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User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in Shit That Happened While I Was Writing This Shitβ€”

I don't have one for today! there were no news alerts on my phone when I checked it after posting. so tell me, what am I missing?

Wendy The Druid πŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈπŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸŒˆ's avatar

Wait, jeff, really?

Because, I am just gonna tell you

The most expensive military in human goddamn history just paused its own bombing campaign because β€” no bullshit β€” it ran out of the interceptors it needs to catch what Iran throws back, having flung the rest at the Houthis and shipped a pile to Ukraine. the arsenal's empty. We have a cuck'ed military ass lot that can't get it up hard enough to do anythning. Who is running this glorious clusterfuck? Pete Hegseth, a man his own chickenshit party admits couldn't get reconfirmed today, who spent last week hawking testosterone quizzes to the troops while sitting on the casualty count.

https://thistleandmoss.com/p/what-survives-the-morning-point-at-the-record-then-turn-towards-the-fucking-light

HI2thDoc's avatar

Our arsenal is waning

The Treasury is draining

The facts Hegseth is hiding

By blaming it on Biden

This regime is always feigning

BC's avatar

Hegseth has been playing war like a child would. Neither have any idea what they're doing. It gets dangerous when the manchild in charge of our Pentagon fires everyone with knowledge and experience, and thinks testerone levels is something he needs to worry about in our military. He also doesn't want woman or POC in the military. What the f**k?? Good job making us less safe than ever!

Irascible Ink's avatar

I can only assume a neighborhood girl used her Barbie to beat the shit out of Pete's G.I. Joe and broke his Kung Fu grip, and the little dweeb never got over it.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Party boy Pete

Thinks war is so neat

Besides ethanol swilling

He loves bombing and killing

Everyone to him is just meat

Cathy Wray's avatar

Hl2th, women and girls are just meat to this mal administration.

Martha Howell's avatar

How much do you want to bet that Hegseth has told his commanders that he only wants to hear positive feedback, he got rid of the negative commanders, now just tell me the good news? We went from Eisenhower writing up a letter admitting failure on D Day eve, just in case, to this peacock with a bird brain. All he had to do was talk to our ally in Ukraine about modern drone warfare, but he's too testosterone-y to take advice, and too stupid to learn anything. They're just playing with their GI Joe sets, not a care or a strategy in sight.

Kay-El's avatar

This is a poorly made reboot of War Games starring Pete Kegsbreath with a D-list cast.

Bob's avatar

Compared to what’s been waisted, what we sent to Ukraine was a few drops. But now, we sell them to NATO allies, who supply them to Ukraine because Donny thinks this coy little trick will impress Putin. It’s all worse than anyone imagined. Speaking of worse, Bibi is all butt hurt because people are calling him a war criminal. Well, Mr. Prime Minister of Israel and illegally seized land, if you weren’t committing war crimes, that would not happen.

Bob Bowden's avatar

Jeff, the only thing you missed in your post was to quote the late great George Carlin in a caption below the AI rendering of Orange Shitler with a cigar in his mouth: β€œSometimes a cigar is just a cigar… and sometimes it’s A BIG BROWN DICK”

Mike Hammer's avatar

He proved he’s interested in the latter by fellating the mic at the Republican National Convention.

Denise Donaldson's avatar

OK, this is a much better version than my similarly-minded post. BRAVO!

Tess's avatar

same shit different day???

Mike Hammer's avatar

Only if you’re talking about the Reflecting Pool turned septic tank.

Gloria J. Maloney's avatar

Does his "stalker-diaper-nurse" examine his stool every day as they did for the Emperor of China?

Susan Niemann's avatar

Ew. 🀒🀒🀒

arne link's avatar

If she's in charge of changing him then, yes.

Gloria J. Maloney's avatar

I hope they pay her well.

Leu2500's avatar

I hope we, the US taxpayers, don't.

Martha Howell's avatar

Putin will probably put her in the Duma when her mission is complete.

Julia Grey's avatar

Probably has Pull-ups, but no doubt needs help getting a clean wipe.

Bob's avatar

Or in the movie β€œThe Madness of King George?”

Kathleen Weber's avatar

πŸ’πŸ’πŸ’πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ’πŸ’πŸ’β€ΌοΈβ€ΌοΈβ€ΌοΈ '

Lucian Truscott IV gave a big shout out to Jeff yesterday in his substack:

"Jeff Tiedrich, who writes a very funny Substack called β€œeveryone is entitled to my own opinion,” which you should be reading daily not only for its humor, but for its attitude, has had a recurring theme in his column, that the first reporter who stands up and asks Trump β€œwhat the fuck is wrong with you,” should receive what Tiedrich calls a β€œlifetime Pulitzer.”

One of you, just one, should stand up in the White House press room the next time Trump shows his pancake-plastered face down there and ask Tiedrich’s question: what the fuck is wrong with you?"

https://luciantruscott.substack.com/p/bended-knees-on-the-potomac-white

BTW, I read Lucian's substack almost every day. It generally comes out in the evening.

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

and everyone should be reading Lucian. he's a West Point graduate who can explain Piss Drunk Pete's fuckery better than anyone else I know

Mary Hall's avatar

Not only that but Lucian is the six-time great grandson of President Thomas Jefferson, a gifted writer, and my friend’s brother.

Bonnie Council's avatar

He's now on my list. 😊

Susan Niemann's avatar

Indeed. Lucian is smart as hell!

Robin D's avatar

I've been following him.for over a year. Love him. He is fascinating. Thomas Jefferson was his six-great-grandfather. Wrote for the Village Voice, Rolling Stone, his novel "Dress Gray", comes from a storied military family. Great writer. Wicked sense of humor. One of my favorite substacks.

Pat Ebervein's avatar

Every time I hear him tell a reporter that they’re stupid for asking a particular question, I’m wondering why they’re not poking back with β€œWhat’s even stupider is not being able to answer a question that is highly relevant to the current situation and also as to whether or not you actually know what you’re doing. Just sayin’!”

john augustine's avatar

Lucien has also written for hollywood and tv I believe

Robin D's avatar

His book Dress Gray was made into a mini-series and was up for Emmys years ago.

john augustine's avatar

so do I....he is great

Marlene Lerner-Bigley (CA)'s avatar

Yes, Lucian and Jeff make a great team. I read both daily.

Tess's avatar

The β€œstalker-slash-diaper-nurse” must be getting paid some big bucks. These are the most deranged posts-and he is the fucking president of the United States?!!!! Give me a fucking break…come on Congress….grow a pair and remember who you represent! MY GOD! Disgusting…. but thanks for the hat pics on Claudia…such good taste! ❀️

Joyce's avatar

I have a strong feeling that the personal Harpy is paid very little or even nothing at all: she's so disturbed that she'd absolutely work for free, considering his diapers to be worth more than a salary. Maybe she should pay him for the privilege.

Mary Hall's avatar

I read that TπŸ’©p approved something that allowed Stalker Diaper Nurse to treat her bone cancer and now she is completely devoted to him. Too bad for the rest of us that TπŸ’©p has killed.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I heard he's using washable diapers now to do his part for the economy. Harp likes washing them because...

rlritt's avatar

Maybe she has his credit card.

Robin D's avatar

🎯. πŸ’―

HI2thDoc's avatar

Her own brother is imploring

The unfathomably adoring

Shining-eyed Harp

That her stalkerish LARP

Will exceed any reputation restoring

Robin D's avatar

She is a fucking disturbed whackjob. A real " bunny boiling" Fatal Attraction. When he dies (soon I hope) she will be the grieving widow. She loves him. Would do it for free. Thinks he saved her from a rare cancer. She's also a holy-rolling evangelical whose brother has come out and said she's nuts. Need i go on?

Susan Niemann's avatar

Certifiable. You've nailed it.

Susan Niemann's avatar

Honestly. He's mad as hell. That they are allowing this is astounding. It makes me sick.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Yes, Susan. Nightmares and headaches here.

Leu2500's avatar

I'm assuming she's a federal employee. which means her pay is capped at ~$250K. But iirc the 1st term correctly, the felon had aides moonlighting for his PACs or some other entities (which is unethical if not illegal) so they got paid more.

Jan Moon's avatar

Maybe I missed it but, does she have a title? Besides Batshit Diaper unloader.

Kim Nesvig's avatar

There’s a very strong probability that Natalie the Nurse is drawing upon an incessant stream of memes created by Russian trolls. It’s Putin’s ongoing gift to Donald.

Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

I think you hit the nail on the head, Kim! Putin is behind it all.

HI2thDoc's avatar

I like presidents who aren't demented sexual predator crooks that use their time to endlessly shitpost lies and ludicrous AI confabulations.

Mary Greenwald's avatar

Stephen Miller and Russell Vought are super happy Trump gets crazier every day. Then we moan and gripe about Trump and they get to screw America without a peep from the media. Trump's handlers are all-in on bat-shit crazy Trump.

rlritt's avatar

Miller and Vought run him. He was the dupe they picked to run cover for them while they tore everything down.

Cathy Wray's avatar

rlritt, I agree!!

Robin D's avatar

πŸŽ―πŸ’―

Bob's avatar

They both should be brought to the bar at The Hague and prosecuted for war crimes, crimes against humanity and being two of the biggest assholes ever. Jack Smith should prosecute.

Robin D's avatar

THIS!!! EXACTLY! They are his puppet masters who love all this distraction so people don't realize what they are doing in the background. I really don't think people understand the danger we are in. From him yes...but they are pulling the strings. This is exactly what Elon and the tech bros bought with money...knowingly! But none of them could have been elected dog catcher. They needed this demented carnival barker. He brought them in like a Trojan Horse. I havve never hated people more in my life. Until they get rid of not only Trump, but the rest of this poison, wd will never recover. Frankly, I am 70. I won't live long enkugh to see how this movie ends. It will take way over a generation, and in the interim he has changed fhe world order, destroyed everything he can get his hands on, and I am not feeling confident in anyway, shape or form.about the future.

Joyce's avatar

The only logical explanation: both Donnie Demento and his personal Harpy believe that Kaitlin Collins is THISCLOSE to winning the "what the fuck is wrong with you?" lifetime Pulitzer.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I'm waiting for her to pull out a can of whoop ass.

HI2thDoc's avatar

If George Washington were here today, he would kick drumpf's treasonous, dictatorial ass all the way down Pennsylvania Avenue

Stephen Brady's avatar

Forgive the image, but he should be stripped naked and thrashed through the streets of the Capitol.

Natalia Lincoln's avatar

With a nun in grey clanging a bell and growling β€œShame” every half a minute or so.

Susan Niemann's avatar

What a great scene that was. πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

Bob's avatar

Tarred and feathered.

Stephen Brady's avatar

After he is flogged.

Larry Caringer's avatar

That absolutely stupid AI slop that some say shows the yellow turd ball β€œsaving” George Washington? I think it’s the other way around…that’s a picture of George Washington trying to pull President Numbnutz off the cliff to save humanity.

Stephen Brady's avatar

And in that slop, Lincoln is missing from Mt. Rushmore.

Peter's avatar

Remind me again about the way Sleepy Joe pissed away our weapons stockpiles on wars for ego and to swing a bigger dick than Obama? Right, you can't. Or is that asshole Waltz referring to the weapons Biden sold to Ukraine to defend themselves against Trump's owner Putin? Jesus Christ on a Camel, these fucks have been in office for almost two years. They can't blame Biden for all of their fuckups forever no matter how hard they try. No one buys it but the MAGA cult.

bruce somers's avatar

They will try, it's Biden Derangement Syndrome.

Gary Moeller's avatar

This fucking lunatic in charge of our country ? What a fucking nightmare!

Cheryl Ramette's avatar

Wow, it's just ... impossible for my brain to accept all this is really happening in real life ... and yet I know it's true.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

Here's Trump's achievement: Ego the size of the continent squashed all the white people after he had deported all the brown people. Boo hah!

The next time he's giving a speech at Mount Rushmore, the four dead presidents will stand up, turn around, drop their shorts and crap on him in unison.

Natalia Lincoln's avatar

Resulting in Mount Flushmore.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

'‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

I wish with all my heart that Tate gets put in the general population in his prison. Let's see what he complains about then.

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Make him parade around in those tight capris, purple silk blouse, and stinky loafers. He'd find out what it felt like to be a sex slave in his harem.

Bob's avatar

His cellmate, Bruno, will become reeeeeal close friends.

Lisa Bieber's avatar

If you think Pedobent Trump and Fake Ivanka are sniffing too many Sharpies while posting AI slop, raise your hand. Wonderful pictures of Claudia, as usual. She aged beautifully. I'm jealous!

Bonnie Council's avatar

Hand up. What's highly suspicious is how they come up with so many of these so quickly. Those pictures take a bit of work, I would think. But they managed to post 7 of them in just under 2 hours. The one of the strike on Kharg & the oil tanker are only 1 minute apart. Who's creating these absurdities for him???

arne link's avatar

Russian trolls, probably. Trump has worked for Putin for many years.

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Xi Jinping must be face-palming and thinking: "Ask me again why we want to be the world's number 1 superpower...."

Bob's avatar

Steve Cheung and his merry band of comms pranksters and shit kazoos.

Orangeshitstain's avatar

Sorry, but every time I see Kristen Welker now I have that image of her yukking it up with Stephen Miller at the correspondents dinner. Legacy media can go to hell.

Cathy Wray's avatar

Orange, really? That's awful!!!

Chicky Mama's avatar

Yes! To both statements!