405 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

today in "Shit That Happened While I Was Busy Writing This Shit" —

I have no idea. I didn't even check my socials once while writing this post. so you tell me, what did I miss this morning?

Unity In Defiance's avatar

The FBI raid with Temu Bond Villian Tulsi Gabbard being spotted (and picture being taken of her there).

They took all the voter rolls and election voting machines etc

Totally innocent i'm sure... right on the heels of Pam Bondi blackmailing MN for theirs....

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

no, I mean what happened during the three hours I was writing this post?

Unity In Defiance's avatar

Oh Tom Homan had his presser and he showed up without any bags of cash having to be handed over to him...

OFC he just stood there and lied the entire time. And said BS talking points like they "will move out of MN if law enforcement cooperates."

zuzu's avatar

He called Minnesota a "theater."

Not ominous at all.

Unity In Defiance's avatar

As a veteran, the language used today by that CAVA bag of crap ENRAGED me to a level I cannot quite put into words.

“Deployment” “Theater” and then ofc Teacup Nazi Bovino saying “Green Machine” are all cosplay semantics.

These are MILITARY terms used by the MILITARY. Not a bunch of cucks larping around American cities assaulting and killing AMERICANS.

Robert Eckert's avatar

Bovino misused a religious phrase "turn or burn" meaning, repent or go to hell. "Turn and burn" appears to mean "change your behavior in such a way as to make your damnation even more certain."

shee-rah's avatar

Here’s what I say to that Nazi Bovino: MOO! MOO! MOO!

DR Darke's avatar

"[Tom Homan] called Minnesota a 'theater'

"Not ominous at all."

Yeah, an empty theater showing MELANIA! 😈

That's how popular ICE's tactics are.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Wishing could report the death of Dear Leader, but no…

Frederick John Polsky's avatar

It's a bit horrifying that Groom of the Stool is probably an official government position again. I just hope it ain't some poor PFC assigned the duty. lol. doody.

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

Donny had several diaper changes?

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

Still looking for those 11,780 votes he didn't get. He just can't let it go. Yeah, the appearance of Gabbard is just weird. She's sort of been disappeared. She has some sort of "intelligence" gig that no one seems to know what it is.i hope the fair elections lawyers are already on this. I'm sure they are. They've pushed back on most of this stuff.

Maui Wahine's avatar

The regime is going to revive a dead theory about satellites from Italy that flew over the US and magically changed votes.....and also try to weave Maduro into the conspiracy theory. Maybe they got confused and thought Maduro is an Italian name? Anyway, more "today in CrazyAsFuckTown."

Ransom Rideout's avatar

No, we all know it was Muskrats' Starlink satelites beaming cellphone Bluetooth commands to the "inspected" voting machines.

shee-rah's avatar

Maybe these satellites also changed Harris votes to Trump in 2024.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

No more Jewish space lasers - that Georgia trailer park cun+ is gone

steve robertshaw's avatar

I don't know why this National Enquirer presidency doesn't just go to the gold standard of these things and claim that aliens from outer space changed the votes. And he could post an AI image of Elvis on the moon to accompany the statement.

Pamela Van Sickle's avatar

Where was this? Damn, they really want to win in Nov. FDJT! RELEASE THE FULL UNREDACTED EPSTEIN FILES. THEY MUST BE SOMETHING WE ALL NEED TO SEE YOU FN MORON.

Unity In Defiance's avatar

Georgia, Fulton county.

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

That is good because the machines spit out bullshit already proven with the Gore v Bush race shocking, vote for one and erase a vote for that one (Gore) and then give to Bush.

DR Darke's avatar

"The FBI raid with Temu Bond Villian Tulsi Gabbard being spotted (and picture being taken of her there).

"They took all the voter rolls and election voting machines etc

"Totally innocent i'm sure... right on the heels of Pam Bondi blackmailing MN for theirs...."

Where was this FBI "raid" again?

Anne Haines's avatar

Georgia on my mind...

Linda Weide's avatar

I think of the movie "A Clockwork Orange," which I saw before I read Burgesses book, where they used behavior modification called the Ludlow technique to teach the main hoodlum to have a negative response to the crimes he had committed. Could one do that to Trump with his racist hatefulness. Can aversion therapy give him a fear response to the things that ICE has been doing, and the January 6 rioters. Would the "Ludovico Technique" work on Trump?

Meanwhile in Germany a petition is going around today for people to sign, which is going to go to the German government asking for ICE agents not to be allowed into the EU, particularly not the entire Schengen zone for the Winter Olympics. Here is a link. Please share. https://innn.it/ice-out

Also, discussion of teams saying they will not attend the World Cup soccer if they have to play any games in the USA, to help pressure corrupt, butt licking FIFA to cancel having the WC in the US.

Another thing that should show up in your This week in Stupid, but I am not sure who are al the stupids involved is this piece from 404 Media that tells us that an App that was supposed to help people with their porn addiction is revealing their masturbation habits.

https://www.404media.co/app-for-quitting-porn-leaked-users-masturbation-habits/?ref=daily-stories-newsletter

DJ Headthrob's avatar

Technically, the Ludovico Technique but I get your point. Trump would break the machine. They would prop his glossies open and force-feed him Big Macs and Diet Coke. And he'd love every minute. Yarbles, I say!

Linda Weide's avatar

Would they play YMCA? I think there was more physical discomfort than that in the Ludovico Technique. The technique would be things he would love but not enjoy.

Claudia Montague Wheatley's avatar

Yes. They also drugged Alex so he would feel nauseous while watching the violence. But what really upset him was the soundtrack, which included music by "the old Ludwig Von." So any time he heard, for example, Beethoven's Fifth, he'd feel like vomiting.

Linda Weide's avatar

Yes, but it had been his favorite before. So, how about it with the YMCA?

DJ Headthrob's avatar

Of a Lee Greenwood/Kid Rock mashup.

Linda McCaughey's avatar

I want to sign it but cannot read it!

DebJS's avatar

I was doing ok until I got to the dropdown selection for Country. There is a United States Outlying Islands but no United States or USA. Hmm... It's almost like they think all of us here are on board with the current president's agenda, or something?

Steve in SoCal's avatar

A horrorshow film, that

Lisa Dekker's avatar

The only reason those six Brits bought tickets to the Bezos-Trump Rom-Com is so they could throw bags of popcorn at the screen. Wait, do they do popcorn in UK theaters…or was it old teabags??

Linda Weide's avatar

I thought it was influencer reviewers there.

Elizabeth Schulz's avatar

I don't remember ever getting popcorn. As a small child all I wanted were 'smarties' or other chocolate goodies (rare for us).

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

The movie was solid, Trump has been a horror show since birth Steve!

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

The title, "A Clockwork Orange," actually suits him. If Alex and his droogs had assaulted, raped, and murdered protesters and immigrants, he would be the perfect son Shitler always wished he could have. Maybe that's Barron's destiny.

Martha Howell's avatar

He's well on his way there. Sources attribute the Tates' freely walking around the US instead of rotting in a Romanian prison to the actions of the First Son, an admirer.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

It should be an easy call, considering the French member arrived early to practice and prepare for the upcoming match. He has been jailed, starved and abused in detention since his arrival Linda.

Linda Weide's avatar

A real life horror show.

arne link's avatar

What is that about? I missed it.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Irony - we’re spinning up Nazis for the nation that invented Nazis to reject

Kate's avatar
Jan 29Edited

https://www.courthousenews.com/fulton-county-election-fraud-claims-revived-as-fbi-seizes-2020-ballots/

Trump took another boot step toward authoritarianism as his Weaponized FBI seized all the ballots from Fulton County under the auspices of verifying election integrity in the 2020 election. warrants signed by U.S. Magistrate Judge Catherine Salinas.

It scares the crap out of me.

Claudia Montague Wheatley's avatar

It should, since the real reason they did it was to un-register Democratic voters in that county.

Melinda Morrell's avatar

I want to know the name of the judge who signed off on that raid. Make him/her famous.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Ironically, that judge cun+ Salinas began her legal career in 1994 at Texas Rural Legal Aid on the Mexican border. Fuck her.

https://icle.gabar.org/speaker/catherine-salinas-1233856

DebJS's avatar

A Magistrate Judge - plaintiffs' attorneys probably will NOT consent to jurisdiction by a U.S. Magistrate Judge and have the case reassigned to a sitting U.S. District Judge.

Chet Brandt's avatar

Tulsi Gabbard, national intelligence director, was caught on film lurking around the building while the FBI raid was going on. WHAT THE FUCK WAS SHE DOING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE???? Something nefarious is going on….

Kay's avatar

They had her incognito dressed all in black, cap, lurking about cosplaying a spy. Maybe spying on us for Russia to destroy evidence and another huge distraction for voters in Georgia and let’s not forget the Epstein files!

BluDotInARedSewer's avatar

Methinks ‘festering cum-sock’ should be the next Oxford Dictionary word o’ the year. I, for one, intend to use it every time I refer the festering cum-sock-in-chief until then end of time.

Cathy Wray's avatar

BluDot, I really like your name.

Tess's avatar

Not a damn thing! :)

DR Darke's avatar

Apparently there might have been an attempted coup in China, and Emperor Xi's former Goodbuddy and Right-Hand General Zhang Youxia is either under arrest for "Being unfaithful to the CCP", or in hiding, or dead.

Linda Weide's avatar

I think that Xi made up whatever happened as he and fascist leaders in general are known to do. My book club is reading "1984" right now, so this is crystal clear.

DR Darke's avatar

Oh, I'm sure! Now Xi the Pooh is claiming Zhang "sold nuclear secrets to the United States", a claim so out of Far Right Field it's breathtaking in its audacity.

Only problem is? He doesn't have the "iron control" over everything that Mao had, or that 1984 postulates. He's got a large educated population (97% of Chinese are literate as of 2020, and 16% of Chinese people are college-educated)—and one who's already aware of how the CCP crushes dissent to stay in power. They might submit because the alternative is tanks, but I doubt they're fooled.

Most Chinese could live with that provided China's economy kept growing, but Xi's idea of power is based on land and conquest, not the economic rules-based order. (He's a lot like Putin and Trump that way.) Like a lot of authoritarians he lets corruption flourish because it makes his country's economy look thriving and corrupt people are easier to control (and get rid of when they're no longer convenient!), but the result is what the Chinese call "tofu dreg" manufacturing—bridges and buildings where bamboo with a steel wraparound or thin wires replaces solid steel, auto bodywork is done with ramen or bricks rather than metal or carbon fiber, concrete is thinned out with more water or cheaper grades of sand than are recommended....

User's avatar
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Jan 29
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US Blues's avatar

Hell yeah! It’s about time more musicians started stepping up! Love RAM!

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Springsteen was a surprise guest… Morello definitely made it, but as my cuz, a fairly well known guitarist told me Zach seldom leaves his Colorado home for gigs!

Linda Weide's avatar

Hollywood has been conspicuously silent about the goings on.

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

The man is a proven dumb liar

Who thinks that the world is on fire

He lit the torch

From Mar-A-Fucko's front porch

And it flames his disastrous desire.

And Melania's film is a flop

My schadenfreude just will not stop

A gold digger dummy

Who's in it for money

Never mind, ol' Stormy's on top!

(Of her husband.... for twelve brutal seconds.)

HI2thDoc's avatar

Bezos must be a dumbshit

Who can't come to grips with it

He burned $75 mill

To be Melania's shill

On a film that's an anti-hit

arne link's avatar

Sadly, that is just lunch money for Bezos. In the olden days the super wealthy would fund libraries and colleges. He could do so much good in the world, but he decides to be a monster. His ex seems nice.

Marie Drozdis's avatar

Your point isn't lost on me. In the past, the robber barons would build or endow institutions in order to remain in memory. What did Trump, Bezos, or any of their pals contribute to the enrichment of America? The world's richest man? Nada.. Oh, he contributed a lot of 'playthings' but nothing of any lasting meaning.

zuzu's avatar

His ex is awesome. She's single-handedly redefining how charity is done. She puts zero restrictions on the money she gives out, and it turns out that when you do that and trust the people you fund to know what they need better than a donor does, they actually solve problems better than restricted giving. Which is causing ripples in big-money charity circles.

BTW, the new thing with the current wife is that celebrity stylist Law Roach, who's worked with Zendaya and Ariana Grande, has been seen going to the Paris shows with her. He works wonders, but she still looks like ass. Black Threads is not having it.

A lot of people are wondering what Zendaya is going to do. She and Law have had a very fruitful partnership, but she has refused to be photographed with Sydney Sweeney, and they work together. This is someone who works for her. I don't believe she's currently nominated for anything, so she's not really working the awards circuit as hard as a nominee would, but I wouldn't be surprised if he lost a lot of his celebrity clients over this.

Declan's avatar

I still contend she is his handler

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

She’s a Paolo Zampolli client from the Tito Stalin spit in 48… was part of Yugoslavia, gaining independence in the early 90’s,she was recruited to be an Epstein girl, as were many others by Zampolli and Jean Luc Brunel….

Dubious that she has an intelligent brain cell in her head Susan, considering she married a total idiot!

arne link's avatar

She was smart enough and had an excellent gag reflex so that she could marry money. Or what looked like money at the time. Maybe she really is a Russian plant. God knows, Donnie is stupid.

Eileen's avatar

I think Melania is a Russian plant. Her father was in the party. Yes, could totally be conspiracy, but when your roommate is one degree from Russia...it's too tasty a treat for a KGB officer to ignore.

https://vocal.media/theSwamp/is-trump-s-connection-to-russia-his-wife-melania

Kathleen Weber's avatar

How would we deal with a sociopathic habitual liar if there wasn't video to prove what goes on real world? Let's go to the film!!!

Pam Humphrey's avatar

We could Rocky Horror it. You know, wear costumes and stage makeup, throw things at the screen, yell stupid stuff in a Melanoma accent. Could be fun.

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

I'd do it....if I didn't have to PAY to get in!

Just think....every Build-a-Bear store in the US would run out of Mooses & Squirrels!

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

cablecargal's avatar

Love the idea but throwing dog shit at a theatre screening of Melanoma will get me kicked out!!

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

We'll all get together & watch it....after MST3K gets ahold of it! 🤣

Kathleen Weber's avatar

What an EGGSELLENT idea!!!

Kim Nesvig's avatar

The old saying applies again: every accusation is an admission. Trump’s accusation that Omar had herself sprayed is yet another example projection. Gosh, could it be an admission that the supposed assassination attempt was staged?

Susan Niemann's avatar

I will go to my grave believing that was staged...and I would LOVE to know if the Secret Service people around him were paid to assist in the ruse.....nothing surprises me now.

Declan's avatar

After the SS scrubbed/deleted all the data from the phones on Jan 6, I knew for sure that HRC observation of a great right wing conspiracy was accurate. There was NO WAY an expert could find out what was on the phones??? That topic just disappeared and media NEVER mentions it till this day

Keith's avatar

there are still files on the kennedy/kennedy/king slayings the government refuses release!

NO TELLING THE SHIT KEPT FROM THE PUBLIC!

HI2thDoc's avatar

I hate these unmoored conspiracy lovers and their whacko "theories" but from what has been analyzed of that incident, it does seem fishy. Did the SS detail around him know that the shooter had been neutralized before they stood him up in plain view? Within mere seconds of him being "struck" by a "bullet?" That seems to be either galactically stupid or they knew they could do it for the photo op. Also, as has been pointed out by many, the top edge of the ear pinna sure looked intact only a couple of weeks later. That seems unlikely, to put it mildly.

arne link's avatar

It was fake. Totally fake. The SS does not stand you up after a purported attempt on your life. Also, the fist thing was so staged.

Lin Talbot-Koehl's avatar

I grew up w/ a brother who spent SEVERAL YRS undergoing extensive reconstruction of both his ears (birth defects - left ear stuck *straight* out from his head....right ear was the same, except the top HALF of his ear had NO CARTILAGE in it whatsoever).

Seriously - FEEL your ears. What's in there? A THIN cartilage structure, a *miniscule* amount of fat, & a blood supply, from capillaries. PERIOD.

The cartilage is SO THIN, that if a bullet of ANY caliber were to even just NICK it, it would SHRED. How would you fix that kind of damage? Could you do it in 45 min in a small town ER? HELL, NO. Cartilage barely heals in CHILDREN....& doesn't heal AT ALL IN ADULTS.

First, you'd have to anesthetize the patient (GENERAL anesthesia, not a local). Then you trim away the damaged skin (cauterizing capillaries as you go). Next, you trim AWAY the damaged cartilage....meaning, CHANGING THE SHAPE OF THE EAR. Then you trim the skin FURTHER, to match the NEW shape of the cartilage. Drains would be installed (no room in there for free fluid). You'd spend AT LEAST ONE NIGHT in the hospital....drains would be pulled, & rather than a CHUNK OF GAUZE taped over it, the HEAD IS WRAPPED, like a mini football helmet, to hold the ear against the head (to prevent rolling over on it while sleeping, getting dressed, etc). After two or three bandage changes - over the course of two or three WKS - you'd be healed enough to remove the bandages.

Translation: This is MAJOR PLASTIC SURGERY.

Keep in mind that the head (including the EARS) has more CONCENTRATED BLOOD FLOW than almost every other part of your body. This is because - w/ certain exceptions - this is where people's BRAINS live. We've all gotten a small cut on our faces at some point....& they bleed like hell.

Look at the video. #Bumblefuck puts his hand to his ear, takes it away, & looks at it - NO BLOOD - then ducks behind the podium. When he re-emerges, he's suddenly COVERED in "blood".

Except, that WASN'T blood. It was a THEATRICAL BLOOD PACKET HE HAD IN HIS POCKET, that he slapped against his head while he was hiding behind the podium. And the ONLY REASON he'd have that in his pocket? Because IT WAS A STUNT, TO GET PITY & OUTRAGE FROM HIS MINDLESS MAGAtS.

And TWO PEOPLE *DIED*, all for an EGOTISTICAL PUBLICITY STUNT....one innocent man in the audience, & the HIRED PATSY who was SACRIFICED by his OWN PEOPLE.

Fuck that guy....fuck him TO DEATH! 🖕

Denise Donaldson's avatar

Hadn't thought about their standing him up, Doc. Legit point!

Rosemary Orlandi's avatar

that's when I knew it was either staged, or donnie was having a tantrum....

CE's avatar

Yep, because his big ugly pumpkin head would likely be hard to actually miss

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

It never touched his ear clearly it went exactly thru the ears. Now that’s some shootin’.

Hollie Rood's avatar

I’m right there with you Susan and believe 💯 the young “would be assassin” was groomed and set up to be a stooge. Even if the 🍊🤡💩’s ear had been nicked by a minuscule of a centimeter, he could never have had the reaction he did. The adrenaline would have been overpowering AND he would still be talking about it today. His silence speaks volumes 😡🤬

Bob's avatar

Trump learned from Roy Cohn the value of a distraction and playing victim, all while declaring his righteous indignation.

Joe Witkowski's avatar

Too bad that Satanic fuck Roy Cohn didn’t share his deadly disease with Orange Hitler

Bob's avatar

Was the only malady he didn’t share.

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

His hatred for Omar is inexplicable. I'm not fan of the so-called "Squad" but the more I see of Omar the more I respect her. She's kind of kept her head down and done the work; she's polite, focused and even has a sense of humor. She's not an AOC-type showboat (or worse, Cori Bush, yuk). The more you see of her the more she's hard to dislike.

Rachel C's avatar

Your description of her is exactly why he hates her, and any other woman of color who is obviously more competent than he is. 👹

Anastasia Pantsios's avatar

which is basically ALL women of color.

Gently, Jack Jones's avatar

Agreed regarding Ilan, and Corey Bush, but any politician who is playing on the national level has to be visible and known of to be effective. Democrats are criticized by the left and their supporters for not speaking up - at least AOC is. Every time I have seen or heard her speak, she seems authentic, genuine and informed. I haven’t ever felt she was “showboating”, but even if she is, how else should someone in her position speak on a national level (as many of her supporters seem to want)without appearing to “showboating”? Seems to me that having someone with her intelligence and courage (and media attention) speaking out on a national level is something we all need and want. And if Ilan and AOC are truly allies (?), then they are both playing to their strengths. Quiet or “showboaty”, I would hate to face either one of them while they are pissed off!

Douglas Paul Truhlar's avatar

MSP airport is run by Somalians, they are working in MN everyday.

arne link's avatar

I hope you are right. So much is hidden from the public.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Which it certainly was Kim…just another in a long line of psyop government programs Kim. The morons wearing Kotex pads on their ears afterward, and an ear that healed miraculously, sans any scar

Eileen's avatar

Brilliant catch by Jeff! A friend of mine worked in Hollywood and said the bloody ear was totally faked. Of course, that's easy chit chat over coffee and nothing evidentiary. However,

Trump's hand is inflamed for days after his dementia drugs are administered, but his cartilage heals in two weeks?

Patty Mooney's avatar

And that HE is a fraud. LOSER.

Pam Humphrey's avatar

The first thing I thought when I heard his response.

Cathy Wray's avatar

In real life, he would be whimpering on the ground. So, if he staged the whole assassination attempt, that means the secret service was in on it, too. I'm not sure that whole bunch of criminals could keep a secret.

Leu2500's avatar

i swear that they are using body doubles. I think they use tie color so they know which one it is.

& ears are as unique as a fingerprint. so if you got hit in the ear with debris, that's an explanation for why ears don't match. (i'm not to the point of looking at pics of his left ear during his first term & comparing it to left ears now, but I've thought about it. they are counting on we can't stand to look or listen to him. the MAGAts aren't bright enough for them to worry about.)

Koko in AZ's avatar

On Omar: "I don't think about her."

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

She lives rent-free in his brain!

Bob's avatar

He doesn’t think about her, except for every time he needs a “villain” for his gaslighting about immigrants.

serenity's avatar

That one caught me too. When is he never thinking about her? Every time he gets on his crappy app he's complaining about her. Every speech he wanders his way through, he's denigrating her. He never stops thinking about her. Or Obama. Or Biden.

Susie's avatar

Or the autopen.

Songgirl Kim's avatar

Thank you to Bruce for being the badass Boss that he’s always been!

Kim Nesvig's avatar

Share Bruce’s song widely. It will annoy the fuck out of Trump when it reached #1 on Spotify.

Songgirl Kim's avatar

I have and I will continue!

Dave Devine (Cologne, Germany)'s avatar

Sold more copies (to me) than total tickets sold for the Melania movie!!!

karen strano's avatar

Actually the one thing that would be interesting about Melania would be found in the still unreleased Epstein files.

Susan Niemann's avatar

"the decency to scamper back into his cigar box, close the lid, and never be heard from again."

Excellent! 😂😂 There is video of Ilan behind the podium as the d-bag sprays her and her posture was like "Come and get me asshole". She is not afraid of these scummy people!

And someone called Melania the Marie Antoinette of our time...I like that. Evidently a bunch of the crew who worked on her vanity project "movie" asked to not be listed in the credits since they are embarrassed to be associated with the project. And the director is a sex pest... that figures.

Jayme Wolworth's avatar

Ilan is a shero. She also said that the guy "was saved by security". Gotta love her spunk.

And her comment about Trump having dementia! Priceless.

CE's avatar

She was ready to deck the guy if security had not intervened!

HI2thDoc's avatar

Don't fuck with anyone who has been through the shit that happened in Somalia.

zuzu's avatar

She actually had a pen in her hand, so I think she was going to shank him.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Yeah, Brett Ratner is a predatory POS. If he does direct another Rush Hour, I'm not watching it and I'm gonna lose respect for Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan if they do it. C'mon, guys, you must have enough money already.

Denise Donaldson's avatar

Nuh-uh. Marie Antoinette was beautiful, intelligent, and actually politically savvy, having been brought up in the Austrian court. Melania....is none of those things, to be charitable. She does embody Marie's spoiled selfishness and extravagance, however.

Susan Niemann's avatar

😬👏👏👏👏

shee-rah's avatar

Now that Melanoma has that $40K, she doesn’t need to request alimony when she dumps Donny.

Susan Niemann's avatar

Oh she’s got a whole helluva lot more than that! She’s supposed to be worth $50 million! But Id ask for the alimony anyway. 😂😂😂

Kelly's avatar

News Flash: Trump, Oprah, President Obama, and a 7-year old girl were flying on a private jet. Pilot intercoms back to the passengers "we have plane trouble and we need to bail out. I've got my parachute up here, but in that pile of stuff back there, there are only 3 parachutes, so you 4 need to decide who gets them." Trump says "I'm the most important person in the world, so I get one." He grabs from thew top of the pile and jumps. Oprah says "I'm the most generous woman in in the world , so I should have one." She grabs a parachute and jumps. Obama says to the little girl, "I can tell you have a bright future so you take the parachute." Little girl says "we can both have one." Obama relies, "There's only one left. Little girl says "No, we can both have one; Trump grabbed my backpack."

Jane's avatar

👏👏👏😆

Susie's avatar

Ohmygawd!!!! That is just a thing of hilarious beauty!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Cathy Wray's avatar

Hahaha, good one!!!

Leslie Goodman-Malamuth's avatar

Reagan jumped out of the plane with a sleeping bag when I first heard this joke.

Unity In Defiance's avatar

Teacup Nazi Greg Bovino is such a fucking stolen valor larper.

Saying the "green machine" WTAF. That is the term for the MILITARY not a stupid gaggle of out of shape, cowardly, couldn't pass a PT test, wannabe Gestapo goons.

That little coward still has wet dreams about being in the military... bet he couldn't join because he was too small to get on the ride, although I highly doubt he even tried because he is too big of a chickenshit to put his life on the line for his country where it really matters.

Mps's avatar

Too short to get on the ride

Hahahahahahahahahaha

Mary Greenwald's avatar

He is bigger than my Niece who is in the army!

Unity In Defiance's avatar

I think that proves he never tried to go sign up and actually serve his country.

He is just a larper, thinking he's some commando badass, for gassing babies and flashbanging grandmas on the streets of his own country.

Rosemary Orlandi's avatar

she can probably kick his ass....lol

Jane's avatar

Teenie weenie Nazi Bovino

Joe Witkowski's avatar

They are all fucking mall cops with 007’s

Jane in NC's avatar

"There were bloody footprints where mercy should have stood." THIS is why Bruce will always be The Boss. 💔👏👏👏👏

Denise Donaldson's avatar

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tess's avatar

Bruce Springsteen for the win-great song! Big Wheel of Moron…well that is some pretty big fucking wheel Jeff! Have a safe and nice day everyone!

Neal Stiffelman's avatar

Tell Homan that Fat Tony wants that $50K back PLUS the vig. It’s now $200K. In cash, muthafucka. Next week it’s $270K.

Bob's avatar

And, “Fuck you. Pay me.”

HI2thDoc's avatar

I wish that were the case. Then Homan the Toeman would end up inside a steel barrel somewhere

Sarah Shurtleff's avatar

I hope the Springsteen song is played on every platform that plays music until the whole country and the globe are ringing with it.

Jan Moon's avatar

And I hope the Boss's song surpasses all the renditions of Lee Greenwood's God Bless the USA. It is so much more sincere.

Kathy H's avatar

Oh, cripe, no comparison. Also, YMCA as a national anthem & kid rock being elevated? No. Springsteen is a lot truer about being 'born in the USA' & what it means to ALL people here! Not some shit about benevolence from a white sky daddy, but the power of Spirit in each & all of us. ❤️🤍💙

Derek Smith's avatar

About to die of a lack of the Hegseth gonad knackering .gif. Please Jeff. Find a way to insert it. Please?

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I hear you. there just hasn't been a spot for it lately

Peaceful Mary T.'s avatar

I don't think it needs a special spot, Jeff. Throw it in anywhere! We need more laughs!! :)

Joyce's avatar

Just on general principles, for the common good.

Susan K.'s avatar

Jeff, thanks for ending with Bruce’s great, inspiring song. I’d already heard it. My local CBC radio station, in Vancouver, Canada,- played it as today’s “wake up” song

Linda Weide's avatar

Someone on an Indivisible Abroad chat said that the mayor of Bologna, Italy played at at a rally the day it came out. People in Germany are not the only ones against ICE coming to the Winter Olympics. Of course there are people in Italy who are against them coming.

Kay-El's avatar

1. Trump used a Magic Eraser sponge to make his ear wound disappear.

2. Melania’s movie will earn a coveted Razzie Award next year

3. Überfuckwit Bovino reminds me of the tiny, yappy dogs in my neighborhood.

Susan Niemann's avatar

I am delighted in the lack of ticket sales. 😂😂😂

No one deserves to be humiliated more than Mrs. Trump.

AuntTeeFa's avatar

She humiliated herself when she accepted his ring

HI2thDoc's avatar

That's a match made in Just Desserts Heaven. He married for youth and looks, she married for money, and they both got what they deserved

Sharon Hudnall's avatar

Mail Order Melania was passed around the international Epstein club and sold at a discount to Trump, willingly. Epstein even joked about it in the files ("slightly used").

Linda Weide's avatar

I think she married as her Eastern European Model/Spy assignment.

Pam Humphrey's avatar

…and again when she showed up in that stupid hat.

Cathy Wray's avatar

That's gross, isn't it? Well said.

Linda Weide's avatar

I always assumed that was her job as a Russian asset, to marry him and get him into the White House, and Putin would take over from there.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

Except her husband. That will come when the next administration systematically eradicates everything Trump thought was securing his "legacy."

Cathy Wray's avatar

Oh, that will be so great!!!

Linda Weide's avatar

Especially because her humiliation is his humiliation. I read a review. It was what you would expect. Appropriately horrible.