today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit— hmm, I got nothing. for some reason, there are no notifications on my phone. okay, gang, what am I missing?
Even if they do it might not be enough. This is Texas we're talking about. The governor's office probably has Roberts's phone number saved to contacts so they can expedite an overthrow of any election that seats a Democrat.
Agreed. But it's not a bug for Texas, it's a feature. The high concentration of tiny-brained MAGAs there could def red-wave right over Talarico. The GOP will have to spend a metric shit-ton of money where it should be a BBQ-eating walk in the park, so that's fun.
Or the rest of the Texas lege decides to just ignore the results. They need to lay the groundwork for trump refusing to leave in 28 if he gets voted out. Why not start in texas? That's arguably where it would be easiest to do.
California says "Hold my beer." According to yesterdays' reports on the Governor's race, "Two new polls show Republican Steve Hilton leading, with Democrats Tom Steyer and Xavier Becerra close in tow." We may wake up to a conservative Brit in the Governor's seat in November. KMN
Man, if only the party hadn't let the serial sexual predator position himself as the frontrunner for that seat apparently in the hopes that the women he assaulted would just stay quiet.
Never underestimate the stupidity of Texas citizens. They are some of the most fucking stupid people you will ever meet and there is nothing to dissuade them from truth.
Saw a pretty young lady with a drawl on YouTube who joked that forensic science doesn't work in Alabama because there are no dental records and the DNA is all the same
On September 2, 2015, Rep. Allen Farley (R-McCalla) called on Attorney General Luther Strange's (R) office to look into allegations that Bentley used state funds to cover up activities related to his divorce and an alleged affair. The alleged improper spending included overtime paid to state troopers on the governor's security detail and use of state aircraft for non-official purposes. Bentley denied misusing state property and called the divorce a private matter.[11][12] The attorney general's office acknowledged receipt of the letter, but declined to comment on the allegations.[13]
Alabama First Lady Dianne Bentley filed for divorce from her husband of 50 years on August 28, 2015.[12]
On March 22, 2016, another allegation of the affair was made by a former head of the Alabama Law Enforcement Agency, Spencer Collier. Collier claimed that Bentley had been involved with a senior political adviser named Rebekah Mason and that he may have misused state funds in order to cover up the affair. Bentley fired Collier from his post that same day for allegedly misusing ALEA funds; Collier claimed his dismissal was retaliation for refusing to cover up the affair.[14][15]
Recordings of the governor were published on March 23, 2016, which included comments of a sexual nature made to Mason on a telephone call in 2014. In a press conference on March 24, Bentley did not disavow the recordings but denied ever having a physical relationship with Mason. He apologized to the people of Alabama for the comments on the recording, but stated: "I have never done anything illegal [as governor]. I have never asked any member of my staff or any cabinet member to lie." He further added: "[a]t no time have I ever used the resources of my office to facilitate a relationship of any type."[16]
It really warms my heart to see you express this joy and reverence for her, and it honestly takes the sting out of the daily horrors (as does your humor.)
Jeff, The "daily Claudia" is uplifting beyond, perhaps, your wildest dreams. Seeing her picture brings and immediate smile and calm to me. She must have been an incredible woman.
…….”the 2028 Democratic presidential candidate must run on a promise to appoint a cabinet-level Secretary of Unfucking All That Shit, to restore the White House — and all of DC — to its former dignified state”………..DID YOU HEAR THAT DEMS? UNFUCK ALL THAT SHIT! Well said Jeff!
Call me a skeptic but I don’t see positive change no matter who wins. The Democrats are too invested in the status quo. I remember when the neoliberal Obama ran promising “change”. At the time I failed to see that what he meant was more homeless people will be begging for change, meaning you and me.
Most people refuse to see this.
Most people dislike the inconvenient truth.
Most people barely understand current events never mind history.
Most people make fruit flies seem highly intelligent.
I would like to see Dems have the WH, Senate and House and see what gets done. Obama had McConnell as an anchor around his neck. So much more could have been accomplished otherwise. And probably a lot less debt hanging over the US.
Moscow Mitch and his vow to make Obama a one-term president and to block every single piece of legislation. Didn't succeed at goal #1, but then joked about being "the Grim Reaper" in Obama's second term, with his desk being where bills went to die. He's another one whose extinction I will celebrate.
I was in Las Vegas last week end and drove right past the trump hotel, so obviously I had to extend my arm out the window for a long one finger salute. A visibly angry cab driver took off after me and was yelling at me something I couldn’t hear, I assumed he was a maga asshole. He caught up with me at the next light and yelled “did you do that to me?” I rolled down my window and said of course not! I did it to trump! And pointed at the hotel. He laughed and we parted the best of friends 😁
Holy crap America's Pilonidal Cyst looks like he smells! Dude looks like 100 miles of bad road.
What do you folks out there think would be happening to Joe Biden if he was showing up to work all bruised like this (I mean, aside from the bike accidents, since we saw how people treated him in light of those).
No wonder the SuperHitlerBunker needs all those medical facilities!
They are! But mainly, pilonidal cysts are a symptom, and I liken the ingrown hairs that cause him to the 77 million+ bigots. APC is a symptom of their bigotry. He promised them ethnic and racial cleansing and he's trying to deliver.
They'll gladly vote for another vile sadopopulist that tells them their own personal bigotries are good.
I nearly lost my breakfast but had to Google "What do syphilis sores look like?" when I saw the neck lesion. Conclusion is that they look like anything and everything.
The pedo criminal elect and his couch-enjoying shillbilly already brought the WWE into what once was a Department of Education, and the criminally corrupt Cabinet is a group of incompetent sociopathic circus clown rejects. It makes perfect sense that the White House has been turned into a WWE circus.
It's unfortunate we didn't recognize "Idiocracy" as a speculative documentary before it was too late.
So tired of the lies....several Doctors have signed a letter that says based on what they can see on the surface Donny has Dementia and other circulatory issues. We will never know until he drops dead and the reason for the muliti visits is his demanita which is being monitored.....we all know even if they are telling him to quit and his is not fit he will tell them to fuck all the way off.
Regarding the WH we should just put a match to it and start over. A wrestling cage on the lawn spells low-life-ignorant loser to me.....
We'll have to file Freedom of Information requests for his medical records. I've been theorizing that since he had the first version of COVID he suffered not only lung damage but vascular and circulatory issues as well. The dementia is just a bonus. He didn't help himself with the crappy lifestyle habits either. He does look like a dead man walking.
Did anyone catch (from yesterday) RFKJr playing with snakes in a corner of some building. The snakes were mating and minding their own biz and this imbecile went over and picked them up and they bit him. You can hear a woman in background screaming “put them down..they are biting you.” He is smiling.
I don’t know the accurate name for this guy’s mental illness but he’s got something. He is our Secretary of Health and Human Services….correct? We are so screwed!
RatFuck Kennedy is certifiable. It is too bad that the snakes weren't venomous, but, then again, snakes don't brush their teeth, and RatFuck isn't exactly keen on hygiene, so we can all hope for a massive infection for him.
Ironic, on that show, Curb your Enthusiasm, she was portrayed as a big defender of NRDC - gave to its causes; held seminars and info on causes to defend the environment, was like a local spokesperson,etc.
I’m sure her hubby in real life would never tolerate her doing that!
If this entire administration and Texas can’t be burnt blue in the midterms and the general then I guess we oughta change our name to United States of Netanyahu’s binky.
Hey!!…..anyone else going to the White House cage fight on the 14th ? Me neither.
As Al Franken famously called the Thug Party-lies and the lying liars who tell them. And let’s be candid here, Al was royally screwed by the nanny wing of the Democratic Party. He was crucified for some saucy behavior and photos when he was in his twenties and working at SNL, where certain cast members used to openly snort coke and consume various and sundry other substances. Dems should make a pledge to each other going forward. No more circular firing squads
It’s true. No administration has ever been so transparently corrupt, dishonest or incompetent. And it is, naturally, led by the most transparently demented psychopath ever!
today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit— hmm, I got nothing. for some reason, there are no notifications on my phone. okay, gang, what am I missing?
The last dying cough of the confederacy— ahem, I mean the GOP— got their talking points sent to them last night from Tel Aviv.
Apparently the best they can come up with against Talarico is an outright and easily disprovable lie that he is…. GASP! “Vegan”
JFC… these chodes are gonna get the floor mopped with them over Paxton, and I’m laughing all the way there lol
Talarico likes to say that he's been eating barbecue since before Paxton's first indictment.
It’s literally the easiest disprovable lie ever lol
Talarico can spend his the entire reminder of his campaign visiting BBQ joints and eating with constituents.
Tel Aviv is not sending their best…
Jimmy, my man, order that pulled pork!
I wouldn't underestimate Texas's capacity to fuck up. I don't think it would be at all surprising to see paxton win by a lot.
That's my fear. The worse they are, the more the MAGAs like it. Texas never gets it right.
Not ‘never’. Ann Richardson.
Okay, "...in a long time".
And Molly Ivins. BTW - if you haven't seen the play "Ann" written by and starring Holland Taylor, please do. Great Performances on PBS.
Ann Richards, of course, but don’t forget the fabulous Barbara Jordan
One of my favorite photos of all time https://img-s-msn-com.akamaized.net/tenant/amp/entityid/AA1RMdge.img?w=768&h=514&m=6&x=289&y=215&s=187&d=187
How bloody depressing is that? Sure hope that Democratic voters show up for Talarico, we need some young talented candidates.
Even if they do it might not be enough. This is Texas we're talking about. The governor's office probably has Roberts's phone number saved to contacts so they can expedite an overthrow of any election that seats a Democrat.
Sadly, we can see that Talarico's election will not be allowed to stand.
We apparently can not get enough scammers, felons and liars in our state government.
They did not only elect, but re-elected Ted Cruz.
Agreed. But it's not a bug for Texas, it's a feature. The high concentration of tiny-brained MAGAs there could def red-wave right over Talarico. The GOP will have to spend a metric shit-ton of money where it should be a BBQ-eating walk in the park, so that's fun.
won't happen....Talarico wins!
He might, but there is a ton of fraud in elections in the confederate states. Maybe Musk fixes things for Paxton.
Or the rest of the Texas lege decides to just ignore the results. They need to lay the groundwork for trump refusing to leave in 28 if he gets voted out. Why not start in texas? That's arguably where it would be easiest to do.
I’m with you on the positive side. And willing to fly to Texas to join an army of canvassers knocking on doors because every vote will matter.
republiCons DO know how to cheat
California says "Hold my beer." According to yesterdays' reports on the Governor's race, "Two new polls show Republican Steve Hilton leading, with Democrats Tom Steyer and Xavier Becerra close in tow." We may wake up to a conservative Brit in the Governor's seat in November. KMN
Man, if only the party hadn't let the serial sexual predator position himself as the frontrunner for that seat apparently in the hopes that the women he assaulted would just stay quiet.
Absolutely NOT!
When the November votes are counted the GOP will really have a cow
I hope so...what in the hell is Texas thinking to condone a Paxton....he's Trump 2.0 🤦♀️
Republicans are fundamentally evil people.
Um, I believe it's pronounced "vaygan". They're at an embarrassing level of desperation and I'm here for it.
Never underestimate the stupidity of Texas citizens. They are some of the most fucking stupid people you will ever meet and there is nothing to dissuade them from truth.
District court, I believe, said Alabama's gerrymander is bad.
So that's something good!
I think that was yesterday's Shit That Happened
Oh that's right! Time is a blur in these horrible, horrible, "interesting" times!
Bloated tRump looks like he’s pregnant with Yesterday’s Child, but it’s just yesterday’s shit
Overriding KKK Ivey
I really miss her predecessor, old Guv Squeeze Da Boobies.
The family trees in Alabama are pretzels.
Saw a pretty young lady with a drawl on YouTube who joked that forensic science doesn't work in Alabama because there are no dental records and the DNA is all the same
Yes, I just poached her witticism in an adjacent post when talking about Texas voters.
The attorney general in Bentley’s affair was Luther STRANGE 🤣
https://ballotpedia.org/Robert_J._Bentley
On September 2, 2015, Rep. Allen Farley (R-McCalla) called on Attorney General Luther Strange's (R) office to look into allegations that Bentley used state funds to cover up activities related to his divorce and an alleged affair. The alleged improper spending included overtime paid to state troopers on the governor's security detail and use of state aircraft for non-official purposes. Bentley denied misusing state property and called the divorce a private matter.[11][12] The attorney general's office acknowledged receipt of the letter, but declined to comment on the allegations.[13]
Alabama First Lady Dianne Bentley filed for divorce from her husband of 50 years on August 28, 2015.[12]
On March 22, 2016, another allegation of the affair was made by a former head of the Alabama Law Enforcement Agency, Spencer Collier. Collier claimed that Bentley had been involved with a senior political adviser named Rebekah Mason and that he may have misused state funds in order to cover up the affair. Bentley fired Collier from his post that same day for allegedly misusing ALEA funds; Collier claimed his dismissal was retaliation for refusing to cover up the affair.[14][15]
Recordings of the governor were published on March 23, 2016, which included comments of a sexual nature made to Mason on a telephone call in 2014. In a press conference on March 24, Bentley did not disavow the recordings but denied ever having a physical relationship with Mason. He apologized to the people of Alabama for the comments on the recording, but stated: "I have never done anything illegal [as governor]. I have never asked any member of my staff or any cabinet member to lie." He further added: "[a]t no time have I ever used the resources of my office to facilitate a relationship of any type."[16]
Well, Jeff, you’re certainly doing something useful now!
You take the good
You take the bad
Remove the good
And then you have
The facts of trump
The facts of trump
There are crimes that we all know about
And crimes that he will gloat about
The facts of trump
The facts of trump
While the world will never believe
All your dipshit, obvious schemes
And everyone is finding out
The facts of trump are all about you
(You shit-kazoo)
It takes a lot to fuck tons of teens
And then try to come off as clean
All of his "facts" are lies
(All of his "facts" are lies)
All of his "facts" are lies
All of his "facts" are liiiiiiiiii-yii-yii-yiiies
Love!
Maybe he died!
The ENDLESS WEEKEND AT BERNIES (donnies)
just wait for his cabinet meeting. he'll be dozing in his chair as the members of his junk drawer try to outdo each other with praise for Dear Leader
Details emerging that sports boycott threats helped preserve Clyburn’s seat:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DY04xWWMvaU/?igsh=MWRzYTBiamd6Ymgwcg==
I found this!
https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2026/05/alabama-callais-redistricting-gerrymandering/
https://youtu.be/MgJIxsSQZV8?si=wIleFEsFeTwsbSqd
Here’s the stupid link to “Are you aware of this shit?”
Are you aware of this shit?
It’s hard to stay rage-filled after those lovely photographs of the lovely Claudia.
that's a feature, not a bug! (oh, and thanks)
Keep ‘em coming. Life isn’t only about who we’re mad at. It’s about who we love. And you set the bar high in both counts.
It really warms my heart to see you express this joy and reverence for her, and it honestly takes the sting out of the daily horrors (as does your humor.)
My wife gives me the same look when I take pics of her doing daily stuff
Just noticed your shirt, H12thDoc...LOVE IT!!!
Found that image on the Net. Not me or my shirt. Props to whoever that is
Right?
Jeff, The "daily Claudia" is uplifting beyond, perhaps, your wildest dreams. Seeing her picture brings and immediate smile and calm to me. She must have been an incredible woman.
It absolutely is heartwarming
…….”the 2028 Democratic presidential candidate must run on a promise to appoint a cabinet-level Secretary of Unfucking All That Shit, to restore the White House — and all of DC — to its former dignified state”………..DID YOU HEAR THAT DEMS? UNFUCK ALL THAT SHIT! Well said Jeff!
Call me a skeptic but I don’t see positive change no matter who wins. The Democrats are too invested in the status quo. I remember when the neoliberal Obama ran promising “change”. At the time I failed to see that what he meant was more homeless people will be begging for change, meaning you and me.
Most people refuse to see this.
Most people dislike the inconvenient truth.
Most people barely understand current events never mind history.
Most people make fruit flies seem highly intelligent.
I would like to see Dems have the WH, Senate and House and see what gets done. Obama had McConnell as an anchor around his neck. So much more could have been accomplished otherwise. And probably a lot less debt hanging over the US.
Moscow Mitch and his vow to make Obama a one-term president and to block every single piece of legislation. Didn't succeed at goal #1, but then joked about being "the Grim Reaper" in Obama's second term, with his desk being where bills went to die. He's another one whose extinction I will celebrate.
Wait--wut? I'm not homeless; I'm sorry if you are and that it's Obama's fault.....
I volunteer to pry gold shit off the White House walls. And to call Fox reporters Nazi bitches.
He's always been a sicky
A predator and morally tricky
I know sure as heck
That thing on his neck
Fer sure ain't a Melanie hickey
Syphilis
Hmm. The bacterium responsible would be like, seriously? Ain't it bad enough that we had to infect Capone? Even Treponema pallidum has standards
Mutated BrainHerpes.
Love!
I think someone said it was tied to cancer treatment
I was in Las Vegas last week end and drove right past the trump hotel, so obviously I had to extend my arm out the window for a long one finger salute. A visibly angry cab driver took off after me and was yelling at me something I couldn’t hear, I assumed he was a maga asshole. He caught up with me at the next light and yelled “did you do that to me?” I rolled down my window and said of course not! I did it to trump! And pointed at the hotel. He laughed and we parted the best of friends 😁
So drumpf may not be a uniter, but hatred of him sure is
He unites everyone against him
very funny
Gotta watch who you flip the bird at!
Holy crap America's Pilonidal Cyst looks like he smells! Dude looks like 100 miles of bad road.
What do you folks out there think would be happening to Joe Biden if he was showing up to work all bruised like this (I mean, aside from the bike accidents, since we saw how people treated him in light of those).
No wonder the SuperHitlerBunker needs all those medical facilities!
Pilonidal cyst. 😆😆
Good one. 🤣🤣
Seth has been running with that for a while. And it's always right on!
Perianal abscesses are a whole lot stinkier!
They are! But mainly, pilonidal cysts are a symptom, and I liken the ingrown hairs that cause him to the 77 million+ bigots. APC is a symptom of their bigotry. He promised them ethnic and racial cleansing and he's trying to deliver.
They'll gladly vote for another vile sadopopulist that tells them their own personal bigotries are good.
True. Very true.
I’m afraid what I’ll find out if I Google Pilonidal Cyst.
I nearly lost my breakfast but had to Google "What do syphilis sores look like?" when I saw the neck lesion. Conclusion is that they look like anything and everything.
Thank you for your service .
Did everyone see his shitposts on his crap app?
First, he posted an identical — word for word — post (about Iran) as he did 8 days ago.
Second, as Uncle Jeff points out, he is now calling it his “6 month physical.” 6 month physical…
Now I’m no doctor, but when I need to see the doctor about something every few months vs once a year, well that ain’t good.
Some of us are totally okay that it "ain't good." If you know what I mean ...;-)
Thank you Jeff.
The pedo criminal elect and his couch-enjoying shillbilly already brought the WWE into what once was a Department of Education, and the criminally corrupt Cabinet is a group of incompetent sociopathic circus clown rejects. It makes perfect sense that the White House has been turned into a WWE circus.
It's unfortunate we didn't recognize "Idiocracy" as a speculative documentary before it was too late.
It brings up in me such rage
That my tax dollars are going to that cage
For lawn UFC
More regime buffoonery
Another embarrassment on the world stage
We need to start a “Rage Against the Cage” movement. It works for criminally corrupt presidents with moronic ideas and for the disbanding of ICE.
Right? We’re living in the script.
True. We should at least get SAG-AFTRA membership.
So tired of the lies....several Doctors have signed a letter that says based on what they can see on the surface Donny has Dementia and other circulatory issues. We will never know until he drops dead and the reason for the muliti visits is his demanita which is being monitored.....we all know even if they are telling him to quit and his is not fit he will tell them to fuck all the way off.
Regarding the WH we should just put a match to it and start over. A wrestling cage on the lawn spells low-life-ignorant loser to me.....
We'll have to file Freedom of Information requests for his medical records. I've been theorizing that since he had the first version of COVID he suffered not only lung damage but vascular and circulatory issues as well. The dementia is just a bonus. He didn't help himself with the crappy lifestyle habits either. He does look like a dead man walking.
Agree!
Did anyone catch (from yesterday) RFKJr playing with snakes in a corner of some building. The snakes were mating and minding their own biz and this imbecile went over and picked them up and they bit him. You can hear a woman in background screaming “put them down..they are biting you.” He is smiling.
I don’t know the accurate name for this guy’s mental illness but he’s got something. He is our Secretary of Health and Human Services….correct? We are so screwed!
Too bad they weren’t black mambas ala kill Bill
OK, so maybe those are snake bites on Trump's neck. They had a taste and died.
RatFuck Kennedy is certifiable. It is too bad that the snakes weren't venomous, but, then again, snakes don't brush their teeth, and RatFuck isn't exactly keen on hygiene, so we can all hope for a massive infection for him.
I think the woman screaming was his wife.
That's a whole 'nother thing to unpack. Why, Cheryl? Why?
Her "career" was over and she needed a place to lay her head that was not under a bridge. Women often marry to protect themselves.
I feel sorry for her if she felt that desperation
Ironic, on that show, Curb your Enthusiasm, she was portrayed as a big defender of NRDC - gave to its causes; held seminars and info on causes to defend the environment, was like a local spokesperson,etc.
I’m sure her hubby in real life would never tolerate her doing that!
I think so too.
I call it the KURU Effect
Looks like it. Who's brain did he eat?
Who knows? I know for sure a worm is having a feast in his!
If this entire administration and Texas can’t be burnt blue in the midterms and the general then I guess we oughta change our name to United States of Netanyahu’s binky.
Hey!!…..anyone else going to the White House cage fight on the 14th ? Me neither.
Hey Iran ?…. FYI
Latitude: 38° 53' 51.61" N
Longitude: -77° 02' 11.58" W.
A box truck packed in a lonely northern Virginia industrial park, roof rolls back, Shaheds away.
I'll go to the fight if they make Trump compete
As Al Franken famously called the Thug Party-lies and the lying liars who tell them. And let’s be candid here, Al was royally screwed by the nanny wing of the Democratic Party. He was crucified for some saucy behavior and photos when he was in his twenties and working at SNL, where certain cast members used to openly snort coke and consume various and sundry other substances. Dems should make a pledge to each other going forward. No more circular firing squads
It’s true. No administration has ever been so transparently corrupt, dishonest or incompetent. And it is, naturally, led by the most transparently demented psychopath ever!
The stupidity of this regime is stunning
The diametrical opposite of cunning
They do not inspire us
Against the next virus
Pandemics take the fun out of punning
Fox News is actually getting worse and actively destroying our country.
They have been doing that for years.
https://www.instagram.com/p/DY0H2aEiQW8/?igsh=dzc5N21vZDdzc3Zi
I didn’t realize Murdoch owns the NY POST - that explains everything that comes from that fecal yellow rag!
Funny how powerless we are re: regulating. Anything.