chasing out the moneygrubbers with a horsewhip is among the options.

Joan Diehl's avatar

Thanks Paula. I needed that post!

T L Mills's avatar

No. Only the parts that confirm their own biases. The Bible is a smorgasbord, dontcha know?!

Robert Eckert's avatar

Fundies tried to read the whole Bible, liked Genesis, sort of liked Exodus, got bogged down in Leviticus, so they skipped to Revelation so they could say they read it cover to cover. Therefore they conclude that religion is all about creationism, Israel, sexual purity rules, and end times scenarios.

Dr J's Sanity Space's avatar

No, only the “good” parts!

Carol C's avatar

Lucius, yes, it is sadistic. Why Christians would find that appealing, I never could figure out. The most punishing recorded act of Jesus was overturning the tables of the money changers and chasing them away from the temple. Other than that Jesus was known for healing the sick and feeding the hungry and advising his followers to treat others as they themselves wish to be treated.

Lucius's avatar

Jesus also kills a tree for not bearing fruit out of season, uses a racial slur to refer to the woman at the well, and in revelations he slaughters a lot of people.

Big J is just as inconsistent and contradictory as the rest of the Bible.

Carol C's avatar

The Book of Revelations is not one of the Four Gospels. No slaughtering in those, which were written nearer in time to the life of Jesus.

rlritt's avatar

Actually it is the reverse. Jesus spoke to a Samaritain woman at the well. At that time Jewish men were forbidden to talk to a Samaritain and actually forbidden to address any woman.

Joan Diehl's avatar

Thank you, Lucius!

arne link's avatar

I think that is a different Christianity, not the sadistic one.

T L Mills's avatar

Apparently the location of the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs is ground zero for the Book of Revelations (which is mostly bullshit) and End Times Evangelism in the military. Instead of bombing Iran back into the Paleolithic era, we can burn out the rot infecting the military...starting with THEM.

Lucius's avatar

Colorado springs is home to one of the super influential evangelical churches, yeah. I can't remember which one off the top of my head.

But I completely agree with the burning though!

arne link's avatar

Wow. Crazy religious people? And here I thought they only existed in Iran. Color me flummoxed.

Joyce's avatar

Yeah--I was thinking about this yesterday, while everyone in the administration was trying to come up with a new explanation of why we're at war......

The reason we are bombing the shit out of Iran, in order to get Iran to bomb the shit out of other Middle Eastern nations, is so that the Christian loons running the US can get their rapture. Apparently, their god won't do it until the Middle East goes up in flames.

To all of them, this actually makes sense.

Cyndi's avatar

I wish it even could happen.

I wanna be left behind in the far better world once They are gone.

Jan Moon's avatar

We can't forget that the Jewish people need to build their third temple so Jesus can come down and preside over the sacrifices. I'm not making this up.

Lisa Bieber's avatar

Boy will they be surprised!

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

What is their reason for killing all those children and babies?

CA Productions/Carol Ann's avatar

Are you fucking kidding. If I was one of these troops I would disobey the orders.

MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

As they all should. They swear an oath to the Constitution, the nation, and the rule of law, not to the illegal dictates of a singular raving psychopath who’s bypassing all of those entities.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I hope when their rapture comes they all go to wherever they’re going and leave the rest of us alone. Crazy loons…🙄

Stephen Brady's avatar

But they are going off to Jesus while we get the tab...

Joe Bacon's avatar

Add this--John Hagee is having an orgasm over Trump's Iran War saying that Armageddon is at hand and JC will be doing the rapture any second now

https://www.friendlyatheist.com/p/texas-megachurch-pastor-john-hagee

How do you convince a congregation full of Jesus lovers that they should fully get behind yet another irresponsible war of choice waged by another Republican president who has no concern about the consequences of his actions that will inevitably result in countless innocent casualties?

If you’re John Hagee, the firebrand preacher behind the non-denominational Cornerstone Church in San Antonio, Texas, you air a literal pro-war infomercial right before the start of your “Epic Fury”-themed sermon.

Hagee spent the next 40 minutes injecting his poisonous propaganda directly into the veins of his congregation, telling them (without citations, naturally) that Trump had “tried to reach a peaceful solution with Iran to no avail.” He ignored the nuclear deal President Obama made with Iran which constrained its ability to build such weapons—which Trump later dismantled due to ignorance, jealousy, or a toxic mix of both—referring to it backhandedly as a “bribe to keep the peace.” And he insisted that now Israel “could enter a season of unprecedented peace,” ignoring how Benjamin Netanyahu has been a cheerleader for war for his political advantage.

Major Kong's avatar

2,000 years of "any day now."

Charles Austin's avatar

Ehh Boy!🤦🤦🤦😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

Schnauzermom's avatar

Oh my fucking god. Drunky Pete is going full-on GI Joe cosplay and his minions are singing Onward Christian Soldier. Meanwhile, a war-not war is being waged by America because Donny is Bibi’s lapdog.

Stephen Brady's avatar

Delusional 'thinking' seems to be a thing with the MAGA crowd including dear leader.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I'd definitely go AWOL if I heard that kind of shit!!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Wow Susan. That is fucking scary. Dr Strangelove is alive and well….uh…not exactly well but alive nonetheless.

A cautionary tale becomes a very real reality. God help us all ( well, if there actually was a god, and he was a decent dude, or woman, he would strike down Trump and all his crazy enablers. That not having happened puts the final nail in the coffin and closes the case that there is in fact no god)

And don’t give me that bullshit about “don’t sell god short…he works in mysterious ways” — no, no, no! He doesn’t work at all. He plays golf every other day…and never stops cheating at it. It’s true. Ask maga.

Ralph Roberts's avatar

The fact that Trump is still alive is proof there is no god.

Donna Marie's avatar

Will they all Rapture up? I'll pop the corn.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I’ll bring a case of beer and it’ll be a party! 😂😂

Cathy Wray's avatar

ahow about a few kegs?

Kimberly's avatar

JFC. I can't believe anyone uttering this drivel is in command of soldiers. When it is enough? Now. NOW. We have to stop this nonsense.

Susan Niemann's avatar

Completely agree…. the “Christian” right is pushing for their moment. I hope all of them are hovered up into the rapture and leave the rest of us alone. Just crazy.

Karen Hall's avatar

It’s absolutely insane. All of it.

Gordon Berry's avatar

That's Not "over the top".. it's "below the bottom" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jennifer's avatar

LOL The "preventative cream" is *causing* a rash.

They really think we're all as dumb as they are.

Bob Bowden's avatar

“Preventative” cream?? It failed to prevent whatever the fuck disease it is, that’s visibly eating away at him. That disease needs to finish him off NOW, before he finishes off all of human civilization

Jennifer's avatar

It could be a flesh-eating bacteria but I don't think we're that lucky.

DebJS's avatar

I'm wondering if radiation for cancer treatment could burn the skin like that?

Madeline B's avatar

and yet fears he will be forgotten after the crypt is sealed ......twice .

Leu2500's avatar

dumbshit never heard of OPSEC. I had already emailed my congresscritters, but when I read that I had to write again.

Wendymae's avatar

I can't believe I clicked on that TS link but since I have, I am wondering how it is possible for the mad king to have built up the arms supply to this unlimited amount at the same time Biden ran through them. FFS.

And we also know that the couchfucker clip is old because he expressed empathy, which we all know is verboten now.

Mps's avatar

Every time I go to Truth Social I feel dirty and complicit.

Sue Munda's avatar

I have to make a new profile, leave my comment (like, you’re a pathetic pos!), then I delete myself. Lol!

rlritt's avatar

That makes sense if understand that in Trump's world, he is the only person who matters. So forever means until he is gone when the world will cease to exist.

Lucius's avatar

I mean, dude's basically three untreated venereal diseases in a trench coat. It was inevitable.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Lucius that is a perfect description! Well done! The visuals on that deserves an academy nomination!

Susan Niemann's avatar

😵‍💫😂😂

Crystal M's avatar

Only three??!! 🤣🤣🤣🤮🤢

Mike Hammer's avatar

Or the last one in a human caterpillar.

Tess's avatar

Rotting away—hope it started in his feet and is now to his neck!😡

MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

I hope it’s something fatal.

Ole Anderson's avatar

It’s tertiary syphilis. Classic symptom

Carol JLH's avatar

Tertiary syphilis sounds like a lovely end for him. I will visualize it and send positive syphilitic thoughts his way.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Nah. It’s likely just a precancerous skin spot. Unfortunately.

Sue's avatar

I think you're right. There is a chemotherapy cream that is applied to precancerous lesions for a few weeks and as it kills the cells, it causes irritation/scabs that heal once the cream is no longer used. That doesn't seem to explain his hand, though.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Nope. The hand is likely an injection site. For what, I don’t know.

William Burke's avatar

Maybe melanoma snuck into the Epstein files and tried to strangle him?

KP Johnson Austin, TX's avatar

Precancerous is still "pre"....Let's keep our fingers crossed for what comes after pre.

Cathy Wray's avatar

I wish Melanoma was Mrs. Bobbit.🔪

arne link's avatar

It's too small to get a decent grip on it. She's just waiting for him to die.

bakeneko's avatar

Necrotizing fasciitis certainly has an appropriate name: https://www.healthlinkbc.ca/healthlinkbc-files/necrotizing-fasciitis-flesh-eating-disease

But I'm also partial to the idea of his having contracted the New World screwworm (Cochliomyia hominivorax) from eating infected 'hamberders'.

Lucius's avatar

I hope it started at his neck and is rapidly working its way in and up.

Gordon Berry's avatar

Hopefully already eating away - after all it's mostly empty!

Leu2500's avatar

I think it's working from the inside out.

Mara's avatar

Encouraging!!

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Maybe Putin has finally had enough of him.

Eileen's avatar

😆Putin hit his bottom. Hilarious. A little radioactive cream for Donny!

Doc Blase''s avatar

Man. Wow. Yeah. 🏆

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Putin loves his puppet Sharon, Russian oil is about to hit record highs!

Whineboy's avatar

Agreed. Leprosy could be fun (although I believe it’s now treatable).

Gina's avatar

leprosy is ssssllllooooowwwwww

DebJS's avatar

It seems like nobody mentioned it to him and now that he's been made aware from media reports and photos, it will be covered in the same makeup foundation as his hands and/or that devilish wrap-around scarf he donned recently. The explanations should be ... interesting.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

It definitely started in his grey matter Tess!

-Comment-'s avatar

Yeah, it looks like the Siph.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I thought the same thing. That would be a perfect ending, wouldn't it? 🙌

Charles Austin's avatar

Tertiary Sypylis. Ain't that a bitch!😂😂😂😂😂

bruce somers's avatar

You should never get skin cream from Diddy.

Lucius's avatar

Antibiotic resistant one hopes.

Eva's avatar

That’s from pulling his head out of Netanyahu’s ass.

As for dear leader, notice how excited he gets about his ballroom? The rest was just recitation. The ballroom? Oh! The BALLROOM!

Mingo's avatar
Mar 3Edited

It looks like shingles which is dormant in our bodies if you've ever had chicken pox. Stress can bring it on. He should probably be under contact isolation. Let's roll him and his whacked out cabinet members in the gaudy gold drapes and throw them in the pit that used to be the East Wing. It's in Piss Drunk Pete's bible about throwing the evildoers into the pit. Let's go Old Testament on their asses.

KP Johnson Austin, TX's avatar

I always pray for added stress and high blood pressure for him and his cronies.

Mps's avatar

I hope it’s shingles, very painful

Kay-El's avatar

His brain is rotting from the inside out

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

CA Productions/Carol Ann's avatar

I am wating on multiple blood vessels to burst at the same time

arne link's avatar

Dear Lord, hear our prayer.

Cheri Collins's avatar

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Carol Jacobson's avatar

Preferably in what passes as his brain.

Doc Blase''s avatar

That would be a stroke.... of luck. With subdural hematoma as a chaser.

CA Productions/Carol Ann's avatar

Come to think about it……Trump wants to go out with a Bang, somebody should make that happen…..sooner than later. He and Bennie are two despots and are clinging to power….I don’t know about you, but I am sick of that little bastard in Isreal sucking the life out of American money and support.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

About that thing on his neck, I especially delighted in the theory of him suffering the agony of shingles!

but having been treated for ak’s and basal cell skin cancer, it’s a whole lot more likely that the product Fluorouracil aptly also referred to as FU is the culprit. It’s painful as hell, but unfortunately that pain is only temporary

Also piss drunk Pete and his Armageddon war to volley forth Jesus armed with an AK-47 and nuclear missiles on a white horse has been pounded into the brains of our military by their commanders. Somebody please make it stop.

Doc Blase''s avatar

There's a cream that can cure it; Polonium-210.

Ann Anderson's avatar

The "rash" looks like shingles to me, and I hope it hurts like hell. There. I said it. BTW, GOP senators sent a warning to Dipshit about Iran not ... I dunno, getting out of hand? Too late, junior dipshits, that missle has flown.

Pat Ebervein's avatar

All that time playing golf certainly hasn’t helped his looks (never a good looker from the get go; worse yet with the toll time takes. Ewww, those piggy eyes). Any bets he’s using a chemo cream to mitigate a skin cancer condition?

s.Michael Morgan's avatar

Preventative, my ass. It looks like genital herpes to me.

Cyndi's avatar

From research and discussion with doctors in my family, there's a good chance that he is getting some form of aggressive chemotherapy for any of several possible reasons and the veins in hands have collapsed so they've gone to using one on his back or neck. That can cause ezcema, which would be treated with the corticosteroid cream they listed.

arne link's avatar

Dear Lord, hear our prayer. Send your man to his final resting place - Hell.

Doc Blase''s avatar

Polonium-210 enemas.

2Cats2Furious's avatar

A “preventative skin treatment”? What does that even mean?!

Gina's avatar

something like a preventive war

DJ Headthrob's avatar

Donny's neck thing (could it be leprosy? an inflamed boil? an infected hickey?) who knows/ He's like Chaucer's Summoner, who was rotting from the INSIDE. Or maybe his Cook, who sported a suspicious "mormal"--Middle English for "pox" or "The Frenchmen's Disease")?

Mwfeiger's avatar

My vote is that it's Shingles. If so, he deserves that pain.

KBinPNW's avatar

My laughter gizmo thingie in my brain is broken by the constant stream of unimaginable horror coming from this administration and the people who support it.. I don’t know if it will ever be fixed.

Carl Babcock's avatar

I've always had an issue with laughing in inappropriate situations, I think it is a defense mechanism; but I am on overload these days. I could not have dreamed, in my worst nightmare, that we would ever end up in this situation.

Jane's avatar

Well anymore it’s laugh or cry

Carol JLH's avatar

Or sing... potential new Adele release, "Rollin' In the Deep Shit"

Doc Blase''s avatar

Creedence Clearwater Revival could do a remake.

Susan Marleau Whelan's avatar

It's from holy water, from the latest exorcism attempt.

Kristina Jurecic's avatar

Same here. I think it's definitely a defense mechanism.

Lucius's avatar

It can't be fixed. It needs to be burned down and something else built in its place.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Unlike people wanting him to die, I want him to live long enough to experience the humiliation of seeing his "legacy" destroyed from removing his name from buildings to taking down all the tacky gold trim in the Oval Bordello to rebuilding the Rose Garden and East Wing.

Martha Howell's avatar

Yeah, I get it, but the damage done in the meantime...

Carol C's avatar

And as his dementia progressed he would not be sentient enough to notice.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Absolutely right Daniel! Better yet, make him physically put back the rose garden starting with giving him a sledgehammer and make him manually remove the concrete parking lot that he covered it with. And then after he has a heart attack and dies have Eric, Donnie Jr, Kushner, the furniture rapist, nut job secretary of war take over one by one. Those that survive should then be slaves to the families of all soldiers and everyday Americans who were murdered because of Trumps actions and statements.

Justice still will not have been served but it would be a step in the right direction.

Cathy Wray's avatar

Daniel, I want a stroke to incapacitate him, then let him see the destruction of his nasty deeds.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

The important thing is that he is aware that he is a complete and utter failure and will be remembered as such.

RZolu's avatar

👍👍👍👍

Susie's avatar

Fair point. But he should be nowhere near anything or anyone that matters to anyone else while he watches us burn it down. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

A demon absentmindedly walks the halls of the WH, stopping now and again to post some brain defect on his lies antisocial app. He looks around with glee to find his typewriter assistant to check it. He stumbles on hearing the words “Sir, sir” from here, there, and everywhere. They echo with giant reverberations in his head. He makes his way to the special room set up for his thrice daily infusions into his hand of ghastly chemicals attempting to keep him awake and alive. He is edgy, irritated, and belligerent after the infusion. He writes more on lies antisocial. Onward to the Oval where the most evil, unelected, unselected demons among the staff hands him more edicts and a sharpie to scribble his name. He has no idea what they say and doesn’t care. He waves off demon Miller. Types more on his app.

I have been a pacifist my whole life. I don’t step on bugs, I crouch down to watch them. I admire birds flitting about in their daily search for food.

Since 2015 a deep hatred has been growing inside me. It hurts my heart to feel this. I’ve always been a happy, go lucky person and I’m now morose, filled with rage, that we live in this time of supervillains in power. My tum hurts all the time and I don’t get much sleep.

The freaks bringing about and cheering on end times suck. I can’t wait until they are no longer.

Bethie U's avatar

You mean rebuild the EAST wing. That’s the one that was trashed. Who knows, by the time we are purged of this monster the west wing might need it too.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

You are correct and I've edited my comment. But his additions to the West Wing, like his "portrait" of Biden as an autopen is ALSO an abomination.

DebJS's avatar

After watching his "beautiful ballroom presidents have [never] been asking for for 150 years" be imploded and hauled away to the dust heap of history.

Teri Gelini's avatar

good possibility as he has made remarks about changing it too

Doc Blase''s avatar

Nah, it's gotta end like, right away. He's setting the Mideast ablaze. Gawd knows what comes next.

Dave Drell's avatar

Sorry Daniel- I want IMMEDIATE SATISFACTION - get him into a casket asap.

HP's avatar

Well, that would be nice too…but not if it means it will take longer to be rid of him.

Teri Gelini's avatar

Absolutely and he needs to do it from federal prison with the whole cabinet their with him...

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

I am for convicting and imprisoning every member of this cabinet for which the law and the facts support their prosecution. I'm willing to accept that it may not be 100%. I want justice, not vengeance. Of course I will not shed a tear if Trump dies in prison.

Glynda Neuwirth's avatar

As long as there are golden draperies

consciousegalitarian's avatar

Oddly, those gorgeous golden drapes offer solace to my troubled soul in these most difficult times..../s/

Dave Drell's avatar

and “he saved money”

like what… he got them at DollarTree?

Butch's avatar

I'm going to vote for whichever Democratic candidate for president in 2028 promises to tear down the ballroom on the first day in office.

Joyce's avatar

Wipe out the national debt: sell tickets for the American people to arrive on site with sledgehammers and pickaxes.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Excellent idea, Joyce!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Joyce, we think alike! Make em work. Put them all together and try to get one honest days work from all of them put together— it’s not possible. They don’t know what that is. “What is this work thing?” “Can’t I just pray and have god do it?” “Isn’t that his job?”

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

The only reason to delay doing so would be make it the site of new Nuremberg trials starting with Hegseth, Noem, and Bondi.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Daniel you make a good point! I could be persuaded to go in that direction…and then we could put them to work

Carol Jacobson's avatar

Trump has to be among the first.

DebJS's avatar

Yes! No more of this working "from the bottom up" a la Merrick Garland.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Yes, but that damn Supreme Court "immunity" ruling will make it harder.

Charles Austin's avatar

Blow it up. (Better visual😂😂)

Frank Nuts's avatar

And give them front row seats — “all of you step over there, a little more to the left, that’s it, right next to the concrete”.

“Now, on the count of three give us your best pouty face”

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

I think they should pass a bill the first day they take over allocating the money for the teardown.

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

The site should remain a huge gaping hole like his soul.

Steve in SoCal's avatar

Or maybe donate it to Antifa for their headquarters building 🤣🤣

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Things that happened while you were writing this: The Dow dropped 1,000 points. Perhaps today would’ve been a better day to depose Pam Bondi.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Touché Stephanie!

Ann Panda's avatar

Every day has become a constant panic attack for me.

Eva's avatar

I agree. I woke up from a weird dream last might and couldn’t get back to sleep worrying about EMPs and my daughter who lives alone 100 miles away and and and…and I really wish the US wasn’t as stupid as it is to have elected this lying, grifting, moron and his band of fools .

I feel slightly better for having said that

Mary Hall's avatar

We didn't elect him -- he and Eloon stole the election. I will go to my grave believing that.

RZolu's avatar

Mary Hall I’m with you 💯!!!

Doc Blase''s avatar

Nope. We can't adopt Blue-anon bullshit when we lose and it's all fair when we win. That's how the Q-loons play it.

Michael Johnson's avatar

I did too. Had a nightmare, which is rare, at 2:45 AM, and could not fall back asleep - also rare these days. Don't recall the dream, but it must be related to the fact tRump/hegseth have the nuclear codes, etc.

My cat reacted to my nightmare and crawled into bed with me - a steadfast pal. But guess I must have let out a yelp or two.

the grift, corruption & incompetence are overwhelming, no doubt. wish a lot, including that we were not forced into this very stupid timeline, and have to process all the insanity every day while just trying to live our lives, get by.

Doc Blase''s avatar

Mine was fretting over attracting camels with bait made of a bundle of "AA" batteries wrapped inside a cluster of bananas.

That was on Sunday,

¯\_㋡_/¯

Frank Nuts's avatar

You’re right Eva. Truth makes us all feel a little better.

Spread truth not lies.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I could become a real alcoholic in all this. JFC!!!

Jodi Richard's avatar

I go out into the wilderness with my dogs, every day. I also microdose 🍄 to deal with all of this fucking shit. Thank goodness for this community or I would be on the floor curled in a ball, crying, and swearing uncontrollably. The stupid has to stop soon…how is that 🍊💩👜 still alive?

Cathy Wray's avatar

I usually say prayers. During the night I decided that there is no god if he could let all this evil happen. I was thinking about the fact that little immigrant girls who got raped as they were trying to get to the U.S and now are pregnant are being sent to a concentration camp in Texas, where ALL abortions are banned. So Texas and all republican politicians are responsible for forcing a little girl to grow a baby and give birth, which is really dangerous for little girls. Fuck this shit. I hate goddamn republicans.

Jodi Richard's avatar

Same!! Hate them all.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Jodi, that’s the question that vexes us all. Where is god when you really need him? Apparently he “isn’t”. If there was a god he wouldn’t let this happen. Or perhaps he resides in another location.

Cyndi's avatar

Are you positive that he is? He's sure not running the show.

arne link's avatar

I understand. I indulge in mindless eating. My pants are getting tight so maybe drinking is the better choice?

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I run around my house without my pants screaming like a banshee nowadays.

Carol JLH's avatar

Running naked thru the woods is a time-honored stress reliever. It works better in the country than the city, tho.

DebJS's avatar

but afterwards don't forget to check every inch of your skin for ticks - or else you could live a different kind of torture....

arne link's avatar

Oh, Lord. I can't unsee that.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Clearly the healthiest option.

mary's avatar

Why not both?

Donna Marie's avatar

I vape while exercising Namaste MFers

Jane's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

Frank Nuts's avatar

Come on Arnie, drinking does it too (unless it’s just water)

Doc Blase''s avatar

I've lost my appetite. It's a weight loss therapy for me.

Mingo's avatar

That's the only industry that won't lose money in all this mayhem. Although the Canadians have been doing a bang-up job bankrupting Kentucky distilleries.

Frank Nuts's avatar

The problem with Trump, Mingo, is that he leaves no stone unturned…and if he can’t turn it he smashes it. He kills/destroys everything he touches.

It’s amazing that after 50 years of destroying everything he touches that he has actually built a bigger following.

My faith in humanity has really taken a hit

Mary Hall's avatar

ETTD (For those in the back -- Everything T💩p Touches Dies)

Jodi Richard's avatar

Then for the love of all things holy and unholy, can the motherfucker touch himself and end this already?

Doc Blase''s avatar

I wish Total Wine were publicly traded.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Me, too. Fortunately, my boyfriend has guilted me into remaining sober.

Steve in SoCal's avatar

Sobriety is a fine thing, taken in moderation

DebJS's avatar

At least you have a boyfriend.

Linda Fairchild's avatar

Sipping wine while making dinner and waiting for the lunar eclipse helped. I remember being in British Columbia the morning after the election. My friend said don't sugar coat this. It's going to get really bad. I think that you were in Alaska!

Mary Hall's avatar

I was with my energy healer friend the night we learned T💩p "won" in 2016. I actually threw up just thinking about him being my USCG son's commander, something I hadn't done in decades. My friend checked in with her higher contacts and told me it would be a shitshow but ultimately, would help humanity to make progress much quicker. Maybe she's right because if T💩p wasn't where he is we probably wouldn't even be thinking about the Epstein Files, which let us see into that Pandora's Box of Evil. As more is revealed, I believe we will learn that all of this horrible shit is connected -- drugs, money laundering, sex slaves, kidnapping, murder, treason, etc., etc., etc.

Doc Blase''s avatar

So there is an upside to the lunacy.

Christine Zepka's avatar

On my way…🍸🥴

Skepticat's avatar

I've never had hypertension, but my BP is rocketing like Chump's ego.

Frank Nuts's avatar

That may be true Skepticat, but you’ll never catch up to his ego. He’s the G.O.A.T. Of egos.

Skepticat's avatar

That's sadly, painfully, and frighteningly true. Dammit.

Carl Babcock's avatar

Yeah. Makes me wish I hadn't quit smoking

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lm8fYf53SMg

Cheri Collins's avatar

I love that scene - and now it’s truly relevant.

George in Atlanta's avatar

Damn you, you beat me to it!

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Well, I am a professional film critic. :)

George in Atlanta's avatar

Arrrgh. I am out-classed.

arne link's avatar

Ok, that made me laugh. I've never had the habit but sometimes I think of taking it up, just for the relief.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Ann, I hate to say but I’m right behind you. They’re trying to make Armageddon come true and they really mean it this time.

Mad Men. I guess it’s a thing

Gordon Berry's avatar

Laugh it off! he's dying...

arne link's avatar

Ok, fine. It is just taking too long, and he will nuke someone before he goes. He wants to take as many souls with him as he can.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Two for Tuesday:

Decent people abhor

This illegal immoral war

A petroleum grab

A distraction confab

That's what drumpf wants it for

Piss drunk Pete

Head full o' meat

Gets a thrill

From every kill

and illegal feat

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Frank Nuts's avatar

Good poem H12th Doc. I dig it

Dave Drell's avatar

Short but sweet- it can’t be beat!

Susan Niemann's avatar

"nobody should classify this as a war. is it combat operations.”

I truly despise these idiots. 🤦‍♀️

Boebert thinks she's smart and Hillary owned her. STOP VOTING FOR THESE LUNATICS!

Serious question: What other world leaders have been as mentally deranged as the felon?

Mary Hall's avatar

I have always thought of T💩p as the modern-day Caligula. If you've never seen the movie -- don't -- it is very disturbing and at this point too fking close to home.

Charles Austin's avatar

Oh....Hitler, Pol Pot, Chalchesque

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

In his final years, after multiple strokes, Stalin was also massively unhinged. The good news is that a hilarious movie was made about his death.

Mary Greenwald's avatar

4th District in Colorado is Boebert Country. Shooting Guns and Massaging Dick is their entertainment.

Susan Niemann's avatar

😂😂. I’m in line at the pharmacy and laughed so hard I think I scared people!

Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Eva's avatar

Probably the guy they killed, and Trump’s partner in war crimes Netanyahu

Frank Nuts's avatar

Vlad the Impaler? Just guessing

Susan Niemann's avatar

After all these great suggestions, maybe the question should have been: Have we ever had a decent, SANE leader? 😂😂

Dave Drell's avatar

Words mean nothing to Republitards

- “combat operation” is WAR -

ya more-on!

Steve in SoCal's avatar

I'd say Idi Amin comes close

What Fresh Hell Is This?'s avatar

Thank you, Jeff, for always transcribing your videos because I refuse to listen to these eejits. 🙄

arne link's avatar

Amen. I truly appreciate Jeff's kindness in doing that for us. Bless his heart for listening so that we don't have to.

Joyce's avatar

Handy also took a photo during the closed-door testimony and released it, and now she's having a fit because she got in trouble for it. Her defense is that secretly taking and distributing a photo during a closed-door hearing is only against the rules and so she could do it.

Could someone just throw a bucket of water on her so she'd melt already?

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Boebert is frozen at 14, about the age she was when she dropped out of school and started reproducing. Her interrogation of Hillary was totally "babysitter on gummies."

Susie's avatar

Ahahahahahhahahaha!!! Babysitter. On gummies!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Charles Austin's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Frank Nuts's avatar

Joyce, it might work. Worth a try. Anybody got a bucket because I’m game

SethTriggs's avatar

There's nobody at the wheel. Just nobody. We're being led—if that—by Herr Miller and Three Shirts to the Wind Bannon.

It's amazing what you can do when you're protected by Murc's Law.

Oh wow I hope the Internet clout gathered from claiming the pricktator being anti-war is still safe!

Joyce's avatar

President Miller is a psychopathic sadist who is having a grand time persecuting immigrants and any citizen who defends them; Three Shirts long ago announced that he wanted to burn it all down, because he's just a nihilist.

Lucius's avatar

I heard that Internet clout is tied to prediction markets and Bitcoin. Big if true.

Charles Austin's avatar

Thiel has a wagering site that runs on Crypto. Damn right it's big!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Seth, as you know, nothing is safe as long as Trump is on the loose.

I agree with you that Trump appears as if there’s nobody at the wheel.

He looks so spacey (all the time but especially since this Iran war started) that I fear someone IS at the wheel—someone of a Manchurian persuasion. Just look at him. He looks like a hypnotized zombie, especially lately.

Look, they took out Robert Kennedy that way (and god knows how many other people).

Maybe it could be used to start an Armageddon

There’s enough kooky culty Christians in power to make it happen. All the stars have aligned:

(1) psychopath Trump, the anti-

Christ, gets the ball rolling

(2) feckless crazy republicans

Control the house and senate

(3) serial killer(and equally crazy

Netanyahoo is in power

As an aside, can’t you see Netanyahoo strapped to a nuclear bomb ala Slim Pickens in Dr Strangelove yelling “YAHOO!” as he’s dropped from a B-52 over Tehran?

Scratch that—he’s too much of a self absorbed narcissist to be a suicide bomber. He’d get somebody else to do it.

(4) Armageddon starts in the Middle East right?

But…it’s ok…

We’ll meet again

Don’t know where

Don’t know when…

Will's avatar
Mar 3Edited

“word-adjacent noises” almost had me spray my coffee across the room.

Jeff, I nominate you to write the screenplay if we survive all of this. Action comedy of some sort.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Updated “Idiocracy”.

kathiallyson's avatar

Will: good thing it was "almost" or we would have had a coffee spitting duel. I wasn't prepared to burst out laughing quite so early in Jeff's piece. He is the prince of the well-turned sarcastic phrase, but "word-adjacent noises" was king.

Christine Zepka's avatar

I drink tea, but same. 🫖

Frank Nuts's avatar

Oh yes Will — Please let it happen!

RelentlessJo's avatar

The worst part in this absurdist reality is, not to do a tRump and exaggerate, but literally billions of people on this planet are affected and manipulated by a handful of deranged psychopaths. Just another rhyme we have to rewrite…

Mary Hall's avatar

And the beat goes on.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Jo you are (unfortunately) so right!

Dave Drell's avatar

Who can doubt that one of these wackos would start a nuclear war? We all live on a knife edge…. waiting for some mistake to happen; or a madman seeking revenge to lose his rational thought and hurl a missile or two!

Bombs away!

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

The douche thinks it's cool to drop bombs

Creating his own Vietnam

Worse than R. Nixon

His crowd's putting dicks in

And blowing them to kingdom come.

But the Epstein stuff is still there

And it's worse than his rancid fake hair

And his stanky-ass smell

Is the first realm of hell

I can't take it, it's too much to bear.

Susie's avatar

Very punch-to-the-gut limerick today. Well done. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Jane's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

Frank Nuts's avatar

Very artful (and true) Frosty!

Runfastandwin's avatar

You can't fight in here! This is the War Room!

arne link's avatar

Can't these pitiful men get an erection without someone dying? Jeebus! Buy a pill, you meatsacks.

Susie's avatar
Mar 3Edited

Meatsack is so apt. And so beautifully simple. 🤣👏🏻🤣👏🏻🤣

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Frank Nuts's avatar

Made me laugh Arnie. Shame on you

Jean Wyman's avatar

As always, I love the post, but including quotes from both Stripes and Dr. Strangelove in one day brings me a special kind of joy.