losing loser loses bigly in Iran
awesome job, imbecile
what the fuck was the point of that?
after giving the entire world a collective anxiety attack as the clock ticked down and we all waited to see if a deranged maniac would make good on his threat to make ‘a whole civilization die tonight’ — after forcing us all to be unwilling participants in a reality show called Bomb Or No Bomb — Preznit Fuckwit at the last minute agreed to a ceasefire that leaves the world arguably worse off than it was before he began his unprovoked, unnecessary and illegal war.
and now the shithead wants a cookie.
fuck you, you fucking fuck. you don’t get a cookie.
this insufferable prick is so proud of himself. listen to him blither. a big day for world peace! lots of positive action! big money will be made! a golden age of the Middle East!
you’re welcome, world! where’s my cookie?
Senator Chris Murphy, please explain to the moron why he doesn’t get a cookie.
“who knows what’s going on. Donald Trump lies every single day. clearly he’s not telling the truth. but if you accept even part of the Iranian statement, Donald Trump has agreed to give Iran control of the Strait of Hormuz. that is extraordinary … if at the very least this agreement gives Iran the right to control the Strait, that is cataclysmic for the world.”
how is this any kind of win for us? six weeks ago, the Strait was free for anyone to use. now, The New York Times is reporting that each ship crossing it would have to pay a $2 million toll to Iran.
art of the fucking deal, am I right?
I’m so tired of Donny’s act. all the unnecessary drama. all the carnival barking. all the threats and the chest-beating and the relentless need to grab all the attention and hog all the headlines. the need to get into a pointless dick-measuring contest with the entire world.
it’s fucking exhausting. and for what?
bupkis, that’s what.
Donny blundered into an unwinnable war because his despot bestie Netanyahu goaded him into it, and his piss-drunk Secretary of Death convinced him that his warfighting warfighers would warfight the shit out of Iran, and it would be over in an afternoon. then, when it wasn’t, there was never any plan B beyond flushing billions of dollars down the toilet and clownfucking around until the Strait of Hormuz got shut down — and now, after backing himself into a corner, he’s forced to eat Iranian shit and agree to their terms for a ceasefire.
he always does this, because he’s a fucking loser. he acts first and thinks never, won’t listen to experts, and then ends up with the short end of every stick. it’s how he bankrupted six casinos, it’s how be bungled the response to a pandemic, and it’s how he just got his ass handed to him in a war he never should have started.
awesome job.
and remember, this is Donny we’re talking about. he’s demented as fuck, and he’s a stark barking lunatic. he’s erratic, unpredictable and uncontrollable. who’s to say he won’t wake up with an overfull diaper one morning next week and decide to go back the genocidal warpath? he remains a menace to the world, and he needs to be removed from office — pronto.
oh wait, the stupid shit isn’t finished. Donny’s worked himself into a Big Mad over CNN’s reporting of what Iran claims was the deal he agreed to.
that’s hysterical. Donny’s having ‘the authorities’ look into whether or not CNN ‘committed a crime’ by reporting the news, and he’ll get back to us with the results later.
what ‘authorities’?
shut the fuck up, you drunk-with-power buffoon. do you have any idea how infantile you sound? ‘I’m going to report you to the News Police and then you’ll be sorry!’
what are you, five years old?
now check this out. Donny’s imagining that he’s going to be business partners with Iran — that he wants the US and Iran to share revenues from the Strait of Hormuz tolls.
This morning, I asked President Trump if he’s okay with the Iranians charging a toll for all ships that go through the Strait of Hormuz, he told me there may be a Joint US-Iran venture to charge tolls:
“We’re thinking of doing it as a joint venture. It’s a way of securing it — also securing it from lots of other people.”
“It’s a beautiful thing”
oh, come on. Donny’s just bullshitting now. he’s making it up as he goes along, blurting out whatever fuckbrained notion pops into his fat head.
once again, he’s acting first and thinking never.
he’s insane, and he’s living in a dream world. he’s lost what’s left of his mind, and he’s only going to get worse.
lucky us.
hey, you know who can go fuck themselves? all the Republicans who were totally down with Dear Leader’s plan to genocide the shit out of Iran by making ‘a whole civilization die,’ that’s who.
I’m looking straight at you, Rep. Carlos Gimenez.
“the president has to follow through with his threats and also we need to finish it off and this regime has to go. and so I support what the president is doing. Iran is like a cancer and sometimes the cure to cancer hurts, but the cancer has to be eliminated. and the cancer is Iran.”
is the Republican Party even redeemable at this point, when so many of their members are openly cheerleading for genocide? how do you find your way back from that?
I’m also fed up with all the hand-wringers who could have put an end to this shit before it ever got started, but chose not to. listen to Republican Senator Ron Johnson. oh sure, he says (almost) all the right things in the clip below —
“I am hoping and praying that President Trump is, that this really is bluster. I do not want to see us start blowing up civilian infrastructure. I do not want to see that. we are not at war with the Iranian people. we are trying to liberate them.”
yeah, you do that, Ron — hope and pray.
pro tip for Ron Johnson and his ilk: if you had done your fucking jobs and voted in favor of that war powers resolution that would have constrained Dear Leader’s ability to bomb the shit out of Iran, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation right now. so don’t come whining to me about how terrible it is have to hope and pray that the madman you enabled is just blowing smoke about murdering an entire country. you had the power to stop it — and and you did nothing.
fuck off. go peddle your hopes and prayers elsewhere. we’re all stocked up today.
to find today’s Hero of the Day, we had to go all the way back nine years — because it’s presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, on the campaign trail in 2016.
everyone remembers the email lady’s famous (and totally accurate) line about how Donny is ‘temperamentally unfit’ to be president.
“he is not just unprepared. he is temperamentally unfit to hold an office that requires knowledge, stability and immense responsibility. this is not someone who should ever have the nuclear codes — because it’s not hard to imagine Donald Trump leading us into a war just because somebody got under his very thin skin.”
but do you remember what she said next?
listen to the email lady perfectly predict how Donny would shit the bed in Iran.
“Donald Trump says we shouldn’t have done the deal. we should have walked away. but that would have meant no more global sanctions and Iran resuming their nuclear program, and the world blaming us. so then what? war? telling the world ‘good luck, you deal with Iran’? of course, Trump doesn’t have answers to those questions. Donald Trump doesn’t know the first thing about Iran, or its nuclear program. ask him. it will become very clear very quickly. there’s no risk of people losing their lives if you blow up a golf course deal. but it doesn’t work like that in world affairs.”
HOLY FUCK, ALL THAT SHIT CAME TRUE.
don’t you miss the days when actual experts were running this country? don’t you miss leaders who could speak in complete sentences?
Hillary was one hundred percent correct about what America would be like under the reign of a Mad King Donny — and how did America respond? by telling her to shut the fuck up and go away and learn to knit.
shitty timelines gonna shitty timeline.
here’s your daily reminder that I can be found on Blue Sky at this link.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
not gonna lie — if Donny had bombed Iran last night, I was going to take a mental health break today
A morning meditation to calm and ground you in these difficult times:
Sit with your back straight and eyes closed. Picture a beautiful meadow. Birds are chirping. A fawn grazes. Donald Trump enters wandering aimlessly. Two uniformed men follow, rip off his toupe and drag him away by his overly long red tie. He is placed in a cell and fed baloney sandwiches on white bread for the rest of his miserable life.
Now slowly return to the present and have a great day!