346 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

goddammit, I gave that hat away a few weeks ago. it was frayed and a little threadbare and I had completely forgotten that Ms. Spouse had worn it on our wedding day, else I have kept it for sentimental reasons. oh well, c'est la vie

Dr J's Sanity Space's avatar

Someone else is probably having a good time wearing it with Ms. Spouse’s spirit.. ❤️

Miselle's avatar

Jeff, I believe that hat was meant to go on into the world. I agree with Dr J's comment. Just as Ms. Spouse is newly experiencing eternity on an astral plain, so is her hat is embarking on a new journey. I would think she is pleased you set it upon it's way and she is appreciating seeing it loved.

george  campbell's avatar

You said that perfectly Miselle .

J Hardy Carroll's avatar

I bet you have enough memento mori to make you start weeping at every turn, bud. It hasn't been very long. When a spouse dies you lose more than half of yourself. They're your partner and shared memory bank. You can see why people get obsessed with spiritualists and seances. Any contact is welcome, any comfort.

Diana's avatar

Yes I agree ☝️- grieving is not on a time table that’s for sure‼️

HI2thDoc's avatar

Can you get it back somehow?

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

nah. I donated her clothes (after giving our daughter first dibs, and Ms Spouse's friends second dibs) to a shelter for women. I'm sure its found a new and deserving owner by now

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

That shelter for women needed your donation. You did a good thing; hard, but good.

PS - You were pretty good-looking in that wedding photo. Claudia was beautiful, but you had it goin' on, too.

Diana's avatar

I said the same thing to my husband- Jeff was wicked handsome- Claudia was simply beautiful ♥️♥️

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

He was a hottie. Still is for an old guy. I'm not so bad for an old girl, meself. LOL.

BigDaddy52's avatar

Exactly. Same with My Beloved's stuff.

Difficult to give away, hoping someone gets good vibes.

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I still have all her jewelry. I can't bring myself to part with it yet

HI2thDoc's avatar

There's no need to. Keep them if it comforts you to do so.

Michelle Kenoyer's avatar

Hold onto it as long as you need, even forever. I have some of my mom's jewelry (she died this past November), and I don't even *wear* jewelry that often except my own wedding band. But I will hold onto it unless one of my sons has a daughter, and then I'll pass it along to my granddaughter/s.

Cindy's avatar

My mom died over 30 years ago. I still have a few pieces of her clothing and a few pieces of jewelry. I have a daughter and a 5 year old granddaughter. My husband died this past August. I gave our granddaughter his glasses and a jacked I had made him. She was very happy. They keep him close.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

I have my grandmother's antique diamond watch given to her by my grandfather who died long before I was born - diamonds surrounding the face, diamond band, platinum clasp...I never wear it because I'm afraid I'll lose it, so I keep it in the safe and take it out every once in a while and hold it. Still love her to pieces.

BigDaddy52's avatar

Yep. Hl2thDoc is right. Still have most of her books, too. And all of her office stuff and old photos. Been a tough 14 months.

HI2thDoc's avatar

My BIL still has many of my sister's things, especially knickknacks and collectibles, and she's been gone almost 12 years.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

My Dad died in 2016, and I kept a LOT of his things, but as time went on, I was able to let go most of it. I kept his driver's license, his pilot's license, his sunglasses...small things that were important and/or personal to him. Books, etc., went to donations after a while.

Diana's avatar

Oh my… still new to the heart ♥️

Bonnie Council's avatar

Then don't. Jewelry is smaller & keeps better than clothes. And mementos are important.

Carmel Ann's avatar

I am 76 years old and still have most of my mother's jewelry. She died at age 39 in 1962. The most important thing I kept was her leather welding jacket. The men were fighting in WWII, so the women were working at home, including welding. My mom's name was Carmel Ann. I still think of her frequently, actually more now than ever.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

Why do you have to? When you're ready, you can give it to your daughter, but you don't have to do that.

arne link's avatar

I have not yet parted with my husband's Hawaiian shirt collection. Those fifty shirts live in the guest room closet. I visit them sometimes...

Rita Linder's avatar

A friend who lost her husband had his favorite shirts made into a quilt which she uses in the guest room.

Leigh Hamilton's avatar

What a wonderful and beautiful idea.

myhoopbabies's avatar

I love this idea so much.

BigDaddy52's avatar

Yep. Like that. So much brings back a wonderful memory.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Very generous of you. The memories will remain as the hat moves on.

Mingo's avatar
3hEdited

I donated my late husband's clothing to Disabled American Veterans since he was a veteran himself. I hope your donations give someone less fortunate joy in their life as I hoped my donations did for veterans. Today would've been my beloved's 72nd birthday.

Cathy Rady's avatar

On my deceased parents' birthdays I make it a point to have their favorite desserts; butter pecan ice cream for dad, strawberry shortcake (under a mountain of whipped cream) for mom.

Susie's avatar

Thank you for sharing those beautiful pictures with us. I have no words of wisdom, but I can see how much you loved and respected her.

Emma Ray's avatar

Such a beautiful couple, and just look how happy they are!

Mary de Ridder's avatar

The things one does in the first weeks of grief…. Buttttt your daughter and her friends had the chance to fish out something memorable and the women’s shelter is a great place for the rest to be.

Emma Ray's avatar

I give lots of usable clothing and home things to the Women's Center for Advancement here in Omaha. It helps homeless women and families. and I get to clear out my apartment, a win-win.

Diana's avatar

Exactly… makes the heart feel good too‼️

Diane Rose Halstead's avatar

You both had awesome hair. Your whole lives. Which is quite unusual. You needed it to cover your awesome brains. That’s my story, anyway. 💚 Keep the pictures coming when you can. We love ‘em!

HI2thDoc's avatar

When I was younger, a very wise and prescient middle-aged woman told me and my cohort to "enjoy your hair." Now I know what she meant.

Deb's avatar

Absolutely love the wedding picture! Always liked the current selfie, but love seeing the wedding picture! Thanks for sharing it. You made my Sunday morning! 💙

Kaye Stone's avatar

After my dad died, mom had a teddy 🧸 made from his clothes. I wish she'd gotten 50 of them!

Mike Hammer's avatar

I see Larry David character in a skit about the hat there, Jeff.

BJ Zamora's avatar

Her spirit lives on in every one of us who agree with you.

Teresa G's avatar

Jeff

My heart aches for you

Diana's avatar

Handsome couple🥰

SethTriggs's avatar

Bless you for doing that.

Eileen's avatar

Every time I think about your loss, it makes me feel so sad and grateful. Sad because too soon, too sudden. Grateful to witness through your writing a love to behold and celebrate. Finally, it is a huge relief to know you have a daughter sharing this journey with you.

Lois Holub's avatar

Someone somewhere will LOVE that hat and Ms Spouse will be smiling at its new life! Good on you for reminding us about letting go (deliberately or not) of the Things while cherishing the energy that remains in our hearts and photos and (hopefully) our memories!

Vee Cross's avatar

Not so much how young you were but how happy you are in that photo!

Stephanie Lajeskie's avatar

You have the photo, and more importantly, the memory. And nobody can take those away from you! ❤️

JoJoRa's avatar

I work with seniors and their families to move to a senior community or downsize. The hardest part about the transition is their things. They don't want to give up their things because of the memories they invoke. I try to gently remind them that the memories are in their hearts and in their heads. It is not the physical thing that holds the memory. By donating the items, someone else gets to create new memories

Susan Keefer's avatar

I’m still keeping my late husband’s things and that’s not a good thing.

I glanced at your wedding photo while I was still reading the top section and I thought that Ms Spouse was Diane Keaton. Beautiful, both of you. 💞

David Skoglund's avatar

I miss Claudia’s posts.

Susan Marleau Whelan's avatar

I believe that hats have a way of finding new owners. How often do you see a hat blow off of someone's head and they chase it down the street, never able to catch it? That hat is looking for a new owner. Unless it's a MAGA hat, then it's hiding until it can made into something else.

Jill Buckley's avatar

The photo is a great memento. Your smiles say it all!💖

Prima Sarcastica's avatar

What a beautiful picture of a beautiful couple! We miss Ms. Spouse too.

Cheryl Opheim Seybert's avatar

Such a cute couple in both photos!! 😢 I don’t know how you feel I haven’t lost my spouse, yet I feel your pain Jeff. 😢😢

SPW's avatar

Awww. Sweet early picture. The age of innocence and hair with identifiable color in it. Those are what will keep you going during those days that seemingly drag so use them and remember the good times. You two sparkled for a long time and it showed. Be gentle with yourself.

Stacy Etheredge's avatar

Okay, so somebody else now has the hat to enjoy. You're the one with the love story and the memories. ❤️❤️

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

I just updated this post, because at the exact same time I was clicking the 'publish' button, Soybean Scott Bessent was whining to Maria Bartiromo about how Spirit Airlines was Joe Biden's fault.

https://x.com/Acyn/status/2050943567624057219

Kay-El's avatar

1. Joe Biden will be remembered for getting us out of a pandemic and getting our economy back on track. Donny will remembered for fucking everything up.

2. Your wedding pic is beautiful as is the picture of you two growing gray together.

Jane S.'s avatar

Perfectly stated, both points 😻

Bob's avatar

As if these ass clowns couldn’t have gotten Spirit and JetBlue to a meeting to resurrect their merger. That mean old free-market loving and Reagan appointed judge who stopped it the first time would be kept out if the way. Those pesky antitrust laws, consumer groups? Ignored. Libertarians like some of what Donny does, but this government buying into companies ain’t one of them.

george  campbell's avatar

Remember when Mitt Romney was urging the administration and Congress to let Detroit auto industry fail ---and then Obama saved it with loans ? And the loans were paid back ahead of schedule ?

Bob's avatar

And The Republicans whined and complained about how the government shouldn’t pick winners and losers. Despite the fact that GM and Chrysler failing would have cost hundreds of thousands of jobs in the auto industry alone. Some opponents said it wouldn’t matter because the U.S. operations of foreign automakers would pick up the slack. That crackpipe dream fails to take the collapse of the automotive supply chain into account. The lack of a few components can bring manufacturing to a halt. The timeframe for ramping up production by suppliers and surviving automakers would have been about two years minimum.

Wendymae's avatar

I supposed they would prefer that Jet Blue go under, which may have been the case if they succeeded in buying Spirit. Then they'd be blaming Biden for allowing that to happen.

Karen Yaholnitsky's avatar

I find it interesting that MAGA is starting to include Steve Buttigieg in blaming things on. He is a star rising in poles as a leading candidate for President. It will only get worse but Steve is very good at hitting back with actual facts. He is a very smart person, with class.

CAM from 🇨🇦's avatar

You must mean Pete Buttigieg is rising in the polls.

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Pete is an amazing intellectual Karen!

Patricia Finley's avatar

It’s Pete, not Steve, btw.

Diane Rose Halstead's avatar

Bessent is SUCH an ass! Just a giant, fucking ass!!

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

No, I think he's smart enough to KNOW he's lying. He's a gutless wonder and a sycophant.

Joel's avatar

They all got their talking points! Not that they have been updated since he was preznit elect.

mnakloon's avatar

Beautiful wedding pic and always love seeing the more recent one. Love and light to you, Jeff ❤️

Lois Levenstone's avatar

Bet Scotty never set foot on a Spirit flight. I went on one, and it was more than enough (company policy to fly the cheapest airline and route).

SPW's avatar

Oh, Soybean Man 🤣🤣🤣🤣???

george  campbell's avatar

Of course he is . That's all they have left .

Cat Cafe's avatar

Oh my Lord that wedding picture. You two were so in love, and stayed so in love. What wonderful emotions emanate from both those photos and both of you.

J Hardy Carroll's avatar

Oh man that is so sweet. I like to think of what Chief Seattle said. "There is no death. Only a change of worlds." I see my dad all the time, so I tend to believe this.

Jane S.'s avatar

I wish I could like this response 100 times ❤️

Christie's avatar

First time around it was on Obama…now it’s “sleepy” Joe who NEVER fell asleep during a Cabinet meeting…I love Joe, have for 50+ years and also supported him over all those years! The bloated Yam cannot own anything he’s done and will always blame everyone else but himself, people with a brain KNOW it’s not Joe…and where the blame rightfully belongs!

Lynn Van Haren's avatar

He was like that when he first started out in business in NYC & he hasn’t changed one bit

Susan Niemann's avatar

What a lovely woman. Thank you for sharing this picture. I can feel the love between you.❤️

Is everybody SICK AND FUCKING TIRED of blaming Joe Biden for everything? If we don’t turn this around in November, we are royally screwed.

Tess's avatar

Duffy sucks! ( as do the rest!)

Mary de Ridder's avatar

If you don’t turn this around in November you deserve to be screwed. Just it won’t be very royal or vaguely classy.

Dana Jae Labrecque's avatar

Because they KNOW we will win in a landslide, they will not let November happen. I’m going to pretend it will though while stocking my pad with everything. I’m now officially a hoarder of water and dry goods, and keeping a bullhorn and several squirt guns nearby.

Lucius's avatar

"Donny stayed the course on Iran"

Man, and the press wonders why no one fucking trusts them anymore.

HI2thDoc's avatar

After the occasional spasm of sanity, WSJ reliably veers back into batshit Murdoch rag territory

Mingo's avatar

MAGA lexicon. War= misbehavior. Rape= hanky panky.

Lucius's avatar

Unless a Democrat does it.🙄

Major Kong's avatar

Guns = Freedum. Seashells = ATTEMPTED ASSASSINATION.

J Hardy Carroll's avatar

Trump no longer has anyone to check his worst impulses, not even the 140-character limit and the fact his best drawing was a pre-pubescent girl on his rape-buddy Jeff's birthday card. Somebody showed him how AI works (probably took ten tries to get his dim rotten brain to understand the concept of describing something to his phone) and now he shits in his gold recliner watching fox news and dipping his Big Mac in ketchup while fat-fingering shitty images that get treated as policy.

Welcome to the Blame Joe Biden Cinematic Universe, where a discount airline going belly-up gets retconned into Joe’s fault by some former reality-show background extra with a job title that sounds like it was made up by an OpenClaw HR agent.

Spirit implodes (that's what airlines do right? Remembers Braniff?) when Trump closed the Strait of Hormuz he took a welding torch to the birthday candle. Now the entire airline industry has a fuel bill written in blood and we get Sean “I Was On TV Once” Duffy, blinking into the lights and insisting this is all on Joe and Pete, as if Buttigieg has been sneaking into Mar-a-Lago at night to personally unscrew the bolts on every Spirit airframe. He's GAY too!

Iran is more powerful than ever. They have complete control over the Strait no matter how much Trump rage-tweets. The naval blockade of Iran starves the global oil supply, but to Trump it's “a very friendly blockade,” because Vlad's oligarch friends can cruise their megayachts through there. Maybe the Navy’s out there handing chocolates and scented candles to tankers they’re boarding at gunpoint? Sounds like the Hilton to me.

The odious Wall Street Journal editorial page applauds him for “staying the course” as if he’s anything other than a malfunctioning Roomba in bronzer. Worse than that, because he's jacked up on Adderall and steroids while declaring hostilities over and simultaneously threatening to start bombing again “if they misbehave."

And don't forget that 30% of polled Americans think this is a good job. As Carlin said, "think of dumb the average person is and realize half of them are dumber than THAT."

HI2thDoc's avatar

Man, I wish Carlin were here now.

J Hardy Carroll's avatar

Me too, but I'm also glad he doesn't have to suffer through seeing this shit. Ditto with my dad.

Major Kong's avatar

Ditto with my Dad.

Daniel M Kimmel's avatar

I lost my mother in the summer of '24. I miss her, but I'm glad she's not seeing what's going on now. She *detested* Trump.

arne link's avatar

Yes, he would have made mincemeat of the current regime. Fortunately, we have Josh Johnson to take up the slack.

HI2thDoc's avatar

Josh Johnson rocks! He had a really good one about being flagged by TSA for brass knuckles (which he does not own)

Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

Yes! I love that story! Look for it, people. I won’t give away what the “brass knuckles” really were! This link might work: https://youtube.com/shorts/TRB-VIORaNQ?si=iHwew1VMuDC3D2UV

Cathy Rady's avatar

OMG - this story is hilarious!

BJ Zamora's avatar

Carlin would certainly contribute to the conversation!

But I also recommend Carl Hiaasen’s “Squeeze Me” for some excellent commentary on Mar -a-Lardo.

ErinL.'s avatar

Hiaasen is king when it comes to the antics of Floridians, corrupt politicians and total hypocrisy. Love him—thanks for the recommendation of Squeeze Me!

Bob Kent's avatar

I just borrowed,downloaded, Squeeze Me from my library. Will start reading it tonight. Hansen is brilliant 👏

Chris Hierholzer's avatar

Hunter Thompson would be nice. He was a real wood chipper!

Patrick Daniels aka Cromulent1's avatar

Hunter S, Charles Bukowski, along with George Carlin would be great assets in this insane epoch Chris.

Joan Kristensen's avatar

Wow - your wedding photo made my day. 💖 Please continue to share with us when the impulse grabs you. Also, FUCK all of these people and the media that amplifies them. Every single day is like needles in the brain. 🧠 🔨

Anita Dupree's avatar

Love the photos of you and your beloved. My condolences to you.

HI2thDoc's avatar
3hEdited

After all the crap he's stolen

He dreams up more shit to roll in

But his unfortunate ass wipers

Who have to change his diapers

Wish he would blockade his colon

(What a friendly blockade that would be)

Fran Fried's avatar

Goddamn Biden made it rain here this weekend. I mean, I guess it's a lot tamer than the snowstorm he brought us in February, but still ...

Frosty McGillicuddy's avatar

Mar-a-Lago's some hideous faces

Not human, just soulless embraces

With Botox and filler

They're like Douchebag Miller

Believing they're the master races.

Cyndi's avatar

Believing they're the master racists.

Perhaps?

HI2thDoc's avatar

Sometimes nocturnal dream trips

Play like surreal nonsensical clips

But it's most disturbing

And lastingly perturbing

To imagine Loomer's Mar a Lardo lips

Marian Vitale's avatar

OK, can we make Biden Derangement Syndrome a thing?

Rebecca Lowe's avatar

My heartfelt condolences to you, Jeff, on such a profound loss. There might be a tiny glimmer of light, perhaps, in the knowledge of how much fun and laughter you have gifted to all of us. It's my birthday today, and as is always the case these days, I woke up to more bad news of our degenerate president and all his groveling sycophants. But then your column appeared, and I am now able to start my day with a smile and a chuckle!

FTrump And FPutin Too's avatar

Happy Birthday Rebecca!

Cw's avatar

The picture reminds me of a young Diane Keaton in the Godfather. 😊

Kate's avatar

I immediately thought of Annie Hall!

Ryal's avatar

Yes, yes, yes! I was about to post that as well. Radiant and classic. May her memory make you smile.

Belfora's avatar

Joe Biden ate my homework.

Joyce's avatar

And then hacked it up on my rug. That damn Biden.