how many fucking flags does Sam Alito salute

it’s time to impeach Heaven Appealin’ Sammy

this fucking guy.

it’s bad enough for a Supreme Court Justice to believe that Little Donny Fuckface is a very special boy who deserves to be exempt from all laws.

it’s bad enough that this same Justice is bought and paid for by plutocrats who jet him off to one luxury all-expenses-paid vacation after another, with the implicit promise that he’ll rule the way they tell him to when their cases come before the Court.

it’s bad enough that when it came time to strip women of their right to healthcare, this same Justice cited the medieval ravings of some god-mad seventeenth-century zealot who presided over witch trials, for fuck’s sake. that’s right: pregnant women are now bleeding out in emergency rooms all over America because of the pig-ignorant beliefs of some misogynistic dipshit whose life’s work was to hunt down witches women who talked too loudly.

and it’s bad enough that eleven days after the failed coup of January 6th, this shitbag hung an insurrectionist-loving flag on his front lawn.

now we’re learning that this loathsome creep has been flying a second flag, at his beach house — a flag that celebrates Christian Nationalism, the fucked-up-beyond-belief notion that God Almighty intended America to be a Christian nation ruled by Biblical laws, and all the other religions can go fuck themselves.

This time, it was the “Appeal to Heaven” flag, which, like the inverted U.S. flag, was carried by rioters at the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021. Also known as the Pine Tree flag, it dates back to the Revolutionary War, but largely fell into obscurity until recent years and is now a symbol of support for former President Donald J. Trump, for a religious strand of the “Stop the Steal” campaign and for a push to remake American government in Christian terms.

hey Heaven Appealin’ Sammy, is this flag your wife’s fault, too?

the dumbest fucking people in the world are all over social media right now, blithering about how oh no no no it’s a revolutionary war flag, how could you accuse Sam Alito of having some darker intent.

oh sure, and the swastika is a sanskrit symbol for well-being. that’s why the Nazis adopted it, because they were so into ancient near-eastern culture. yeah, that checks out.

look at these homeys. just a bunch of normal hombres, out for a peaceful afternoon of civil war reenactment and a general concern for well-being.

you know, it’s pretty weird how Sam Alito, a 74-year-old dude, is so steeped in the knowledge of arcane extreme-right symbolism. Alito sold off his Budweiser stock after transphobes called for the beer to be boycotted. he’s obviously gorging himself on a steady diet of far-right media. how soon before a photo of him wearing a MAGA cap surfaces? how about some spray-painted gold sneakers, Sam? have you bought yours yet?

speaking of “soon,” why the fuck did it take four years for us to learn that Steal Stoppin’ Sammy hung an insurrectionist flag days after January 6th? wouldn’t this have been handy information for the public to have had, say, FOUR YEARS AGO?

and now we learn that Sammy’s been hanging a Christian Nationalist flag outside his beach house for a least a year. here’s an idea for our worthless scribblers of the press: how about, oh I don’t know, reporting on this stuff when it happens?

isn’t it important for people to know that a Supreme Court Justice is a white supremacist? what the fuck, media?

hey, did you know that Holy Mike Johnson flies this same flag outside his Congressional office door?

these flags are very public fuck-yous. it’s not enough for Christian Nation Sammy to hold these abhorrent beliefs — no, he’s got to rub your face in it. Alito is just another MAGA troll.

this Supreme Court is broken — because it’s not just Fishin’ Trip Sammy who’s a problem.

we have Money-Grubbing Clarence, who is so bloodsucking greedy that he threatened to quit the Court if someone didn’t grease his palm, pronto. up stepped Nazi-memorabilia-loving Harlan Crow, who now underwrites the lux lifestyles of both Clarence and his insurrection-planning, election-denying spouse.

we also have Beerheart Brett, who was so blackout drunk all the way through prep school and college that he literally has no idea how many women he assaulted. who paid off his debts? who paid for his country club membership? we’ll probably never find out.

then there’s Nihilist Neil, a bomb-thrower who hates the very idea of government. according to Neil, government should exist only to … pay his salary, I guess.

and let’s not forget Aunt Lydia Comey Barrett. don’t be fooled by the sometimes-sensible words that tumble out of her mouth. in her heart she’s still a dyed-in-the-wool religious extremist. her fingerprints are all over the Dobbs decision.

and we have Useless John Roberts, the ineffectual Chief Justice who lets these rogue Justices walk all over him.

hey, let’s check in on Dick Durbin. he’s Chair of the Senate Judiciary Committee. he’s got the power to hold Alito accountable. I’ll bet he’s hopping mad over this shit. I’ll bet he intends to drag Sammy before the entire committee and —

Key Senate Democrat doesn't plan to probe Justice Alito over upside-down flag

Judiciary Committee Chair Dick Durbin said there’s not “much to be gained” with a hearing. An upside-down flag outside Alito’s home drew criticism from senators, including Republicans.

oh my god. what are you doing, Dick? “not much to be gained”? are you fucking serious?

But Durbin said he doesn’t plan to hold an inquiry.

“No, we haven’t got anything planned. I think he’s explained his situation. The American public understand what he did,” he said. “But I don’t think there’s much to be gained with a hearing at this point. I think he should recuse himself from cases involving Trump and his administration.”

what is this tepid let’s-just-shrug-our-shoulders-because-whatcha-gonna-do bullshit?

“The American public understand what he did”? what, just because we heard about it, that lets him off the hook? no, Dick — we understand what Alito did and we demand action.

right now there’s an election-denying, insurrectionist-loving Christian Nationalist sitting on the Court, poised to make Dear Leader’s assertion that laws are bullshit and I should get to crime all I want a reality. is this what you want, Dick?

enough with these weak-tea calls for recusal. Alito isn’t going to recuse. he believes he’s on a mission from God to save America from the unwashed heathen horde. if you’re a god-bothering zealot, you don’t recuse yourself from a Holy War. calls for Steal Stoppin’ Sammy to resign are equally futile. it’s never going to happen.

Congress needs to impeach Sam Alito’s insurrectionist ass.

it all starts with you, Dick Durbin. hear that phone ringing? America is calling.

wake up, grow a spine and do your fucking job.