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Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit

"At least 2 ships attacked in Strait of Hormuz after Trump announces indefinite extension of Iran ceasefire"

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/us-iran-war-strait-of-hormuz-2-ships-attacked-peace-talks-jeopardize/

so, the ceasefire is going just swimmingly, it seems

Unity In Defiance's avatar

Well if it’s coming from the Mar a Lardo Messiah we have to play the opposite game — because up is down and left is right… and oh Hell… know I’m dizzy.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

...but wait there's more!

SethTriggs's avatar

The Straits of Schrödinger strike again!

Linda Weide's avatar

"it’s just an infinite series of disastrous decisions, one right after another, cooked up by crackpots, clowns and charlatans."

Morgan's avatar

Exactly Linda!!

Eva's avatar

I was thinking how the Army probably spread the Spanish flu in 1918…

As for Mr Wersh, it’s easy

Yes, Trump lost. Heck even if you don’t THINK it was legit, he still lost

No, none of my assets are tied up with Epstein.

Pretty easy

David M Marko's avatar

Warren needed to call out the obfuscation by Wersh by saying, "OK, since you didn't deny that Trump lost the 2020 election it can go on record that you acknowledge that he did lose and since you say that you will sell any investment vehicles tied to Jeffery Epstein if you are confirmed it can go on record that you currently have such investments, since you can't sell what you don't have".

Robert Eckert's avatar

The "Spanish" flu started in Kansas, and was spread to Europe by the American Expeditionary Force. It came to be called the Spanish flu because all the countries involved in the war, including us, suppressed all news about the disease but Spain reported it when people close to their royal family came down with it.

Linda Weide's avatar

In fact, given that the US military stranded on ships for way too long has seemingly run low on provisions, and hungry, emaciated sailors and others will be less prepared to fight off the influenza and other viruses. I mean, read that they don't even have tampons on the ship. We know this is a woman hating military but no period products! Yikes.

As Jeff said, "it’s just an infinite series of disastrous decisions, one right after another, cooked up by crackpots, clowns and charlatans."

MmeRose's avatar

Oh, but that is the reason Our Secretary of Warfighters wants women out of the military - there are no period products! It’s impossible, besides, they should stay home and have babies…or is that Musk saying that? All of these trashy white guys are starting to look alike.

SPW's avatar

Mutiny anyone?

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Linda, We just love going backwards because ‘the military’ has been the most progressive of the US gov large functioning bodies. First for integration and good with ridding the misogyny too. Some made it into politics after retiring from the armed forces.

Cathy Rady's avatar

"No, none of my assets are tied up with Epstein"

is easily provable, one way or the other.

whereas Perjury - lying to Congress while under oath - is a felony.

Dave Drell's avatar

another crooked Republitard appointee - who would guess?

Dave Drell's avatar

another crooked Republitard appointee - who would guess?

Ellen McKenzie's avatar

But these people cannot stop lying.

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

One sentence pretty much warshes the whole thing clean so as it stands it will never go away for him. We will make sure of it won’t we.

Emma Ray's avatar

Looks like it's Mr. Warsh, not Mr.Wersh......not sure which is worse! HaHa

Linda McCaughey's avatar

As usual. Ho-hum. Trump is too unimaginative and dull to have any truly brilliant tricks up his sleeve. How embarrassing would it be to be a toady to the world's most despicable human! No sense of self-worth whatsoever. Transport them all to Waffle House!

rlritt's avatar

His toadies are there to steal and collect bribes while voters are stuck paying attention to the big leader.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

For a second I thought you said to transport them all to the White House. An honest mistake on my part. I miss the duck too Linda.

Miselle's avatar

BRAVO to the update! It's EXACTLY what has been running through my mind regarding Iran's responses to Trump the last few days, and knowing how much we all enjoy when you drop in a Monty Python, I rejoice to see this!

Linda Weide's avatar

Yup! As you put it perfectly, "it’s just an infinite series of disastrous decisions, one right after another, cooked up by crackpots, clowns and charlatans."

Cathy Rady's avatar

so apparently, both a Greek and a Panamanian flagged ship turned off their Automatic Identification Systems and attempted to traverse the Strait in secrecy.

how 'interesting' that the US blockade didn't stop them, but the Iranians managed to do so.

Guess that, at the moment, their navy is doing better than ours is.

Who'd a thunk?!

Linda McCaughey's avatar

Can't be. Preznit Fuckwit has assured us that their navy is at the bottom of the sea.

Eskaveeda's avatar

Thanks ever so much for your posts. Your take on these headache-inducing times always give a much-needed injection of humour. I’ve had to bookmark the Marx Bros gif for emergency relief.

Unity In Defiance's avatar

As a veteran I can’t even begin to stress the importance of vaccines.

When recruits go through any branch of basic, there is literally a “Basic training flu” and it is BAD!

Notice also, whiskey dick Pete picked the least important on the schedule of vaccines as a stress test — we all know vaccines turn you into a big wuss after all.

Bonnie Council's avatar

And his “excuse” for telling troops not to worry about protecting themselves from a deadly illness is to be rid of “overreaching mandates that only weaken our war-fighting capabilities.” Make that make sense. His real problem is he just doesn’t want anyone to be more in charge than himself. Nobody - not even an experienced general, is allowed to tell “his” soldiers what to do. Pathetic.

Linda Weide's avatar

As Jeff said, "it’s just an infinite series of disastrous decisions, one right after another, cooked up by crackpots, clowns and charlatans."

SPW's avatar

Do you suppose this laissez-faire attitude toward vaccines goes for all the many vaccines recruits get? What the holy hell if so? We have known all along that this bunch of crime-ridden grifters doesn’t give a holy gd about our service men and women and this just goes overboard proving it.

Cheri Collins's avatar

“War-fighting” is such an idiotic, juvenile expression. 🤢

Ginny Hall's avatar

Not mandatory doesn't mean forbidden. I hope our troops will have more sense than Pete and Bobby.

Bonnie Council's avatar

Me too. I actually believe they do. In fact, I hope every last one of them gets a flu vaccine this year.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Viruses can't harm warfighters, at least in his alcohol-addled brain

Brian Riley's avatar

It's not the least important though, we already know what happens when a respiratory virus runs rampant on a ship, and it happened, oh my, during Prezdint Fuckwit's last presidency. It was USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN-71) , COVID took out an aircraft carrier when there was no vaccine for it.

Highly contagious diseases are not good things in cramped quarters, here's the study

https://academic.oup.com/milmed/article/186/1-2/23/6012471?login=false

This administration is increasingly looking like a failing act on The Gong Show.

Cheri Collins's avatar

The Gong Show! Perfect!

rlritt's avatar

Hegseth is such a cartoon tough guy. I bet if someone slapped him he'd cry and ruin his makeup.

Joyce's avatar

He has all the indicators of someone who would burst into tears because someone spoke sharply to him. If he were slapped, he'd fall to the floor in an extended screaming tantrum.

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Or if a skateboard came close to his private, but non functional nuts.

Mike Hammer's avatar

Serious case of Arrested Development

Kay-El's avatar

I also wonder who will be left to fight Trump’s dirty wars?

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

Kay, remember when dopey diaper boy would not allow a cruise ship to come home to the US because there were 7 cases of Covid on board. His reason was flawless, we had no reported cases other than those. Nothing like science denial for medical logic.

Kay-El's avatar

He denies everything that isn’t in his favor Douglas.

Robert Eckert's avatar

Unless soldiers are now being given the choice to refuse deployments if any antivaxxers are going, Pete is not giving soldiers a choice to make for themselves, but a choice that binds all of the thousands of other soldiers who may be forced to be in close quarters with them for an extended period.

Kim Steeves's avatar

Excellent point!!

I would make sure that I was vaccinated up the yassoo, being in confined quarters with non-vaxers!

Carlye Hooten's avatar

It's what happens when people decide that history doesn't apply. 🤦🏽‍♀️ Throughout history, armies have fallen to terrible diseases, many of which we still don't have vaccines for.

Next they'll be saying that basic sanitation is a "woke left conspiracy," and quit requiring handwashing, kitchen kitchen cleaning and water purification; we'll be back to losing thousands to dysentery.

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

History of wars 101 the kings men or army lost one of the big invasions of the Spanish Castle. Spaniards did nothing while something mysterious in fact too small to see BACTERIA killed the kings army it was just a matter of time. They could see eachother just a few hundred yards away camped out and dying. But vaccines are the danger…not.

Linda Weide's avatar

As a teacher I can't either. Add to that that complaints are getting out that there is not enough food which is going to mean weakened military getting influenza.

As Jeff said, "it’s just an infinite series of disastrous decisions, one right after another, cooked up by crackpots, clowns and charlatans. "

It is what Prof. Bob Pape calls the Escalation Trap theory.

https://substack.com/@thelefthook/note/p-194716226?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=f0qfn

Major Kong's avatar

I suffered from the flu during basic training. The boot camp crud.

MB Kiefer's avatar

Just as an FYI, though, the World War I flu (aka: the Spanish flu) wasn't just the regular seasonal flu. It was a particularly deadly form of the H1N1 virus. Fortunately it eventually mutated to a less lethal form, but part of the regular seasonal flu vaccine we get today protects against H1N1.

If you wonder why it was called the Spanish flu, it was because other countries in Europe censored information about the outbreak so as not to cause a panic. Spain, however, was neutral, not involved in the war and not subject to its censorship. They were the only ones reporting about it, so it became the Spanish flu. Your useless trivia for today. 😊

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

Kevin Warsh promises to sell his investments tied to Epstein if confirmed, just like Piss-drunk Pete promised to quit drinking. I have an idea…How about we stop nominating people who are doing shit they have to promise not to do.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

I will sell those if confirmed is an affirmative to the first question, "do you have epstein related financials?" He can't even lie well.

Joyce's avatar

Yeah--that was exactly my reaction when I heard him say that. "So, in other words, you do have Epstein-related financials that you will only divest if you are confirmed. Otherwise, you will continue to hold those investments that connect you to Jeffrey Epstein" would have been my follow up.

Robert Eckert's avatar

It raises the question of whether the Trump administration has more info about his Epstein connections that can be used to blackmail him.

Ellen McKenzie's avatar

He must be in the dead pedo files.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Who in Trump's circle isn't at this point? At least his financial circle.

Jane's avatar

And Republicans will most likely confirm him!

Frank Nuts's avatar

Excellent suggestion Steph!

Lois Henry's avatar

Brilliant idea. Funny how the President doing the appointing didn’t think of it first.

Lucius's avatar

Re: the ships going dark and getting past the blockade:

I desperately want it to be a situation where the US naval ships absolutely fucking knew they were there and let them pass because morale is low and everything is fucking stupid.

Even better if there were US sailors on the decks of our ships waving casually as the iranian ships went by.

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I didn't think of that scenario, but it wouldn't shock me if that's what actually happened

Lucius's avatar

A whole line of US sailors just giving a thumbs up as the iranian ships go by.😂

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Some sailors “allegedly” had something to do with a fire onboard that put one of the ships out of commission for several weeks now.

They can’t all be buying into the lies they’re being told can they?

Lucius's avatar

I'm imagining a Mel Brooks-ian scene like in Hot Shots part Deaux where the two boats cross paths and Charlie Sheen and Martin sheen both yell "I loved you in Wall Street!"

Betsy L's avatar

That's the USS Gerald R. Ford, biggest ship in the fleet, and I think right now it's docked in Crete, undergoing repairs for the, ahem, "accidental" fire.

Grace Kennedy's avatar

Benedict Arnold used the quiet and dark maneuver on lake Champlain.

Julia Grey's avatar

Come on. Our ships have fucking RADAR that can see other ships on the water from miles away. I call bullshit.

Elizabeth M. (Massachusetts)'s avatar

Apparently Dear Leader forgot about the radar.

Joyce's avatar

Going dark means shutting down all electronics/lights on the ship so it can't be detected by those means, but I can't believe that radar couldn't spot it--it's not as if the US ships would be scanning the entire Pacific Ocean.........

Claudia Montague Wheatley's avatar

"let them pass because morale is low and everything is fucking stupid."

And have you seen what the Navy is feeding our warfightin' sailors?

A hungry man is an angry man, Donald.

Nancy's avatar

They are too hungry from getting poor rations that they couldn't see or hear any ships.

Belfora's avatar

Excellent notion. Along the same lines, I wonder if the sailors are weighing the pros and cons of committing war crimes vs getting the flu. War crimes. Flu. War crimes. Flu.

Choices matter.

Bonnie Council's avatar

Perfect. 👏🏻

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Isn't firing on civilian ships, like tankers, a war crime? We were observing international law, for a change.

Frank Nuts's avatar

Im with you Lucius

Betsy L's avatar

I'm pretty sure that's what happened. There's so much radar and other surveillance equipment on ships that there's no way they missed those ships slipping past. The captain was probably smart enough to realize that firing on those ships would be a provocation that neither side, nor the world, needed.

Lucius's avatar

I would certainly hope so.

Albert L. Berarducci, Jr. MD's avatar

Yes, Lucius, a Three Stooges meets the Marx Brothers film festival would make more sense than the plots and schemes hatched by today’s conservative Republiclan party helmed by Orange Mussolini and his retinue of MAGA-droids! “Watta contrey!” …

Mark Slattery's avatar

Could someone in the media please ask our president and republicans how Iran just attacked three ships if their navy is "obliterated"?

Miselle's avatar

If ONLY someone would take up Jeff's challenge! I still assert we need a GoFundMe to create a HUGE pot of $$ to award the first journalist to take the challenge. You know that would be the biggest GoFundMe EVER, and Trump would get sooooo much attention, which is exactly what he wants.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Until Carol Leonnig from MS NOW or someone from The Atlantic is invited to KKKaroline’s Eva Braun Briefing Hour, it will not happen.

Pam Humphrey's avatar

Ya’ think we could convince Donnie Dimwit to donate to it?

Miselle's avatar

well....it WOULD be the biggliest ever!

Lois Henry's avatar

I’ll contribute - but there must be a good use for the money if no one ever steps up during the orange outrage’s lifetime. Ossoff for President maybe?

Betsy L's avatar

Mark Kelly for President. Mike Walz for Veep.

Lisa Kent's avatar

I love that idea! It would have to be enough to put your career on the line. Or maybe not. If I was hiring journslists, I would hire the "winner" in a heartbeat!

Chris Ortolano's avatar

When I joined the Navy in 1982 we got flu shots every year, so this requirement has been around for a long time.

The Navy will be particularly hard hit since since they are stuck in a berthing compartment for months on deployment with as much as 80 other people in a space with racks stacked three high. The flu will spread like wildfire.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Send that fucking tattooed drunken Nazi Kegstand out on a submarine tour of duty.

myhoopbabies's avatar

Here here! This is an excellent idea. He would be in tears by the end of the first day. God I hate that guy.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Cram a bunch of people with no flu vaccine on the same boat for months. That's just stellar warfighting right there.

Carol C's avatar
4hEdited

On the other hand, George Washington eventually decided to vaccinate his troops against smallpox, after losing lots of them to the disease earlier.

Pete is no George Washington. No student of military history either, it seems. Just pitifully insecure about his masculinity.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

Pete isn't even on the same planet as GW.

rlritt's avatar

Hopefully the servicemen are smarter than Hegseth and will continue getting vaccines.

Easterncedar's avatar

Does “not mandatory” translate into not provided? Does getting a shot require private medical access? Would they have at least to find and pay for their own vaccinations?

rlritt's avatar

Good questions.

-Comment-'s avatar

Haha, yes, Elizabeth Warren really did use Mr. Warsh “as a chew toy” yesterday.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Election denier Warsh

Got treatment justifiably harsh

He used the MAGA deflection

About the '20 election

He's stuck in the MAGA swamp marsh

Richard's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Jane's avatar

👏👏👏😂😂😂

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Warsh even looks like a weasel

Jane's avatar

👏👏👏

Derek Smith's avatar

Thanks for the Flippy McCrushnuts GIF. I really needed to see it today!

Miselle's avatar

⬆️🎯👏🏼

myhoopbabies's avatar

Love it. That GIF always makes my morning feel more complete. It's comforting to see such a vile human eat shit like that.

Maria 🇮🇪's avatar

Every. Damn. Day. Jeff It’s Exhausting and I live in Ireland!

(Hope Ye are doing ok!💚)

Richard Von Busack's avatar

GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!

Fastball Fredo's avatar

Jeff, redistricting ordered by Donald in the Texas episode, no vote on that issue….of course cause Texas u know. This maneuver was then taken up by purple or blue states with the voter’s approval even though redistricting should take place every 10 years. So the guy who bankrupted casinos and solved 12 wars thought he could win more votes for his party, instead is imploding, his party is imploding and come November, if we have elections, his party will be the minority… Unfortunately we will still have to listen to MAGAs complain… Best to All fellow Travelers

HI2thDoc's avatar

Back in 2016, someone predicted that if he became the nominee he would destroy the party. After that all the high profile elected officials caved, crumbled and folded like the invertebrates they are. Now that the prediction is coming true, the only ones with the strength to criticize him are those who are not running, like Tillis or Neanderthal Greene. What used to be the GOP, now variously the party of Putin, the party of boozing adulterous thieves, the party of predator protectors gets what they so richly deserve. Their Faustian bargain ends the way it always would.

Fastball Fredo's avatar

Doc u brought up an important point I’ve been tossing around. When u mention Putin, it just seems to me that our country has become so similar to the 90’s Russia under Putin..politically, socially, economically, and wars of imperialism…

HI2thDoc's avatar

Yes. Neo-authoritarianism has been re-defined by Putin in the post-Cold War world. Even someone like him, from a leftist background, can embrace and embody fascist tactics, which in their usefulness in oppression appeals to any and all stripes of dictators like our own orange Hitler.

rlritt's avatar

In all fairness to Greene, she started being very vocally against Trump while she was in office. She was planning to run for another term and Trump said he'd primary her. So resigned her office and will not run. I appreciate that she was willing to give up her office rather than back down on her criticism of Trump. I don't like her politics but give her credit for standing her ground.

HI2thDoc's avatar

She also made a large amount of money by insider trading off of his tariff pause last year.

myhoopbabies's avatar

I'll never forgive her for agreeing with some online wacko that Sandy Hook and other school shootings were staged or false flag operations. That's just the tip of the iceberg of the ridiculous, hateful conspiracy theories she touted for years. Jewish space lasers starting wildfires in my state, Dems controlling the weather, etc. She's a nut job.

RZolu's avatar

The big "IF"...

Susan Sanders's avatar

We in populous NoVA pushed the referendum over the top, because we can smell the swamp gas from here, and because we are home to so many federal employees and NGOs, many of whom lost their jobs. We can thank our new governor Spanberger for her leadership in fighting back, when so many are afraid to do so. I’m proud of us.

Linda McCaughey's avatar

So are the rest of us!! WOO-HOO!!

Mps's avatar

You guys rock!

Major Kong's avatar

Thank you NOVA! In my semi-rural county the vote was 60% no.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Warsh. That’s what my Nana used to call bathing. With all of these clowns, it’s bathing in fraud and ill-gotten gains.

He’s a multimillionaire toad married to Estee Lauder heir money. Just what we need another gazillionaire serving self-interest.

Just as you said Jeff, market manipulation!!!!!!!! they don’t even bother to steal behind our backs anymore

Tacoing has always been about enriching the family, and the cronies.

Let’s let that blue wave in November wash these fuckers out to sea where they belong.

Vote!! and make sure every last person that you know is registered and ready to cast their ballot, please.

rlritt's avatar

And be prepared to have documentation because they may yet pass the cursed SAVE Act to prevent voting.

Susan Marleau Whelan's avatar

I'm beginning to think that the head of the Iranian military wasn't a news host 15 months ago.

HI2thDoc's avatar

A weekend host at that

Linda McCaughey's avatar

Gotta love that one!! Bravo!!!

George A. Polisner's avatar

Thank you Jeff.

Illegal war. State-sponsored kidnapping. Denial of due process. Withdrawal from international treaties and alliances. Inflation. Corruption. Obstructing justice. Abuse of power. Lies. Exacerbating inequality. Trump, Vance, and GOP-led chaos.

It is going to take multiple generations for the United States to recover from the criminally corrupt Trump/Vance Administration -that is, if the United States survives. It's being buried under extreme debt faster than you can say "Trump Casino". Our global reputation as a stable ally and partner is in ruins. Venezuela, Iran, Cuba, the threats to Greenland -all attempts to distract from the Epstein - Trump - Maxwell files.

The economic suffering and despair, the degraded environment, and exacerbation of inequality will be felt by all -whether someone voted for this catastrophe or didn't vote at all.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Don’t forget - that Satanic whore of Babylon Bondi skipped her subponaed deposition scheduled for 14 April.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

So much for leaving it better than we found it..

Kim Nesvig's avatar

I still get “please come back” emails from WaPo. Shit like their contrasting editorial positions on TX vs VA redistricting are a perfect illustration of why all WaPo emails go directly to junk mail.

Tom C.'s avatar

Fuck WaPo. Sideways.

rlritt's avatar

Isn't it owned by Bazos? He's one of Trump's toadies.

Ann Anderson's avatar

If you haven't already, check out the rapid-fire, seemingly endless stream of LEGO videos produced by Iran that torch everyone in TrumpWorld. Brutal and brilliant.

The saying goes, "We've got the clocks, they've got the time." And they're cleaning our clocks. Taco Tuesday is good news for Shady Vance, who doesn't have to participate in another fake negotiation that ends in real humiliation.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Or in Trump-speak they have all the cards. And no deal.

Mps's avatar

The LEGO videos are delicious

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

The one showing Kash Patel as a Lego figure with huge googly eyes was the slayer.

Ann Anderson's avatar

My fave was What do we do with the drunken Hegseth.