yesterday was a pretty fucking good day all around
let's celebrate 5 very good things that happened on Tuesday
Trump in court wasn’t the only good thing that happened yesterday. Tuesday was a metric fuck-ton of good news. let me count the ways.
1. Citizen Trump gets treated like the common criminal he is
no more pomp and circumstance for this rotting old gasbag. no deference. no red carpet. private citizen Donald Trump had to sit in a cramped, dingy courtroom like any common criminal, sulking and scowling while 34 felony charges were read out loud.
mad props to the guy who let the door swing shut on Donny’s big stupid pumpkin face. is a Congressional Medal of Honor too much to ask?
and when you’re a private citizen, no one gives a fuck about your dumb unofficial pretend motorcade.
2. Congresswoman Sporkfoot gets run the fuck out of town
while Trump was getting his come-uppance, semi-professional party clown Marjorie Three Toes Greene made good on her threat to make a complete ass of herself.
Marge showed up at a lower Manhattan street corner, bleated incoherently into a faulty megaphone and was immediately drowned out by a larger crowd of counter-protesters. this went on for about three minutes, a which point Her Sporkness gave up, got back in her rented car and high-tailed it out of town.
sad.
also, this happened:
so, all around, a good day in New York.
3. Appeals Court tells Mark Meadows to go shit in his hat
tough shit, Mark. go testify.
The D.C. Circuit Court of Appeals sided with the Department of Justice Tuesday in ordering testimony from former chief of staff Mark Meadows and other top Trump White House staffers in the DOJ’s Jan. 6 investigation.
4. Janet Protasiewicz gets elected to the Wisconsin State Supreme Court
this one is huge, folks. this tips the balance of the Wisconsin Supreme Court to the left, which is very good news regarding pending cases on abortion and voter supression and redistricting.
and this is the fuckface she defeated. check out this graceless fucking sore loser.
5. Brandon Johnson is elected Mayor of Chicago
and finally, a good guy who was virtually unknown came out of nowhere to defeat yet another wingnut shithead.
so there you have it, from start to finish it was a very good day. we don’t get a lot of them, so let’s all savor the moment and then let’s get back to fighting the good fight.
folks, a word on a different subject before I let you go: we’re doing some quarterly fundraising at my other venture, The Smirking Chimp. I’m leery of even mentioning it because if you’re one of the people paying to support my own writing here, you’re already doing god’s work and you’re already doing more than enough to help out. but if you’ve got five dollars that you absolutely wouldn’t miss and you do feel like supporting the Chimp, well, that just makes you twice the hero. the donation link is here, or you can go straight to paypal if you need no further convincing. and if you don’t care to donate, that’s totally cool, too, and we will not speak of this again. in fact, we never had this conversation. thanks for listening and that’s it from me for now.
This is the ONLY way I want to read the news from now on!! Omg, Jeff this is a MASTERPIECE!! 🤣
I bet the fat oaf has never before had to open his own door.