672 Comments

I'm a 58 year old fat feminist atheist lesbian who lives alone with multiple cats and screams at abortion protesters on the weekends here in Kansas City, KS.

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Hey lady! I’m just across State Line on the poor end of Ward Pkway doing the same! We should start a revolution :)

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Good girl 🙌🏽 keep screaming at them !!

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Love you already!

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+1!

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Stay strong!👍🏻

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Soul sisters! 🫂

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My parents retired to the Upper Peninsula in the mid 1980s. Two of my brothers followed them up there and still live there, outside Newberry. ❤️ my folks are both gone now though. It's beautiful country though.

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Oh that's wild! The Newberry area has some nice places to live, and it's near the lake.

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I’m 79 years old and am retired in beautiful Sonoma County CA. I’m a widow and have 3 adult children and 7 grandchildren. I’m so depressed about what’s happening in the world and in our country. Reading your posts every morning help me keep my sense of humor, the only thing that keeps me fucking sane! And I love reading your posts out loud to friends and family.

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Don't let the fuckers get you down, Jeannie. Get outside and enjoy that beautiful Sonoma County sunshine.

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I read them out loud too! Especially the "this week in stupid"!

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founding

My Brother lives in Oakmont in Santa Rosa.

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Love it. He makes us laugh at these tragic folks who have so much time to hate.

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Omg same! Jeff is who keeps me sane in the face of all this inhumanity!😄✌️

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Hi Jeannie! I am in Contra Costa County. Nice to hear your voice and I am right with you on being tired and worn out.

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I wrote an infamous resignation letter to Oracle in 2016 when then co-CEO Safra Katz joined the Trump transition team. My letter was covered by The Guardian and the NY Times. With a small group of volunteers I’ve been working on civ.works, an ad-free subscriber supported social network. We are in a pilot phase now and are raising the funds we need to go full production in Spring 2024. I write, am regular guest on Hudson River Radio in New York and now reside in Portugal.

I have deep appreciation for you Jeff, grateful for your coverage of critical political issues in your unique style.

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I am in Portugal as well! In Porto, you?

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Just down the road outside of Aveiro.

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Ah, lovely there! If you find yourself up here maybe we could have a cuppa and kvetch.

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I would like that, and vice versa. Porto is a terrific city, I always enjoy spending time there.

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My partner and I are interested in moving to Portugal, and would love it if either of you care to share what brought you there, and how difficult you found it to emigrate. If you have the time and want to chat, you are welcome to contact me at unwittingly@hotmail.com. Would love that!

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Will send you a note so you have my email address as well. After getting vaccinated and boosted we did a great deal of research on countries with reasonable political and economic stability, affordable and well-rated healthcare/housing, and decent infrastructure. Portugal and Spain were high on the list. The economics of Portugal were better (in our view). We then took a couple of months touring different parts of Portugal, Lisbon, Porto, and the Algarve. We applied for our residency visas and then settled in Lisbon for a year. Subsequently, for various reasons, we settled just outside of Aveiro -a university town with excellent transportation, shopping, and affordability.

We've found the people to be warm and welcoming, a great sense of community, and the affordable proximity to the rest of Europe -very inviting. It's a great culture too.

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I think your research led you to the same short list (favoring Spain, Portugal) that we've developed. Now we are working on making it happen!

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I was just in Aveiro, what a lovely town. We stopped there for lunch and a walk around on October 21 en route from Tomar (another favorite of mine) up to Porto. I tried to convince friends to move to Portugal, they are around 62 and hated the atmosphere in FL. They did a scouting trip that I helped design and ended up settling in El Paso, TX of all places. I know.

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Thankfully I can get my El Yucateco habanero hot sauce imported by the case -so saved me from frequent trips to the southwest to get my burn on.

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I just had my fourth son. We named him Bruce because after 4, fuck it. He’s a scowlin’ howlin’ beast of a baby making a good case for nominative determinism. Sometimes I think we should’ve given him a mild title, like Henry, and then maybe he wouldn’t be so bossy. But I’ve never met a bad Bruce nor heard of one either--Springsteen, Willis, Wayne, Lee... When people come to my house, I offer them earplugs at the door. I buy jars of them on Amazon subscribe and save. Small price to pay for a mess of lively people.

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I don’t have crotch goblins, by choice, but I fucking adore parents that realize not everyone appreciates your children and their extremely generous vocal range! We could so be friends!

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Crotch goblins!!! lmfao!! (Me either, btw.)

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The sign of a fabulous parent is to recognize their children aren't going to be perfect angels but their own individual selves from the moment of birth and loving them no matter what!

And your humor in acknowledging your child's lung capacity is awesome!

As a former teacher (33 years), your honesty about your children will be welcomed. 😊

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We sure have fun together and I’m grateful for that!!

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The most genuine person I know is a Bruce. You’ve set that baby up for success. But I recommend nicknaming him Howlin Wolf.

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This has to be one of the funniest comments I’ve ever read. Beastie Bruce is lucky to have you. 🤣

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You made my day!!

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Maybe in your “spare time” (if little Bruce ever slows down to take a nap) you could try your hand at writing. I’m sure a lot of younger parents could identify with you and would love your funny viewpoints! I’m old and would read anything you published, I promise!

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I do!! You can find my substack by my name here...I think. I’m sort of a Luddite, could be wrong.

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Subscribed!

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Huzzah!!

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Steer clear of the name Mike. They are total asshats 99% of the time. If they go by Michael just go TP their car. When they come out and see the complete disrespect that has been done to them, point to the biggest, meanest, bald guy in the lot and say it was him. Then, grab some popcorn quick for the show. Michael’s ego is always bigger than his wimpy assed fists.

PS: If you are in the 1% named either Mike or Michael and you are kind, this does not apply to you. 💜

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“Bruce” is a name of nobility. Remember King Robert the Bruce. All that screaming might lead to something important!

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I had an Uncle Bruce. He was a wonderful man!

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36, mother of 3, married 9 years, degrees in Economics and system administration (computer science). First vote was for Obama, mail in absentee vote. Balls deep in red state, instilling a radical teaching style to my children of "being fucking nice to humans".

It's exhausting out there. Challenging people I interact with on topics big and small, trying to shame them into opening their minds and hearts.

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Keep on keeping on! I’m really impressed with any and every red stater who is actually a kind person who votes with your heat and mind.

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Godspeed!

I moved from red state to blue state the daily frustrations of red state living disappeared.

I was surrounded by neighbors with Don't Thread on me flags, *who* were they trying to threaten? Their own community? I had to get out.

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I don’t blame you for moving. My brother was going to retire to Northern Arizona and after a few visits there decided it would be safer to stay in California, where he’s still presently working and living, for his own safety…..

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Sorry to hear you landed in the parts of my stare that worship the Golden tRump. Parts of Maricopa County and most of Pima County are blue.

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I'm glad people are moving into Arizona, Texas, Florida etc... Keep em away from me

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The folks moving here are largely blue and coming to cities. They're frustrating the ruralites by polluting the Genepool with intelligence.

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I'll believe it when TX actually turns blue.

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I'm only referencing Arizona. Texas may be hopeless.🫣

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I am a New Jersey guy…..we have plenty of trumpettes is NJ…..sad but true— especially in South Jersey……

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Being a trumpettes is a disease, a way of life, no place is immune, just some are better than others.

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Agree and that disease is powerful and growing in certain areas. Watch what happens when his civil trial turns to shit and his federal trials go against him…..I fear for this country.

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New neighbor next door . First thing up we’re 3 flags blah blah blah. Don’t tread on me. He’s white, privileged and seems to be fine, but letting everyone know his Q Anon intentions.

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Yes, I'm sorry, that is awful, it's nearly unbearable.

Who is their enemy?

Their neighbors? Their community? Their fellow Americans!?

I don't get it.

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I'm a displaced NY'er; born and raised in NYC, lived in Long Island until moving to South Florida in the mid 90's. At the time, it was an affordable place to live. I was a stay-at-home mom to our two kids and life was pretty good. Fast forward to today and I think most of you know what's happened to FL.

I was first eligible to vote in 1982, but I decided to wait until 1984 so that I could cast my first-ever vote against Ronald Reagan.

I work for a medical software company in Fort Lauderdale, as the office manager.

Retirement is about 7 years down the road for me (though my husband retired 5 years ago) so until then I'm just chugging along. I want to be a reverse snowflake and leave FL to retire elsewhere. I'm angry about what's happening down here. And as the mother of a trans son, knowing that he has a target on his back because of our governor makes me even angrier. I get involved in my community supporting LGBTQ causes and doing whatever I can to help. I am not optimistic.

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Feeling sorry for you in Florida, my sons family will not go to visit a relative in Florida for fear of their trans child and what could happen. I won't go visit my brother in Florida as I don't want to spend a dime of my money there. This country is so fucked up. Good luck to you and your family.

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I'm in Florida and I don't go to Tennessee if I can help it; never North or South Carolina. We're not all bad in Florida but we have an evil Governor. I think he's all bark and no bite.

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I know you aren't all bad in Florida! I have friends there too!

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We do have more than our fair share though!

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He definitely has bite to him, which is why there are laws already on the books targeting trans rights (as well as parents' rights, et al)... but some of his bites are proving to be mere nips as they get struck down legally.

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You have a good point. Let's hope more are struck down. If we could get rid of all the gerrymandering, perhaps we could change a lot of what he's done. He's trying to be the "rightest" of them all trying to beat TFG. I really despise him and his wife.

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Best comment of the day: "This country is so fucked up." A truer statement I have not read so far. The rhetoric coming out of the FL state capitol is as sick as it gets.

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Good luck; know you are supported and not alone!❤️

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Thank you!!!!!

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I hear you about leaving Florida. I'm not stepping foot there until the MAGAts are no longer in control, so maybe never? Now the only place we visit to get break from very cold northern New York winter is SoCal. Where will you go if you leave?

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That's a tough one only because my husband is a country mouse and I'm a city mouse. Never mind that he was born and raised on Long Island, he yearns for vast open spaces, etc. That's not me. So, we're not sure. But if things don't change in FL, or god forbid if they change for the worse, I won't care where I wind up, I just need to get the hell out of here.

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Look into Eugene, Oregon! Liberal College town for you and beautiful wide open spaces abound for him. Miss living there, but we moved to San Diego when my husband joined the Navy and by the time we retired we had 2 kids in school and didn’t want to disrupt their lives. Then they grew up and started families here so we stayed. Now that we’re retired our granddaughter loved visiting Oregon so much, she moved there for college.

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That's actually a really good idea. My younger son (who is trans) left FL 4 years ago, sensing the writing on the wall of what was starting to happen in FL and he moved to Seattle, to a much more accepting social climate. Oregon would be a nice choice for us.

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I have a trans nephew. He and his husband moved from Rocklin, CA to Seattle and have never been happier.

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Perfect. A safe Blue state. Close enough to Washington but not quite as cold. And NO sales tax in Oregon.

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I visited Florida when I was in High School, back when water fountains were segregated still having signs but painted over. I never felt that I needed to go back for anything I left in FL.

It is with great reluctance I occasionally visited relatives in TN. The South of this country has become a Red Disaster zone via the GQP, Fox and bigoted people like the newly minted Speaker of the house.

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You would be more than welcome in Burlington County, NJ. We have laws here that would protect your son, and welcome both of you with open arms.

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I’m 68 years old, grew up in WI; married, divorced, married again now. My husband and I lived in AZ for 15 years but moved back to WI two years ago (missed the family). Four kids, two grandkids. I was a nurse, he was a cop- a match made in heaven.

I loved reading you, Jeff, on Twitter- but had to leave that site so was lucky to find Substack. I use way too many nasty words and people are kind of surprised about that because I look like some little meek grandma. Usually. 😂😂😂😂

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I'm in Wisconsin too. (Appleton) I am hoping we can get back to the progressive state that we used to be.

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I'm just south of you in oshkosh. Not many people remember that Wisconsin was in the top three progressive states in the country, even more progressive than California. 40 years of Republicans defunding education, attacking unions, and pushing their Christian nonsense has dragged us down.

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Yes, that is correct! I just hope we can turn this Gerrymandering around.

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Hopefully you can do for Wisconsin what Gretchen Whitmer has done for Michigan!!!

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Though I am currently in Georgia, where I started out, I lived in Wisconsin from 2004 until 2021 so I know that culture. Hated Scott but loved Spotted Cow.

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I remember! I grew up west of Chicago, in St. Charles.

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I live in Wisconsin as well!!

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My best friend lives in Belleville, just south of Madison. A beautiful state! I also swear way too much. But a career in advertising will do that. 😂

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65. Mobile County, AL. Retired marine biologist (sharks, yes really). And yes, I can cuss 'like a sailor'. Main hobby is dog sports mainly (agility, barn hunt, FAST CAT) with my 2 Aussies. Grateful for this substack whidh helps me keep what sanity I have left after the last 6 years.

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I grew up in Mobile and now live i Birmingham. Went to UA and ended up 50 years ago marrying my sociology professor. Three kids, four grandkids. I cuss way too much for a church organist, so Jeff’s columns really hit home with me.

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I have 3 Maltese, and I wish there were dog agility events here. One of them is a natural athlete, 5 pounds of incredible energy and strength, lol

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Hi Lisa! As soon as I saw AL and marine biologist, I knew it was you. The Aussies and agility cinched it.

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Hi Amy!!!!!!

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Lived in Mobile from 1977-1987. Used to sing at St Ignatius up on the hill by Springhill College and do community theater back in the day with Penny Dennis.

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I grew in in St Mary’s parish.

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Sang there before moving to St Ignatius

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I spent time in the of summer 1973 at Dauphin island and we caught a small shark!

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There are lots of them there!

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My family is one of the 2% of farmers in the US (MN). We are currently harvesting our crops of corn and soybeans. Those of us who also work 'off-farm' work in the ag industry. I am a safety engineer at a large ag co-operative. I also raise sheep and goats with my daughter. Planning to retire at 62, which is 18 months from now (I am the only dem. in management). Terrified of what the future holds for my kids (in their 20's) and grandson.

Jeff, this substack is one of the few things that give me any hope...thank you so much for being here!

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Hi! I work in the ag sector, too! For one of the multinationals, but not THAT multinational. And more in horticultural and not row crops.

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I'll be 66 in February. Like you, the first time I voted was for Jimmy Carter in 1976. I began my professional career as a registered nurse. I worked in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. Then I went back to school and ultimately acquired a doctorate in behavioral neuroscience. I've worked in academia since the 1990s. I have 4 fur babies: 2 Australian Shepherds (Sophia and Sylvia; Sophia is a mini) and 2 rescue cats, Stella and Sasha. Oh, and I love Firesign Theater. I think we're all bozos on this bus.

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Me too on the age.

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LOVE Firesign Theater!! 👍

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Me too on first vote for Carter!

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55, Westchester County NY, music teacher (band), 2 teen sons. Potty mouth. Adore your writing/general outlook on things.

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Love a good potty mouth!

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Love a music teacher!

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Hi all! I'm Meredith. I'm fiftysomething and work as a UX writer at a bank. I also live in Maine, so it's been one hell of a week and I'm tits-up on the couch for the day/foreseeable future. I write fun stuff in my spare time and have been published in McSweeney's and some other places. Jeff's daily emails make me LOL every day, and I've adopted some Jeffisms including "Little Donny Fuckface," "vermin-infested golf motel/ex-wife cemetery." and "shouty degenerate," just to name a few. Nice to "meet" you people.

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Those are my favorite phrases too! What happened in Maine is just so effing horrific. No reason to own one of god damned guns! Except, Repugnicants.

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Jeff’s genius shows through with his witty (and often copied by others) descriptives

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I am about your age and am a retired social worker.I am married and my husband retired a few years ago from the insurance industry.I started taking violin lessons at the age of 60 and am learning by the Suzuki method and am in Book 2.I love kitties and have 2.I, too, do not like to talk about myself and have really enjoyed this space from it’s creator to all of the voices of the various commentators.Thank-you once again.

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I tried violin at 50....it cried, begged me to stop so I did.. no talent. .wish you luck with it. It's a gorgeous instrument and the method works.. L.

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I am having a ball with it.This was always on my bucket list and I am thrilled to cross this one off of the list.I am playing Scottish and Irish fiddle music in addition to Suzuki.Thanks for the well wishes.

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I started drum lessons at age 51 and now three years in!🤘

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I played the violin as a kid. I had some talent, but not enough. Good for you for trying. Check out Hillary Hahn's videos on You Tube.

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I'm a Social Worker!!! Rock on!

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Me, too! ❤️

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I’m 70 years old-eek! I am a retired principal, reading specialist....and anything else the district threw my way. I loved my job! Been married for 45 years to a photojournalist-also retired. I live in Wisconsin-(thankful for Gov. Evers). I have played in the World’s Largest Trivia Contest with a great team of friends since 1974-April 2024 contest (which lasts for 3 days) will be our 50th year! Again-thanks for your news each day!

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Wisconsin here too!

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55, school counselor in the south Bronx, 3 kids, one husband, one dog. As I am typing this, I am listening to Ron Desantis bleating away on MTP; just reinforcing my gratitude for you, your humor, and your righteous anger.

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And Kristen Welker is letting him. (No follow-ups as usual)

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She did challenge him on his silence around the Nazis marching in Florida. I thought that was at least, something. But yes, there seem to be very few journalists who follow up well, but even fewer politicians who will agree speak with those few. It's maddening, especially when so many in the GOP seem to have been trained to flood the zone with a firehose of misinformation, making it nearly impossible for any journalist to fact check in real time.

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They're all scared of these bastards. If you can't handle your job, quit. We need real journalists, not access whores.

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Why even bother with him? He is a has been who will crash and burn soon enough.

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De Satan is toast.

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I certainly hope so. He's frightening!

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Agree. What worries me, as a FL resident, is what happens when he finally does crash and burn with the POTUS run and comes back to FL as a pissed off loser. We'll be the recipients of his vindictiveness.

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I understand...I dont have an answer. I wish the Democratic party could find its footing in Florida. 🤦‍♀️

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Hi Jeff, I read your column every day and I'm so glad I'm entitled to your opinion! It is very informative, entertaining, really smart and right on everything I believe and care about. I'm married, female, 76 years young and my husband and I live in Columbia County in upstate New York. We have three adult children and 2 teenage grandsons with another on the way! That's enough about me, thanks for asking!

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