217 Comments
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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

folks, every now and then we get a week where there's very little funny and way too much horrible, and this was one of those weeks

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Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

I really can’t express to you how much appreciate you. It’s not just the daily gems you write. It’s also the community you’ve created among your readers. This is one of the few places I feel safe speaking my mind without mincing any words.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

Same here…I’ve met truly wonderful people here. 🥰

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Suzeebee's avatar

Agree

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Susan Niemann's avatar

As always, you do such a fine job with what you're given.

You must have been a copywriter in the ad biz. Always challenging.

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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I was an art director. Ms Spouse was a copywriter.

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FTrump And FPutin Too's avatar

Your daily comment is a work of art, that’s what makes it so special! I thought that was spray paint not mace the first eleventy times I watched it. And I want that hat to confuse the magats with truth. The truth is out there, and it’s sharpened here. Thank you, again. A good day to you and Mrs Spouse!

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Susan Niemann's avatar

The creative runs deep in the Tiedrich household, then. 👏👏👏

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Jerrold Marsh's avatar

But you have to admit that Monday's segment was hilarious. Shame the rest of the week had to be so shitty.

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HI2thDoc's avatar

I really thought it was referring to self appointed genitalia inspector Nancy Mace

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Cheri Collins's avatar

I hoped it was, anyway! That would have been hilarious.

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Cheryl ODonnell's avatar

That should be her lifetime title.

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Tim Singer's avatar

You always find a way to help us smile through the shit storm. Thank you for covering the nonsense.

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TCinDC's avatar

But you always wrap up this bad shit in complete absurdity and insult the hell out of these morons in your unique way, that makes me laugh.

I'm sitting in an ER reception area and you had me LOL—not the usual behavior for someone here. I needed this. Thank you!!

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Jan Moon's avatar

I finally got online after finding out my daughter's wedding has been called off. Typical for this week. So, Jeff, I just want you to know that I was able to laugh (hysterically at times) at a couple of your comments. Thank you. "Brenden seems nice." And the oral diarrhea pouring out of Pres. Nutjob's pie-hole I could almost laugh at, but not quite. But I didn't cry. And what the fuck is wrong with Christian Nationalists? Are they really human?

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James Starr's avatar

for those American televangelists, their racism and ignorance is astronomical in scope and goes beyond the bend of space.

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Lynn Van Haren's avatar

I was thinking that as I read your column. Nothing funny about this week’s events

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Maybe not, but we at least got to see another example or two or maybe even three of how republicans never think about or understand consequences.

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Clarke Shaw's avatar

Lots of stupid this week. Starting with Kash Patel

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J.R.'s avatar

Other than the so called pastor I laughed my ass off. What else are we going to do!

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Ellis Weiner's avatar

Yes, but "they fell into an airspace" is tip-top.

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arne link's avatar

That was particularly idiotic. The peedo in chief really does have dementia and very little interest in America. I can't help but wonder how much he's grifting from the little Versailles ballroom. Also, the Epstein files must be released.

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Cheri Collins's avatar

I really admire how well you keep it together in the face of the never ending bullshit firehouse of these times. You keep the rest of us (relatively) sane. Thank you so much, my friend! Take very good care of yourself! ❤️

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SethTriggs's avatar

Still the way the news was delivered was funny and that's something. It's *something.*

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kdsherpa's avatar

I thought you did some good funny.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

"I’ve got Karl Marx on the phone. he says he’s got a cool new hat that he wants to send you." That Image made me spit coffee...😂😂😂 SO GOOD!

Katie Britt would serve us all if she would make us all a sandwich. How in the hell did this woman get elec... oh never mind.

Brenden Dilly? Thankfully I've never heard of this simple minded lunatic.

Have a calm weekend, all you fine people. ✌️

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Pere Ubu's avatar

I find it hilarious he couldn't come up with a better name than "The Dilly Show"

I guess it's "ha ha just like 'The Daily Show'" but I don't remember TDS being just Jon Stewart sitting in a dark studio yelling bigoted shit

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Christine Zepka's avatar

And all that oink (oops), pink!! I found that to be interesting. 🤔

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Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

Thanks, Susan. You too! We all desperately need a calm weekend for a change. I came into the comments to mention the Karl Marx bit, so thank you for mentioning it already. Funniest bit today, Jeff! Thanks.

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Kati Kertesz's avatar

Britt: gerrymandering. That’s how we got all the maga idiots in Congress.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

Just appalling... the cheating, lying. If they had to win an election fairly, they couldnt do it.

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Sharon C Storm's avatar

You too, Susan! 💙

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Donald Lipkis's avatar

Katie Britt has been serving us a shit sandwich for a long time.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

😂😂😂

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Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

A ham sandwich from Katie for all of us. LOL, Susan!

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

My husband makes one for me almost every day. I guarantee they are better than hers.

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cablecargal's avatar

My husband's a retired chef. He'll make me anything I want and I still eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for dinner sometimes.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Yes, if I have to do something for myself, it's peanut butter and jelly.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

😂😂 Katie is pretty freaky. UGH.

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Kaja Sommer's avatar

Karl Marx on the phone was a good one!🤓

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Susan Niemann's avatar

🤣🤣✌️

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arne link's avatar

I suppose that a person with a name like Brenden Dilly was destined to be an idiot. I'm sure he was bullied as a child.

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meryl selig's avatar

Gotta say: we have lots of coffee-spitters in this community 😂

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Susan Niemann's avatar

For sure...one minute you're casually enjoying that blueberry muffin, the next you choke on your coffee. 🤣🤣

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meryl selig's avatar

Maybe not safe to read Jeff while eating or drinking!!

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Susan Niemann's avatar

Absolutely! 😄

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Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

The MAGA cult went certifiably crazy this week—not that they weren’t crazy before—but this week I saw a really scary shift in them, and I’m not even talking about the politicians. I’m referring to private citizens, some of whom live right here in my neighborhood. The vitriol and the threats I was reading ;when they thought the killer was a “leftist wing nut” reached another level. And of course, now that we know, he was a white, Christian male from a conservative family, we hear crickets. No retraction, no apologies.,.nada! It’s the first time that I actually feel unsafe speaking my mind.

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michellefromchicago's avatar

Perfectly understandable. The upside is that the vast majority of diehard Trump supporters are just as cowardly and full of crap as their heathen idol

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Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Thank you. I needed this reminder. 🥰

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michellefromchicago's avatar

You’re welcome! It’s easy to forget this point because Maga people are so noisy and relentless

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Grace Kennedy's avatar

We hear the same reaction they had to Melissa Hortman’s murder by one of theirs.

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🌷IntheHalloftheMtnKing's avatar

It's wild they tried to get ahead of the news cycle with their "it's the left" claims.

I wish we didn't have a president that tried to divide us all so much.

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Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

He’s way past the trying stage. He has succeeded BIGLY!

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arne link's avatar

He's done Putin's work for many years. Now Putin is ghosting him and he's oh so sad. Can you die of a broken heart?

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Mark Slattery's avatar

To summarize: Kirk's assassination was a horrible act by a horrible person against another horrible person.

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Judy Player's avatar

But let's talk about the Epstein files!

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Susan P Thatcher's avatar

Charlie Kirk would have wanted that. I mean it.

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Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Personally I want proof, ballistics and forensics that his rifle was the one.

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Dave Drell's avatar

Good one JT - I was thinking a lot of the Donny Dachau character and here’s what i came up with:

1. He’s as useless as a pimple on a boar’s ass.

2.When he enters a room, he’s about as welcome as a bean fart on a crowded elevator.

3. 99% of the people in the world would rather listen to a crying baby for 12 hours than to him blabber on for 5 minutes…the other 1% are deaf.

4. As a human being, he is so cold & heartless, that if launched into the sun, its fire would be extinguished in 10 minutes.

5. When asked of life’s disappointments, the most frequent response was that his father didn’t wear a condom.

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Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

Excellent, Dave!

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Dave Drell's avatar

You never know what the brain comes up with at one AM.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

I'm with Dana Jae. This is a great collection of thoughts. It belongs on a poster.

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Jane's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

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Linda McCaughey's avatar

"they fell into an airspace". Is that like "throwing something 'away' "? The concept eludes me. Is there a tear or portal or whatever in the time-space continuum that disappears things as though they never existed? Why have I never seen this wonderful thing? Enquiring minds want to know!! Think how useful a thing like that would be....we could put all the plastic clogging up the oceans in there, and--POOF!

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Noel's avatar

They came out of the portal that exists in the back of the dryer, where one of every pair of socks goes.

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michellefromchicago's avatar

As I write this, there are three lonely socks sitting on top of my dresser, pining for their mates

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Grace Kennedy's avatar

The “matching socks” thing is SO overrated:)

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Yes, when school kids started wearing unmatching socks, I was relieved.

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Gina's avatar

I buy & wear all identical - orgy, not pairs

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michellefromchicago's avatar

😆

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Major Kong's avatar

Or pining for the fjords.

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michellefromchicago's avatar

I just hope their mates have not passed on!

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Linda McCaughey's avatar

Can we put ocean plastic in there?

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Noel's avatar

Oh, if only!

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Denise Donaldson's avatar

The portal takes socks and gives back lint.

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MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

Can confirm the existence of a tear in the time-space continuum. It’s a black hole that regularly disappears my reading glasses, cigarette lighters, and TV remote control.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Oh, is that where my glasses are? And my husband's remote controls. He has three.

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Pam Humphrey's avatar

Wonder if that’s where the salt shaker went?

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MzNicky in East Jesus, TN's avatar

unquestionably.

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arne link's avatar

Honestly! I sometimes think that there is someone secretly living in my house and moving stuff around. Sometimes I think I get a glimpse of them out of the corner of my eye...

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Gina's avatar

just lost my sunglasses but got 2 canes at garage sale to add to the collection - I need a multitude because there never seems to be one

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cablecargal's avatar

Check the top of your head...that's where I always find my glasses!

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Gina's avatar

alas, not there

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🌷IntheHalloftheMtnKing's avatar

I just thought it was gremlins 😂

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Chris Hierholzer's avatar

I think there's a portal. I'm almost certain and the rubes are having a feeding frenzy with each other. Snapping at each other's tiny nuts while they're wives are cooking up stuff.

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Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Yes there is whatever dear leader says must be so Levtistupidis 11: If dear leader says it then let there be misc. portals swallowing thy drones. Thanks God because we were thinking #25 for his ass’ .

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Bob's avatar

Trump says “they’ve been trying for about 150 years to get” a ballroom. 150 years? Hmm. Maybe he’s confused about that time LBJ asked the Haggar slacks guy for more ball room.

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Susan Niemann's avatar

😂😂😂😂

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Lisa's avatar

OMG this is great Bob. Lol!

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HI2thDoc's avatar

This is a great segue to the rumored Secret Second Cold War of the Sixties when Haggar and Sansabelt vied for the bragging rights of who could accommodate LBJ's large, ahem, anatomy. This cold war was less end-of-the-world than the other one and much more interesting.

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Bob's avatar

Thanks to LBJ’s taping system, the secret was, uh, exposed.

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Cheryl ODonnell's avatar

I do remember that he had no problem conducting presidential business while seated on the porcelain throne. Was that what got taped? Crude man, but at least he succeeded in efforts to remake much of our social supports. Until Reagan and his myth of the Cadillac driving welfare mother.

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Bob's avatar

Luckily, it was in the Oval Office. His days after the White House were kind of sad. He’d have a morning meeting on his ranch, but it wasn’t as if the staff didn’t know what to do. All presidents are a mixed bag, the ratio of good to shit is what matters.

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Marlene Lerner-Bigley (CA)'s avatar

That’s why, of course, it was a cold🥶war!

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meryl selig's avatar

Can we the people tear it down when he is gone?!?!

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Cheri Collins's avatar

😂🤣😂

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Jeanne Leduc's avatar

🤣🤣

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Neal Stiffelman's avatar

It’s been (another) one of those weeks that seem to exhaust the outrage faculty. But I’m cooking up a fresh supply.

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Dr J's Sanity Space's avatar

Looking forward to your fresh supply!

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Carol C's avatar

Pastor Webbon missed the parable of the Good Samaritan if he ever did read the New Testament, and much, much more. As a Christian parent, teach your kids to fear Blacks? The label “Christian” needs to be replaced with something accurate.

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FTrump And FPutin Too's avatar

Racist Fascist Christian Nationalists rolls off the tongue.

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mary's avatar

Drop the term "Christian." The Christ I learned about would throw these evil people out of the temple faster than he ousted the grifters and the like from the Pharisees' temple.

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Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

F, And into the dumpster.

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Leu2500's avatar

The dirty little secret about Evangelicals is that pro-life is a cover for their racism

& when Obama was elected boy did that unleash their racism. (Says a midwesterner who moved to AL for work)

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Dave Drell's avatar

They are not Americans - they do not care for the democracy here and only care about themselves as a community- everyone else can go away.

Why don’t they all just move to Utah and STFU?

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

I suggest California. The South is highly overrated.

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arne link's avatar

Hell to the No! We don't want them. We'll build a damn wall to keep them out. Gah!

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Lisa K. Obrien's avatar

Jeezus, we are desperately trying to drive those fucksticks OUT of the state!

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Joanne Filipo's avatar

Oh uncle Jeff, how do you do it? Make a totally shitty week somewhat tolerable…Lordy, where do we go from here?

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Mary Hall's avatar

My favorite T💩p quote of the week/month/year is when asked what he’s going to do to help unify our country, he said, “I couldn’t care less.” -- https://www.independent.co.uk/tv/news/donald-trump-care-less-fox-interview-video-b2825880.html

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Leu2500's avatar

All the dems running in 2026 need that clip & should use it over & over.

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Dave Drell's avatar

Eggsactly! Why are you bothering him with “issues” and “problems” and things that he SHOULD. be doing, instead of playing fake golf and sleeping the rest of the day.

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Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

That was, indeed, a doozy! Sundowning Grampa-speak.

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Cheri Collins's avatar

Yep!

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Kay-El's avatar

The Saturday mace edition:

1. MAGA loon maces herself, there is karma after all

2. The face Mace makes before checking your gender to see if you have the right kind to enter an all gender bathroom

3. It would be appropriate to mace Dilley and Webbon if they try to force you into the kitchen

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Susan Niemann's avatar

"The face Mace makes before checking your gender to see if you have the right kind to enter an all gender bathroom”

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Susan Thant look is her trying to pry open her box of lies to have it finally say, whites only.

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DR Darke's avatar

MONDAY: Oh, that was some MAGAt screwing up with mace? I thought that was a new version of The STAR WARS Kid! 🤣 🤣 🤣

FRIDAY: Well, the upside to getting Donnie Diaperstain up bright and early is he's less likely to sundown on Faux Noize that way....

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Mingo's avatar

We could call it sun upping. I think at this point his dementia is present 24 hours a day. We're going to feel it really big. Lord, if you're listening please take him.

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Celeste Hardway's avatar

Apparently, not early enough!

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arne link's avatar

They just pump him full of drugs and deliver him to the set. It works for awhile.

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Mary Greenwald's avatar

Now wait a minute. If all these gun-toting MAGA's are dancing at the White House, America might be much safer. With the Orange One and Mikey and Marco and Petey and Bug-eyes Patel dancing with Dog Killer Noem and Bondi, they will be too happy to do raids on Immigrants that pay into Social Security and do the work white boys won't do. What a Party. They will be partying like 1984!

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Itsy Bitsy Spider's avatar

Maybe build them a roller rink, too. Noem on skates. I like it. She can body slam Patel.

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Lisa's avatar

Maybe she can trip on her hair extensions.

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arne link's avatar

OMG! Roller Derby but with idiots. What a great idea.

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longtimebirdwatcher's avatar

Yes, who goes ballroom dancing, or roller skating? They must have missed 1965-75.

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Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

Imagining “YMCA” on an interminable loop in a Black Mirror episode…

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Itsy Bitsy Spider's avatar

I’m actually glad Trump is allowing the squirrel in his brain to lead the conversation and that he leaves on the weekend to cheat at golf. He does less damage to the country that way. Imagine if he were as savvy as Putin. We wouldn’t stand a chance.

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Judy Player's avatar

So when are Epstein files going to be released?

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Lisa's avatar

Trump: "Never. Is never a good time for you?" I hate him so much.

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Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Lisa, thanks for the set-up NO, NO not even never, I hope we can look back one day and gratefully to his most famous GOLF STROKE!

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Judy Player's avatar

up to us to keep pushing. Apparently, even MTG is on our side!

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arne link's avatar

Ol' Margie stuck her finger into the wind and saw which way the wind was blowing.

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