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User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit—

"Many Feared Trapped in Mall Collapse After Japan Earthquake, Officials Say"

https://www.nytimes.com/live/2026/07/28/world/japan-earthquake-kumamoto-tsunami?smid=nytcore-android-share

Ugh. I don't know how many readers I have in Japan, but I hope you're all safe.

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

also, Lindsey Graham's funeral is today. Zelensky *and* Netanyahu are going to be there. so is Donny. sounds like a shit-show in the making

HI2thDoc's avatar

Reposted jes' for ol' Lind's funeral:

Graham cracker, we knew you too well

Your bending over for tRump was your tell

You did not even disdain

When he dissed John McCain

Enjoy your MAGA-fueled hell

bruce somers's avatar

Hope they bury him face-down....just saying.

bruce somers's avatar

His friends will remember him better,ass up and licking boots. 👢

Wendy The Druid 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

You think they will get shit smelled out of the room by Donald's Diaper problems, Jeff?

AuntTeeFa's avatar

I read that he smells like urine too😮‍💨

Stephen Brady's avatar

I think Adam Kinzinger said he smelled like butt and armpits…

HI2thDoc's avatar

I believe Adam said "a strange combination of BO, makeup, ketchup, and butt"

Stephen Brady's avatar

I believe he has commented more than once.

DJ Headthrob's avatar

Desperation, body odor and Diet Coke.

Stephen Brady's avatar

He definitely doesn’t change the diaper often enough and I suspect he doesn’t bathe frequently because it would mess up his do.

San's avatar

And I’ve read he smells like pop, urine, and old make up and hairspray. Gag inducing just thinking about it

Major Kong's avatar

"You smell like ointment and pee!" - Louise Belcher.

Ann Hammond's avatar

And the orange 💩 is giving a eulogy speech! UGH

Michael Schoonover's avatar

... which will be all about himself.

Blue Witch's avatar

Honestly, any eulogy Orange Caligula gives will be 1000% about himself and his alleged genius, and zero percent about the decedent. Massive eyeroll.......

Teri Gelini's avatar

He will go on forever and a day about everything but Lindsey….

Richard Dorset's avatar

He will make a throw away comment about Aunt Linds to open the show and the rest of the “tribute“ will be about how his great and dear friend supported and loved Trump (he always has to refer to himself in the 3rd person) except, of course, for that one time when he didn’t, which was when Linds said he was done after Jan 6. But Linds took it right back and bent the knee ever deeper so (mostly) all was forgiven

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

And how Graham's dying wish was to eliminate the filibuster and pass the SAVE Act.

arne link's avatar

OMG! You're right.

Teri Gelini's avatar

He will go on forever and a day about everything but Lindsay

HI2thDoc's avatar

The only things he'll say about Lindsey is how much Lindsey admired him, worshipped him, and went along with him.

bruce somers's avatar

My bingo always has Biden/Democrat Derangement Syndrome,trans-something and the old favorites,windmills,magnets, racism,etc

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

He'll have to insert something mean to mock Lindsey, because he's a rotting old banana of psychopathic sadism. Then he'll chucklefuck it off while his audience decompresses from its cringe attack.

San's avatar

A eulogy speech they say? Sorry Linds you’re getting another typical bat shit crazy spew of sewage from the sweaty old coot. Linds remember when you said Trump was the funniest person you’d ever met? I mean we know you swing for the man adoring team but………..yuk

rlritt's avatar

Really. Do you think he'll stick to the script?

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

Another whopper of nonsense and hate.

Abby From Maine's avatar

Jeff, can't wait to hear what you have to say about that event tomorrow <3

AuntTeeFa's avatar

A day long vomitus event on the eve of the full moon. Yeah boy.

Blue Witch's avatar

Tomorrow, we are expecting a full buck moon in the sign of Aquarius, the hallmark sign of our new eon.

Meanwhile, Trump is the most prominent example of the retrograde past trying to strangle the future. It won't work.

His rubbish is tired, his strength is waning, and he's cemented his reputation as the worst, most corrupt, by far the stupidest failed leader in the history of the Americas, not just the history of the USA.

Sad to watch the degradation of the USA under this moronic clown's "leadership". He reminds me of Caligula, and Commodus.

bruce somers's avatar

8 months distraction from the Epstein Files.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

The ONLY thing I can think of that Graham did post-Trump that wasn't purely for himself was supporting aid to Ukraine.

rlritt's avatar
1hEdited

Why would Zelensky and Netanyauho go there? Graham didnt act like he would be a "hands across the water" kind of guy.

Carol C's avatar

To have a private conversation with Trump. Netanyahu wants Donny to keep the Iran war going. Zelenskyy is showing gratitude for Lindsey’s support of Ukraine, and will ask for more help. It has been observed that Trump decides things based on what the last person to speak with him says.

Both N and Z probably know this.

DJ Headthrob's avatar

What are the odds Phatso somehow makes it all about himself?

San's avatar

Lindsey just got back from where before he died. So many people in the Trump-Epstein orbit are up and dying

Richard's avatar

Oh great lovely! Trump is going to make that funeral about himself. So, he can score political points. I guess you will be writing about that tomorrow morning. Btw, great photo’s of Claudia and Katie!

Vicki Greene's avatar

Lots of material for tomorrow. I love you but I just wish for a week without any.

Wendy The Druid 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

SO Nate Silver ran the numbers and it turns out the tangerine fucklord is underwater at 41.8% approval, 56.1% of the country wants him gone, and gas is sitting at $4.11 a gallon after he swore up and down he'd have it at a buck fifty by lunch on day one (laughs). And the model now favors the House flipping. and here's the thing, Donnie FucksHisPants — you can't redact a midterm. you can't pardon a spreadsheet. So the receipts are printing and they're not in your favor, dumbass Donald.

https://thistleandmoss.com/p/what-survives-the-morning-nate-silver-says-trump-is-fucked-i-believe-him

Tom's avatar

How can almost 42% of our country support this man? It is frightening! At least 56% of us can see through all the shit. And, yes, everyone I know is sick to death of him. Can’t stand to see his face or hear his voice!

Blue Witch's avatar

I only read his floundering words because his whining voice grates on me so severely that I simply cannot bear it.

john augustine's avatar

all due respect to Nate Silver but I do NOT believe those polls

arne link's avatar

Polls are easily skewed. If you poll only Magats then he polls in the 90's. Polls are generally done to support a particular point of view.

San's avatar

He all sweaty these days. Looks like the end is near

arne link's avatar

Lord, please hear our prayer.

Deb's avatar

I wasn’t polled. Does that matter? The mental health of those blessed with critical thinking have to stay alive and focused. This weary soul needs a minute. Going to hug a tree and talk to squirrels…..mindfullness🌻

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

It means our IQ is really low. -0

rlritt's avatar

41% approval! He was 35% last week! What did he do to win over more people. I heard his approval was down to the low 30's.

Stephen Brady's avatar

Nate Silver is a tRump apologist.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

I don't know if he's a Trump apologist but he is definitely propping up the right. He's been on my shit list since he called Democrats "libtards" about ten years ago.

Wendy The Druid 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

It depends on the polling.

Rassmussen , who only polls Repugnicants, says he's at 49.

Ipsis says hes at 41.

Disqus says 39.

There are different polling agencies.

Cheri Collins's avatar

And different populations polled.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Different polls, different sampling methods. Trump didn't suddenly get more popular.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

That's one of the higher approvals he'd polled lately, but then it's Nate Silver who I haven't taken seriously sine he used the word "libtard" — not ironically.

Genevieve K. Rothkopf's avatar

Yeah that doesn’t sound correct at all

john augustine's avatar

it is all in how u ask the questions

Marion's avatar

Hmmm I'm thinking that I quit listening to Nate in 2016.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

Fuck him and fuck his Tigers

celeste k.'s avatar

...and he can't steal a landslide.

HI2thDoc's avatar

But oh, heaven knows he will try

Genevieve K. Rothkopf's avatar

I lived in Tucson, Arizona in 2020. They recounted the votes in Maricopa County where Phoenix is four times. It was so satisfying to see them get more votes for Biden with each recount.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Chris Cillizza made the argument that Trump knows the SAVE Act won't pass, but he keeps harping on it -- and Thune -- so he will have a scapegoat for the shellacking he's about to get in the midterms. It's *never* his own fault.

San's avatar

DJT the worst president ever!

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

And a title he will own forever.

Wendy The Druid 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈's avatar

I mean, he's even worse than Harding, and Harding got caught taking bribes and shit. That really say something.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

Mr Jeff, every day we are one day closer to one of the happiest days of our lives.If I am not passed out dead drunk and pantsless on the sidewalk on the evening of that great day, it won’t be for lack of trying.

Nancy's avatar

🤣🤣🤣 Thanks for a good laugh, Richard!

Mary Lou Williams's avatar

Hopefully everyone on this site is validated and the shellacking happens BUT how will we endure between November and January when the new Congress takes office? Trump and his buddies will be evil on steroids as their time will be coming to an end. We have learned from the best (of the worst) how to deliver retribution. Reading Regime Change I wonder how many of the law firms he extorted are providing the pro bono lawyers implementing these travesties. Anybody know?

SethTriggs's avatar

How horrific! I am hoping that rescue will be swift!

bruce somers's avatar

I'm still trying to figure out why Assolini was invited to the Correspondents Dinner Uncle Jeff, and Kaitlin Collins was on with Jon Stewart and he asked why she takes the abuse from Trump,she really had no answer except it's not her place to respond,what BS, probably the same reason Jake Tapper still has that concerned look on his face permanently, they're paid big money to do it.

john augustine's avatar

because her salary requires that she shuts up

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

These people who do not stand up for truth and our Constitution are useless cowards.

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

I hate cowards worse than bank robbers. Waaaaay worse.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

If they cut off Emperor Stenchley’s fingers, it’d be microsurgery. I guess he wanted to hold a flashlight under his chin when he told that nifty finger cutting story, but the light got absorbed into the folds of his neck, with its startling resemblance to the south end of a northward facing cow elephant

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

Trump is just a snake oil salesman. Cheap stupid and dumb.

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

We lost our country at the Mueller investigation. Too many compromised, too many bought off, too many trusting, too many smelling opportunity, too many dumb. I knew it then.

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

How can a dumbass like this have a strangle hold on a country that had so much????

San's avatar

Omg terrible

Susan Niemann's avatar

"I’m so fucking tired of this fucking fuck."

This is the perfect summation of how we all feel. If we don't make the midterms a mandate, I shudder to think of America's future. 😳

Katies little dress at preschool! Super cute! ❤️❤️

Mary Brock's avatar

Canadian here: It is how I feel. I am so sick of, I am sorry to say, the United States of America.

Michelle Kenoyer's avatar

As an American, I sadly don't blame you. 😔 I am sorry for the state of our country right now. Please know that lots of us are volunteering every day, every week, every month to register voters and elect more Democrats. We will set things right and hopefully soon.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

The next president will have a lot of cleaning up to do, including restoring our historic friendship with Canada. The burden will be on the US to repair the damage.

arne link's avatar

Imagine how we feel.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I live here…and I’m sick of it too. We are not a smart country.

Lynn Van Haren's avatar

The majority of us are too

Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

“The perfect summation of how we all feel.” Well said, Susan! We’re all sick and tired of this. Vote like your life depends on it, people!

Paula Dean's avatar

Our lives and our futures DO depend on the midterms! The entire planet is counting on us!

Susan Niemann's avatar

You are so right.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

What a dress on Katie in that photo.

I WANT THAT DRESS!!!

especially back when I was 5...

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

I wanted a tutu. Today's kids are so lucky they can wear tutus as every day dress. We could only wear them for ballet recitals.

Paula Dean's avatar

Oh how I loved wearing my tutu for ballet recitals! I've never felt so pretty! With the possible exception of my wedding day...a longer ballet tutu!

Paula Dean's avatar

I like Claudia's outfit too!

Martha's avatar

Is he talking about the dirty Haitians in Ohio, the lazy no good blue state and it's immigrants? Oh wait, Ohio is a red state, and Haitians in Springfield single handedly revitalized their community. As per the residents of Springfield, I'm sick and tired of him also 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Punkette's avatar

It’s atrocious. Remember what Shady Vance said about the “eating dogs and cats” lie: (paraphrased) If he needed to make shit up to get the media’s attention, he would. And of course the media ran with it and pretended it was true. 😖 A pox on them all.

HI2thDoc's avatar

And who the fuck are the dummies who still voted for T/V when they knew the cats and dogs crap was a lie?!

Punkette's avatar

The maga racists and nazis, aka “Trump’s base.” They love that he gets away with these egregious lies.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

ICE intends to begin the round up you know since their protections expired

May they fail miserably!

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Luckily, the Haitian refugee sponsored by a couple I know, was able to get into Canada with his family and is settled in Montreal where he will be an asset to the community.

Chicky Mama's avatar

Even DeWine, the republican gov of Ohio, admits Springfield is better thanks to the Haitians.

I will never forget watching the debate and hearing that nonsense spew from his 🍊💩 pie hole. I also will never forget the feeling of despair as I listened to news of Harris doing poorly in the debate the following morning 🤬

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

The media ALWAYS says the Democrat did poorly. Even Biden in his terrible debate was not worse than Trump – the media just made it seem so.

Carol C's avatar

In that debate Trump was louder and talked faster. Didn’t answer the questions, but “dominated.” The media was not going to be picky about whether Trump made any sense or was at all truthful.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

And yet making sense and telling the true are what matters, not how fast and loud you talk.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Have to disagree. Trump was his usual terrible self. Biden was disastrous. And I think he was one of the most effective presidents in the last several decades.

devourerofpancakes's avatar

His brain is stuck in the 80's so he's probably thinking about NYC in the 80's.

rlritt's avatar

Yeah but Trump says they are eating puppies and kittens so we hate them.

David Talbot's avatar

We are all approaching a place where all bits of erudite or even whimsical observation of this catastrophe are unavailable to us anymore. All of the snark is gone from my brain. I am almost entirely depleted of sarcasm and wit. All I have left is FUCK THIS SHIT. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS SHIT IS HAPPENING. I AM FUCKING EXHAUSTED. I assume this is by design.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Just like he employed the Gish Gallop during the debates, his daily (hourly?) firehose of bullshit is exhausting and overwhelming. And unprecedented. Combine this with the spinelessness of the Guardians of Predators party and the oligarchic media, and we are constantly assaulted by malfeasance and lies. By design, definitely.

Cheri Collins's avatar

Yes, I am reduced to tooth gnashing and screaming, like the “the stupid, it burns” cartoon.

rlritt's avatar

I hear you, man.

Brenda Ball's avatar

Feel the same, and yes it’s by design! But we must persevere!😓

Lisa Bieber's avatar

I'll bet you're exhausted Jeff! This onslaught of fuckery IS exhausting. I think most of us are tired. I also think most of us are wildly grateful for the work you share. The combination of information, humor and community is a blessing and a refuge in these insane times. Thank you.

Fastball Fredo's avatar

“He’s right in your face every damn day” Jeff, I believe that is the primary reason Mel lives in NYC, she can’t and won’t handle Donald anymore…that’s up to Natalie, chief diaper bag lady…. And where is Barron? If Barron is such good friends of the Tates, why isn’t he publicly defending his buds? Best to all fellow travelers..

HI2thDoc's avatar

Barron the freakishly tall nerd

Seems like a strange sort of bird

Got his parents' bad traits

So he worships the Tates

Another crime family turd

Fastball Fredo's avatar

Another crime family turd 💩, well Doc… who isn’t a turd in that family?

HI2thDoc's avatar
1hEdited

Exactly. Some may be less prominently turdish, but his immediate family is over the top shitty in every way. Look at Barron's insider trading and prediction market windfalls. Crooked is inherent in that family.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Barron’s got some splaining to do starting as to why the Tates have phones in lockup. Hopefully under oath.

rlritt's avatar

Usually they are banned in jail. Maybe someone is texting for him or he is getting special treatment.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

Rumored that Barron is the special treatment on their behalf

Rapist in training. Like father like son.

Scott Gilbert's avatar

Like Jeff, I am also fucking sick of the fucking fuckfaced fuck, and his fucking fuckheaded fuckup cult members.

Maggie&Lefty's avatar

methinks thou fuckist the fuckfuckiest.. and its fucking grand! 🤣

HI2thDoc's avatar

Looks like we all still got fucks to give

SethTriggs's avatar

America's Pilonidal Cyst shares the same hatred that millions of Americans do, and that's why he has the keys to the kingdom.

We have to outnumber the bigots at the polls and defeat their unreconstructed party. It has to be taken out of power if only for a *semblance* of a check on this moldering pricktator.

The Patriotic Majority's avatar

Wow. I had to look up Pilonidal Cyst; gross…perfect.

Lisa Bieber's avatar

Seth has been brilliantly consistant with that one.

Diana's avatar

I’ve had one- had surgery they are a real ass pain!

arne link's avatar

Damn, you made me look it up and I'm sorry that I did. Yuck.

Paula Dean's avatar

Thank you for your service. I will continue to simply imagine what it is, and that's horrible enough.

PunkAtHeart's avatar

Huh, I wonder if the cardboard cutouts cheering him remember when the Communist Democrats bailed out GM with American taxpayer money so they could still have jobs?

michellefromchicago's avatar

Those darn Communist Democrats! Especially Barack HUSSEIN Obama, who is also a Marxist and a fascist! How DARE he bail out GM and save the US auto industry? Who did he think he was – – the president or something????

Kay-El's avatar

Short-term memory is winning over long-term memory. 🙄

Kathleen Weber's avatar

Fuck fuck fuck

Fuck fuck The Donald!

Fuck fuck fuck

Fuck fuck The Donald!

Rockin and a Rollin / rocking and a reeling

What a scam!!!

Tess's avatar

Absolutely the most honest wording ever-and we are ALL so sick of this lying POS! Claudia/Kate pics are beautiful!

celeste k.'s avatar

Too bad the funeral today is for lindsey, and not the traitor in the White House.

HI2thDoc's avatar

I'd settle for a joint service

Natalia Lincoln's avatar

Good idea. We could all use a joint right about now.

HI2thDoc's avatar

He's a lying, brutal dummy

His regime, like the Pool, is all scummy

If you need mental relief

From that rapist thief

Try a CBD gummy

Coleen M's avatar

I think the perfect day would be if all of the White House reporters said fuck you for a day and no one showed up. I saw Kaitlan Collins on the Daily Show last night, Jon was really tough, but she said her job is to get answers to questions, not criticize, but to repeat the question until there is an answer or they ignore her. I know we call them useless, but she has a point, she is there to report, not give her opinion, not point out how stupid something is, not ask him what the fuck is wrong with him (sorry Jeff) but just to report the news, ask questions, get answers, and not react when trump attacks her because that gives him a win, and she will never do that.

The Patriotic Majority's avatar

I understand your perspective. But journalistic integrity doesn’t require reporters to ask questions in a vacuum. They can—and should—provide historical, constitutional, and legal context, if not also traditional (you can substitute “normal” if you’d like) practice’s and behaviors so the public understands why the question matters.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Just once I'd like to see a reporter accused of "fake news" answer back by pointing out that the chief source of "fake news" is the endless stream of BS that pours out of his mouth.

San's avatar

Kaitlin Collins is in charge! She takes the room and Donnie can’t manipulate her It’s fun to watch how much it drives him crazier

Rhesus's avatar

And "communists"?? Resurrecting an outdated and discredited scare word is an act of miserable desperation.

The Patriotic Majority's avatar

Yes; they’re resorting to Plan C.

… it must be somewhere in Project 2025.

rlritt's avatar

That's what I think is so weird. I know Miller probably thought that term would scare people who are ignorant and over 60, but does that word have any relevance now?

arne link's avatar

His bestie Putin is supposed to be a communist. Word has no meaning anymore. That scare went out in the fifties.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Ex-communist. He was KGB but I don't believe Russia is considered a Communist state any longer. Ironically, Trump is best buds with two of the remaining Communist leaders - Xi and Kim.

rlritt's avatar

Exactly. So why is he using to insult people since its meaningless.

San's avatar

What does it even mean in this day and age to call a heckler a communist? He’s so stupid

San's avatar

And his smile that looks like a grimace

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

true. I'm sure if i worked at it long enough, I could have made today's opening paragraphs the length of an encyclopedia

Ellen McKenzie's avatar

That’s when he fills his diaper.

Jane S.'s avatar

That weird grin he gave (twice) during his speech at the WHCD while telling and explaining (twice) the "joke" about old senators was just bizarre. Frighteningly bizarre.

Terri Nighswonger's avatar

I think of all the putrefying looks of the man the puky chicken skin sag makes me just about vomit.

Robin Barfoot's avatar

I just finished reading a book about Jim Jones and the massacre he caused at Jonestown in Guyana. The parallels between Trump and Jim Jones are striking.

arne link's avatar

Gosh, that must have been a tough read.